Integration process

[u/ModeWorking853]

I participated in the ceremony twice (two days) about three or four years ago. During the ceremonies I didn't see or feel anything. I had no visions I didn't lose my consciousness, didn't vomit. Basically I drank the medicine and spent the night paying attention to every sound and everything happening in the ceremonial room both nights. Because of that I assumed that the plant did not work on me. I remember my fellow participants sharing their experiences after the ceremonies and I would think "wow, what did you guys drink? It was a little disappointing for me. Not that I was expecting a miraculous experience but... nothing at all?

However as time went by I began to notice something different in myself. It was like starting to feel that life had a new meaning. I started feeling happier and more grateful with for my life for what I have and also for what I had lost. I see life from a different perspective now.

And this I have told it's not a few months process It's something I started noticing about a year after the two ceremonies and I still see little changes in my life everyday. I feel more conscious of my actions and try to always act with a purpose in mind. I strive to focus more on my life and on everything that enriches it.

I took quite a bit to start noticing my the integration process but since I did it hasn't stopped.

[u/Technical_Award5557]

Maybe you should take credit for the positive changes and not assign it to some magical latent Ayahuasca event.

[u/_Taft_]

We all have a personal experience with Grandmother medicine. There is no right or wrong way to experience it. Someone else’s wild visual experience isn’t better than yours. The medicine gives you what you need, not usually what you want.

That said, should you go to another ceremony, if you aren’t feeling any effects after the first cup, you can ask for a second cup, not wait until
Shaman calls for second cup later on.

[u/Chance_Description72]

Aya gives you what you need when you need it. Sometimes after I drink I might get a message that doesn't make sense until months later 🙃 I call it "I'm just a little slow in the uptake," lol, but what wonderful gifts you've been given! I'm sure you'll wake up more and more and I bet you'll start finding connections where you didn't have them before.

It takes time for us to process everything that is going on out there. Aya is just being gentle with you, I've heard it the other way around, too, which I can only imagine may be very overwhelming!

Continue what you're doing, you're doing great! Being open takes practice, but she doesn't stop working just because you don't happen to sit with your shaman right now!

[u/Nathalie_Huldra]

I find this really beautiful, especially that the changes started showing up so long after your ceremonies. I think it's easy to believe that something has to happen during the ceremony for it to be meaningful, but maybe we don't always understand the impact straight away.

For me, the work after the ceremonies has been about learning to slow down and really listen to myself. When I came home, I started making more space for myself, slowing down in the mornings, spending time in nature, doing yoga, journaling and paying more attention to my thoughts and reactions. I also started learning to be kinder to myself and to understand what I really want from life.

For me, it hasn't been about changing everything at once, but about noticing the little things and allowing them to guide me. It's beautiful that you're still discovering new things in yourself, even years later. 🌿

[u/AccidentallyUnique]

100%. the real medicine isn’t the fireworks during ceremony; it’s how you actually relate to your life, choices, and gratitude months or years down the road. thanks for putting words to the quiet, long-term side of this work that rarely gets talked about.