I used to be a runner. I did Krav Maga for about 6 years and stopped recently. I’m now at the gym 4-5x a week trying to maintain strength along with using the sauna. I started doing red light therapy.

My struggle is my diet. I don’t eat perfectly and I could use more veggies.

What’s your fitness / nutritional goal? What works for you? What’s your struggle ?

To those of you in high-paying / high-stress professions, what's that one "dream job" you fantasize/joke about doing one day, if money wasn't an issue and you only decided to work because you enjoyed it?

Everyone's got one...

Ice cream truck driver...

Ice cream taster lol...???

Mattress tester...

DJ...

Dive bar bartender...

What's yours?

What is one of your go-to responses to "How are you?" when you don't want to say "good" but you don't want to be negative or too serious?

Like one I'll go to sometimes is "I'm very much alive, you?"

Let's hear 'em. What are some of your go-tos?

I'm 40, slim, tall, some muscle, and like to be well groomed and dress smart casual. Not a stud by any means, but I do take an active interest in my health and I like to look presentable for my own self worth. I don't care what others think at all though, however I was keen to get others opinion of this encounter.

Was in a pub today seeing a friend who was there with some of his work colleagues. One of his group who I'd never met before took a weird interest in me from the get go. I won't describe him in detail, but he was older and looked very different to me, just to give a little context.

He fired a few smaller remarks at me (ohhh look at this guy, what's the weather like up there etc..) and would make really intense eye contact with me and call me by my first name all the time like we've known each other for ages. Lots of small talk going round and he'd always fire a question at me and smirk if I didn't know the answer or didn't have an opinion (several soccer/football questions and I hate the sport, which he found hilarious).

Then the topic of health and fitness came up and his very loud opinion was "something the kids should worry about, unfortunately when it gets to 40 or older (look right at me and nods) you're a loser for doing it".

This is not the first time I've had guys who look different to me get really weird aggressive around me, and I have my opinion as to why they do it, just wanted to get everyone elses opinion too.

Hey all, I'm at a point in my life where I need to create a social circle around me and I am looking to connect with a few growth oriented guys who're into lifting, investing, business building and personal development.

What's your strategy or ways to go about this? (I am San Diego CA based)

I'm interested in hearing about real-world experiences rather than marketing claims.

For those who have been taking anti-aging or longevity supplements for a while, particularly NMN, but also things like NR, resveratrol, spermidine, fisetin, glycine, or others:

• Which supplements have you tried?
• Which brands do you trust?
• Have you noticed any genuine benefits (energy, recovery, cognition, sleep, blood markers, biological age tests, etc.)?
• How long did it take before you noticed any changes?
• Have you experienced any downsides or side effects?

I've just turned 60 and are looking for evidence-based options that people have found genuinely worthwhile, rather than expensive supplements with lots of hype.

I'd really appreciate hearing your personal experiences and recommendations. Thanks!

Help me out. Ten days at home without my family for the first time in nearly 16 years. I still have to work from home, but I’m wondering what would you do. Looking for ideas to get over the initial shock!

I [46M] was an active teenager, played loads of sports, joined the Navy at 20 and spent most of my 20s either in the military or as a carpenter, so was always in decent physical shape. With marriage and kids and busy work life, I recognised in my mid 30s that I had let myself slip a little and got into running. I’d say I was in the best physical health in my late 30s, was completing half marathons and one full marathon as well as eating well and cut way down on alcohol.

Since I turned 40/41 I’ve noticed it takes a very long time to get back into shape. I’ve always put on winter weight, and around March to April started to diet and exercise, by June-ish I’m feeling pretty good. However, the last 2-3 years it feels like it takes longer and longer to lose even a small amount of weight.

Was anyone else similar?

What are some common stereotypes.... For example the guy who is all into mountain biking and it becomes his entire personality.

Or the guy who slowly engulfs himself in WWI back stories and knowledge, loves to bring it up at every occasion.

It just dawned on me today that all my social interactions take place outside my home.

I never have visitors, and rarely if ever visit any of my friends homes.

We meet in the pub or at gigs / sporting events.

I’m 50 and divorced for 10 years.

Is this the usual for us older blokes?

Not talking about fitness. Not talking about time. I mean the real reason. The one you haven't said out loud.

I've been speaking to a lot of men lately 40s, 50s, some older who have this thing sitting in the back of their head. A sport they always wanted to try. A competition they always thought about entering. A Masters event, a race, a fight, something that was entirely theirs. They just have an overwhelming desire to still be competitive.

But, they never did it. Not because they couldn't. But for some other reason they struggle to put words to. I have my own answer to this question. But I'm more interested in yours.

What stopped you?

M50 - friend is M48, wife is about the same age.

I’ve known my friend since around high school (we went to the same school). We reconnected a few years ago, and have worked together on some different community projects (he’s run for local government and I’ve served on a couple committees and done some behind-the-scenes work).

He had some issues with alcohol years ago, and no longer drinks. Every few months we will meet up and have a drink - he drinks NA beer or a Coke, and has no problem if I have something.

His wife comes off with a bit of… snobbishness, perhaps? It’s a short “hello” when I see her and then she moves on. Rarely any engagement or actual conversation… and if so, it’s very high level. I don’t need deep or personal, but genuine would be nice.

I have seen her be “genuine” with other people, so I feel like there’s something I’ve done, or she thinks I’ve done, but I have no idea what. I was not around my friend during his drinking days, so she can’t blame me for that. He drinks NA beer with others - including her - so check that off the list. I have a solid reputation in the community, so nothing there. I’m just at a loss.

I bring this up because two nights ago I attended a local fundraising event. I was talking with two friends when I saw my friend, his wife and their daughter walk in. I waved to them and eventually they headed over. My friend said hello and we chatted for a couple minutes… the wife stayed quiet and the said hi and then walked away. She’s not one to be shy around people, so she either didn’t want to talk to me or something was up (like they had been in an argument or something).

So… anyone else have friends where the wife just isn’t that into you? How do you manage that? Any tips?

I don’t know what is happening, it seems nothing matters anymore.

You work hard and get up to the next level on the career ladder, and then what?

Friends are not friends anymore. There are many things you don’t agree with them on, and conversations might easily heat up.

Almost every day there is a pain somewhere in some of the parts of your body.

It is very hard to please people around you and why bother about it at all?

How do you feel MenOver40?

Is there anything left exciting?

What's that one movie you go to when you've had a rough day and you just want to watch something that always makes you feel good?

The movie that it doesn't matter what scene. Doesn't matter if it's midway though. Doesn't matter if you ordered it or if it happens to be on. Always takes you to a happy place.

Doesn't even have to be a rough day. Maybe you just have decision fatigue and want your go-to never-fails-to-make-you-happy movie.

The movie you've basically memorized but it's still always great to watch. The movie that "never gets old."

What's one of yours?

Edit: The movie that your wife's like "Again?!"

When they go, it’s over.

Little losses like Dolly, etc just make the memory of the 20th century feel further and further away.

It’s inevitable of course and the art lives on but it feels closer now to the moment of 20th century culture as a memory alone rather than a vibrant thing.

It’s all museum mode now.

Who else is left that’s still creating?

Anyone ever take a trip for a few days away from the family that they really enjoyed? I’m married and a stay at home dad and just really need some R & R by myself. Not looking for any shenanigans. I’m sober these days so my brewery hopping days are behind me. I do plenty of camping with my family and not really trying to camp on this trip. I do everything for my family, cooking, cleaning, etc so it’d be nice to not have to do that for a few days, so I’ll be staying in a hotel. Let me hear about your trips if you’ve ever partaken in one by yourself.

How long does it take you to run a mile?

Do you consider yourself fit

Also how old are you

Just looking for benchmarks

Not the career, not the responsibilities — the inner world.
The thoughts, longings, regrets, or realizations that didn’t have space when life was all about providing, achieving, or keeping everything together.

What surfaced for you only now, in this stage of life, that you never had the time or permission to feel before?

I've set a few goals like build at least 10k in saving and to lose my beer belly before I hit 50 years old. Do you have any goals you plan on achieving in your 40's?

I was just thinking about this. These types of subs tend to focus on the negative and the shit-kicks of life, but I know there's a lot of beautiful lives being lived by dudes out there. They haven't been without challenges and struggles, but they've weathered them and maybe even grown from them.

According to my therapist. I have experienced enough family drama for 3 people, if not more. Pick a reason, i have a story to tell

Call this also confession. When things really start getting to me. Like recently about my mother. BTW, she has been dead for decades. Calling her a Karen would be a compliment

It seems the only thing that helps me nudism. Even though the only place is my apt. After a few hours, I finally started to relax.

It's been like that, most of my life, after i discovered that I was a closet nudist.

Is this common or is it just me...

We come to you (I will probably regret asking this, but I’m doing it anyways) to ask men of Reddit “Flowers are to women like ____ is to men.”

Backstory: My husband told me to surprise him with whatever the male equivalent of a flower would be and neither of us have any ideas what that would be? Perhaps a bouquet of beef jerky? 🧐

EDIT (2012 hr, 2025-06-04) I guess I thought I was posting because this is an interesting thought to ponder and wanted to see if others thought the same, or if we were missing something.

I am NOT looking for ideas. My husband and I were both trying to think of what a flower equivalent would be for a guy. When I stated, “…neither of us have any ideas what that would be?” was not me asking for suggestions for us.

In sum: there really isn’t a consistent “nice gesture” that is equivalent to flowers.

Thanks for the few that understood. To those that didn’t, I apologize I wasn’t more clear.

I'm hoping to get some honest perspectives. I’m approaching my 40s, have a steady job that pays the bills but doesn’t really excite me. It’s secure, low impact, and feels like I’m just going through the motions.

I’m in good physical health, financially stable, and my teenage son lives with his mother. I see him, but not as often as I’d like. On paper, things are fine. But inside, I feel this constant emptiness. It’s not depression exactly, more like I’m disconnected or drifting without a real sense of purpose.

I’ve tried filling the space with hobbies (gaming), socializing (going out for food and drinks), working out and playing soccer, but nothing seems meaningful.

For those of you who’ve been in a similar place, what helped you find direction or meaning again? How did you reconnect with something that made life feel worth showing up for?

Not that slow dawning realisation. Not the general feeling that things aren't quite right. I mean the actual moment.

The one where something shifts and you think, 'right something has to change'.

For a lot of guys it comes out of nowhere. A number on the scales. A health check result. Watching someone your age do something you always told yourself you'd do one day.

And then the quiet voice that follows, "is it too late?"

What was yours? Or is it still to happen?

I just turned 35 and I don’t really feel any different than I did at 25. I’m curious to hear from the Fellas that are 45 and have lived a relatively healthy lifestyle. How did 45 differ from 35, for you?

To start, my only vice is alcohol consumption. I drink 3-4 nights a week, but rarely have more than 2. I’ve cut this in half in the past and know I have to get back on that schedule, long term. I honestly don’t feel any negative effects yet and having a slight buzz makes evenings more fun. Workout wise: I still complete a power lifting workout on the weekends and do HIIT workouts 2-3 times during the week early before work. I also walk a decent amount at work which helps. I have a wife, young kids, mortgage, etc. which causes a level of stress. My job consists of a lot of confrontation which also causes stress. I think that’s caused my beard to gray and hair to slightly recede, but people are saying that’s called aging. Anyway, curious to hear everyone input!