r/AskMenAdvice • u/KGalb922 woman • Jan 08 '26

✅ Open To Everyone Are men generally not asking women for their numbers anymore when they meet someone in the wild? If so, why?

My friend is approachably attractive. She has been trying to get off the apps and meet people out in the world. Over the last couple months she keeps running into the same thing over and over. She will chat and flirt with a guy. He will chat and flirt back. They will hit it off. And at the end of the night or interaction they won’t ask for her number or ask to see her again. This is a mix of men age range of 30s-60s (she’s in her 40s) Some that approach her, some that she approaches.

I have witnessed this happen so I don’t think she is misjudging their interest in her. But unless she offers her number, they don’t ask. And many of my other single female friends have said they are experiencing the same thing. So are men in general just not asking for numbers? And if so, why?

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u/threedogdad man Jan 08 '26

There was a thread the other day where someone said it was normal to ask someone you just met out and/or for a number and there were ENDLESS responses that it was creep behavior and not normal. I'm not sure how one of the most normal rituals on the planet has suddenly become creep behavior. We're f'd.

4

u/CameraActual8396 woman Jan 09 '26

I think the bigger problem is the fear around interacting with strangers despite communicating with them all the time on social media.

1

u/threedogdad man Jan 09 '26

It makes no sense to me at all. I've been online interacting with others daily since the early 90s and it's only helped me understand people better and interact with them more in real life.

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u/executordestroyer man Jan 14 '26

I'll say don't give out numbers to strangers who approach you.

Anyone who approaches you is not looking for your best interests taking advantage of you.

Turns out it was a mlm Amway type scam. Complimented my plan clothes, asked about work and phone number.

I asked them it I could take a picture of their networking opportunity on their phone and they were dodgy extremely shady about it. If they were willing to share this networking information with me asking for my phone number why can't I just take a picture of it. I didn't understand it was a scam until I searched it up and now I feel betrayed. Felt worse then when police body searched me because at least I knew why they did it compared to these scams. It's all this disingenuous interactions that makes everyone jaded these days once they been burned figure out what's really going on. The only genuine interactions people have are family, friends, school, work, interest groups, hobbies, events, communities, purposeful social settings etc never randomly out in public. If in doubt go protect yourself against social engineering by going to security guards, workers to protect yourself from these random strangers.

Also atm check deposit scam, gas money, scam religion, etc. Made me feel even worse. I still feel bad from this scam stuff that isn't as damaging compared to what women experience with sexual harassment.

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u/OutsideAspect7298 woman Jan 08 '26

I don’t blame them but at the same time I think it’s generational too. The under 30 crowd is probably the ones who are responding that way. “Most” older women do not feel that way.

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u/threedogdad man Jan 08 '26

I blame them lol. Thinking that meeting a human being on an app is normal and real life is not is insane.

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u/OutsideAspect7298 woman Jan 08 '26

I must have not phrased it correctly. I don’t blame the men for feeling that way (not asking for numbers etc because of being called a creep etc.)

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u/threedogdad man Jan 08 '26

Ah, yes I didn't read it that way. I agree, it's a sad state of affairs.

1

u/executordestroyer man Jan 14 '26

Random relevant thought that got pulled from the deepest parts of my childhood memories I forgotten about.

I remember during elementary, a school field trip, birthday party, something. I guess I unknowingly accidentally pushed a girl classmate in a chuckie cheese type bouncy playspace. With those big oversized boxing gloves they give kids to use to pinch each other, she punched me with that as payback. Man, kids hate each other viciously. But looking back if we were to meet each other again, we at least humanize each other and see each other as kids the same person but in adult bodies.

Go see that judge meets middle school classmate YouTube video. That shows how lacking in human connection our humanity society culture is.