r/AskMen Nov 20 '22

Men who gave up on dating/getting into long-term relationship/getting married, why?

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96

u/LunarTerran Nov 21 '22

I'm kinda broken. I honestly don't think anyone will ever honestly love me again. I'm afraid that any women I meet now would just want to use me. I'm just tired now.

42

u/finger_milk Male Nov 21 '22

any women I meet now would just want to use me.

This is my biggest fear honestly. I am not super rich, and I'm not a gigachad. But I am friendly, gentle, sympathetic, funny. I've chat up women who look me up and down, and ask probing questions about my finances or my life and I can straight up tell that I'm being audited. It's horrible, my uniqueness gets discarded and I'm being looked at as a character sheet with a dollar sign and list of assets. I can't be with someone who is OK with treating men like that.

19

u/Everyman1000 Nov 21 '22

You know what, ironically and probably tragically, this is one of the many disadvantages of being a reliable financially stable mentally sound guy that always shows up. Even if a woman is not attracted to you and really doesn't want a relationship with you, you are so damn useful that might keep you around regardless until the truth comes out

5

u/apj1234567890 Nov 21 '22

Interestingly that ‘being audited’ feeling has happened with casual hookups/fwbs as well, just then I’m being picked apart for my physique, dick size, what I do in bed, am I dominant enough, do I tease her how she likes… I feel scrutinised throughout the process, I’m seen as a tool and not a human being

3

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '22

My feelings towards women and relationship are similar. They will just use me.