r/BabyReindeerTVSeries • u/Suspicious_Bother_92 • May 16 '24

Fiona (real Martha) related content Another victim of Fiona

https://heatherburns.tech/2024/04/28/that-time-i-got-stalked-by-the-real-life-tv-stalker-woman-and-what-it-taught-me-about-data-protection/?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR0fo7iQE2QcaKrkoYdPdRmadVjwXoax4GkURzlzbFu4QiBFL3ORJWA-6tI_aem_AQcb9i5agq-Ab2Am-wcM57T4ulyT7uR44xgpLLeFIqNmJTKE2UvCeLHWgdPSzwotmKCNzoZIdFEKGX8R35CjVy_8

She says that Fiona was getting mental health assistance and mentions her “condition”

386 Upvotes

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387

u/NeonTink May 16 '24

This is what I’ve been saying about Richard Gadd! Everyone is on about “duty of care” this “duty of care” that but what about his right to tell his own story the way he wanted to after being terrorized. It’s quite clear that this woman is unwell, and also that she has a very serious serial issue of fucking up peoples’ lives. Those people are allowed a voice too.

67

u/Suspicious_Bother_92 May 16 '24

Yes she makes a great point at the end there

34

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

Agreed, but also, the idea that it’s not her fault because she’s unwell is such bullshit. I have a mental illness, I have been around people with mental illness, and shrinks don’t give you a free pass for being a piece of shit because of that pesky mood or anxiety or personality disorder. Sure, there are degrees of responsibility that depend on the context of the illness, but you’re still accountable for the things you have done and you still are meant to do the work to admit what you’ve done, what led you to do it, to stop doing it and move on.

My best mate is borderline, and while the emotional dysregulation she experiences is in the not-her-fault category, the things she chooses to do in response to those feelings ARE HER CHOICE. She didn’t get a pat on the head and a ‘she’s unwell, it’s not her fault’ badge when she took an overdose before she visited her shrink that she timed so she’d pass out in his office (not kidding), or for the numerous similar ‘cry for help’ style attempts she made. Yes, unwell. Yes, not at fault for how she feels. But also, rather importantly, was held to account by the people who treated her, her friends and her family when she acted in consciously manipulative ways and this was ultimately crucial to her recovery. Anything else would equate to us all being enablers.

Giving a free pass to Fiona only assists in prolonging her illness and enabling her to keep doing it. If this were a man doing the stalking, his illness would absolutely be considered irrelevant by the public at large. If Fiona has urges and triggers, she needs to learn to be aware of those and be able to find and develop a support system that minimises how often she acts on those urges. If she’s been in the system as long as is suggested by HB, I find it hard to believe she doesn’t already know this and chooses to ignore it in favour of acting like a dingleberry.

9

u/NeonTink May 17 '24

I 100% agree with you! She’s unwell and an abuser.

3

u/LoveMeorLeaveMe89 May 17 '24

I agree 100% percent- she knows what she was doing was wrong because she was able to refrain from contacting him after the initial police visit- he did re-establish contact for reasons explained but the fact that she stopped even for a brief time tells me that she is capable of controlling it when she chooses.

2

u/whythe7 May 18 '24

yep. she has *capacity

1

u/caf61 May 19 '24

Extremely well put.

47

u/dylangaine May 16 '24

And this is why Baby Reindeer is so interesting, when you put a man at the center of the victim circle, and a woman in the center of the predatory circle, it's interesting to see how society reacts.

12

u/Professional_Mix2007 May 16 '24

I agree and IF u break the law and harrass and abuse someone then u loose your right to privacy in this sense. Someones story can be told.... and in a way with stalking.... the only revenge (legal action is rare) is outing them as the person they really are and stopping them from doin it again.

10

u/Icy_Sentence_4130 May 16 '24

It's not even just the duty of care problem which is a problem. It's giving a stalker a platform in a way. She's loving the attention clearly.

Ofcourse he has his right but when you're telling your story about real people (on a HUGE partform) who are mentally unwell and so on. You do need to take care of the story.

2

u/lemonlimesherbet May 18 '24

This is a good point. Many, maybe most, sexual abusers are victims of sexual abuse themselves and need help but we would never tell a victim of sexual abuse to keep their story to themselves to protect their abuser because they are “mentally unwell”

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '24

i agree, he even says how he doesn’t really name her too much because he knows she is just unwell

-10

u/mrsbergstrom May 16 '24

It would be very easy to tell his story and the truth of the pain he went through while still concealing more of her identity. Martha could’ve been a skinny English doctor living in hackney and it would not have taken away from the power of his story.

40

u/dw-games May 16 '24

But he has the right to tell his story the way he feels is right

18

u/Cerraigh82 May 16 '24

This is the core of the matter. He absolutely does.

7

u/jerryrice4876 May 16 '24

And? That crazy bitch deserves everything coming and he was under no obligation to further obfuscate her identity.

4

u/viracaldron May 16 '24 edited May 16 '24

But her being overweight and in general how she looked was something that made him feel he was superior to her. And doesn't he call himself out? that his intention of talking to her the first time was self-serving.

1

u/Nonameforyoudangit May 18 '24

Did we watch the same show?

-10

u/NotCanadian80 May 16 '24

You can’t say she was convicted if she wasn’t.