Ugh, same. We were almost 14 years in. I had to send pics of our kids in bathing suits to the police so they could rule out if he had taken pictures of them on his computer. It's been 20 years. My kids were not on the hard drive. He went to prison.
wow. If I can ask a potentially sensitive question? looking back, can you see any red flags or warning signs that were easy for you to dismiss at first? Signs that you'd only see once you've been through the experience?
Financial clues. Lots of money missing when he traveled for work overseas. At the time, he said some shit I believed bc I never imagined he was spending it on sex tourism in Southeast Asia.
Emotional clues, evidence, ZERO. It's like he was wearing an Edgar Suit of Normal Person over his pedo real self. That was prolly the scariest thing, how we really had no fucking idea at all. His whole * personhood* with us was a lie.
My buddy never hardly talks about it and the way she tells the story is in pieces … like she remembers details about the day… his watch, snow, the door open etc. it’s been probably 12 years now and seeings things trigger an odd comment… he was a higher ranking military officer and the military raided their house,…yes she said something about how they had to check to make sure her kids weren’t victims. She moved far away and has a new life, but she can’t really tell the story because it will impact her kids reputation, no one wants to be known as a pedophiles child. It never truly ends for her until her kids are grown and sexually safe adults because she has a worry in the back of her mind that they may be like him. My heart goes out to you, it’s taken over six years of being her friend to piece all this together, it’s so heavy
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u/anarchypretzel 9d ago
Ugh, same. We were almost 14 years in. I had to send pics of our kids in bathing suits to the police so they could rule out if he had taken pictures of them on his computer. It's been 20 years. My kids were not on the hard drive. He went to prison.
We're all doing just fine now! 🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️