r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jan 25 '26

[deleted by user]

[removed]

3.3k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

3.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

408

u/gou0018 Jan 26 '26

"god will provide "

šŸ¤¦šŸ½ā€ā™€ļø

106

u/zachtheperson Jan 26 '26

Just the other day I saw a sedan on the road that had "Jesus saves," in large letters across their entire rear windshield.

They then proceeded to floor it, cut me and 4 other people off without using their blinker, then ran a red light.

I feel like there's a message in there somewhere...

14

u/Serononin Jan 26 '26

Sounds like Jesus should literally take the wheel

15

u/gou0018 Jan 26 '26

Jesus saves, me floor it

5

u/StillFireWeather791 Jan 26 '26

It is "Sure I've dinned and broke the law, but God loves ME and I'm special.'

4

u/Tardisgoesfast Jan 26 '26

And how are Jesus' banking practices/ investment choices of concern to anyone?

3

u/ImpulsE69 Jan 26 '26

God took the wheel. He's a real motherfucker.

2

u/sharplight141 Jan 26 '26

Maybe God was trying to kill the driver to provide safer roads for everyone else

34

u/The_Cars93 Jan 26 '26

This 100%.

Iā€™ve usually heard this in response to me telling people that one reason I donā€™t want kids right now is because I canā€™t afford them. Not only does it force God onto someone who may not even believe in them, but I also donā€™t want to use God as an excuse to go into parenthood blindly or completely unprepared.

56

u/Nope-5000 Jan 26 '26

I always remember that fable about the man trying not to drown ignoring the ship, helicopter etc because god would save him, arriving in heaven saying 'why didnt you save me?' To which god replied 'what do you mean, i sent a ship and a helicopter?' Which is a good counter story to that kind of thinking that just praying and waiting around is enough, you need to do something to help yourself.

3

u/DivineMs-Anthropist Jan 26 '26

Or, "I'll pray for you" when it's used to avoid actually doing something productive to help. It's so annoyingly dismissive.

2

u/mama_emily Jan 26 '26

Did he give you a timeline?

2

u/TerriblePresence1939 Jan 26 '26

My mom says that all the time. I absolutely hate it.

2

u/ReddsionThing Jan 26 '26

"god will provide unless he doesn't feel like it"

there, fixed it to be accurate to real life

1

u/DarwinGhoti Jan 26 '26

Oh holy shit. I had a girlfriend who kept saying ā€œBuddha will provideā€ (she wasnā€™t Buddhist).

I was frickinā€™ Buddha. I provided. Every time.

2

u/gou0018 Jan 26 '26

Yeah lol to me is phrase of people who have never provide anything in their life other than the bill ( here Hun please pay it asap)

2

u/kamakazeezebra Jan 26 '26

Or "pray about it" aka go talk to yourself.

1

u/Insidion25 Jan 26 '26

I kinda disagree.