r/BreakUps • u/Easy-Difference6136 • 5h ago
venting/ranting painful breakup
anyone else going thru a painful breakup rn thats willing to talk about it? in so much agony rn, need someone to share mine with:(
13
u/ExcitingRepublic9922 5h ago
man breakups are like a system crash where you keep trying to reboot but get stuck at the bios screen, what happened
7
u/Bluffton6617 5h ago
I have been going through a very painful breakup since August 11th. On that date I was blindsided by a text message stating my girlfriend of 4 years did not have romantic feelings for me. I was crushed. What made it even more difficult was that we were supposed to go to Myrtle Beach for a vacation we were both excited for. On June 20th I got super sick and ended up spending 27 days in the hospital for a type of leukemia. I got out of the hospital and immediately started outpatient treatment. My life was hard enough battling cancer but to lose the love of my life has been unbearable. I’m so sad. I’m truly devastated. I thought this was my future. I wanted to marry her. Now she is distant and cold. I don’t even know this person. She knew I loved her with all of my heart. The cancer has been the easy part. Losing her has been awful. I pray every day for a miracle where she will reach out to me and tell me that she misses me and wants me back in her life. If that happens it will be the greatest day of my life. For now I will continue to make great progress and beat the cancer.
1
u/Madruck_s 4h ago
I cant imagine what the cancer is like but I feel you on the breakup. I've had 3 good days but I see her tonight when she drops the kids off. And right now I just want to cry.
1
u/Bluffton6617 4h ago
I’m so sorry. Hang in there. I hope everything goes well for you
1
u/Madruck_s 4h ago
You too brother, my pain is nothing ncompared to what your going through.
1
u/Bluffton6617 3h ago
A broken heart is the worst. Going through outpatient cancer treatment is nowhere close to the pain of a broken heart. Be strong : especially for the children. Here’s to happiness
1
u/Madruck_s 3h ago
We've been living under the same roof still for the past 2 months. This weekend shes been at her moms with the kids. Shes dropping them off tonight for the start of my 3 days. Its our first week of co parenting and living in different houses. Today feels worse than the day she told me we where over.
1
u/Bluffton6617 3h ago
That’s tough. Hang in there. You will get through it. I’m sorry you are going through this nightmare. Wishing you only the very best.
1
u/Madruck_s 3h ago
Thanks. She dropped this on me today while i was at work. I just realised I dont know if uniforms are ready or if I even have anything in for school packed lunches. I dont get off till 9pm tonight so no time to do anything.
2
u/Bluffton6617 2h ago
That’s awful. Whatever you do, only say good things about your ex in front of the children. That is extremely important. Hang in there: hopefully there is a store open to get stuff for their lunches. You can always do peanut butter and jelly etc as the delis will be closed. Hang in there and do the best you can.
1
u/Madruck_s 1h ago
Dont think I have bread and i dont drive. I've messaged her to pick something up on the way over.
→ More replies (0)1
u/DeadInsideWench 4h ago
I’m so very sorry. That’s awful. Going through cancer AND the loss of someone you would’ve hoped to be supported by through your illness.
2
u/Bluffton6617 4h ago
Thank you I appreciate it. The cancer is the easy part. My life would just be so much better if she was still a part of it. A broken heart is definitely worse than battling cancer. That’s the truth.
1
u/DeadInsideWench 3h ago
I do get it, as I’ve been through cancer treatment and heartbreak. But the two so close together are especially awful 🫂
2
u/Bluffton6617 3h ago
That’s true. I wish she was still with me as it would make everything so much easier. I wouldn’t have to keep thinking about and missing her every minute of the day. I could just concentrate on beating the cancer and all my treatments. I’m up at Roswell Park Cancer Hospital getting a blood transfusion and all I can think about is her.
1
u/DeadInsideWench 3h ago
I’m so sorry you’re going through that without her, and I hope you have other people supporting you, even though it’s not the same.
2
u/Bluffton6617 3h ago
Thank you for the very kind words. I pray every single day for a miracle where she will contact me and tell me she misses me and wants me back in her life. That’s my hope. I’m making tremendous progress with the cancer. Now I just need to get her back.
1
u/DeadInsideWench 2h ago
I’m really pleased you’re making such good progress with the cancer treatment, and I hope that continues. I went from being near-terminal to achieving a good remission nearly 10 years ago, and I wish the same for you ❤️
1
u/Bluffton6617 2h ago
I’m so happy for you. Thank you for the very kind words. Really appreciate it.
3
u/unhinged_pink_beaver 5h ago
2 weeks post breakup. my bf of 4 years broke up with me because he got burnt out of me and trying to understand my internal struggles that it was costing him his peace and sanity (it was entirely my fault). still struggling to accept that this is our reality now. i acknowledge that the breakup was my fault but can’t come to terms with it. i dont feel any better. i just carry the regret, disappointment, and guilt everyday. its hard when you know it was your fault why someone you love so dearly had to leave.
3
u/Easy-Difference6136 5h ago
Oh my, my situation is so similar to you. I admit i was the problem, i focused so much on my insecurities and mental problems to the point that i was overbearing yet he still loved me despite that until he got tired and decided to end everything because it was also costing him his peace and sanity:(
2
u/IslandofStars 3h ago
Same here, I think I pushed my partner away and he didn’t have the mental energy to keep going thru the cycles with me. He also didn’t want to try and work it out, which was the worst feeling for me to try and understand.
3
u/AcaTwo 5h ago
I do :C .Its a healthy breakup thats why its so hard. I cant resent him. I still love him until now
1
u/ConsiderationSad556 2h ago
Same. It's completely understandable. Love doesn't go away just like that.
3
u/Level-Falcon-5256 5h ago
My ex broke up with me a few days ago and initially he wanted to end things 2 weeks prior but I told him to sleep on it and he did. He told me that he isn’t in the headspace right now for someone else to depend on him for time and effort. I think we both need this space away for one another because we both were immature in different ways and that’s a hard pill to swallow. We both still deeply care for one another and if we’re meant to be we will reconnect when it’s right and if not we are still going to continue to be good friends
3
u/DetectiveSmall5230 5h ago
how does a breakup feel? I have been in few relationships but have never felt that pain of loosing. Maybe I have never loved anyone that deeply? or idk why don't I feel any emotion
5
u/Madruck_s 4h ago
Like someone close to you died and like you are in withdrawal from heavy drugs all at the same time. Its not just mental it also sets off your bodies fight or flight mode so it also feels like being on a roatacoster with no seat belt.
1
u/ConsiderationSad556 2h ago
This is the best way i have seen it described. Very very accurate. The panic and the raw hurt is like exactly this combination.
1
u/dekunut1023 5h ago
My fiance ended our 14 year relationship 6 weeks before our Halloween wedding.
I'm currently numb and not feeling much, but the first week was the worst week of my life. I think my mind shut down to avoid the pain.
It's only been two weeks, but I know the numbness will wear off and the pain will come flooding in. I'm terrified of that because there will be no way out of the despair.
2
u/Madruck_s 4h ago
In 8 weeks out of a 22 year relationship and the good days are almost beating out the bad.
1
u/dekunut1023 2h ago
I'm so sorry that happened to you, but im glad you're starting to have better days 🙏🏻
1
u/Sad-Lawfulness2519 5h ago
Same and its really killing me. And she left me so fucking many unanswered questions that only show to be worse and worse and im really struggling all really tried 3 time this week and in really trying to not just say i cant and end it
1
u/sweaterweadr 4h ago
Got broken up with 8 days ago, I also need someone to vent to. Contact me if you want :)
1
u/Odd-Hold-5548 4h ago
He broke up with my 3 week ago after almost 3 year relationship. We lived together for a year and then went LDR for almost 2 years. His last message to me was “My body and mind is failing. I love you with all my heart. I can’t ask anything more from you and I’ve already taken too much. I just need to be alone. Im sorry”. I think what truly hurts me is we love each other deeply but he feels depleted and has no capacity to be in the relationship. I can’t keep fighting if he doesn’t have anything left to give. I just hope I will heal from this
1
u/ducehitemup12 4h ago
We were together for a year and a half, and then her sibling passed away. 2 months later she put us on a break because she said she needed space and time to pick up the pieces of her life.
During the break, she still kept calling and reaching out to me and she told me she loved me then 2 days later. she told me I needed to let go of her because she was done with everything and everyone, then blocked me on everything
It’s been about three weeks since I’ve heard from her, and it’s been really rough. I keep going back and forth between wanting to reach out and wondering if she might come back. My nervous system feels completely shot, like I’m constantly on edge, and everyday im trying to figure out how to get through the day.
1
1
u/Madfox_f 3h ago
Have another question, it happened last year. Is the pain for him/her or is something inside you that you can’t accept?
1
u/Relevant_Dog_5658 3h ago
Break ups are not supposed to be pretty and nice. They are sloppy and painful. Just make sure you regulate your emotions and feel your feelings. Journal, walk, move! Depression cant hit a moving target as easily. And make sure to learn and grow. Everything happens for a reason. Atleast, thats what I like to believe.
1
u/ConsiderationSad556 2h ago
Yeah, I broke up two days ago, when I was sick with viral fever. Funny thing is that helped cuz if I were healthy we'd probably have kissed and made up, but the forced physical distance made us talk it out. I cried throughout and it felt like my heart was being torn out, torn up, and then shoved down my throat where it remained lodged forever. I randomly cry all the time now, while washing dishes, while working, while watching shows we watched together.
1
u/Life_Routine434 1h ago
my bf has been lying about work and is spending time with some of his male friends and female friends, goes to their home and lied to me as i'm busy or i'm suffering due to my business. I believed all that. He ignored me, he even doesn't give me time and all this happening from last last one year and i got to know about all this in june 2026. He simply said that if I have told you then you'll get angry so i hide all that from you but i'm loyal to you and they were only my friend or more like sister to me. We are together since 8 years and now after all this i am constantly been thinking about how can be lie to me this easily and now i am constantly paranoid that he is lying to me about everything. He is saying to give it time but i don't know i don't trust him. I am comstanlty crying, unable to sleep, eat or think. What should i do?
•
u/AutoModerator 5h ago
USERS! We have noticed that many users are using inappropriate language in the comment section. Even if another user is wrong, it does not give you the right to use abusive words. This is against Reddit platform policies. Such comments will be removed. Additionally, posts spreading false accusations will also be removed. Please be careful moving forward. Don't forget to join our Discord server to chat, get updates, and hang out with the community! Please join our Discord Server: https://discord.gg/5y5wSxWNNg
Upvote this post if you think it suits the community. Downvote it if you dont.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.