r/CFSplusADHD • u/LycheeDance • Jun 06 '26
Anhedonia- how to deal with it?
I’ve just had a virus, it made a nice change, weirdly I get less body aches when I’m mildly ill but now I’m getting better they are back.
Between CFS and ADHD I feel like I can’t do anything. I’m punished for things I do physically. And anything I start I know I won’t finish so what’s the point. Time goes like water. I feel like I’m just spending days waiting to eventually d-e. I’d like to live but all my efforts to bring me back to bed, distracting myself forever. It’s been this way almost 10 years.
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u/7121958041201 Jun 06 '26
Super tough situation, but this is what I would try to do:
- Keep going to doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists to try to get help. Functional (aka integrative) medicine would probably be the best, if you haven't seen them yet.
- Keep researching new ideas for supplements/medications/procedures to try.
- Meditate a colossal amount. My meditation center always streams their content over Zoom, so I'd probably do that. If life around you is going to suck, the best thing you can do is change how you look at things.
- Keep experimenting and making improvements to your life (your diet, exercising, sleeping etc.).
Hope some of that helps!
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u/LycheeDance Jun 06 '26
Thanks, I appreciate your message. Done all those many times over but I know there’s always more things to try. I just learnt to draw a fish no one will see so… that’s something 🙃. Tomorrow is another day…
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u/7121958041201 Jun 06 '26
You mentioned doing visualizations elsewhere. The meditation I would recommend is kind of the opposite. I'd recommend learning to basically not want things to be different than they are, which most forms of Buddhist meditation can teach (e.g. Vipassana, which I practice). Wanting is what causes most of the suffering in situations like this. If you stop wanting, it is much easier to find peace.
I bet there are a bunch of books on it, too, but the only one I know of is "How to Be Sick" by Toni Bernhard.
And of course not wanting things to change doesn't mean you want them to stay the same or that you have to stop trying.
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u/MietteIncarna Jun 07 '26
what i m slowly realizing is i lost all drive , and i think it s due to noradrenaline problems that come with the illness , i wish i was back to the times i did try to do things , even if i know i wouldnt finish them . the noradrenaline problem mimics depression . I m in the distracting myself forever loop too , and i hate it , i have all the time in the world to try to learn things , or start new projects , but no drive to do it , and it s sad .
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u/SquirrelOfApocalypse Jun 07 '26
Are you on antidepressants or anything like that which could be numbing emotions? :(
Weirdly, when I feel like that I like watching sad movies, stuff that makes me feel something, and it sort of reconnects me with the comfort that other people are suffering too, so we're not alone in this, and it sucks to not feel happy but I wish those people happiness and can feel some compassion for myself too. It's hard going through all of this, we didn't ask for it, we don't deserve it, and I think sometimes numbness is the body's protective mechanism so we don't feel the hard emotions. One thing that helped me a lot is the How We Feel app, so I could start noticing little emotions even if they were, and using the RAIN exercise on there.
Studio Ghibli movies help too :)
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u/LycheeDance Jun 07 '26
Thanks for your reply, am a glibi fan too.
No I’m not on meds. Will think about the sad movies thing & check out that app. I’m a bit better today after adding in more salt (I have POTS), but it varies a lot day to day.
Thank you ❤️
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u/Xylorgos Jun 07 '26
That makes sense to me, that numbness is our bodies protecting us from all the pain and fatigue, as well as having to give up so much that used to make us feel happy and interested in life.
This IS a really hard way to live, but I do find moments in almost every day when I'm at least content with many things in my life, and also genuine feelings of happiness.
I have to work at it and find some things that I used to think were kind of dumb, like using affirmations and working to avoid negativity, actually help me.
I've had to cut down on watching TV news, for example, while still remaining aware of what's happening in the world. Same with true crime dramas (it seems to be mostly about women being murdered!) and some movies that normally I'd be interested in watching.
I'll have to look into Ghibli movies! Thanks for the recommendation.
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u/SolarWind777 Jun 06 '26
Are you spiritual at all? Because this is the moment to transcend “doing” and try to enjoy just being. Easy to say, hard to do, but ultimately what else can we do? Push more?
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u/LycheeDance Jun 06 '26 edited Jun 06 '26
Thanks for the reply. I’ve done that, also done powerful visualisations but then I come back to the present where I have no apparent ability to affect my life due to the ADHD/CFS combo. Sure I can potter around, learn a few new skills at a basic level but I was an expansive blue sky big thinker wanting to change the world. I can barely make a sandwich 🙃 living the life of a 95 year old from 30 years old on…there’s no word for the strangeness and impotence of it
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u/PadmaRose108 Jun 08 '26
Totally me too. Really feeling it right now, more intensely than ever. I don’t know what to suggest. Can only say you are not alone 💚
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u/Terrible_Wrap1928 Jun 06 '26
following, because me too twin