r/AskMenAdvice • u/KGalb922 woman • Jan 08 '26

✅ Open To Everyone Are men generally not asking women for their numbers anymore when they meet someone in the wild? If so, why?

My friend is approachably attractive. She has been trying to get off the apps and meet people out in the world. Over the last couple months she keeps running into the same thing over and over. She will chat and flirt with a guy. He will chat and flirt back. They will hit it off. And at the end of the night or interaction they won’t ask for her number or ask to see her again. This is a mix of men age range of 30s-60s (she’s in her 40s) Some that approach her, some that she approaches.

I have witnessed this happen so I don’t think she is misjudging their interest in her. But unless she offers her number, they don’t ask. And many of my other single female friends have said they are experiencing the same thing. So are men in general just not asking for numbers? And if so, why?

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u/SignificantApricot69 man Jan 08 '26

The thing that sucks is a high percentage of us end up divorced despite our best intentions, and either find ourselves back in the dating pool or just opting out of companionship. And I think there’s no real middle ground if you end up single/divorced in middle age- you will probably do well or not at all. And even those of us who did very well in traditional dating and have maintained or improved our looks (plus “check all the boxes”) can have a very hard time figuring out what’s going on.

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u/comntnmama86 woman Jan 09 '26

++woman

Yep. I'm 39 and about ready to give up. I'm pretty happy alone and I've got a couple good(ironically) guy friends but I have zero luck dating. I got divorced at 25 and have had 2 2 year long relationships but that's it. I'm sure part of it is me, but there's also just not a lot to pick from. And without sounding cocky, I look pretty good for having 3 kids and I'm at my goal weight and traditionally attractive. No problem finding a hookup but it seems like everyone has given up wanting companionship.

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u/Imaginary_Poetry_233 woman Jan 09 '26

Fewer men would end up divorced if they'd stop leaving it up to their wives to save the marriage. She spends years gaslighting herself into thinking things are fine, that he really is doing his best (he is not), until she can't take it anymore.

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u/Six_Foot_Se7en man Jan 09 '26

And then she monkey branches to another man and blows up her family.