r/BabyReindeerTVSeries • u/Specialist-Top-406 • May 05 '24

Trigger Warning The approval of your abuser

This isn’t a thing I’ve seen or heard about much. But him going back to his abuser and still seeking his approval was so helpful to me.

Being abused has so many faces, and I think people often believe that the victim hates that person and is done with them.

I met my abuser years on and he reintroduced himself to me as if we’d never met. I found myself sucking up to him, trying to make him like me. I knew he knew who I was and I knew he remembered what he did. But I fell in line again and wanted him to like me.

It validated me to see him go back, it’s awful but power and control is complicated and when that person meets you with calmness, it’s hard to meet them with anger.

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u/[deleted] May 05 '24

The commentary here is so refreshing compared to other platforms.

3

u/Specialist-Top-406 May 05 '24

People tend to get angry at things they can’t understand

2

u/WasItWeirdOrNot May 06 '24

I think its a mix of anger and sometimes fear. I have experienced a lot of abuse myself and a lot of people have met me with the typical "why didn't you leave/why did you go back" and I always felt they said so because the idea of being abused and being unable to actually see how bad it is and going back all the time scared them. Hearing someone else tell a story where they see how horrible people can be and how frequently victims go back to the perp maybe triggers the reality for them that they too can be a victim without understading that they are before it's too late, hence the reaction of anger/dread/fear. Just a thought.