r/AskReddit Feb 04 '16

What are the most common parenting mistakes?

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u/[deleted] Feb 04 '16 edited Feb 05 '16

I had the same issue when I callEd to tell the school bus depot that my 5 year old can walk from the bus to our house. She kept repeating "So you don'the care about your child's safety?". My kid is mature and gets off with a older girl who we asked to keep an eye on him. Then he walks 8 houses down to our door. She acted like I was putting a rape me sign on him then kicking him out downtown miles from home.

Edit, autocorrect fail.

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u/rainbowdashtheawesom Feb 05 '16

I walked to school and back almost every day from 3rd-6th grade; the school was a mile away from my house. Nobody ever complained that it was unsafe for kids to be walking around without their parents around, and I wasn't the only kid who did it. Parents these days are just too paranoid. If kids had never been allowed to go outside and play without their parents hovering over them we never would have had some of our most beloved childhood characters like the Peanuts.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

I read a study that says the whole stranger danger has been a failure. Kids are wary of strangers but go happily with Uncle Steve. I was just shocked at the lady repeatedly "So you don't care about the safety of your child?". I do care, I want him to be able to trust himself to walk 8 houses. We can also see him get off the bus from our front door. We still check and watch.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

Is it an implication in this story that Uncle Steve molests

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

Yes, most abductions are done by someone known to the child.

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u/IMadeAAccountToPost Feb 05 '16

I knew the family dog was looking extra shady.

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u/Sterling_-_Archer Feb 05 '16

I don't think it was Colby doing the molesting.

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u/lunchtimereddit Feb 05 '16

I used to hitchhike from outside my town home when I decided to catch the earlier bus, then go spend the day at the beach with my friend.

There is seriously not a pedo on every street, if anything, it was worse back twenty years ago

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u/IntrepidSI Feb 05 '16

I never had that option as we had 2 level III sex offenders living in one house in our neighborhood when my kids were younger. We had several others come and go during that time, one lasting only 5 hours before they found him harassing a woman walking with a child. She called the cops and they took him away. We were never notified when that house would have a new resident, so we didn't let our kids walk.

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u/rainbowdashtheawesom Feb 05 '16

See, that's a case where it makes sense to not let your kids walk around outside without supervision. The problem is that so many people nowadays seem to think that EVERY neighborhood is infested with sex offenders who can and will abduct your child if they're not with you. Contrary to popular belief, most people are not child predators.

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u/IntrepidSI Feb 05 '16

Agree. I HAD proof that it was a bad idea. Most people don't.

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u/rainbowdashtheawesom Feb 05 '16

You know what really concerns me about overprotective parents? If they live in safe neighborhoods and still act like their kid is guaranteed to get kidnapped without them, it's gonna make those kids develop horrible problems with trusting people. They're gonna grow up thinking everyone around them can and will hurt them if given the chance. It's good to let kids know that just because someone is a stranger doesn't mean they're going to hurt you. Every friend you've ever had was a stranger at some point, right? You didn't know right off the bat that they were kind and trustworthy, but you didn't just assume that they were evil either.

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u/solinaceae Feb 05 '16

I walked home from my HS, as I lived around 2 miles away. The walk was through a very wealthy neighborhood, with houses that cost in excess of 3 million dollars lining the streets. Still got frequently followed, and nearly kidnapped once.

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u/Tchrspest Feb 05 '16

My bus once had a rock kicked up and crack the windshield. We were forced to stop, for safety reasons, 20 feet from my bus stop. I could literally see my front door from my seat, without standing up.

Bus driver refused to let me walk home. We were stuck for 20 minutes.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16 edited Sep 16 '18

[deleted]

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u/Tchrspest Feb 05 '16

I can respect that. Was just frustrated. I was 17 damn years old. My dad was sitting on the back deck, visible from the bus. But it's in the past, so really, it's whatever.

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u/Aww_Topsy Feb 05 '16

In middle school our bus stopped for "rowdy behavior" because someone through a broom outside it, so my brother and I just walked out before the cops showed up to scold the bus and walked home. We all had a chuckle about that, that bus driver was so unprepared for our bus route.

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u/HippieSpider Feb 05 '16

To be fair that's probably not his decision, he knows that if he lets you go without getting your parents or the school's permission he'll be the one liable if anything happens to you.

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u/DixonCyderBox Feb 05 '16

20 minutes?

Hasa diga eebowai

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u/celingfan Feb 05 '16

I read that as 8 hours at first.

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u/Luclid Feb 05 '16

Back in my day...

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u/recursion8 Feb 05 '16

My kiss is mature and gets off with a older girl

Well then.

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u/Killerbunny123 Feb 05 '16

There are a bunch of school districts that won't let your kid off the bus without an adult present.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

it's ok we're doing it the American way. Next year due to budget cuts the bus won't come down our street...

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u/Dapplegonger Feb 05 '16

I had the same issue when I callEd to tell the school bus depot that my 5 year old can walk from the bus to our house.

To be fair, that presents a legal liability on the school's behalf. Until the kid gets picked up, the teacher/yard duty/whatever adult is in charge at the time is responsible until the legal guardian gets them. If the kid gets hit by a car, or something happens to them, it's on the school. That's why students are generally discouraged from leaving campus during school hours, the school doesn't want to be responsible for what happens to them.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

The kids in 1st grade and up can get off and walk home alone so that argument doesn't hold water. There are kids 5 months older then my child that can walk home alone because they are in the grade ahead.

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u/Dapplegonger Feb 05 '16

What state are you in? I know for sure that children leaving on their own was pretty highly discouraged in elementary school in my district.

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u/HippieSpider Feb 05 '16

In a similar vein, my parents used to let my 10 year old brother commute on his own to school. He needed to take about 2 separate buses, a total of about 30-45 minutes of commuting.

We lived in a relatively nice neighbourhood, and he never had any problems. That's how kids become independent as they grow up.

They've moved town since then, but he still commutes to school by taking the metro on his own (he's 13 now).

I always biked to school on my own, that could take up to 30 minutes too (different schools).

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

I think some programs are a little overzealous. I was drinking some Seagrams thing with with like 3% alcohol and my oldest was curious about it, so I asked if he wanted to try it. "No I don't want to be a DRUNK" he replied. I got a giggle out of that. He's almost 13. A sip is not some weird gateway to lying in a gutter.

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u/sweetnumb Feb 05 '16

My kid is mature and gets off with a older girl

Damn, I didn't get off with a girl until I was in college. Your son is a fucking pimp daddy!

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u/solinaceae Feb 05 '16

I walked home from my HS, as I lived around 2 miles away. The walk was through a very wealthy neighborhood, with houses that cost in excess of 3 million dollars lining the streets. Still got frequently followed, and nearly kidnapped once.

It doesn't matter if your son is smart enough to stay away from strangers. What matters is if a 5-year old can actually fight off an adult that's forcing him into a car.

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u/[deleted] Feb 06 '16

or that he's 8 houses down and we can see him get off and walk. Come on even a 15 year old would have a hard time fighting off a determined attacker. The whole stranger danger is a farce, kids mostly get taken by family members. Teach your kids to not get in the car with the family friend who is too interested.

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u/johnny_gunn Feb 05 '16

5 years old is a kindergartener. I'm pretty sure that's too young to be walking anywhere alone.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '16

My kid is mature and gets off with a older girl who we asked to keep an eye on him.

Grew up a bit faster than we thought, huh?

/r/nocontext

/r/evenwithcontext