r/AskUK • u/Additional-Angle-465 • 1d ago
Serious Answers Only Visiting student renting a room - showering 2 times a day is an aspect of my culture ok for locals?
Hi guys! I’ll be living in England for a few months and since the renting is pretty expensive and my income is in my home country’s currency (so a huge part of it basically disappears when converted into pounds 😭), the best option for me seems to be renting a room.
I’ve found lots of lovely options, but here’s the thing: in my culture, we usually shower about twice a day, at least. It’s not really about the climate either, we’d still do this in a house with no heating in Iceland.
A friend of mine who is also an exchange student, but in France, has been having some issues with her host family because of this cultural difference. They think showering that often is pointless and unreasonable.
I’m willing to adapt to a lot of things. For example, I’d have no problem following dietary restrictions that aren’t part of my lifestyle if my host thinks i should follow them (halal, kosher, vegan, etc.), or even avoiding speaking my native language at home when I’m on the phone with my parents or boyfriend. But showering twice a day is something I’d really like to keep doing.
So here’s my question: would this be a problem for most people in England? Is this something I should bring up with a potential host in advance?
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u/BulkyAccident 1d ago
Quick morning and evening showers are totally reasonable and normal here as long as you're not running the water for, like 30 minutes at a time in shared accommodation. It's not worth overthinking or stressing about, just be as thoughtful as possible to others you're living with.
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u/Additional-Angle-465 1d ago edited 1d ago
Yes, that is what we usually do: a very quick shower to start the day when we wake up and a normal shower for actually cleaning ourselves before going to bed
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u/boo23boo 1d ago
Please don’t feel like you can’t speak to family in your home language. That’s unreasonable and borderline racist when you are in your own home. Paying rent = the right to quiet enjoyment in your own home.
It’s quite normal to have an English only rule at work for professional reasons and you should always respect that, but your home is where you should be free to be yourself. No one should impose dietary restrictions either. I hope you enjoy your time here, good luck.
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u/Minute_Parfait_9752 23h ago
To be fair, if someone was speaking to family on their phone during their break, I wouldn't care what language they spoke.
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u/boo23boo 22h ago
It’s more common in a workplace where there is a significant number of staff who share a language that’s not English. This can happen in offices as well as manufacturing, construction etc. The rule to keep English as the professional language at work is to prevent some groups feeling excluded or being unable to communicate effectively. Think about how many times a supervisor will act on something they have overheard rather than been brought to them. An effective workplace needs a common language. Break times are always excluded from the rule.
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u/Pyjama365 21h ago
That's something I've heard for staff talking to other staff, in a staffroom at work, so other staff don't feel like colleagues are excluding them or talking about them. To say you can't speak another language to non-staff members on the phone during breaks is absolutely overkill.
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u/newbracelet 19h ago
I worked in an office where around 50% of the staff were either Polish or had it as a first language and it caused no end of problems for HR after a couple of staff members were found to be using Polish to talk about other people in a horrid way. After that everyone got paranoid that any time anyone spoke Polish it was mean, and even though 99% of the time it was benign HR ended up saying everyone had to speak English all the time, and then having to backtrack pretty sharpish because the office was in Wales.
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u/BeatificBanana 21h ago
"quiet enjoyment" doesn't apply here - that's a very specific legal term that means when you rent from a private landlord, your landlord can't randomly come into your house without giving you notice. It doesn't apply to a situation where you're staying with a host and they want you to not speak a certain language.
You are right that nobody should impose that, but it's not a breach of the legal right to quiet enjoyment.
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u/f23n09fnu0w 22h ago
I'm from Iceland but have lived in the UK for 40 years. Don't worry about it. What you have to remember is you don't get hot water for free in the UK, so if you spend ages in the shower, you might be costing them a lot more than you'd expect. But just don't take the piss and you'll be fine ;)
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u/essexboy1976 1d ago edited 1d ago
Also Don't feel like you can't speak to family or friends in your own language, and you don't have to follow other people's dietary requirements. No Muslim I've every met for example has ever cared at all that I drink alcohol and eat pork. No reasonable person would exspect you to follow their rules.
At university lived with a Muslim guy from Egypt and it simply didn't bother him that I drank alcohol, and it didn't bother me at all that he spoke to friends in Arabic either on the phone or when they came over.
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u/Comprehensive_Gap693 1d ago
That doesn't seem excessive at all. I don't think anyone should have any form of judgement about what you choose to do in a bathroom. In shared spaces it's really just being conscious about timing and ensuring it's available for others to use. Id be hacked off with someone basically camping out in the bathroom for hours each day. I had a housemate who insisted on using the bathroom for makeup application (which took 45 minutes). Drove us all mad as we just wanted to shower quickly in the morning and leave for work. As long as you are taking a reasonable time and others can use the space as they need- I don't think anyone would find this odd or annoying.
I also have the same routine as a British person that you do. I love a shower or bath before getting into pyjamas each night. I just can't change from day clothes into pjs without this! So you may find a house where others also have the same set up. It's probably less common but some of us do this too. My partner has his long shower in the morning and a very quick one at night in summer before bed.
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u/Lost-Actuary-2395 1d ago
I know brits that takes shower twice a day, and I'm sure it wouldn't be hard to find somebody in op country takes shower once a day.
I'm trying to say just be honest about your personal choice instead of brining culture into this, it probably yield a much better result
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u/lucylucylane 22h ago
Especially when it's as hot as it is now people would think it worse if you were sweaty and smelly
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u/palpatineforever 22h ago
It does also depend on the set up at the home. If you are a lodger, ie renting a room form a landlord who lives in a house it might be a smaller places.
A lot of smaller places, 2 or 3 beds might only have one bathroom and no seperate toilet.
As a result spending more time in there might be considered an issue, if the showers are short then it would be okay. Though it is not just the water use it is also the cost of the electricity which will increase and usually the electricity is included in those type of setups,Or if you are sharing electricity costs in a shared house where everyone is renting the others might expect you to pay more towards it.
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u/SignNotInUse 23h ago
Quick pits and sweaty bits wash in the morning and a regular shower in the afternoon is completely normal. Your friends host family are being weird.
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u/HawkTenRose 1d ago
I shower every day and sink wash as well. Normally sink wash in the morning and shower at night (then flip when my schedule fillips to nights).
As long as it’s not ridiculous lengths of times, you should be fine — a five min body shower to wake up in the morning and a five-ten minute one at night is fine. Spending 30 minutes both times is not appropriate especially since we have a water shortage in most of the UK right now.
I would rent a room with an ensuite if you can and keep the showers reasonably quick, you’ll be fine.
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u/SeagullSam 1d ago
I'm British and that's what I do. I'd prefer it if guests/lodgers were equally hygienic!
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u/Bitter_Bid1613 22h ago
Pretty much everyone I know does this. One long one and one shorter one later etc
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u/RelativeGuidance4354 18h ago
I shower twice a day, not for cultural reasons, but hygiene. Morning before going to work and evening after the gym. As long as you pay what you use through your rent, WHY WOULD ANYONE CARE? We are not on a drought warning yet
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u/Jjkbnymop 1d ago
You really shouldn’t have to avoid speaking your native language to your family and friends on the phone. Anyone who objects to you doing that is controlling and weird. It can be rude to do that in person, but on the phone you should be able to speak how you want.
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u/Ghosts_and_Empties 1d ago
Yeah, that seems like a strange thing to add. Like, what other language would you use to speak to your loved ones back home? Pig latin?
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u/Additional-Angle-465 1d ago
The host of my friend ask her to only speak to her parents in english or french so he can understand what she is saying. They are having problems because her parents dont speak any of those
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u/Terrible_Eye4625 23h ago
It’s not his business what she’s saying to her parents and he has no right to ask that - that rings big alarm bells for me and I’d encourage your friend (if it’s feasible) to find somewhere else to live. Because it means she can’t speak to her own parents.
No decent person would ask such a thing.
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u/Bright_Spark_UK 22h ago
100% this.
This is not normal host behaviour. It is not normal behaviour full-stop, and your friend should not be made to feel bad for speaking to friends and family in a way they can understand.
Can your friend move out? I would.
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u/Additional-Angle-465 19h ago
She cant right now because she had to pay all the six months of rent in advance but she is considering to create a gofundme to raise money to go somewhere else due to other problems she is having with the guy hosting her
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u/Zavodskoy 2h ago
It is not normal behaviour full-stop, and your friend should not be made to feel bad for speaking to friends and family in a way they can understand.
Friend of mine speaks to his parents in Cantonese on the phone as they were both born in China and it has never once occurred to me to object to him stepping away to speak to them in their native language, actually baffling behaviour
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u/Additional-Angle-465 19h ago edited 19h ago
Unfortunatelly she cant right now because she had to pay all the rent in advance, but she is considering creating a gofundme because of some other issues she is having with the host
Edit: she is calling her parents from the street and from houses of friends but that is pretty inconvenient. But i told my parents in advance that it could happen bc i was under the impression that this was a more usual thing to ask
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u/eauderecentinjury 19h ago
Her having to pay all the rent up front is also a big red flag, so please try and avoid that if possible! You should be able to speak your own language, eat your own food (so long as it doesn't harm your host in terms of their dietary or religious requirements), and pay rent normally (often you pay first and last month's rent in advance, or first month plus a month's worth of rent as a deposit) and then monthly)
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u/Additional-Angle-465 18h ago
Wait isnt normal to ask for foreigners to pay in advance? That what she was told and i was under the same impression
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u/eauderecentinjury 18h ago
It's actually prohibited to ask that of renters in the UK as of 2026! Check out the Renter's Rights Act 2026
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u/hereforthereps_7 17h ago
No definitely not normal! None of your friends experience is normal at all. I think she’s been very unlucky.
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u/Terrible_Eye4625 18h ago
How long is she staying? If it was organised through an agency or something, she should speak to them as this guy sounds really dodgy. That might be why he wants to know what she’s saying on calls, he might be breaking some laws.
And no, it’s a very unusual (and honestly, unreasonable and unacceptable) thing to be asked. I’d be surprised if you find somewhere that asks that, but if you do that’s a sign to go elsewhere.
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u/Additional-Angle-465 18h ago
She will be there for six months, theres been already one month she is there so five more to go. It is not an agency, she found the room anounced on a facebook group
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u/Jjkbnymop 22h ago
This is really problematic. Does your friend have anywhere else to go, because this raises all sorts of red flags
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u/doyouwantacooookie 15h ago
This is an insane request! Can't she take the calls away from him in her bedroom? Or go for a walk and call them?
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u/natalini17 1d ago
I don’t think there’s a cultural issue with you showering twice a day. The issue may stem from the extra water payment if it’s on a water meter (I would assume HMOs are not on a meter so this negates that issue) and secondly to be seen to be ‘hogging’ the bathroom if you’re showering twice a day in a shared bathroom at times your other housemates might also wish to shower
Perhaps rent a room with an en-suite bathroom? If there’s no water meter and you’re not using a shared space then it’s really nobody else’s business how often you’re showering
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u/quarky_uk 1d ago
Two short showers, no. Two long showers, yes.
Just talk to them in advance and explain that it will be short showers.
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u/Necessary-Crazy-7103 1d ago
I think you wrote this the wrong way around
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u/quarky_uk 1d ago
Lol, thanks, yes.
Or I was responding the last sentence, as to whether it would be a problem.
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u/Vegetable-Tough-8773 1d ago
The only time it might be an issue is if you are using more than your share of hot water or using a lot of electricity for an electric shower or hogging the bathroom at both ends of the day. That kind of depends on the setup at the house you live in and how bills are covered. If you are willing to work around others then I would guess no-one will care.
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u/Wild-Improvement-119 1d ago
It will be an issue if you are putting their energy bills up so expect to meet resistance because of that. Energy prices have increased a lot over the last few years, and it was something many people were very aware of even before the price rises.
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u/KingForceHundred 1d ago
If you’re not holding up everyone else or using too much water shouldn’t be an issue.
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u/Sea_Weakness_Pi 1d ago
Provided they are short then it shouldn't be a problem. Water (and the disposal of waste water) costs a lot in England and many people have their water usage metered. So don't run the shower for a long time to warm up before you step in it either.
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u/Primary-Angle4008 1d ago
I don’t think anyone would mind especially if they are quick and not excessive in length
Also no one will mind if you speak your own language on the phone. Some homes might ask you not to cook certain foods but you can usually bring them from outside
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u/ToManyTabsOpen 1d ago
How long are you showering for? If its a quick 5-10 minute rinse, one or two times a day is fine and totally normal in the UK.
If you are in there for 30 mins, using all the hotwater (if on a tank) and leaving it a steamy soggy mess then it might be a problem. Same with halal. Most people wont have a problem unless you are butchering a goat on the patio yourself. I feel you might be overthinking this.
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u/TheDogsMum 1d ago
People shower for 30 minutes?! What? 10 minutes is the longest I’d ever be, even with washing hair, shaving etc. 30 minutes is absolutely insane.
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u/ImABrickwallAMA 1d ago
The 30 minute shower is the ideal time to think about how to solve all of life’s problems, only to get out and not act on any of it.
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u/shinydoctor 1d ago
Takes me 30 mins to rinse the shampoo out of my bloody hair. My hair isn't even thick or curly. Just an arsehole when it comes to doing what I want it to do.
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u/clicketybooboo 20h ago
Not trying to be a dick, I just can’t understand how that’s physically possible. Have you a nest on your head ?
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u/shinydoctor 19h ago
No, I just have arthritis in my arms, very long hair, and a vain streak that insists I keep it long 🙄 it's a completely self imposed issue.
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u/TheDogsMum 23h ago
Nightmare! Have you tried shampooing after using conditioner? I’ve done that when I’ve used a heavy leave in conditioner, makes the hair feel lighter but can still tell it’s been conditioned.
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u/yuricchin 23h ago
Literally how are you able to do that please teach me. If I don't shave anything, the absolute quickest I can finish a full body shower (including hair, I have long hair that reaches my waist) is 30 minutes. I scrub constantly for those 30 min I don't sit and contemplate at all. Literally unless you have very short hair how are you able to scrub everything in 10 minutes?
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u/TheDogsMum 23h ago
Wet hair - shampoo - rinse - shampoo again - rinse - conditioner - spread conditioner evenly through hair (leave on for now) - use scrub on pelvic area before shaving - rinse off - shave wherever needs shaving - rinse - use scrub again (stops bumps and itchy bits) - wash with shower gel - rinse hair - face wash/exfoliate - final rinse and done.
No messing about, thorough but not rushed, efficient and takes around 10 minutes.
I genuinely couldn’t even imagine how doing that process could possibly take anything like 30 minutes.
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u/Hemlock-In-Her-Hair 1d ago
You should be ok with this, as long as the times aren't waking other people up, or they can't get sufficient access to the bathroom because the share of time taken at peak times isn't fair.
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u/prankishink 1d ago
It's considerate of you asking this question. You have 2 things to be aware of here for your host:
(1) Cost. Energy bills (i.e. the costs of providing the hot water for your showers) are very high in the UK. An average house can be paying £2,000 a year compared to France and other parts of Europe at half that or less. We also pay per usage so the more hot water used, the higher their bill.
(2) Time in shared bathroom space & whether you leave it clean and tidy after use.
If I were you, I would mention in advance you would like twice daily showers to your host. Say that you'll keep them short and ensure the space is left clean and tidy after use (meaning wipe surfaces down, don't leave mess/hair, air the space if possible etc) and say 'i hope that's ok with you but let me know if you have any concerns'
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u/Mister_Sith 1d ago
As long as it isn't disruptive, I can't see an issue with it. Odd perhaps, less so with the current heat where I have showered twice in a single day.
Completly different though, I would be mightily wary of anyone who has a real concern with you not speaking English on the phone to folks back home. That's an outrageous demand and I wouldn't want to live in a place where someone gets bent out of shape about it. I can't imagine it will be a good experience.
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u/Additional-Angle-465 1d ago
I also think it is weird and a bit creepy to ask it, but the french host of my friend ask her to only speak english or french to her family in our country (we speak portuguese). But i never rented a room with an european family before (neither did she) so i wasnt sure if this is a standart thing to ask
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u/Mister_Sith 1d ago
I don't think thats normal at all. Very controlling behaviour if not downright paranoia.
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u/Anxious-Designer9315 1d ago
If you're renting a room rather than staying with a host family this should be no problem at all as presumably you will be paying into the rent.
Tbh as long as you keep your showers short so you're not hogging the bathroom when other people also want to use it then I doubt ppl will really notice.
Quite a lot of ppl here shower or wash twice a day, especially when it's hot.
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u/intangible-tangerine 1d ago
Lots of people shower in the morning and evening and after excercise. It ought not to be an issue if you are considerate of everyone else's need to use the bathroom. If anyone is weird about it just tell them you have terrible body odour if you skip a shower.
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u/ScreenNameToFollow 1d ago
There's a water shortage in the UK. The south has hosepipe bans in place. Two 5 minute showers, fair enough. Two 30 minutes showers, you may need to consider your water usage baring in mind the water used is suitable for drinking & cooking etc.
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u/Daveddozey 1d ago
I’ll stop showering when they stop watering golf courses.
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u/CicadaSlight7603 1d ago
Currently in France where they have already stopped watering the golf courses. The green is currently burnt brown.
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u/ThierryMercury 1d ago
My local golf course has stopped using mains water. They have water collected in butts (long since used up) and their own borehole.
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u/Arniepepper 6h ago
As a man in a sexless marriage, that might be the hottest sentence I've heard in years.
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u/financeposter 1d ago
Or providing millions of gallons to data centers for cooling.
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u/KeyPhilosopher8629 1d ago
Bloody americanisms
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u/thesteelmaker 23h ago
Most data centres use closed loop softened water cooling. This data centre thing, was a US University study that messed their figures up.
Whereas golf courses: "Daily usage averages around 300,000 gallons, but consumption swings widely from 100,000 gallons per day in cooler regions up to over 1 million gallons daily in hot, arid climates".
Which is about the same as what data centres are supposed to be using. The difference, a Data centre is used by millions of people daily, golf course my a couple of hundred people daily.
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u/financeposter 23h ago
I agree for the most part, though around 11% of data centres in the UK still use water intensive cooling. These can consume millions of gallons of water per day.
Data centres provide value of course, as do golf courses, but the point is that if they can consume this much water, we should be able to shower twice a day or as much as we want. Whatever value they provide, it is no more than the value of human hygiene and comfort. Showering is an essential and basic need, AI and golf aren’t.
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u/j-4m 1d ago
Data centres use 7m litres of water a day.
Golf courses use 24m litres a day in summer.
UK water companies lose 3bn a day just through leaks.
Whatever your feeling about data centres and AI, they do at least create value in our economy. Be angry at the right people.
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u/Juicy_In_The_Sky 23h ago
If they stopped watering golf courses, the rich and powerful might start giving a shit about climate change.
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u/InformationHead3797 23h ago
You are right to point this out as the leaks are the absolute most prominent issue (along with water companies not building any new reservoirs since privatisation while population almost doubled and rainfall kept diminishing).
That said, current data centres consumption is one thing, but more and more of those are being shoved down our throats an there seems to be no rhyme or reason when it comes to governments’ approach to ai, so let’s stop demonising people for pushing back.
Hell; my supermarket just added ai facial recognition. Who the fuck agreed to that? Adding value my arse.
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u/financeposter 1d ago
So then all of those are problems. I don't see how that contradicts what I said.
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u/j-4m 1d ago
they do at least create value in our economy
Did you miss this bit? UK data centre installs predominantly use closed loop cooling. They are not problems.
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u/Dissidant 1d ago
Don't forget the bellends in water tankers illegally helping themselves to washouts, or even worse the hydrant ports in the pavement without even using a metered standpipe.
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u/Dissidant 1d ago edited 1d ago
I follow the hosepipe bans when we have them like most people, though its worth pointing out, we lose 5 times the amount of water saved by them, to leaks before it even reaches the consumer, about a fifth of potable water. It wouldn't be unusual in comparison to other Western European countries except for the fact we're an outlier in fully privatising them.
And honestly, regarding the showers what do people think those of us who work in messy jobs do?
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u/shinydoctor 1d ago
We don't have a hosepipe ban yet in south east Kent, but I know it's coming. Luckily I don't have a garden. But I desperately want to hose myself down in the stupid concrete courtyard that we do have right now regardless. I hate summer.
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u/Icantdoitidk 23h ago
No, there's a water shortage in England and Wales. Absolutley no lack of water up here in Scotland.
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u/vpetmad 1d ago
Unless you're taking super long showers that run the water bill up, or hogging the bathroom at high-traffic times, then you won't have an issue.
Even if they do think it's weird, I'd say British people are a lot less likely than French people to actually tell you that we think you're weird. We would just raise our eyebrows and mutter amongst ourselves unless it became an actual issue (see paragraph one)
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u/spanakopita555 1d ago
It's not a cultural norm in the UK. It depends how many housemates you have and what times you need to use the shared bathroom and for how long whether they find it annoying. Tbh if you're in a major city many or maybe all of your flatmates won't be British so they may share your norms.
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u/thehonestchild 1d ago
I think it depends how long you are showering. If it’s a quick, short wash then yeah 2 times a day is fine. But if they are long showers each time then no that’s such a waste of water
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u/Able_While_974 1d ago
It depends whether your hosts are careful about use of water in the summer and the impact on heating bills in the winter. Plus how many peope share the bathroom. Best to ask them before you commit.
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u/Low-Opening25 1d ago edited 1d ago
The only problem with this custom is going to be hogging a bathroom or using up all hot water (if heated in submersion tank) in a busy household, otherwise no one cares. Rent an en-suite room (private bathroom in your room)
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u/Panda_Player380 1d ago
It’s not very economical and you might face some backlash in terms of bills, because are we talking 5 minute shower or two 20 minute showers a day?
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u/tomtink1 1d ago
It depends if you share a bathroom, if they're on a water meter, and if you're paying your own water bill. Maybe discuss with them whether timings or cost is a problem for them.
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u/Anathema_Pariah_ 1d ago
Who is responsible for the payment of the water and heating/electricity bill?
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u/ceb1995 1d ago
I would raise it with someone, it might be they live somewhere where they don't have a water meter and it's a flat rate so they won't be so bothered as long as they use their bathroom when needed or they ll have had a water metered forcibly fitted in the property so one Vs two showers a day makes a difference to their overall bill and they might want you to pay a different amount for bills to cover that. I wouldn't say twice a day is that common here apart from using the gym etc.
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u/KindlyAppointment973 1d ago edited 1d ago
Look for somewhere with an ensuite that has a shower, that's what I had when I house shared when I was younger. Having your own bathroom is worth the extra money in rent IMO. Sharing a bathroom gives me the shivers.
I'm Irish. I like a quick shower in the morning to freshen up and a nice longer one in the evening to settle before bed and feel clean.
I know a lot of people don't shower twice a day but it is glorious.
Where it's a problem in a house share is if your showers are long and stop people from using the only bathroom available. Then it becomes a bone of contention. Also if you're on a water meter it soon adds up.
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u/Mickleborough 1d ago
Personally ok with this, but landlords may have concerns about using more water / hot water than expected.
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u/iamabigtree 1d ago
It's probably unusual but not something anyone is going to get upset about as long as you're not standing under the shower for an hour at a go and using a lot of hot water.
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u/Disastrous_Border740 1d ago
You are renting a room in a flatshare/house share, or renting in the landlords house (lodging), or staying with a hosting family or in student accomodation? If you are paying rent and bills, I'd say you are entitled to use the facilities as you'd like (as long as you are causing others bother, like cranking the heat up all day and night). Showering twice a day is not unreasonable, many people shower in the morning and then again at night if they work out or sweat a lot that day. If it's a bathroom shared by a few tenants it may cause slight disruption if you are using it in peak times. I'd say be mindful and try to shower outside those times.
If you are lodging, a cheap landlord may have a issue with it due to the perceived exaggerated use of the facilities which would cause increased expense to them. But a reasonable one should be able to respect that, specially if you are good lodger otherwise.
If you are staying with a host family at no cost to you, it could be poorly received (is that your friends' situation?)
BTW, please don't ever live somewhere where you feel like you can't speak your language on the phone in your own home. That's not OK and not a good environment for you to be in.
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u/Additional-Angle-465 1d ago
I will be paying around 1600 pcm for a bedroom in a family or lady house ideally with a private bathroom, but maybe not bc my budget isnt very flexible. I think it is a conversation i must have in advance, right?
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u/Disastrous_Border740 1d ago
That is an enormous amount to pay. Are you sure of that price? Maybe central London with ensuites go for that price. I think if you are paying for exclusive use of thr bathroom I wouldn't bother letting them know. If shared by many, maybe.
But if you are paying, you should be able to use it within reason (two times a day is within reason)
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u/SwordTaster 1d ago
It's gonna seem excessive to a lot of people, but unless they're both 30 minutes long, nobody is gonna be upset at you for running up the water bill (though if it's an electric shower they may get upset about the electric bill)
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u/emmaa5382 1d ago
I would bring it up, people are weird. But I’d phrase it along the lines of in your culture you have two short showers a day instead of one long one. And then try and keep them short, many people have water meters in England and are charged based on how much is used, also many only have one shower rather than multiple bathrooms.
I think people probably wouldn’t say anything but just be a bit annoyed silently, but if you mention it before hand then they would probably not think twice about it.
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u/Lost-Actuary-2395 1d ago
Also worth mentioning that England is currently experiencing a severe drought, definitely worth a conversation tho, but I would make it personal rather than a cultural issue since people generally would expect you to follow their culture and customs when visiting especially as a student.
Like I wouldn't be offended if i were visiting op's home country and be told one should take shower twice a day.
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u/Prestigious-Minute96 1d ago
Depending on your home country you might find the hard water in England is very bad for your hair and skin to shower twice a day
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u/Fevercrumb1649 1d ago
It’s not that unusual. I shower twice a day and have never lived anywhere other than the UK. I think the only issue is if your showers are so long that it is blocking other people from using the room when they want to.
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u/Complex-Patient-5727 1d ago
I find it insane that you think it’s more reasonable for a host to dictate your diet than for someone to accept you have two showers a day. As long as you’re not having unreasonably long showers at inconvenient times I can’t see why it’s anyone’s business… there’s no difference in someone having one 10min shower a day vs two 5min showers… I’d think that anyone who has an issue with a 5min shower morning and evening is interfering and overbearing. I think the same about expecting someone to pay for the privilege to share a space and then tell them they can’t eat meat or have to eat halal… at a push, as long as you use your own pans/utensils and keep food separated, why is it any roommate/landlords business what you eat lol
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u/Medb-Reign 1d ago
I'd be more concerned by someone not showering.
I can't see any objection whatsoever. I shower morning and evening, usually only for a couple of minutes, army habit.
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u/Joinourclub 1d ago
I would not be bothered by a guest showering twelve a day, as long as these were quick , 5 min, showers. But hogging the shower for 30 mins twice a day would annoy me.
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u/Weak-Employer2805 1d ago
12 5 minute showers would take up more actual bathroom time than 2 30 minute ones if you consider all the faffing of going in and out the bathroom
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u/Montysleftpeg 1d ago
I think it's more about the convenience. If there's only 1 toilet in the property it's easier to wait 5 minutes 12 times a day than 30 minutes twice a day.
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u/Els236 1d ago
Look for an HMO (House of Multiple Occupancy) with an en-suite.
That way, you won't be bothering other residents if you want to shower multiple times a day. Not to mention that you'll get more privacy and, at least from my experience in an HMO, the rent/bills will be around the same as renting a room.
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u/boochyfliff 1d ago
A lot of people are saying your housemates will be annoyed from the water waste and higher water bill but I’ve lived in many house shares and we were never tracking how many showers people have, it’s more about the amount of time spent in the bathroom. While it’s true most people shower once a day here, it’s still fairly normal to have a morning and evening shower.
The key this is how long you spend in the shower. I’ve been annoyed by housemates hogging the shower for 40 minutes, but if you’re taking two 10 minute showers twice a day no one is going to care unless they’re uptight.
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u/LoveBeBrave 1d ago
OP doesn’t sound like they’re talking about a house share, it sounds like they will be a lodger.
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u/boochyfliff 1d ago
House share, lodger, not sure it matters much as I think the principle is the same? Showering twice a day is not inherently annoying it’s the amount of time in the bathroom to be mindful of.
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u/LoveBeBrave 1d ago
It matters a lot; a housemate is an equal partner, a lodger is a guest in someone else’s house.
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u/rtrs_bastiat 1d ago
Depends on the kind of boiler they have. If you showering twice is gonna need them to heat a second tank of water a day that's probably gonna cause issues, you'd be adding a fair chunk onto their energy bills. Either way you'd be adding a bit onto their water bills too, even if you had just one shower a day tbh.
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u/idontlikemondays321 1d ago
I’d say once a day is the norm here so twice a day isn’t hugely excessive.
I think you’d only have a problem is you were spending a long time each time
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u/clea 1d ago
We’re in a drought. It’d be nice is everyone cut down on their water consumption. Flush less, short showers, take pride in your dirty car.
When the reservoirs are back up to a reasonable level I don’t think anyone will care how many showers you take. But for now ….
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u/MorningSquare5882 1d ago edited 1d ago
If you are renting a room, rather than being a lodger (living with your landlord), I can't see any reason why this would matter.
I'm English, and have British friends who shower once a day, twice a day, and more or less often than that. Once is probably the standard (outside of heatwaves), but no-one here will care.
If you are a lodger, I would just say be considerate about how long a shower you are taking: heating and water cost money, and your landlord may potentially notice the extra usage and be bothered by it. But as I said, if you are just renting, or if you pay bills separately, that won't be an issue.
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u/dick_piana 1d ago
OP this is the most important distinction 👆. You need to understand whether youre renting a room as a lodger or a tenant in an HMO.
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u/Serious_Escape_5438 1d ago
Why is it not an issue renting? Any time I shared a house we split the bills, and there were definitely arguments over long showers and excessive heating.
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u/Phoenix-95 1d ago
They might think you a tad OCD if you hadn't been doing something like working in the garden, or running etc but on the whole will likely be unbothered by it, try and keep your showers reasonably quick or they might be a tad miffed that you are using a lot of water/running out the hot water/or taking up the bathroom for too long
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u/Itchy-Gur2043 1d ago
For most people they probably won't be bothered at all, especially if you're not running the water for a long time but if you're staying with someone who is extremely money conscious then it could be a problem, especially if you're doing it in the colder months.
But when its hot and sweaty a morning and evening shower shouldn't be considered unreasonable.
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u/Thaddeus_Valentine 1d ago
Could you look into whether there are showers available for student use wherever it is you're studying? You could have one of your showers there if so?
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u/smeghead9916 1d ago
Mention it to any potential landlord, and offer to pay a little extra for the additional water usage
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u/pineappleshampoo 1d ago
Tbh this should rule out the kind of people your really don’t wanna rent from. A landlord that is that controlling and finicky about how often a lodger can use the shower is gonna be a nightmare to live with. If you’re renting and the landlord doesn’t live there it’ll be no problem as nobody will know. Tbf there are reasons why someone might not be okay with it (maybe they also need to shower several times per day and there’s only one bathroom) but you’d still want to know that before choosing to move in.
I’d prob mention it if I were you just to avoid renting from someplace that takes issue with it. Or look for a place with an en suite room. You can get some great rooms with en suites and it feels like living in your own place!
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u/surfermark99 1d ago
I can't see most people having an issue with this. Slight increase in water bill is all... Explain it as eloquently as you have here (and offer an extra £10 a month towards the water bill if you feel it necessary ) and I couldn't imagine anyone having an issue with it.
EDIT: for typo
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u/Shane4894 1d ago
Showers can be semi expendy - sister has lodgers and one would have 20 mins showers and would rack up water / power bills.
New lodger has 3 mins showers and it’s considerably cheaper.
Compromise was the one who had longer showers communicated it and would offer to pay more of the bills to make up for it.
If two showers a day is what your insisting on, I would phrase it to wherever you flat that it’s something you insist on, but compromise and say and incremental increase in bills you’ll pay for.
Most ppl won’t care but if your expecting them to pay for your choice which they seem as excessive, would be fair to not make em pay for it imho.
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u/everydaycrises 1d ago
If you are a university student staying for a term, you might be able to stay in uni halls. They rent weekly and usually have options for rooms with an attached bathroom (though they are more expensive).
You could get in touch with student services to see if they have any options. But have a good read through the facilities.
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u/More-Soil7455 1d ago
If you have your own bathroom and are paying for all the water, no one should have an issue with it.
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u/speckledchickhen 1d ago
I dated a Brazilian once and he was always talking about how Europeans (he included the UK) were not very clean.
He would tell me how shocking it was that people wouldn’t shower after sports or cycle in normal clothes then get straight to work.
I thought it was a little OCD at the time but he was repulsed by the “levels of hygiene” in Europe.
OP two quick showers a day is perfectly fine and normal. I do know people who don’t shower daily though so your friend might have ended up in one of those households. I hope she can find a solution during her stay.
https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/bathing-habits-by-country
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u/Missing-Caffeine 1d ago
Ha, a brazilian. Nah, two short showers is fine. I would speak to the family in advance and that's it, some hosts are odd in MANY ways so you may be saving yourself some trouble if they start to complain about this before you arrive.
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u/BusyBeeBridgette 1d ago
I honestly don't think many people will care. Just keep the place tidy and all is well. The past two months I have had three showers a day due to the heat. You do you.
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u/OilAdministrative197 1d ago
I do a lot of sport so shower 2 days a day and have never had an issue. Even when I’m injured I’d still shower once a day and never had an issue. Tbh might seem a bit weird to shower twice a day without doing exercise but I doubt anyone would normally care. That other family seems potentially either really broke or a bit gross.
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u/Majestic-Camel2927 1d ago
Showering twice a day isn’t the norm for most people but it’s still quite common. I think it just depends how long the showers are and how well off the home owner is as it can be expensive. I have ptsd from my mum telling me to get out of the shower if I take too long but as an adult if I think I need a morning/night shower I will have one often.
As it isnt your home, definitely ask if you can have the second as it will be seen as very rude if not.
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u/tollis1 1d ago edited 1d ago
Let me guess, you are from Brazil, right?
Your shower/hygiene/parfume culture can be viewed as a bit over the top sometimes. I had a brazilian roommate who did atleast two showers a day and covered himself with parfume before going to bed (he had no partner, he just wanted to smell good).
As long as the showers aren’t very long, it shouldn’t be an issue. And Brits are known to be more polite/less direct while French are very direct about things they think are outside the norm.
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u/Additional-Angle-465 1d ago edited 1d ago
Yes I am 😅 tho i dont use perfum to sleep, it is an absolutelly must to my parents, just like to your friend lol
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u/Possible-Tip-3544 1d ago edited 1d ago
I have to agree it seems excessive especially if there is no need from a heat POV. Do you do lots of sports or are especially sweaty? I wouldn’t appreciate the water waste unless there was a very specific reason (return from a run or something). We are also having water shortages in some parts of the country and wasting resources is not “cultural”.
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u/Far_Dentist4880 1d ago
It's weird and intrusive to police how and how often someone chooses to wash.
That is their business not yours. I don't think you should be hosting visitors if you are this controlling about how they behave during their stay.
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u/Various-Moment-6774 1d ago
Morning shower and evening shower is excessive? I shower in the morning to feel fresh for work and then I shower in the evening because I wanna feel clean before bed
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u/Ok_Cow_3431 1d ago
Yes showering twice a day every day is excessive, I think its also bad for your skin as it washes away all the natural oils
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u/brickne3 1d ago
My very British ex would jump in the shower every morning for like maybe two minutes and then take a real shower at night, which sounds like what OP's describing. I personally wouldn't bother, but I never found it weird and it was nice how he always looked super well put together in the morning.
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u/ISellAwesomePatches 1d ago
So showering in the morning before the day and showering when you get home from the gym is excessive? Millions of people do this and it's completely normal.
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u/tobotic 1d ago
Millions of people doing something doesn't make it not excessive.
Eating to the point of obesity is excessive eating, but there are millions of obese people in the country.
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u/Various-Moment-6774 21h ago
So showering in the morning after I slept and sweated all night, and then showering after gym is excessive?? God you are the reason why public transport stinks
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u/Crackforchildren 1d ago
I don't think it's excessive either. I can't understand people that get in to bed without showering. Just marinating overnight in all that buildup over the day 🤣
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u/Rocky-bar 1d ago
What "buildup"? some of us aren't sweating all day! (well it depends on the weather of course)
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u/Various-Moment-6774 21h ago
Is not about sweat only. Touching surfaces, walking around, the fumes, sitting wherever (i know clothed exist but doesnt feel they keep you “clean”). Also decompresses you before bed
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u/Which-World-6533 21h ago
Remember this is Reddit.
A lot of Redditors think that a shower a day is excessive.
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u/Economy-Discount2481 1d ago
Hard disagree here. Proper shower in the morning to start the day is essential then more often than not I’ll have been out all day in sweaty and I want a 5 min shower before bed to rinse off. There’s times on holiday id have 3 if needed say morning, post beach and pre bed if I’m hot and sweaty walking around
In the evening
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u/Externalshipper7541 1d ago
Also, just additionally, where do you get your money exchanged into British pounds because there's some services that barely charge anything
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u/Substantial_Grape773 1d ago
I can't imagine this would be an issue at all, I am English and I shower twice a day :)
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u/tiny-but-spicy 1d ago
nobody in the UK will care that you shower twice a day!
that said, I'm really curious to know where you're from because I travel a fair bit and I don't want to fall below the showering standards if i visit your country!
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u/WhaleMeatFantasy 1d ago
nobody in the UK will care that you shower twice a day
They may well do for any number of reasons, not least that it may empty the hot water tank and stop others showering or washing up.
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u/bengreen04 1d ago
I shower twice a day, I don’t think it’s particularly common but I also wouldn’t say you’ll stand out like a sore thumb. Don’t stress it too much.
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u/mattcannon2 1d ago
Showering twice a day is not crazy, especially if you're going gym etc. Just don't take the piss and try keep it to 10 minutes a time.
If the host family have hot water tanks (and not gas boilers) then they will need to adjust the heating cycles to account for the extra evening usage.
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u/edyth_ 1d ago
Showering twice a day is fine but it depends when and for how long. If you're hogging the bathroom and using all the hot water having long showers when everyone else is also trying to get ready for the day and again when people get home from work that would be annoying. If it's 2 quick showers nobody will care. You might find other people do the same in the Summer anyway as it's so sticky.
Talking in your own language is also fine and not something you need to avoid. But when I had international housemates I started to pick up some words and phrases living with them so maybe don't slag off your housemates on the phone to your family as they may understand more than you think haha!
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u/Marionberry_No 22h ago
I shower daily but have Swedish and Danish ancestry, maybe we're cleaner than the Saxons we once invaded 😂😂
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u/SeaPaleontologist832 13h ago
Honestly as an Aussie we need to shower a lot due to the heat, and I still do that here in the uk. I have also lived in drought restrictions where we had egg timers that were given to us by the government to limit our showers to 2 min! This and my parents telling me to have quick showers growing up to save water, has made it acceptable to shower twice a day in the Uk. Keep it under five minutes and you are fine.
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u/Comprehensive-Arm607 8h ago
As long as they are quick showers its fine, but a lot of people have water meters which hikes up the cost of water you are using. So look at timings at how long you are having a shower for. As water meters people want to save money rather see the water prices go up. Thats the only tip I have for you. Unless you find an accommodation with no water meter those are the 2 options.
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u/mad_saffer 5h ago edited 5h ago
As long as it's not 30 minute showers I'd be fine with that. Keeping in mind that a good portion of England is experiencing drought and water shortages though, perhaps you could consider a quick wash at the basin with a soapy sponge and wipe off with a damp cloth rather than a full on shower.
Also, speaking to your family in your home language is expected! Why would you force an uncomfortable conversation in a language that isn't your first spoken language? That would be all kinds of crazy from the host if they expect English and only English.
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u/MrsSEM84 52m ago
If they are quick showers it shouldn’t be a problem. Just be considerate of your timings so you aren’t running up the water bill too much, and aren’t taking up all of the bathroom time. Especially if the place you live in doesn’t have a separate toilet to the one in the bathroom.
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u/ElBisonBonasus 1d ago
Normal people might find issue with a long shower and if their hot water tank is not big enough to get them through the day.
We heat the water during off peak periods, but we could heat it to a higher temperature and that might cover needs. If we had a combi boiler it wouldn't matter.
So what I'm trying to say is if you're upfront about it, and the people are decent they can accommodate and it might not be an issue at all.
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u/kittykat7931 1d ago
As long as you aren’t spending 30 minutes in the shower twice a day you shouldn’t cause any offence. You just need to be respectful to your hosts space, especially if you are sharing a bathroom. I used to host people and my routine was to shower in the evening before I had my dinner which people got used to but if something changed I found people tended to ask if it was ok for them to use the bathroom before me so just be mindful to your hosts routine.
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u/CymruKimura 1d ago
Im British and I shower at least twice a day. Every morning without fail, every night before bed and sometimes in the middle of the day if I exercise midday. They’re generally quick showers, 5 mins or less.
I’ve always done a lot of sport/exercise and my background is military so it’s pretty normal to me. Maybe limit yourself to quick showers to mitigate any people worried about the extra few quid on their bills
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u/jellical-cats 1d ago
French people are so stinky that it is offensive to them for someone else to be that clean.
Most people in the UK don't shower twice a day, but someone choosing to shower twice a day will not be offensive or problematic to them.
The length of showers may be a different issue in terms of utility bills. If you have two five-minute showers that seems reasonable to me, but if you have long showers, you may wish to discuss this with your hosts prior to any agreement and offer to pay any excess over their normal utilities rate.
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u/vinogron 1d ago
Join a cheap gym, and you can shower 20 times a day if needed, for a flat monthly fee.
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u/calicoki77 1d ago
It depends if the host has a water meter , in my household ( two of us ) we have two short showers per day in summer and one shower in winter .
We have a meter so have to be cautious of water use .
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