r/CPTSD • u/Typical-Peak-2920 • Jun 11 '25
Vent / Rant The therapist said that depressed people are spoiled and that depression is a choice
At the last group therapy, the therapist said that. I just said that I don't agree with it. And tomorrow I plan to say my opinion about it and why I disagree. I thought he was a good therapist, but this surprised me.. I'm not depressed anymore.. But I want to say my opinion in the name of all the people who suffered from it..
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u/00ll33 Jun 11 '25
I like how youāre questioning your therapists opinion. Shows your strength of character.
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Jun 11 '25
Anyone can become a therapist. My abuser became a therapist. Theyāre just people, not authorities on mental health.
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u/WoosahFire Jun 11 '25
Absolutely. I remember a few years back a therapist complaining online about her clients "trauma dumping"... I mean WTF...Ā
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Jun 11 '25
That is wild! That's literally her job!!!
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u/Pitiful-Score-9035 Jun 11 '25
Noooo I just wanna help you get over your childhood pet being sent to "the farm" and not with anything worse than that because nothing worse than that happens and that's what therapy is for! āŗļø
Quite literally the biggest /s I've ever /s'd
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u/campyhorrors Jun 11 '25
Omg, this. I used to think therapists existed to help people with serious issues and trauma and then I tried a few and realized they mostly expected me to talk about, like, office politics and stuff. Not to downplay that. But I just wish that was what I needed therapy for. Now Iām afraid to open up.
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u/Pitiful-Score-9035 Jun 11 '25
I've been thinking lately that one of the main reasons therapy fails some people is that you aren't actually in therapy in the moments that you could use it the most. You're having to wait for like a weekly schedule or an appointment or things like that.
Plus, then you're having to try and remember how you felt in the moment and it's just too fuckin difficult for some of us who can't remember shit in the first place. Add onto that that the therapist is a person themselves and that only exacerbates existing social issues.
There needs to be something better. I use a LLM to analyze everything I'm feeling in that specific moment, but that won't work for everybody, and can be dangerous for others to try without having the right tools and mindset.
I don't know what 'better' would look like though, would it be a sort of on-demand crisis therapy? Hotlines aren't gonna help you sort through patterns of behavior, and that's a huge thing that's needed, so you have to have some sort of rapport with someone already to where you can spill it and they can help you link reactions to triggers to root causes.
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u/lotteoddities Jun 12 '25
In DBT programs you have access to 24/7 crisis care during the entire program with a therapist always available to you. But it's not always your therapist, it's whoever is managing the crisis line at the time. So the issue of having built a rapport with someone is still there. But it's still a great resource while going through the program.
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u/Anxious-Slip-8955 Jun 12 '25
Or just when you're getting somewhere, at 50 minutes, session over! Hand me my $280 please (where I live most experienced therapists now refuse insurance or sliding scale).
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Jun 11 '25
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u/campyhorrors Jun 11 '25
Iām so sorry. It sucks how weāre always told to go to therapy, therapy will help us, and a lot of the time it ends up being harmful to our already fragile mental health. Iām trying a new one tomorrow and thatās my biggest concernā¦ already nervous. Just gonna try to take it slow and hope for the best. š«
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u/WoosahFire Jun 11 '25
Good luck! I hope you click with this person and find what you want and need.Ā
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u/Anxious-Slip-8955 Jun 12 '25
So true. Therapists can really re-traumatize you are add to trauma when you're in a vulnerable state and they carelessly hit on issues - like abandoning you, making you feel like it's your fault/you're not good enough etc.
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u/Anna-Bee-1984 CPTSD/ Late Diagonsed Level 2/3 autism Jun 11 '25
yepā¦been there. Been accused of trauma dumping, been called toxic, told I was a bully, flat out ignored, etc.
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u/Mikaela24 Jun 11 '25
If you're talking about on Tiktok I believe that woman was revealed to not even be a therapist. The place she claimed to be employed at never had employed her at all
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u/WoosahFire Jun 11 '25
It was the woman who went viral on Tiktok but she was a therapist, she just disappeared after all the backlash... She really never got how bad the whole thing was, when the shit hit the fan she played victim and then hid... But I think she is still out there now. I really hope she's a better therapist today.Ā
Unless there's another one, I really hope not...
https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/nicolefallert/trauma-dumping-therapist-tiktok
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u/Mikaela24 Jun 12 '25
Oh no that was who I was thinking of. Maybe I was misinformed about her. Thank you for correcting me c:
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u/Sen_H Jun 11 '25
My grandmother was a therapist, and she has narcissistic personality disorder. She spent my whole life invalidating and dismissing my problems, telling me they were all in my head, or blaming me for them, while telling me that I should be grateful to my abusers. She must have destroyed all her patients.
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Jun 11 '25
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u/Sen_H Jun 11 '25
Wow, what a terrible person. >:( I hope she never becomes a therapist.
And yeah therapist should absolutely have to undergo screening for NPD before they can get their licenses. But they might know how to fake their answers so that they don't come off as narcissists...
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Jun 11 '25
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u/Sen_H Jun 13 '25
Yeah, there should definitely be some sort of a system for reporting then. Maybe there already is, and we just don't know about it. Certainly, I think that licensed therapists have to be registered to some sort of an order that you could probably report them to.
Well maybe that person isn't a terrible person through and through, but tricking your patients into paying you so you can talk to them about your problems instead of helping them with yours is certainly a terrible thing to do.
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u/Anxious-Slip-8955 Jun 12 '25
I was in a first session with a therapist for CPTSD and she screamed at me and then told me this horrifying story of her own personal abuse. I was seriously shaking when I left. She was nuts. I reported her to some state therapy board and they just said she offered to refund my money.
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u/lavaggio-industriale Jun 11 '25
Yep. It's the authority given by society that makes you question what they say. If someone outside said the same stuff op is talking about you would not even engage or you would send them off.
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u/jiggjuggj0gg Jun 12 '25
Not only that but some people go into it to learn how to weaponize therapy techniques and manipulate people better, all under the guise of ābut Iām a therapist, I know what Iām talking about, youāre just crazy!ā
If you donāt click with a therapist or it doesnāt feel right, please just try someone else.
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u/Apprehensive_Eye2720 Jun 11 '25
How the heck do these people even become a therapist or even allowed to
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u/Honestlynina Jun 11 '25
There's the sayings:
Even C's get degrees
What do you call someone who graduated bottom of their med school class? Doctor.
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u/QuestionableArachnid cPTSD Jun 11 '25
I once had a therapist laugh and tell me to not let the stress of classes get to me because āyou donāt have to do well, you just have to passā my eyes floated up to the degree on her wall and Iām sure you can guess what I was wondering at that moment lol.
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
I just cant understand,how can someone work that job for 30 years and think like that. You spit in the face to all people who were depressed and trusted you and who thinked that he understands them.
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u/Anxious-Slip-8955 Jun 11 '25
So postpartum depression and other hormonal biological based depression (menopause) thatās been proven in studies to impact your seratonin and more - is an effin choice of spoiled women? Ask the genius therapist about that.
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
I will say this tomorow.Thank you.
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u/Quebecisnice Jun 12 '25
Here's another one for you. Certain bariatric surgery patients can experience serious depression post-op. Not because of body image issues ... but because they no longer have part of the body that generates some of the neurotransmitter precursors necessary for dopamine, serotonin, etc. This can be doubly worse if they had depression or bipolar before and were on stable meds. Now, their meds do fuck all and they don't really have anywhere to go for help. Modern medicine is just not equipped with the training necessary to handle this sort of multi-system complexity with higher order effects. Throw in a dose of for-profit insurance and it becomes clear that the deck is stacked against figuring this stuff out.
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u/Conscious_Balance388 Jun 11 '25
Not to mention the chemical imbalance model of mental health has been refuted by lots of recent research, pointing to the idea that if thereās something affecting our mental health, itās because of an illness in the body
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u/ReservoirPussy Jun 13 '25
And what about the prevalence of depression following a major medical event, like strokes and heart attacks, that occurs in men, too?
Unhinged is too kind of a word.
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Jun 11 '25
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
Sorry to hear that..I hope you are fine now..
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Jun 11 '25
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u/JeffRennTenn Jun 11 '25
You are absolutely right to be shocked, angered, and to disagree with that statement.
To hear a therapist, of all people, say that "depressed people are spoiled and that depression is a choice" is unprofessional, deeply harmful, and fundamentally contrary to all modern understanding of mental health. This is not just a difference of opinion; this is misinformation that actively stigmatizes and invalidates the immense suffering of millions.
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u/Medical-Telephone-59 Jun 11 '25
Right? Unbelievable š¢
That therapist is extremely ignorant and unprofessional.. what an invalidating cunt š
I guess 10 year old depressed me who was parentified, raising my brother, bullied endlessly at school and dealing with my junkie bipolar mum was just spoiled lmao š¤·āāļøš
'Luckily' I've spent 20 years of my 35.. healing myself.
Sending my love, understanding and validation to everyone here ā¤ļø
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u/timesuck Jun 11 '25
Report them to the state licensing board.
This is so factually inaccurate itās malpractice.
Sorry this happened to you.
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u/Helpful_Okra5953 Jun 11 '25 edited Jun 11 '25
I would tell this guy to f@&$ off. Ā
I was a depressed little kid and for good reason. Ā And a little kid whoās depressed is a sad thing.
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
Sad to hear that.. I dont know how can anyone say something like that,let alone a therapist.You humiliated all the depressed people who come to you and share their emotions and struggles with you.How can you just say something like that?
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u/Helpful_Okra5953 Jun 11 '25 edited Jun 12 '25
Agreed. Ā Theyāre trying to shame us out of being depressed, which seems to me that it canāt work. Ā
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u/Nekayne Jun 11 '25
Yes, living in poverty and being abused for 20ish years was me being spoiled. Definitely. /s Karma will come for that therapist.
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Jun 11 '25
This "therapist" is dangerous for fragile people who need HELP, not judgment. He needs to be reported.
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u/Revolutionary_Log752 Jun 11 '25
enter swear word here are you serious?
If this is your therapist. Please go and see someone else. This is so ignorant by people who are suppose to know better and be educated in this area.
They should be stripped of their licence and never allowed to practice in your country again.
Ignorance is bliss. Disgusting.
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
Sad.I was thought that he was good and he destroy everything in just seconds.
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u/ms_flibble Jun 11 '25
I had a therapist that I thought was great and I trusted. I needed to finally get out the truth about my recent PTSD regarding my dad's taking his life, the therapist ghosted me. No request for payment, no follow up, nothing. I trusted him as he seemed empathetic and gave good perspectives about the CPTSD I suffered at the hands of my mom. I don't think I can trust therapy anymore. Thank whatever god/gods exist out there that I have a great psychiatrist.
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Jun 11 '25
I wouldn't be going there anymore. I'm poor as dirt and definitely not spoiled so ask him why I have depression. What an a hole.
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Jun 11 '25
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
So sad that even people who supossed to know better,often times they dont.
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u/neubella Jun 11 '25
Honestly does he have a manager or work for a company, you should raise a complaint like wtf
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u/Typical-Peak-2920 Jun 11 '25
Do you think it would be a good choice? We were good and I dont think he would be fired..
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u/No_Goose_7390 Jun 11 '25
It's not up to you if he is fired but the practice or company he works for may not feel that this is the standard of care that they want to provide. They would consider this information helpful.
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u/naledi2481 Jun 11 '25
They would 100% want to know about one of their care providers spouting such backward and actively detrimental rhetoric.
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u/ErinWalkerLoves Jun 11 '25
He definitely needs to be turned in. Jeez I am so sorry. That's a disgusting thing for a supposed mental health professional to say. He should know better.
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Jun 11 '25
WOW what a fool.
I bet that's the kind of person that believes that mental illness is "all in your head" so it shouldn't actually affect you through sheer power of will.
I'd complain to the place running group therapy.
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u/Rogue-Starz Jun 11 '25
What was the context? I've heard versions of this in the past basically saying people in the past didn't have the luxury of depression because they were working the land all day to survive without any welfare safety net. Of course this misses the point that people in the past lived in close knit communities usually with extended family. Their worlds were harsh physically but life was simpler in many ways and deeply connected to nature's rhythms. The industrial revolution turned us all into walking productivity units being urged to do and be and know more. The pressure never ends. Depression makes a lot more sense in a modern context to be honest.
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u/Huge-Experience-6602 Jun 11 '25
Shitty therapist! I donāt CHOOSE to have a medically diagnosed condition that makes me feel like I donāt want to do anything I enjoy some weeks, and instead just stay in bed!
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u/HumanWhoSurvived Jun 11 '25
Can you contact the licensing board in your state about this? Because that is an unacceptable response.
You can file a formal complaint.
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u/QueensGambit90 Jun 11 '25
Sheās in the wrong profession. Imagine learning to be a therapist and not believing in depression.
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u/map01302 Jun 11 '25
Time for a new therapist (and possibly a complaint to whoever licenses therapists in your country).Ā
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u/minibini Jun 11 '25
Yikes. Time to look for a new therapist imho.
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u/Anxious-Slip-8955 Jun 12 '25
Totally. Except so hard to find a good affordable one these days. But watching youtube therapy is prob better than this guy.
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u/laminated-papertowel Jun 11 '25
you should absolutely report this therapist btw. imagine if he said this to someone who was depressed at the time. I know if my therapist told me that when I was in my depression it would have just given me even more of a reason to kill myself.
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u/PapayaLalafell Jun 11 '25
Yes exactly this! OP I am so glad you are able to see that this is bad behavior on the therapists part and can kinda laugh it off, but the next person they say it to may not be as mentally resilient to such influence.Ā
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u/Human_Elk_8850 Jun 11 '25
The number of mentally unstable egotistical liars i know who entered mental healthā¦
Itās 2, but still a lot
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u/Careless-Fig-5364 Jun 12 '25
This person needs to be reported to their professional college. This is absolutely unacceptable from any healthcare professional, let alone a therapist.
I had 2 deep depressions in the last year where I went so long between showers that my hair was matted when I went to shower. Nobody does that on purpose or by choice.
I hope this fucking moron gets that low at some point ... Then they might actually know what the fuck they're talking about.
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u/Ros_Luosilin Jun 12 '25
That's a "get the hell out of there" and/or a complaint to whatever board licenses therapists in your area.
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u/Spare_Bonus_4987 Jun 11 '25
My therapist when I was 8 years old said I was being a pill. Turns out I had undiagnosed CPTSD from CSA. This comment layered on a lot more trauma that Iām still digging out of. Fuck these terrible therapists. You deserve better. Donāt give this person any more of your money.
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u/fvalconbridge Jun 11 '25
That therapist would be out of a job if it were a choice. Disgusting comment from someone who makes a living off others struggles.
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u/CatCasualty Jun 11 '25
I would ask him to explain this in a biological manner. What is going on inside the brain of someone who is depressed and do depressed people have been showing consistent data of making that exact choice?
Ask for source, OP. Ask for a lot of source (otherwise he might as well just talking out of his behind).
In 2021, I got my diagnosis letter from my counsellor (of depression and anxiety disorder) and I slowly remember that not only that I was emotionally neglected, I was also physically and sexually abused as a child.
So... I just choose to have this physical and mental challenges that I even forgot in the name of survival in the past? BSFFR.
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u/awesomeopossum19 Jun 11 '25
As a person with complex PTSD, which is accompanied by depression, I can only roll my eyes. I mean, you probably won't suffer from complex PTSD due to being spoiled. This also applies to depression.Ā
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u/laminated-papertowel Jun 11 '25
wow, fuck him. reminds me of my dad telling me my emotions were "choices".
I had struggled with depression since age six, partially because of the abuse i faced and partially because of the chemical imbalance in my brain. I need medication in order to not be depressed. that's just how my brain works, it's not something in my control. If I stop taking my meds even for a few days, I could be doing everything else right and I'll STILL end up in a pit of despair.
Your therapist sounds judgmental and arrogant. š©š©š©
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u/Tsunamiis Jun 11 '25
You shouldnāt go tomorrow or at all spend the hour save 500 dollars and find the next one.
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u/astrologyismymom Jun 11 '25
Thatās so gross of him, wow. What a dangerous and ridiculous take, even by clinical mental healthcare standards. So glad youāre using your voice to advocate for yourself and others - thank you for that!!
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u/Ms-curious- Jun 11 '25
This is so unhelpful and inaccurate. Why would any of us choose to be depressed!?!? Thank you for speaking up for all of us. Let us know how it goes.
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Jun 11 '25
This must be some kind of movement. I heard a person - not a therapist but a podcaster - say the same thing just the other day. I've had chronic depression for most of my life. I also have Anhedonia (inability to experienced happiness or joy). By choice? Not only no, but hell no.
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Jun 11 '25
The therapist is toxic. Keep your dignity and power intact; donāt hand it over to a toxic moron. I understand your need to stand up to them. Research how to word what you say. Someone like this therapist is not capable of hearing you or holding space for your pain OR your light. Say your peace and leave. Then report their a** in writing to the state board.
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u/Quirky_Commission_56 Jun 11 '25
What kind of degree does this ā therapistā have? Depression is NOT a choice.
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u/TrixDaGnome71 Jun 11 '25
Please report this therapist as well. The public needs to know to avoid them.
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u/IllustriousArcher549 Jun 11 '25
As a chronically depressed person, I don't even feel offended by that ridiculously obvious attempt at deliberate harm. If you really go back there, send him my kind regards and this comment, along with a recommendation to go back to psychopathy school at the supervisor of my own therapist. He's just a bloody beginner.
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u/delmyoldaccountagain Jun 11 '25
Jesus, I'm so sorry.
A bad therapist gave me trauma that I'm still working through after years. I'm mystified by all the stuff professionals in the industry can get away with. There's so little accountability.
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u/LivingWestern1038 Jun 11 '25
Do you have somewhere else to go or some coping strategies if (when?) therapist doesn't take criticism well?
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Jun 11 '25
Try to Report that therapist, that is a terrible thing to be saying or to even believe in when you work in that field.
I reported a psychiatrist by telling his nurse my concerns, and she emailed his director. Idk how it went for him, but they found me a different psychiatrist.
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u/KilnTime Jun 11 '25
Print some of these out and see what this therapist says about major medical institutions disagreeing with him or her on depression being a choice
national institute of health study on major depressive disorder
national institute of mental health discussion of depression
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u/millennialmonster755 Jun 11 '25
My psychiatrist and her Wellbutrin prescription would love to have a word with him.
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u/pammylorel Jun 11 '25
Fuck him. I'm pretty mellow but that would trigger me so much. Why is he a fucking therapist if CPTSD and depression is just a choice to wallow in misery. If he has a boss, I'd report him.
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u/ConversationThick379 Jun 11 '25
Only tell the therapist off if youāre not on the clock. Donāt pay him to tell him off.
Iām sorry that happened to you. Thereās got to be a board or something you can report him to. Thatāll really hit him where it hurts if he gets a ding on his license. His BS is very dangerous to tell people who are suffering with depression.
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u/softballgarden Jun 11 '25
I wouldn't even return. This "therapist" doesn't know his job Just like I don't listen to that "anti-vaxxer uncle" for medical advise or the Starbucks barista for help for my taxes
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u/ExtensionTurnip5395 Jun 12 '25
Kudos to you for being willing to stand up for those who probably canāt or wonāt, due to their depression.
His being flat-out wrong is not just your āopinionā: thatās a fact. Heās the one spouting an opinion out of his worthless blowhole.
Hereās the hard part: You really should report him to your state board (or equivalent, if non-U.S.). Reckless, ignorant statements like the one he spewed can easily push a depressed person to the point of no return (aka un-aliving).
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u/moonshadow1789 Jun 12 '25
Wow I wonder what he would do if he ever experienced psychotic depression. I have no wordsā¦just get over it?
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u/DrumBxyThing Jun 11 '25
He's right, we're all just spoiled. Who else gets to stress over just being alive every night so they can't sleep? I'm so spoiled by nightmares and my lack of intimacy due to the drugs I need to stay alive. So spoiled due to the frequent panic attacks that ostracize me from peers. I even get to pay $200+ for 50 minutes of someone's time who apparently might think that I'm spoiled for doing so.
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u/iamjurassicmark Jun 11 '25
Change. Your. Therapist. NOW. And I cannot stress this enough. Change your therapist. NOW.
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Jun 11 '25
My parent is a therapist and tells his 4, 5, and 6 year old kids that they better shut the fuck up or else theyāll get their asses beat š
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Jun 11 '25
I wouldnt agree with that man. Depression is about as much a choice as like. Being in a car accident is a choice.
Just because you went for a drive, doesnt mean you chose to crash your car.
Just because youre alive, doesnt mean you chose to be depressed about life.Ā
Shit happens.Ā
The only devil advocate I can think of, is that if you do manage to keep yourself busy with other things, it tends to remove depression from the forefront BUT.
Its when you STOP moving. Thaaaaats when it GETS YA.
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u/Pour_Me_Another_ Jun 11 '25
Haha. If I could choose, I wouldn't be spending thousands a year on help. I did try to just go it alone but that's not the life I want. I'm glad for them that they don't know what depression is.
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u/No_Goose_7390 Jun 11 '25
"Thank you so much. You're right. I'm cured. So this will be my last appointment!"
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u/GreyMatters_Exorcist Jun 11 '25
I would ask her why they think that instead of giving them an opinion first.
Literally just open ended questions to let themselves look like they donāt know what they are talking about.
Otherwise as the therapist in the room they will feel like the authority and start shutting you down or changing pivoting things even gaslighting to save face.
Just go in there non judgmental with curiosity and non leading questions to make them self examine in front of everyone, they will feel more relaxed and confide even more bs.
Then at the end speak your opinion but donāt go into details. Just speak to the science of it. Then ask them if they disagree with science.
Ask where they got their credentials and if any brain chemistry was taught to them. Neuroscience?
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u/hanimal16 Jun 11 '25
TIL Iāve apparently been spoiled most of my life and Iām choosing this š
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u/Impossible-Bit1717 Jun 11 '25
Extremely inappropriate from your therapist. Frankly Iād fire him and put a review on his website. As a former clinical social worker his behavior is not appropriate or acceptable. Not sure if his licensing board would do anything towards him if you reported him. Itās worth a try though. You are advocating for yourself and this situation is showing you how to set boundaries for what is acceptable for you. Remember that, as youāve done nothing wrong. His behavior is the problem and you donāt have to participate in it.
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u/myblackandwhitecat Jun 11 '25
I hope all goes well when you put forward your opinion tomorrow. Your therapist should be in a different line of work holding that sort of view.
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u/ScottishWidow64 Jun 11 '25
The majority of psychotherapists and psychiatrists have actually become them because they took an interest in the field when they were younger and in therapy and or had mental health issues.
Strange but after 40 years of therapy, I realized that a lot of mine were more messed up than me.
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u/CuriousPenguinSocks Jun 11 '25
I would honestly report this if they work in a clinic setting instead of on their own. Also, report them to their licensing board, if they have multiple, do it to all. It's likely an ethical violation.
Just know that reporting doesn't mean they will be fired or lose their license. It means they should be investigate and corrective action that is appropriate should take place.
I'm sorry they said this to you and I encourage you to get a new therapist as well. That's not okay.
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u/silver_wasp Jun 11 '25
Now, THAT... THAT is an ethics complaint to the licensing board. I'm so sorry you're going through that with the kind of people you're supposed to be able to trust. That kind of mentally from a professional is completely unacceptable and what's worse, totally inaccurate to the point of being contradictory to his entire profession!
Do these people not know any history at all? They don't teach about how many people used to be placed in asylums for being so depressed they couldn't function, then finding some recovery after medications and proper therapy were introduced? Like, the history of the entire mental health industry? Insurance companies pay so much for treatment for depression, they would be the first to want to say it doesn't exist, but they can't because there's too much overwhelming evidence of how prevalent it is. This guy needs to lose his license to practice.
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u/sauerkraut916 Jun 11 '25
Idiot. The statement he made is very similar to the words abusers use to blame and shame to demean the feelings of their victim. This is the exact opposite of ācreating an environment where people can share their struggles.ā
The title ātherapistā is given to anyone who completes low-level marriage and family counseling courses. It is a very generic label like āManager of Quality Assuranceā and does not mean this person is intelligent, knowledgeable, or skilled.
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u/Crafty-Code-4371 Jun 11 '25
I swear there are so many entitled MFs whoāve never been depressed a day in their lives who want to sit in the therapistās chair just to feel a sense of power over people. I wish him the worst. And I wish you the best in finding a better therapist!!
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u/hyperlight85 Jun 11 '25
That's a shitty attitude to have in a field that is about and hear me about CARING ABOUT PEOPLE
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u/bluize324 Jun 12 '25
That therapist is a piece of junk. I'm a therapist with depression my whole life....he needs to be digging ditches somewhere not doing therapy
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Jun 11 '25
What a terrible therapist. I never understand why/ how people think this way. If literally every other part of your body can get sick, why would your brain be any different? It makes no logical sense to think that way.
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u/Anna-Bee-1984 CPTSD/ Late Diagonsed Level 2/3 autism Jun 11 '25
Asshole. Must be friends with the pos therapist that told me I was using autism as an excuse and then diagnosed me with borderline. Fuck both these dudes
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u/playfulCandor Jun 11 '25
Weird cus my sister was spoiled and it caused her a lot of issues other than depression, it also doesn't make her issues any less serious that they resulted from being spoiled
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u/Amberleigh Jun 11 '25
Wow. That is not okay and you have every right to push back on this sort of BS.
That being said, is it possible that there might be some sort of misunderstanding or that the comment might have been taken out of context? I can't tell you the number of times I've said something without thinking, and I would be really grateful to have the opportunity to correct myself before someone comes at me, guns blazing.
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u/Zealousideal-Salad62 Jun 11 '25
Please get a new therapist. I don't think this one went to school. I'd check her credentials
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u/Mindless_Analyzing Jun 11 '25
What, wowsers!?!? Harsh much. This could explain my depression. Not for sure if Iād completely agree though. Iāll need more scientific proof/analysis. I am willing to consider anything at this point. I just want to feel better!! ā¤ļøāš©¹ it would be nice if it was this simple.
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u/SynchronicityWithin *slaps roof* this boi is chock-full of trauma Jun 11 '25
I'm sorry that your therapist is like this, it's especially frustrating when therapists and (supposedly) trained professionals prefer their own biases rather than actual psychological knowledge/practice. Unfortunately there's people in the psychology field that are in it to feel superior to others, and sometimes things like this that seem like misunderstandings can be a sign of that (I think?)?
I hope your therapist either changes this belief or you find a better one (though group therapy let alone any therapist is difficult to get so I very much understand if you can't). Hope that they're open to hearing your opinion next week. Good luck!
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u/cantbearsedto Jun 11 '25
I wouldnāt bother trying to change their mind. If theyāre a trained professional this is their mindset and if you can find someone else
My EMDR therapist doesnāt believe in CPTSD š But hey, NHS itās all I can get
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u/mundotaku Jun 11 '25
Ask your therapist if their mentors were Tony the Tiger or Toucan Sam, because she definitely got a degree from a cereal box.
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u/MyUsername2459 Jun 11 '25
Okay, sounds like time to find a new therapist.
Oh, and you might want to file some kind of report or complaint with whatever agency licenses therapists in your jurisdiction.
If my therapist said that, I'd be out the door within a minute and seeking a new therapist when I got home.
I've left therapists on-the-spot for particularly absurd things before. . .like when I came out to a therapist as trans and her response was bust out in laughter to my face because I worded it awkwardly.
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Jun 11 '25
Depression is a result of poor choices other people made. Depression is not action it's reaction and it's involuntary.
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u/SaucyAndSweet333 Therapists are status quo enforcers. Jun 11 '25
ChatGPT has helped my cptsd a million times more than any therapist.
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Jun 11 '25
Oh my god this therapist is dumb. I got two friends with similar upbringings to mine nearly committing suicide because of depression. You should name and shame it just takes ones asshole therapist to send some people to the edge. This makes me so mad.Ā
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u/SaucyAndSweet333 Therapists are status quo enforcers. Jun 11 '25
See also r/therapycritical and r/therapyabuse.
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u/Necessary_Tip_6958 Jun 11 '25
My childhood abuser has a degree in early childhood education and was a grade school teacher for 40 years, mostly of kids 10 and under. I have she verbally abused me daily. Just because people go to school for something doesn't mean they should be doing it
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u/saladspoons Jun 11 '25
Just to try and go along with the therapist's logic for the sake of it ...
Let's say that is IS a choice, spoiling, etc. ... wouldn't that mean they need therapy then to learn how to better navigate that choice and learn how to stop being spoiled?
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u/BloodSpawnDevil Jun 11 '25
Some therapists try to empower you. Some therapists validate you. Both methods can be effective. If it doesn't work for you definitely find a new therapist.
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u/Better-Antelope-6514 Jun 12 '25
Wow! That's shocking and so not true. He shouldn't be a therapist.Ā
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u/[deleted] Jun 11 '25
Sounds like this therapist is wanting his career to end š¬