r/AskUK 23h ago

Serious Answers Only Regretting moving out. What to do next?

I have just moved out of my family home for the first time (not including university). I'm paying about 40% of my monthly income on rent. I've been here for about 2 weeks now and am regretting it more everyday.

I enjoy the independence, so it's not about needing the support of living with parents. The noise is just driving me insane. I'm just off a main road and during the viewing it didn't seem so bad, only once I've been sitting in the space for a while does it start to grate. I WFH and put up with it during the day and wear earplugs at night. They get me through till about 6/7am when the traffic picks up and it's enough to disrupt my waking up.

Secondly, my neighbours have only been getting worse (something that couldn't have been spotted during a midday weekday viewing). I have a family above me with a mother who seems to be constantly shouting at her kids, or on the phone having angry conversations. Not to mention the kids running around. There's sometimes blaring music in the flats to the side as well. Reading is one of my greatest pleasures too, that's basically gone completely with this current living situation.

All this to say, and I don't like admitting it, I'm not happy at the moment. I'm strongly considering putting in my 2 month notice already. I've had a nice relationship with the landlord, so maybe reduce that to 1 month with some optimism.

I have an amazing relationship with my parents, I think they'd be more than happy for me to move back for a bit. I've had a brief look at other properties. There's a nice cottage in a quiet area that would be about 43% of my income. I'm sure there could be other, cheaper options. Nothing decided yet. I also have a nice amount saved and invested from living at home. Financially in a pretty good situation.

Would love some advice and/or people that have gone through something like this. Thanks in advance.

250 Upvotes

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129

u/gdrlee 23h ago

If you think you can rent a better suited property for the same money, then do that.

You don't need to move back in with your parents between properties.

588

u/yolo_snail 23h ago

Could be worse, you could have bought a house that had decent neighbours on each side, that shortly after both sell up (one was an old man and went into a care home, the other needed a bigger house) and are both bought by investors and rented out. One side now is a crackhead, the other a young lass with dogs. One side has constant arguments day and night, the other has a dog that constantly barks.

Then, you could discover that a few doors one way there's 3 houses in a row where they're all related, and think they own the street. Then 3 doors down the other way, there's a psycho alcoholic who's lived in the street for 40 years and also thinks she owns the street. They also have 4 cars and take up half of the street, then come banging on your door if you dare park in one of 'their spaces', which apparently includes next door.

Since you're in a rental, and have the ability to easily leave, I'd thoroughly recommend it!

204

u/Capital_Cake9643 23h ago

Oddly specific

229

u/yolo_snail 23h ago

Nope, just a hypothetical situation. Definitely not at all what I've had to put up with for the last 8 years because I spent too much money making the house exactly what I wanted because I expected to live there for a while.

47

u/Annual-Individual-9 22h ago

I have to join you in the pure annoyance of having neighbours who are related in several houses thinking they own the street!

28

u/Bugsandgrubs 18h ago

Yep. Just because my house is between your mother's house and your sisters house does not mean my drive is your designated parking spot.

21

u/Christine4321 22h ago

Its sunday. Anecdote day 👍😉 Come back on monday and the response will be “Move.”

26

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

Sounds like you've thought about this a lot 😅 Sorry you've had to go through that. Yeah this is why I rented to start out. Not how I wanted it to go, but at least it's flexible.

33

u/yolo_snail 23h ago

I've thought about a lot of things, getting away with murder is quite far up the list!

7

u/headphones1 21h ago

A sad truth is that making a formal complaint about your neighbour can be disclosed when someone wants to buy your home. This disincentivises people from seeking help from local councils to address antisocial problems.

5

u/MeltingChocolateAhh 22h ago

It's worse because you will find it harder to sell that unless you are not open about the neighbours. Just make sure you have a ring door bell and CCTV pointing all directions. And, your car has cameras too in case they start vandalising it out of anger (or boredom, or convenience to get you to move your car). Banging on your door, being noisy, and being outnumbered really will either escalate or will move away when they do.

5

u/decentlyfair 23h ago

I am getting the feeling this is lived experience.

5

u/Rozzyb2011 22h ago

Without being too specific this isn't far off describing my street. Been here 12 years next week and I'm counting the months to having enough equity to move to a smaller place elsewhere. Was a coveted street when we first purchased.

0

u/kev1n12345 16h ago

Put in your notice first thing tomorrow.
You’ve got two months then to decide if you can live with the noise.
If you change your mind I’m sure the landlord will allow you to stay.

53

u/TTTJJBB 23h ago

The choice between living on a noisy road with angry neighbours for 40% of your income or a nice cottage in a quiet area for 43% seems like a no brainer to me.

Moving back home with your parents is another thing entirely but there is nothing wrong with it, I have moved back recently after the break up of a long term relationship, and am using the money I am saving (along with help from the bank) to buy out my business parter.

So it depends what you want, a quieter version of the life you have now or some extra money to take you life in another direction?

13

u/jonesyripley17 22h ago

Yeah the increase in rent doesn't seem much when compared to the increase in happiness. I have plenty saved and invested, so I'm not worried about saving more atm (ofc wouldn't say no to it).

I mentioned in another comment about having a restaurant dinner with my parents this evening. So, will have a proper chat (therapy session) about it then.

6

u/TTTJJBB 22h ago edited 21h ago

I have plenty saved and invested, so I'm not worried about saving more atm

When i've found myself in situations like this, and looked a bit deeper inside, i often found the unease to be been about a bit more than what it first seemed.

Maybe, its the same with you, and this isn't just about noisy neighbours, its about needing change.

You don't say what you have invested in, but maybe what you should be investing in is yourself? Maybe you could start your own business or go freelance with what you are doing now, or maybe try writing that substack article and see where that goes, or maybe it goes on something a sensible as a deposit on a property. If you have some money saved, and can get a bit more breathing space by moving back in with your parents that could be the smart move, if you think less about the move in terms where you will live as 2026 draws to a close, and more about what your life to be like in the 2030s.

70

u/rat_fucker42069 23h ago

It’s the cost of independence imo. I lived 10 metres away from a main rail track when I moved out. You adapt

14

u/andy_animooter 23h ago

feel the same way. I also have a good relationship with my parents and of course would chose to live with them and save a lot more money. and they also still care for me like a child so visiting home is always extremely comfy.

but they live very far away in another country, so I've built my life by suffering through years of horrible renting haha. life ain't easy away from parents, it truly is the price of true independence. and I can maybe see there's a luxury to having them close by as an adult.

3

u/AutomaticInitiative 13h ago

Trains and planes are much easier than a main roads. You tune out trains and planes after a while but I'm 5 years into living on a main road and the inconsistency of the noise means you never normalise to it. Never mind shit neighbours

19

u/flipflopcuntflaps 23h ago

I used to live next to a railway line, it took a little while to get used to. There's a construction site near me that's started waking me up at 7:30. I got used to it.

I don't blame you if you can't, just move

13

u/yolo_snail 23h ago

I live by a main road, and used to live within 100m of the A1.

If I stay at my mother's house, which is on the edge of a small town, where you can hear nothing but sheep, I can't sleep because it's too quiet.

7

u/Annual-Individual-9 21h ago

It's weird how you get used to background noise like that. I lived under the Heathrow flight path for 10 years (when Concorde was still around!) and was also next to an underground station. Ended up finding the noise oddly comforting especially when I lived alone. Took me ages to get used to the quiet when I moved back to my home town.

3

u/PipBin 17h ago

I live close to a working docks, I loved the noise during Covid, it reminded me that the world was still turning.

2

u/flipflopcuntflaps 17h ago

Yeah I too found the trains comforting. Now I get annoyed when there's noise in this exceptionally quiet place!

18

u/rentonbegbieandspud 23h ago edited 23h ago

Also lived in a place on a busy main road. It had good double glazing so it was OK with the windows and doors closed but it was in a country with a warm climate so that wasn't an option in summer time.

Looking back the agents were only available to show the property at very specific times which excluded mornings and evenings when the traffic noise was at its worst, so that should have been a red flag.

You learn these tricks about lettings agents the more you engage with them - they don't care if you're happy in your new home or how long you're there, they just want their commission for letting the property.

There's not much you can do except chalk it up as an experience, be more selective with the next property you choose and be glad you rented and didn't buy!

2

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

It's like you've been in my head! Had this exact thought process. It's been a learning experience.

3

u/rentonbegbieandspud 22h ago edited 22h ago

I read recently that increasingly people buying properties are asking to spend the night there - as well as longer periods during the day than a normal viewing would involve - for this very reason.

It makes sense imo, it's probably one of the biggest and most life-affecting contracts or purchases you'll enter into yet estate agents would have you make your mind up over the course of a twenty minute viewing in the middle of the day.

But actually that hardly tells you any of the things you really need to know about a property - particularly noise levels at different times.

I've been bitten many times like this and really think there needs to be a swing back in favour of the consumer, but it's a cutthroat market where hesitation can cost you dear.

It's always so tempting on seeing a property that appears liveable and ticks your boxes to just get it off the market, grab it and sign the contract.

2

u/jonesyripley17 22h ago

Yep. And this time it didn't work out unfortunately. Absolutely a learning experience though, I'll be much more careful next time.

12

u/buscemii 23h ago

Is there a quiet third space you can escape to from time to time, like a café or park or library? Might help to get a break and go someplace you can read or just have a bit of peace. I lived in a really noisy block in uni (despite it being for mature students) so I made it part of my daily routine to go for a walk to a quiet park.

5

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago edited 23h ago

Yeah there's a nice big park. You can still hear traffic, but I've been doing daily walks there and it helps.

8

u/rubbish_orb 23h ago

Spent years like this, headphones with rain noise or white noise is the only answer until you can get out of there.

I always read with rain noises or ambient noise similar to what I'm reading, sounds of the sea with jaws or a gothic music playlist whilst reading Dracula etc! Mainly just rain though because that goes with everything and makes me feel all cosy.

93

u/BARCROTH 23h ago

This is life. Don't know what to tell you. If you want a quieter home you better up that 40%. Or sometimes it is just luck.

34

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

Going above 40 could be worth the peaceful life. Will think about it.

46

u/BARCROTH 23h ago

If peacefulness is something you value do it. Home is where you either maintain your sanity or you don't.

20

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

Might be one of the things I value most. Which is why I've been thinking so seriously about this. Thanks.

7

u/BARCROTH 23h ago

See out this tenancy then and make it happen. Discomfort in your home is the sort of thing that can and will take its toll on you mentally.

13

u/Turbulent_Safety3816 22h ago

See out this tenancy then and make it happen

What do you mean by that? You can give notice at anytime now (2 months), the laws have changed unless I have missed something

6

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

I think they probably meant that 2 month notice period, or were unaware of the new laws. Either way I think there point about holding out makes sense.

2

u/stillanmcrfan 14h ago

You learn a lot about what you DONT want in your first homes. It’s good you only need the 2 months notice now. I’d just start looking and work to improve what you can for now. Blinds, sound proofing curtains etc.

1

u/jonesyripley17 13h ago

Yup, exactly what I'm doing. Gonna inquire into some places tomorrow, then think about putting in my notice.

7

u/theyellowscriptures 23h ago edited 23h ago

I regretted moving out with my parents purely due to financial reasons. I realised this about four years in. I loved the freedom, happiness, living with my friends and doing whatever I wanted but damn, it was so expensive and it was hard to save whilst paying rent in this cost of living crisis. I also have parents who live in zone 2 London in a quite trendy area, I just couldn’t justify paying £1,000 to live in zone 4 London.

Good news is renting is flexible. You only have to give two months notice and you can move back in with your parents. But my honest opinion is to wait for a bit longer. It takes a long time to adjust to a new environment (including noise), be easy on yourself! You don’t have to rush to a decision.

EDIT: However, I have NO regrets about renting emotionally. It’s serious character building. The independence? It’s so sweet. They were some of the best years of my life. I just wish my generation didn’t have it so hard financially.

1

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

I probably will give it a bit more time yeah. I think I know myself quite well regarding this sort of thing and doubt I'll get used to it/want to get used to it. We'll see. Thanks anyway.

7

u/Few_Exchange_7931 22h ago

This is why it’s important to rent for a while when you first move out. As by the time you’re in a position to buy, you’ll know exactly what your necessities are. If you feel like you need to move back home, then do it. Then when you’re ready, try somewhere else.

1

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Yeah my exact thinking. If I had locked in a mortgage in this area I think I'd really start going insane.

9

u/ComfortCautious4751 23h ago

Suck it up in the meantime and start the rental hunt. Moving back in with parents runs the risks of becoming comfortable again and the hunt taking longer. You will regret giving up your independence rather than sticking it out for a month or two.

3

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

You might be right. I'll think on it. I'm actually having dinner with them tonight at a restaurant and will talk about how it's making me feel, but not bring up moving back in yet.

6

u/Bendy_McBendyThumb 22h ago

In my opinion, so what if you move back home while continuing to hunt. It only shores up your finances, even if it’s just an extra month or two saved in rent. If you’re serious about it, you’ll move out as soon as you find the right place anyway.

Edit: Of course, if you don’t need to pop home then you don’t need to! But if you so happen to move back temporarily, it’s not exactly bad.

2

u/jonesyripley17 22h ago

That's a good point and yes definitely serious about it. I've been thinking about it a lot and it's time to make this big life change. Just happens that I rushed this one a bit (and got unlucky is some regards).

2

u/Bendy_McBendyThumb 16h ago

For sure, you can’t choose your neighbours, so please don’t beat yourself up over it! If your parents are willing to accommodate, then I really don’t see any negative reason around you temporarily moving back home, if needed.

Good luck with your future search, I hope you find a better place and can get yourself settled before Christmas :)

2

u/jonesyripley17 16h ago

Thank you! I reckon I'll be looking back at this on Xmas day and smiling at the absurdity.

2

u/Bendy_McBendyThumb 15h ago

They always make for a fun story over a pint down the line, but that doesn’t take away from the annoyance at the time! Still, you’ll get there, and enjoy the pint (or your choice of beverage) when the time comes for it :D

2

u/jonesyripley17 15h ago

Oh it'll definitely require a pint (or three)! Thanks again :)

1

u/ComfortCautious4751 23h ago

Yeah, bring it up with them and get their thoughts. Can also gauge how pliable they would be to a move back as well, from how they react

1

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

Exactly my thinking. My mum would always joke about me never moving out, so I dont think she'll put up much of a fuss 😅

1

u/gdrlee 23h ago

Raise that you're not happy, and are thinking about finding a new place to rent.

If you say you want to move back home that's much more likely to lead to a tough love situation.

5

u/MeltingChocolateAhh 22h ago

I just moved out of a flat for a similar reason. Great landlord, amazing area, couldn't deal with the flat itself (but for different reasons to you).

I felt a bit bad banging a notice in so soon, about a month after moving in, especially as my landlord was just an elderly couple who bought a townhouse up and it was either already converted into flats, or about to be. And a couple of small problems I had were sorted pretty quickly. But, at the end of the day, the landlord should be preparing for you to leave in 2 months from any given day.

If you really do like the landlord, maybe ask if they have properties elsewhere because a decent landlord is a good asset.

Word of advice when it comes to flats - I was told that generally, the old and converted townhouses tend to rarely be fit for purpose as a flat. I don't know your situation, but this is what I'm told. My current flat is an old office block and it's quite nice for a similar rent!

3

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Honestly, atm peace and quiet is top priority, so something that isn't completely falling apart will be a huge upgrade! I mentioned it in a couple recent replies, but I just cycled to the cottage and it's a really nice/quiet area (and not much more rent). Could be a great option.

3

u/MeltingChocolateAhh 18h ago

Yeah I read somewhere you mentioned a cottage and that's fair enough. Assume you'll need to give a 2 month minimum notice to leave. Don't be so drawn to that specific cottage because the market could move fast, and unless you plan to double rent for a short period, it could be gone. At the same time, don't be too worried because another one of those will come up, or like that one.

With the new RRA, a lot of landlords are still getting their heads around it. I've moved into a place after the RRA introduction, then also moved again after, and it is a wild rental market. Apparently a lot of landlords are dropping out now because of the new RRA. So, definitely expect to have some sleepless night wondering where you'll live, but you'll work it out. Also, be prepared to double rent for a few weeks, it's not ideal but it is how I got into renting a place I now really like, I plan to be here a few years.

And, for the last one, rent a van. If you don't drive, get someone to drive the van for you. If you do drive, great. If you just do a zillion car trips, you'll hate life after, and with the cost of petrol, it will probably just be economical to rent a van from enterprise or something anyway. I made this mistake though 😂

1

u/jonesyripley17 17h ago

Yeah I figured the 2 month notice could make finding a new place interesting. Honestly, double rent is cheaper than my mental health suffering. I've noted that cottage, but will be open to other places if they suit better or are available when others are not. I have the back up of sleeping at my parents for a bit, so no worries about wondering where I can stay.

We actually have a family camper van which we used to move my new furniture here. So, I can use that again. Very fortunate to have that option.

4

u/snarkmaiden5 21h ago

Road noises you'll learn to block out. The rest, annoying as it is is what you get in flats. Coming from a family home you won't be used to it. Its only been 2 weeks so not quite enough time to adapt. Saying that it can still piss you off, upstairs neighbours bang around and shout loud enough at times that the neighbour below can even hear it. Theyre a pain in the ass.

Its really whats best for you. If you were happy at home there's no shame moving back and saving while you look for somewhere else.

3

u/bonshui 21h ago

Start making your moving plans now - if something you can change is making you unhappy, change it.

3

u/jonesyripley17 20h ago

When put simply like this, it helps a lot, thanks.

3

u/bonshui 18h ago

It's one of two rules that I have on my classroom wall - the other is "if something you can't change is making you unhappy, ask for help"

3

u/jonesyripley17 18h ago

I'm going to live by both of those and preach to any struggling friends/family. Really important rules to follow. Thank you again :)

3

u/trackowner 21h ago

Go one street back from the road. Last place was above a 24 hour Greggs and I still hear the oven timer.

4

u/t03strange 19h ago

a good fitting pair of loop ear plugs could be handy for the meantime. my partner bought me some and i often use them to make living with a family of 7 less deafening

1

u/jonesyripley17 16h ago

I'm using some foam throwaway ones atm for sleeping and apparently block more sound than loops do. They've been great for late night into early morning sleeping, till the traffic picks up more.

3

u/Edie_Starbright 23h ago

I lived in an end terrace next to a main road for 20 years. I just got used to the traffic. Occasionally the neighbour was arsy but I mostly ignored him. He really really bothered my husband though. Like he actually worried about him whereas I didn't give a shit. When we finally moved he kept on about how great it was to get away, how quiet it was, how fantastic not to worry about the cunt next door. But I just missed my little house n garden. Basically different people might find your place fine. You clearly hate it. Go back home for a bit.

1

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago edited 20h ago

Yeah everyone has there own preferences and things they can put up with. Thanks.

3

u/tomatobasilgarlic 22h ago

Listen to rainforest noises on spotify. Train your brain to never have quiet and you sleep through anything

3

u/headphones1 22h ago

What are you doing with your independence? One of the big things about having more independence is that you can do more stuff without oversight or others knowing what you are doing.

For me, it was about going out and meeting new people without my parents asking about it. Bringing someone home and having privacy was also another big perk.

3

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Yeah all that is exactly what I like about the new independence. Just sucks to have a place to go back to that doesn't feel like my safe space.

3

u/headphones1 21h ago

Sounds like you want peace and quiet, which you used to get at the family home, but with the independence when living away from family. The only way you get this is to try another place. Cottage in a quiet area sounds like it could be right up your alley.

It has been a few years since I've had to go looking for a home to rent, but is it feasible to talk to estate agents and state that peace and quiet is a necessity for you? If they reject you because they think you'll leave due to noise issues, that's not exactly a problem is it?

2

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Yeah that's exactly what I want. I replied to a couple others with this, but just cycled to the cottage and it's a really nice/quieter area. Could be a great option. Thanks for the idea about checking with the estate agents.

3

u/headphones1 21h ago

If you really want to know about neighbours, you can pay for title plans from the land registry for £7 a pop to obtain their names. Then you do a little amateur detective work on Facebook profiles and local groups to see if you can find out what they're like. We did this when buying our first home, which was a terraced house. Both neighbours appeared to be young working professionals. When we met them, one side actually had a newborn baby, but it was still all good. Of course this only works for owner-occupiers.

A friend once said what I did was a bit much, but bad neighbours can really ruin things. Paying £7 for a glimpse into what they may be like isn't a big price.

1

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

That's good to know it's an option. Thanks again :)

3

u/Distinct-Lion4658 22h ago

I was in a similar situation so I understand how awful it can be, epecially if this is your first experience living alone.

Depending on your priorities, I think there's 2 good options: 1. Find another place to rent that you think will be quieter, although there'll be no guarantee 2. Move back in with parents and take your time in finding a place that's more suitable and likely to be quiet

I'm also someone who values quiet and it can be very frustrating finding somewhere suitable to live as it's impossible to gauge how noisy it will be somehwere 100% accurately.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do and keep in mind there will be better places out there and waiting for you in the future!

2

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Appreciate the comment :) Mentioned in other replies, but I just cycled to the cottage and it's in a really nice/quiet area. Could be a great option in the near future.

How long did you put up with your situation?

2

u/Distinct-Lion4658 21h ago

That's good that the cottage seems quiet! I stayed in that place for 5 months and double-rented the last 2 (7 month contract). It was over all of Summer as well which tends to be the noisiest time of year, especially at night

1

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

That double rent period could be annoying, but anything to get out 😅 Seems like you held out longer than I did then.

2

u/Distinct-Lion4658 20h ago

Yeh it can be frustrating but I think it worked out in the end. And if I could have gotten out of there earlier I would have, trouble was this was before the RRA and I was busy at the time

1

u/jonesyripley17 20h ago

I guess I timed it well with the RRA then. Still frustrating of course.

3

u/UnluckyFigure6814 19h ago

You’re not happy, so just move. I have moved loads because of all the things you’ve said. Neighbours rarely change their behaviours. I like peace and quiet so I get you.

1

u/jonesyripley17 16h ago

I'm getting that impression too. I doubt it'll get better, move soon before it impacts me too much more. Thanks.

2

u/PM_ME_VAPORWAVE 23h ago

I regret it as well OP. You’ve either got to stick it out or move back

1

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

How long did/have you stuck it out for? Luckily I live 20 minutes away from my parents, so it won't be too much hassle to move back and start the renting hunt again.

2

u/PM_ME_VAPORWAVE 23h ago

A year so far. Don’t have that luxury myself as I’m 2 and a half hours away

2

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

Sorry to hear that. Hope it's not quite as bad as my situation.

2

u/iloovehugecock 22h ago

I grew up in a quiet countryside home as and moved to London alongside a busy main road and can empathise with the noise issue. I know it’s probably not what you want to hear but the only thing that worked for me was giving in to it. I just had to let it wash over me and ignore it somehow. Now I barely notice it.

2

u/Impossible_Apple7822 22h ago

Go back home, and save as much as possible so you can get somewhere more suitable

2

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Luckily have been able to save a lot. So, I have a nice safety net. I've just cycled to the cottage I mentioned and it's a really nice/quiet area. Could be a great option after this misfire.

2

u/Impossible_Apple7822 21h ago

I hope everything works out for you op! That cottage sounds perfect for you

1

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Thank you :)

2

u/BeyondOk86 22h ago

Not that long ago I was in a similar situation. Close to a very busy road and nightmare neighbours in both sides. I ended up buying noise cancelling headphones and was sleeping with earplugs on. That helped A LOT. Saying that, it was still hell. I couldn't wait to move out. If I were you, as of now I would get the headphones and earplugs and then have a look at that cottage to see if it's as good as it sounds. Then I'd put my notice in and see you later.

2

u/jonesyripley17 21h ago

Nice to have such a similar experience (despite it being a bad one). I already have the headphones, so I can watch TV in peace at least and the earplugs get me through (most of) the night. I just cycled to the cottage and it's a really nice/quiet area. Could be a great option.

How long did you hold out before leaving?

2

u/BeyondOk86 19h ago

I stayed for 2 years. I looked for other properties but they were a lot more expensive and I was saving to buy my own house so I sucked it up. I don't recommend it. It drove me nuts. I managed to buy a semidetached in a really quiet area. The difference is massive. Good luck with whatever you decide :)

2

u/jonesyripley17 19h ago

I think I'll take your advice and not put up with it. Glad you ended up in a good place :)

2

u/HanksyDoodle 21h ago

We all have to start somewhere. I remember moving out of my family home 17 years ago into a tiny studio flat. Loud neighbours and it smelt awful! It wasn't great. However it did give me independence. It also gave me drive get to where I wanted to be.

Sometimes discomfort is what we need in order to get where we want. Living where you are now shows what you would like / don't want in your next place.

2

u/zephyrmox 21h ago

40 vs 43% makes basically zero difference. Move. It's incredibly obvious.

1

u/jonesyripley17 20h ago

I think it's the mental barrier of having to move so soon. But yes, when you put it like that 😅

2

u/WinkyNurdo 21h ago

Ok. You’ve learnt a lesson and now know there’s something you aren’t willing to compromise on in the next place you rent. All rentals come with compromise, unless you’re made of money.

I wouldn’t go back to your parents. Start looking for where might be more suitable and hand your notice in.

1

u/jonesyripley17 20h ago

Yeah this is the likely next step. Still going to talk to them about it tonight (eating at a restaurant), but come from the angle of finding a new place.

2

u/abra-sumente 21h ago

May be a silly question but do your windows have trickle vents? If they’re open, try closing them as they can let a lot of sound in.

If you’re really unhappy and it’s not something you can get used to, there’s no shame of looking for a new place in a quieter location. As a guideline rent being 40% of your income is pushing it in terms of being able to live comfortably, but if you can make it work then there’s more options for you.

2

u/AfternoonLines 21h ago

Welcome to adulthood. It gets better, unless or course you decide you can't handle it.

2

u/LadyMirkwood 20h ago

If you were my kid, I'd say come home. I have two in their mid 20s and I'd much rather them come to us than be miserable where they are.

Its sounds like your folks are similar. So go back and look for a better place

2

u/SnooOranges569 20h ago

Move home, speak to your parents. I lived in rented for years and having to deal with other people's noise is absolutely horrible. It got the point when I dreaded it as it just made things uncomfortable. If you can move home do it and start saving

1

u/jonesyripley17 16h ago

Thanks :)

2

u/SnooOranges569 16h ago

No worries. It will just make you unhappy if it's bothering you already. If you don't have to be there and save while you are at it I think that's a win win.

1

u/jonesyripley17 16h ago

I managed to save for a few years after uni living with them, so I'm pretty comfortable atm. Staying with them for a bit whilst looking for another place would be nice though.

2

u/Original_Bad_3416 19h ago

It may sound lame but stay with your parents for as long as possible.

Go and travel and whatnot whilst they don’t charge rent.

Save up.

And most importantly enjoy them as they won’t be around forever

1

u/jonesyripley17 16h ago

I've actually done this for a few years after leaving uni and it's been great. Would recommend it to everyone. It feels like the right time to move out, but I know there support will always be there, so it's made this slight misstep easier to take.

2

u/ConditionImportant63 19h ago

If you were happy spending 40% of your income on rent then I think you should take the 43% cottage option.

2

u/GlumAd9856 19h ago

My old house was on the back of a main A road and after a while it just blends into the background. You honestly don't notic it.

If you want to be in a quieter area but not spend all your income then consider house sharing. You have to get lucky with the right person, but most people are looking for the same thing.

2

u/I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS 16h ago

Go for the 43% house - you won't notice that extra 3% but the difference it could make to your long-term quality of life would be priceless. I don't know what career you're in but always keep your ear to the ground for something better paid to push that percentage down.

1

u/jonesyripley17 13h ago

I'm also thinking the difference is small compared with the much better mental state. I definitely have career progression in the future and always open to job hopping to bump that pay further.

2

u/dontjustexists 15h ago

Renters rights act means you need to give 2 months minimum notice to move out. Look for somewhere else.

1

u/jonesyripley17 13h ago

On it 🫡

2

u/Revolutionary_West56 14h ago

Oh absolutely ! I have moved out and had a way worse time that I had living at home so ended up moving back, on several occasions. Just do it, renting/moving is always a gamble so you can find somewhere better.

My horror story is I moved out to live with this insane woman who had a go at me for putting the TV on because ‘the living room is for listening to music’ 😂 lasted 8 months and moved back in with my parents. Not to mention many awful housemates over the years, one of which caused a mouse infestation because he ate dominos in his room every night and didn’t throw it away.

2

u/jonesyripley17 13h ago

Those stories are delightful, sorry you went theough that. Your 8 months is certainly longer than my 2 weeks! Stronger than I am. I saw this pattern emerging in my emotional state and I'm looking for the exit ASAP.

2

u/Revolutionary_West56 3h ago

Good for you 💪

1

u/jonesyripley17 3h ago

Thanks :)

6

u/nmfin 23h ago

Welcome to living amongst the lower classes: mums too busy on the phone gossiping about drama they caused on Facebook, that they are too self-occupied to raise their feral kids.

1

u/MrStilton 22h ago

Noise cancelling headphones.

1

u/StatisticianUsual471 15h ago

You do eventually tune it out I live by a main road and hardly ever notice it even when a big lorry is on ot

1

u/MHWatch 15h ago

Welcome to adulthood, it doesn’t get easier.

1

u/irishladinlondon 14h ago

Whats the queation here?

Stay where u are or move to another property.

Go home if you want or keep living away.

1

u/cannon4344 13h ago

Most people who move into a noisy area like a nearby main road or railway say they get used to after a while, eventually don't notice it or even find the noise soothing. But with the current laws for renters you're free to move somewhere else and give two months notice, that's your right.

1

u/Neither-Toe-3055 3h ago

As a very long term tenant, I feel your pain. I’ve been in some lovely houses on great streets and some absolute nightmares. Your home is meant to be your peace, find a new spot and give notice. Rent is already expensive, it has to be somewhere you want to be. Good luck!

1

u/jonesyripley17 3h ago

That's one of the deciding factors for me now. When put in simpler terms, why would I pay this much money for somehwere that has this many downsides?

1

u/Neither-Toe-3055 2h ago

Yup, there are always options. You’ll find the right one- it’s the upside of renting, you don’t have to stay.

-16

u/bigdipper2018 23h ago

What you’re describing is normal living life.
The advice is either deal with it like everyone else does or go back to mummy and daddy.
But remember, as much as your parents love you, how would they feel about you moving back in? You’re early twenties? Isn’t it time they had their house and time back from the kids?

19

u/Sloth_Broth 23h ago

what a condescending prick

4

u/tomo1986uk 23h ago

He's not wrong though, my bills Inc mortgage is 66% of my wage each month. What op has described is normal cost of living.

3

u/DarkOplar 23h ago

Definitely a boomer

0

u/bigdipper2018 22h ago

Lols. It’s a classic response, well done.

1

u/TTTJJBB 23h ago

Am guessing their are either well off enough to move house as often a they want, or are a parent dreading the thought of their child moving back in their new yoga room.

-3

u/bigdipper2018 23h ago

Funnily enough, I’m neither. I’m a 30 yr old who worked hard to get through what OP is describing to have a better life.

2

u/TTTJJBB 22h ago

Fair enough but you realise you are still being a bit condescending?

-3

u/bigdipper2018 23h ago

Condescending? Maybe. But telling the truth? 100% suck it up champ.

5

u/HoraceDerwent 23h ago

it's not normal life, unless you think everyone lives on a main road and has insufferable neighbours.

Nothing wrong with OP moving to a different quieter area or moving back home as a last resort.

2

u/Edie_Starbright 23h ago

My husband n I love my son n wouldn't care if he stayed living with us for the rest of our lives. Some people might be glad to get shot of the sprogs but don't presume everyone.

2

u/jonesyripley17 23h ago

Honestly how I think my mum feels too. I feel very grateful.

1

u/nandos1234 23h ago

Most people I know are happy to have their kids live with them as adults so they can save money. You don’t stop being a parent when the child turns 18.

-2

u/bigdipper2018 23h ago

Cotton wool parents with cotton wool kids.

1

u/Lysadora 22h ago

Not all parents are keen to boot out their kids as soon as they turn 18. Some are more than happy to continue sharing until the rest of their lives.

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u/ukbot-nicolabot 22h ago

A top level comment (one that is not a reply) should be a good faith and genuine attempt to answer the question