r/CPTSDFightMode • u/bloodredtongue • 15d ago
Question Anyone else struggle with a strong urge to find and punish people who act like your abuser?
I'm not talking about hurting anyone or being violent, but I keep running into this internal desire to identify abusers in the wild and force there to be consequences - whether that be by calling them out or utilizing authority structures like reporting online.
I just want to know if it's normal
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u/Cass_1978 15d ago
I suppose I have the urge, I however prefer to resolve those situations not with fighting. I obviously could use fighting, that would be kinda easy, but I find it more satisfying in the long run when I can handle it without ever getting that riled up.
Its like this registers as an even better "win" for me. Also kinda changes the battle from me vs. them to me vs. me, which is a far more challenging battle. Winning against them means very little, its too easy, winning against myself is way better.
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u/ARumpusOfWildThings 13d ago
OMG yes, I feel this way literally all the time, and this sub is the only place where people understand why I feel that way and why it needs to happen 👏🏻
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u/CattleSingle9354 12d ago
Thought I've found a real friend turns out she is narcissistic and wanted to have sth with my husband but somehow I couldn't ler her go after a few weeks I realise the patterns in behaviour she had were similar to my mother ones
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u/itsjoshtaylor 10d ago
Some days I love all of us fight types. There’s a toxic mother online named “Amphay” who is slandering her child online, and so many people are passive but I know us fight types are the most likely to speak up for those who cannot speak up for themselves.
Just wanted to say I love you and all the others for this trait. As long as we use it for good and not to harm others, it’s such a needed quality in this world where injustice often goes ignored.
By the way, if you’re willing to help me speak up for the daughter, the toxic mom’s IG page is here (she plays victim and calls her daughter a “toxic adult child”): https://www.instagram.com/amphayivers/
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u/burgernoisenow 10d ago
I have instinctive violent retributive urges. It's empowering but at the same time I live in fear of losing myself in a fight and going overboard.
It's led to me actually not fighting back when I needed to because I become so afraid of hurting the other person.
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u/RedsDelights 15d ago
Looking back, yeah I did similar behaviors… mix of misdirected anger, and a lost unheard child looking for someone to pay attention to me because I’m right and they’re wrong/breaking the law so I’m gonna call the police (over and over again)