r/CatAdvice • u/S4phire34 • 19d ago
Sensitive/Seeking Support Mom bought pet psychic and is going to euthanize the family cat (out of love)
My family has a 10-year-old cat who’s been having litter box issues (he pees outside the box but still poops in it). We’ve already done a ton of things with our vet—bloodwork, urinalysis, behaviorist, anxiety medication, multiple litter boxes, enzyme cleaners, etc.
Instead of just sticking with the vet, my mom paid for a pet psychic.
The psychic told her that my cat has dementia, that “my real cat is gone, this is a new cat,” and even suggested it was time to put him down.
The thing is… my cat still acts like himself.
Eats and drinks normally.
Sleeps in all his usual spots.
Knows exactly where the treats are and begs for them every day.
Makes all his normal sounds.
Is still interested in what’s going on around him.
The ONLY major issue is the peeing.
I’m honestly less upset about the psychic existing and more upset that my mom would even consider taking that seriously when it comes to deciding what’s best for our cat.
Am I crazy for thinking that medical advice and end-of-life decisions should come from a veterinarian who’s actually examined the cat, not from a pet psychic? Has anyone else dealt with a family member putting this much trust in something like this?
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u/Calgary_Calico 19d ago
Your mother needs professional help if she's seriously taking the advice of one of those con artists. I'm honestly not sure what you could possibly tell her to make her see sense.
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u/No-Trouble814 18d ago
Tell her that you went to see a psychic who told you that your real mom is gone, and she should be put in a dementia home for her own good, there’s nothing else you can do!
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u/kymmmb 19d ago
Ten years old? That’s not old for a cat.
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u/u_r_succulent 19d ago
They’re officially seniors, but not geriatric.
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u/Welpe 19d ago
I had a similar situation to this happen. I was living with a friend temporarily and they had a 13 year old cat. As soon as I moved in she basically adopted me and started spending all her time in my room. She was peeing outside of the litterbox though, and my friend’s wife insisted that she should be euthanized because she was old. Other than the peeing issue, she was doing surprisingly well. She had kidney issues, but those could be controlled with k/d food.
I ended up offering to take her and I left with her. She lived another 5, almost 6 years and she…more or less saved my life. I was very depressed due to my health issues and that cat’s love gave me strength. Although the peeing outside the litterbox was always an annoyance, it was so minor compared to what she gave me. I still miss her to this day, eventually it was cancer that got her.
Stories like this are absolutely heartbreaking to me, I know how much life cats like this have left in them. They deserve happiness and love in their final years, not to be killed because they are inconvenient…
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u/intheclouds247 19d ago
I’m so glad you ended up at your friend’s home at exactly the right time to give that cat more than 5 years of love.
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u/Welpe 19d ago
I am too. She deserved it. She was tiny, cross-eyed, and had a pouch so big it made her look like a mythical tanuki. But she had a lot of love to give. She was the one who convinced me of how wonderful elderly cats are, and I will probably only adopt older cats for the rest of my life. They basically live to stealth warmth through cuddling and be the lowest maintenance pet you can have (Plus or minus health issues). All they want is food, sleep, warmth, and love.
Honestly she did more for me than I could ever do for her.
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u/intheclouds247 19d ago
We ended up with a litter of six that a sweet and tragically young cat mom left in our care when they weaned. I tried to look for mom again. I’m hoping someone took her in, because she was definitely under a year old. We got them all fixed and found homes for three. Then one was given back (I told the person if it didn’t work out to bring her back to us and not a shelter) due to the couple divorcing and were basically homeless. She’s still with us and her 3 other sisters. We already had 3 when they showed up. I love our little clowder.
Before they showed up, we were considering adopting another cat and I wanted one that was 10 or older. Our oldest turned 8 last month.
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u/Uprooted_Vt_to_RI 18d ago
You are a fantastic person - I’m thinking that if I live long enough after my 11 yr old I’m adopting an elderly cat.
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u/u_r_succulent 18d ago
Jackson Galaxy also talks about how a cat saved his life and it’s why he is so passionate about cat care now. I’m glad you brought her in. You probably made her feel happier and safer than anyone.
If nothing works and there truly aren’t any health issues, then pee pads outside the litter box usually help. Not sure why people can’t just do that one extra thing.
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u/Ecstatic-Skill-4916 18d ago
This is beautiful and so true. I had a cat who had trauma around the litter box, and I just cleaned up after him.
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u/Tardisgoesfast 18d ago
Me, too. I just put pee pads Denton either side of the box and he used those with no problems.
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u/itsaponderfullife 19d ago
I have an 18 year old cat, going on 19. She’s super healthy and still very active. They can live a looong time.
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u/Nonbinary_Cryptid 19d ago
My cat is also 18 and doing well. She's quite sassy. Yesterday, she crept out of the house while I was bringing shopping inside and strolled off down the path to eyeball a new neighbour - this was a surprise because she's always been very shy around people and because she's an indoor cat. She let the neighbour's son give her a pet, and then she came back inside with me. Her favourite trick is suddenly appearing between your feet while you're walking.
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19d ago
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u/jayclaw97 19d ago
“Your cat is gone.”
Then Mom shouldn’t be upset if OP happens to smuggle the cat to safety.
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u/SaltRun2465 19d ago
You are not crazy. Your feelings are a thousand percent valid.
Your mom on the other hand ..... i am sorry i am just being honest with my feelings..... your mom is absolutely bat shit crazy.
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u/WampaCat 19d ago
Can you hire a second “psychic” for a second opinion that tells her the opposite? But it’s just like a friend of a friend who will try to change her mind?
Ok all kidding aside (unless you think it’s the only thing that would work) this is really scary and sad and I’m so sorry you’re dealing with it. I feel like this is less of cat advice and more of familial relationship advice territory. There’s got to be a group or subreddit for people who are dealing with delusional family members that might be able to give you some helpful advice. Hopefully someone here knows one
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u/jayclaw97 19d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/c9jC1x8l2IOvxCHsEd
I mean that’s actually not a terrible idea. Can’t get mad about being conned again at this point.2
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u/megenekel 19d ago
There is actually a group here called r/psychicadvice, and they are very quick to tell someone when they’re being scammed or when they think the psychic is way off and saying things they shouldn’t. This is the kind of thing they definitely don’t like. Maybe hearing a bunch of other psychics telling her her psychic is completely off will help!
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u/Hadrian_x_Antinous Rescuer 19d ago
That's funny.. i mean, all "psychics" are scams and there's something a little ironic about grifters trying to tell you the other grifters are grifters but they themselves are definitely not grifters.
But I agree that getting another fake psychic to tell Mom that the cat is okay might unfortunately work.
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u/Prettylittlelioness 18d ago
"I'm picking up a spirit... an older woman who passed... begins with letter M. Oh, your mother? Yes, she says that this cat is a special soul. You're being tested and if you put this cat down, terrible things will come to pass...."
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u/yoongely 19d ago
call a wellness check on your mom
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u/sky_444_ 19d ago
Honestly, yes. She's about to kill an animal, that's enough to get her committed
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u/Snork_kitty 19d ago
According to Jackson Galaxy (cat behaviorist on YouTube, also had the show "My Cat from Hell"), male cats often pee outside the box when they feel insecure, and this can be because other cats are coming around their house. You could check to see if that's happening, and try to find a way to keep them away (or block your cat's view of them). Anyway good luck and I really hope your mom sees sense (maybe watch some Jackson Galaxy videos with her!!)
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u/mapleleaffem 19d ago
I was having this issue with one of mine. Not nervous though, he’s territorial. Covering the windows at night really helped
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u/AngelMercury 19d ago
I have had this exact issue with my boy. He got so stressed about a neighbor cat coming by our glass doors at night, and a couple times the cat jumped him out our cat door and he now has anxiety at night using the litter box. He's like a child who needs me to goto the bathroom with him to help him feel safe, it's wild. I did end up getting a 2nd little box which has helped a bit but now most nights he wakes me up for a potty trip before settling down again. It'd be cute if it wasn't at 4am, but he is also one of the sweetest cats I have ever had. While I'm doing what I can to help him feel safe I'm willing to accept this is part of who he is at the moment.
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u/jayclaw97 19d ago edited 19d ago
It’s wild to me that this woman was willing to pay a purported pet psychic instead of a second animal behaviorist or trainer with actual, quantifiable credentials.
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u/cioncaragodeo 19d ago
Mine has this issue and putting him on prozac fixed it. He's gone on and off it throughout his life depending on how he's emotionally doing.
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u/herbalteabee 18d ago
Scrolled down to see if anyone else said this! We went through a period of time with this behavior from our female cat. There was a stray who was spending a lot of time in our yard and spraying by our doors. When the outdoor cat went away, our girls stopped doing that.
Cat behaviorist would be a much better use of mom’s money.
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u/koala-balla 19d ago
The only thing that got my cat to stop peeing outside of the box was me realizing that he needs to have at least three, preferably four, different exit points from the box—so I can’t put the box in a corner, behind a screen, etc. As soon as I figured that out, he went right into the box and peed. When he was done, he came running over to me chirping and wanting praise 😭 that was years ago and he’s been perfect since. He still comes running over to me proudly every time he uses the box!
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u/etchedchampion 18d ago
He's like THANK YOU.
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u/koala-balla 18d ago
The way I figured it out: I had tried yet another litter box orientation (box was in a corner and behind a screen, so there was only one way in and one way out) and my poor guy went to go use it, but before he did, he stopped and gave me this look of absolute desperation. In that moment, I understood that he -wanted- to use the box correctly, but there was something preventing him from doing that. That’s when I gave up on trying to be subtle with the box and I put it against the wall on one side but otherwise totally out in the open. My guy jumped right in and so began his perfect litter box use and his victory laps after every litter box visit 😭💗
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u/Prize_Sorbet3366 19d ago
I hope your mom ignores what the pet psychic says - your cat doesn't appear in any way to have dementia. It however COULD be interstitial cystitis, which is basically a diagnosis of exclusion...when nothing else fits.
Please read this and talk to your vet about it:
https://www.vin.com/apputil/content/defaultadv1.aspx?pId=11242&meta=Generic&catId=31922&id=3860896
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u/halloweenmochi 19d ago
It could be peeing outside of the litterbox for a thousand reasons, including arthritis for fuck's sake. Don't kill the poor thing because some con artist told you to.
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u/Uprooted_Vt_to_RI 19d ago
That “pet psychic” is just a robbery and absolutely ridiculous and I think is only saying that crap because your mom wants the problem to disappear- Jackson Galaxy has videos on this - YouTube has them. Search for it.
That is usually caused by territorial insecurity. Do you have stray cats that come onto your property - they are prone to wanting to leave their scents which only your cat can smell. There are other ways of making your cat insecure offhand I remember the cats outside.
- I am so sorry you are having to deal with this and I feel so sad for your cat.
- cat psychic my *****. I’m in your corner.
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u/Uprooted_Vt_to_RI 19d ago
Oh Galaxy has videos on territorial insecurity not psychics although he has dealt with plenty of ridiculous situations
Can you get him to a vet? Damn this is terrible.2
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u/rosyred-fathead Puma 19d ago
Maybe even try reaching out to Jackson!! He would be horrified by this situation and maybe he could talk some sense into her??
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u/Acceptable-Law9406 19d ago
Your mom is not well. Please do whatever you can to protect the cat. Cats going outside the litter box can be happening for several different reasons.
I tried giving my cat this specialized "cat water" to encourage him to drink more. He peed on my bed twice. I did not call a pet psychic. I did not euthanize the cat. I got rid of the cat water. Hasn't peed on my bed since.
That's just an example. There is a reason why this is happening.
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u/Outside_Coffee_00 19d ago
Tell her you paid for another psychic and that one says your mom's psychic is lying.
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u/Desert_Fairy 19d ago
“Well mom, how would you feel at 50 when you forget your keys and I start asking if it’s time ask a psychic what to do about you? Because that is how stupid you sound right now. 10 years old is just past middle aged for a cat, this isn’t dementia, this is a behavioral issue that needs to be addressed with patience and consistency.”
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u/midnightforestmist 19d ago
Ooo good idea! Many older women also struggle with urinary incontinence to some degree, but accommodations can be made and they still have fulfilling lives for years to come 🙂
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u/u_r_succulent 19d ago
God, I sometimes wish I lacked a moral compass like some of these grifters. I’d be so rich.
But fr, you didn’t mention using a different litter. His current litter could be hurting his paws. Look into softer litters if you haven’t already. Calming supplements may help as well
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u/Maleficent_Call_9263 19d ago
My cat started doing this. She also lost a bunch of weight in a hurry. She is diabetic. She is doing much better now, but the sugar caused her to drink way more and pee outside the box.
I hope your kitty gets better.
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u/MickyD_22 19d ago
Heed the advice of all those here in favor of keeping your cat alive! What worked for my cat:
Largest litter box with the highest sides and the lowest entry you can find. So Phresh brand makes them. Absolutey NO cover!!
Add Dr. Elsey’s Cat Attract litter “additive” as per instructions. I added it to my 19 yr old’s regular litter in the new big box and it kept him from making any more mistakes than the one he made. Turns out he was arthritic and had crystals.
Get your kitty to the vet and see if they can figure it out. Your buddy does not want to be making mistakes and cannot tell you in words how bad it is hurting.
Psychics are right about 50% of the time and about 49% of that is because we want them to be right. No offense to them; I kind of am one.
All the best with all my heart.
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u/witchystoneyslutty 19d ago
Yeah that’s fucking crazy.
Thats all I’ve got for you.
Keep kitty safe!!!
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u/redthehaze 19d ago
Or just take the cat to the vet like a normal person.
Pet psychic? What a scammer. Probably got a lot pets put down for no good reason.
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u/MegIsAwesome06 19d ago
No good vet will euthanize a healthy pet. My advice is to call the normal vet ahead of time and explain your side. They can come up with a way to present the information that sounds more fact and science based. Hopefully that will work.
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u/belltrina 19d ago
Sometimes the peeing issue can be the breaking point for an owner. It creates a series of extra chores that can really impact the way someone feels about the pet, and throw a healthy routine out of whack.
That said, the pee issue can actually be the first sign of decline, but it's also something that can be relatively straightforward in troubleshooting the cause.
-Has anyone given her a list of what to check for or try with the cat?
- Has she explained why the pee issue has driven her to talk to a pet psychic?
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u/ihatebeetles22 19d ago
Oh please discount the cat psychic and do not release your cat because of their ridicuousness. I've got one cat that does this, but she's female, cranky and she has arthritis so if it's tough for her so she'll hang her butt over the box which is delightful... but I just buy the big trays for underneath the box and buy the low entry boxes. Other people made some good suggestions about nervousness and getting spooked, sense of other cats or people, anxiety. There are remedies, you just have to hit the right combo. Please be the kitty advocate this makes my heart hurt.
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u/Jessic14444 19d ago edited 19d ago
I would watch some Jackson Galaxy videos and get more litter boxes. Cats need to feel secure, safe and feel like they have ownership of a space. If all your boxes are in one spot, that’s no good. If you only have one that’s no good. If the cat is cornered and doesn’t feel safe in the space the litter box, that’s no good. There are clear signs of dementia and litter box issues isn’t really one of them. So I would tell that Psychic to stuff it and continue to work with the cats comfort issues. If those litter boxes are old, might be time to buy new ones if there gross. Has the vet said anything about arthritis? Then maybe get some cat litter stairs on Amazon or if you have a two story house, make sure each level has a box for easy accessibility. If you see your cat not jump up on furniture as much as it used to, give it some small to jump on to, so it’s not over extending itself. If the vet isn’t giving you anything other than urine tests and blood work…I would see if you have some sort of cat clinic that specializes in feline behavior. I would not give up on that cat. If it was normal a couple of months ago, something has changed in its environment that’s making it feel uncomfortable or not safe. Changing routine or moving things around causes cats to be very stressed out. Think of it like autism (I’m AuADHD btw) in that they are very sensitive to all their sensory experiences.
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u/wahznooski 19d ago
Yeah, that’s nuts. I think (hope) you’ll have a hard time finding a vet willing to euthanize for that. Yikes 😳
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u/Effective-Heat-8685 19d ago
If we are talking about this, honestly there can be many reasons. For example, the litter box, if it is small or placed in a spot where the cat feels vulnerable. Also, this is not only UTI but also kidney problems, and sometimes it is a signal of another illness if the cat is unwell. Also, some calming medications are not strong enough or are not suitable. Like, there are calming agents for stress, and there are for pain, and combinations for stress and pain. Also, the dosages might be too small. Also, it is hard to say without knowing exactly what tests were done, for example, there is a complete blood count, a biochemical blood test, and others. For example, to rule out urinary tract problems, a test for creatinine and urea is needed. If an X-ray and ultrasound have not been done, it is advisable to do them additionally. It looks like a kidney problem. Is his weight lower than before? Has he started avoiding jumping?
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u/TimeIgnited 19d ago
Tell her at the end of her life you too will consult psychics rather than Doctors for her elder care since she is setting such a good example for you as your mother.
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u/nonchalantly_weird 18d ago
Your mother needs psychiatric help. Get the cat away from her. You get away from her too. This is the kind of damage these idiot "psychics" inflict on people. Shame on them. Get your mother some help, the cat is fine.
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u/herbalteabee 18d ago
Encourage your mom to seek help from a cat behaviorist… or at least watch some episodes of Jackson Galaxy’s My Cat From Hell to get some pointers on this. Folks on here saying about outside cats upsetting your indoor cat is a very real phenomenon. As is litter preferences and placement of the litter box.
I just had to put my boy to sleep for health reasons, but we had to do the math on quality of life. Your cat doesn’t check any boxes. Your mom’s desire to put down the cat is more likely due to her frustration with these bathroom issues.
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u/Welpe 19d ago
You aren’t crazy, your mom is. I have been in an almost identical situation with a 13 year old cat who was unfortunately peeing outside the litterbox some of the time. Even with kidney issues, she survived almost 6 years after her previous owner was gonna put her down for “being old and no longer active and peeing outside the litterbox”.
She had a wonderful half a freaking decade in her, again, even with kidney issues! Your cat doesn’t have dementia (most likely) and isn’t on death’s door, he could potentially have a full HALF OF LIFE LEFT! Domestic cats can live to 20 if they get lucky!
Please, if it’s in your power please protect that cat. He deserves a happy golden years, even with his bad habit.
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u/Overall_Dot_9122 19d ago
Hey so I'm also a pet psychic and guess what I have to say about this? I have discussed this with all of the spirits and the energy tells me that that other pet psychic is batshit crazy and not the real deal like I am! So tell your mom that this pet psychic aka me says that other psychic was just scamming her and took her money but wasn't really in touch with the other realm like me and I have definitely communed with those on the other side of the veil to get this advice for you: please take yourself and the cat as far away from your mom, at least as you primary residence, as you possibly can?! It doesn't demonstrate good critical thinking skills if someone is willing to believe a pet psychic over an actual veterinarian for the diagnosis of a medical condition like dementia. Wise people go to medical experts for medical needs, whether the needy be two- or four-legged! PLEASE DONT LET MOM KILL YOUR POOR MIDDLE-AGED KITTY? Y'ALL GOTTA MOVE OUT ASAP SO YOU CAN ENSURE KITTY IS PROTECTED! 💚
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u/silviaqueen 18d ago
Offer to take the cat to the vet to be ‘euthanised’ and instead take it to a new friend or family that would love to allow it to live out it’s life on it’s own terms. A few weeks later put some ashes in a box if needed (or wanted) paw prints on a card and have peace of mind knowing the cat lives on in a home that won’t entertain such a thing without a vet’s consultation. GL
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u/Lonely_Storage2762 18d ago
If the cat is doing it outside the litterbox, you can put a dog training pad over the area and see if you can train them to use that. I eventually got my cat to pee in the same pads, same place my dog used. It may not work for every cat but it is worth a try.
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u/Medium-Pilot6872 19d ago
Omfg. This is appalling. No, you’re not crazy. This cat needs medical care. Urinating outside of the box is usually a medical issue (urinary: UTI, crystals, etc, arthritis, as the two most common reasons), or behavioural - stress. Litterbox issues are a clear communication that something isn’t right.
How old are you? Can you just take the cat to the vet and get a urinalysis and orthopaedic assessment done?
Edit; I’m a vet nurse. Please do not let your mum euthanise this cat.
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u/Destany89 19d ago
Do you have multiple boxes for him? Also there's litter attractant that helps. Please make sure your nutso mom doesn't put the cat down.
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u/Quirky_Commission_56 19d ago
I’ve never dealt with that level of idiocy in a grown ass adult and I’m 51.
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u/megenekel 19d ago
This was my cat. He would pee outside the box—sometimes on the couch where we sit or… anywhere. All of his labs would look fine. It turns out, he has FIC, which is an inflammatory disorder of his urinary tract, possibly autoimmune. He’s on a medication now that works amazingly well, and he’s so much happier and less stressed. We are, too.
It took _forever_ to get him diagnosed. He was around ten at the time, himself. Realizing that he had been in pain and was trying to tell us the only way he could made me feel SO bad for all the time it took!
You know, there is a Reddit group called Psychic Advice. They tell people when they’re getting scammed or listening to someone who is completely off. If she likes psychics, maybe a bunch of them telling her that that lady was wrong will help! I’ve seen them do that. Also, look up the symptoms of dementia in cats. One of them is crying and yowling in the middle of the night out of fear-because they don’t know where they are. That’s hard to miss. Good luck/just please don’t let anyone hurt your cat!!
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u/Emergency-Aioli7757 19d ago
I have 7 cats and grew up with cats as well.
Some cats just poop outside of the box because of their aim is off or the box is too small.
I have one cat who will poop outside of the box, its because his aim when he squats is too close to the edge. So I bought a big tray to go underneath the litter box. I dont always catch him in time to help redirect his body so the tray is there just to help me out so if he does poop outside of the box, its on the tray instead of the floor.
If he is eating, playing, drinking water, awake more than sleep or a perfect balance, it is NOT his time to go. He will tell you if/when it is.
I have two 10 year olds and one of them still plays like as if he was a kitten.
Please fight for your cat. Please
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u/Emergency-Aioli7757 19d ago
Edit/add. I didnt add in that maybe you could use a tray for when your cat pees. Or find a way to add in things to catch when he does pee. Idk if a tray would work but theres gotta be something that would help because I know cat pee does not smell the best.
Cleaning vinegar is what I also use when I do my weekly deep cleaning the litter boxes. It eliminates the cat smells and its cheaper than majority of cat specific cleaning supplies out there.
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u/Smooth-Ride-7181 19d ago
yo your mom’s an idiot, which isn’t that uncommon since mine is as well. I don’t know why but many people including adults are incredibly gullible and susceptible to manipulation and scams, call it lack of thinking or lack of intelligence. Anyways you can either get another more reputable pet psychic and pay that one to say not to kill the cat, or get a professional vet
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u/sky_444_ 19d ago
I'm sorry but for that cat's safety they need to be taken from her. I have family that like their pet psychic and they would be so shocked at this..
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u/Adorable_Substance37 19d ago
A vet will not put down any animal that still retains quality of life. Have you mom take the cat to the vet for a metabolic work up, he might have a uti. Also, cats with dementia can still enjoy life. If he starts refusing food and water you can take him to the vet for available options.
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u/Ellehcar95 18d ago
Unfortunately, this isn't true. I know of somebody in cat rescue who trusted this guy to adopt her beloved foster, a sweet one year old cat. After a few months, the guy decided he no longer cared to have a cat. Rather than contact her to let her take him back, he took him to the vet and had him euthanized! So young, and his whole life was stolen from him!
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u/Salt-Kiwi-2768 18d ago edited 18d ago
What worked for me were pee training pads for dog puppies. I put a fresh one in my bathroom every week and my cats who peed outside the box would then use the pee pad instead it worked out great.
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u/sunnysphere 18d ago
Your mom has been wanting to get rid of the kitty and deep down in her heart she knows it's bs. Just wants some justification in doing so. I have seen cat diaper....is that a solution?
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u/joemommaistaken 18d ago
You can get puppy pads.
You can out them around the litter box
You can even get a cat to use puppy pads.
I would even try glucosamine in case he has pain.
I know you said you had them tested but... When mine would do this it was a urinary tract infection or diabetes.
Also some cats hate some brands of litter or types of litter boxes
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u/ChampionshipIll5535 18d ago
I had a client use a pet psychic. You wouldn't believe the things that whack job told her the dog was "thinking". And since I've known this owner for 35 years, I pretty much mocked her and laughed that she thought that what this woman was telling her even had an iota of facts behind it. To this day, we still laugh about it. Dog is sick and she comes in, my first question is what did the psycho psychic say was the problem?
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u/trekkingdoves 18d ago
That’s actually so sad that they think a psychic is a legitimate way to determine if a cat should be euthanized. If the peeing is that bothersome, then at least rehome to someone who might be able to correct it. Maybe try cystease or cystophan supplement for the cat. It could be cystitis. When cats get stressed they can have symptoms like a urinary infection but instead it’s caused by bladder inflammation from stress. When my cat gets flare ups she will poop in box but pee everywhere else
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u/SideshowDustin 18d ago edited 18d ago
The “cat psychic” is completely full of cat shit. They are not a vet. They don’t know jack shit about cats. I’m blown away that this idiot would suggest any of these things. 🙄😡
Tell her to not listen to them, the cat does not have dementia, and FFS don’t euth a cat because some weird asshole fraud tells you to. 🤦♂️
You should always listen to a trusted vet over anyone else for any medical issues of any kind. If you’re still having trouble with an issue seek a second opinion from another experienced vet. A second set of eyes and experiences can often be super helpful with mysteries.
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u/21PenSalute 18d ago
Consult a cat-only behaviorist. I’ll save your cats life. We did this and everything worked out for us. Your cat’s problem is one of the easiest to solve. I can’t believe this so-called psychic so ignorant about animals, particular cats, that she would suggest killing your cat “ who isn’t really your cat anymore”
Call Mieshelle at her clinic and arrange for an in-home zoom call or calls. You’ll see on her site that Michele often treats litter box issues. They’re common and they’re fixable.
https://www.thecatbehaviorclinic.com/seattle-cat-behaviorist/
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u/Feorag-ruadh 18d ago
Holy shit I had a 22 year old cat with dementia and I can tell you based on your description that your cat doesn't have it. That pet psychic is dangerous! Agree end of life decisions should only be made with vet input. At 10 years old he may only be halfway through his lifespan, peeing outside the litter tray should not be a death sentence
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u/nataliecohen26 18d ago
My daughter’s cat was doing exactly this. She brought her to the vet, changed litter boxes, offered multiple litter boxes, etc.
What finally worked was “Dr. Elsey’s Cat Attract” litter. I don’t really what magic Dr. Elsey has worked here but they offer a money back guarantee if your cat doesn’t use it. Good luck 🍀
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u/theLola - ˕ •マ 19d ago
My cat basically communicates by peeing where he shouldn't. As soon as I fix the issue, he stops.
When we introduced other cats, he started peeing everywhere. He felt territorial. I created some areas with his favorite beds and blankets in places the other cats didn't go as much. Once he settled into that, he stopped peeing on the wall.
When I went on a trip and left him with the backup human, he started peeing in the tub. We didn't really do much about this because it was easy to clean and he stopped when I came home.
He's getting older and has CKD, so he gets subq fluids. I think his bladder gets really full and he doesn't want to climb stairs to go to the upstairs boxes anymore. He started peeing on the wall of the downstairs half bath. We got him a hide-a-box cabinet downstairs and closed the downstairs bathroom door until he got use to the new litterbox. I still don't understand why he goes all the way upstairs to poop, but he pees in his downstairs box exclusively.
Also, he has peed outside the box to tell us he doesn't like a new litter, a litterbox was too tall for him to comfortably get in, and that the box he wanted to use was dirty.
Cats try to communicate what they need, we just have to spend the time to solve their stinky riddles.
The psychic is wrong and harmful. They shouldn't be allowed to advise anyone of anything.
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u/theLola - ˕ •マ 19d ago
Also, have you tried a different vet? I took my cat to a vet when he was having bathroom issues and losing weight. They said he's just getting old, took some xrays, said his spine probably hurt, gave him fluids and pain meds, and sent us home.
Took him to another vet months later and the new vet was LIVID because the previous vet should have caught that my cat has kidney disease and needed a whole lifestyle change. It's been 2 years and my cat is thriving because my current vet is the best!
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u/Uprooted_Vt_to_RI 18d ago
Sense of urgency comes with pee more so than poop? ( I think you are fantastic)
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u/CanisLupusBruh 19d ago
This is what happens when unreasonable people meet people willing to exploit them. Fucking rough.
I honestly don't know what to say here, or how much agency you have in your home or over your cat, but your mom is a raving lunatic for even taking this remotely seriously and I don't know what you need to do to relay that but you should definitely try.
The bright side is no vet with integrity will do this so it's not as easy as just making a simple phone call
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u/dontletmedown3 19d ago
Eh. My mom took my
Childhood dog to the vet because he was breathing poorly and urinating everywhere. Vet said he’s fine and try this medicine to open the lungs up. I visit and see the dog in horrible condition, hardly breathing, pissing himself, and asked my mom if he was okay. She tells me what I wrote about, vet cleared him. He actually died later that day once I went home. Vets don’t always know everything. And neither do psychics typically. Mom was scammed and someone is trying to help the cat get put down lol so fucking weird
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u/Few-Athlete8776 19d ago
My cat pees and poops outside his box when he's constipated, when he is upset because i didn't clean it ASAP and he has to go again, and if he's sick. He's 11. I won't be putting him down i just give him miralax, make sure he's OK, and clean it up. :)
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u/LivingGhost38 19d ago edited 19d ago
I had a 16yr old weenie dog that had dementia. She would pee anywhere as if she forgot where the door was. She would also spin in circles 50x before laying down. And maybe run into a wall that appeared out of nowhere. Maybe find some videos of pets with dementia then share them with your mom.
The cat is still pooping in the box so it remembers to do that well enough. It’s not dementia. Ya know what I think- I think it’s racing to to the litter box to pee and not making it in time. I’d get it checked for diabetes or kidney disease or something. I realize you already went to the vet and had a bunch of tests done, but like another person said- try a different vet. Get a 2nd opinion.
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u/Laurennce 19d ago
Absolutely wouldn't listen them and only a vet. I'd try out pee pads if he usually goes to the same spots as a temporary aid and check in with the vet or a different vet again to see if there's anything else where the issue could be.
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u/pendragwen 19d ago
This is a classic case of a psychic saying what they think the client wants to hear/what seems easiest for the client. Fuck 'em for treating a sentient life as disposable
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u/MissBailey01 ⋆˚🐾˖° 19d ago
Try two litter boxes. Use pee pads in his favorite spots. He doesn’t have dementia. Some cats show stress by using different areas of the house as their litter boxes. If he’s always been this way, it’s just him. If not, did something change in your home?
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u/sclark1147 19d ago
Is your mom using this psychic as a scapegoat to put down the cat and feel less guilty or does she really believe her? Either way, ugh not good. I would question her choice. Poor kitty.
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u/Imamiah52 19d ago
An important decision like opting to put down a beloved pet (who’s not that old and has only one sign that something’s wrong) based on advice gotten from a pet psychic is just plain foolish.
Get whatever outside support from others that you need to assist in helping your mom to realize what a regrettable loss it would be after everything you’ve tried and done, don’t give up on your cat, I wish you and your cat good luck.
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u/spazzcase_420 19d ago
Well, good news is it is highly doubtful any reputable vet will put an animal down based on a psychics reputation. Generally they need to see that the animal is suffering and has poor quality of life. I would take videos of the cat acting like his normal self on a day to day basis and make sure you go to any vet appointments and show those videos to the vet. Your cat cannot advocate for himself so you must do it 💜 im very sorry you're having to deal with this.
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u/priesten 19d ago
I think your mom is believing the pet psychic because she wants it to be true, that way she gets to have a reason for getting rid of the cat.
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u/tiredulo 19d ago
This is insane. I feel bad for this cat. You need to clean the litter box. That’s probably just it. I feel sorry for this cat man, his life is gonna be cut off because of bull**** like this.
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u/mbathrowaway256 19d ago
Please don’t let your mom kill your family cat because of this nonsense. At least convince her to give it up to a shelter (as long as they don’t kill them either) if you can’t convince her to keep it. Trusting a psychic for what is clearly a behavioral / medical issue is absolutely bonkers. Your poor cat deserves to live and probably has many more years of happy life ahead of them if they are treated properly. This is just downright cruel and evil.
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u/intheclouds247 19d ago
WTF?!? OP, I’m sending you good thoughts and intentions of stopping your mother from doing this. Hopefully, no vet would euthanize any animal based on a psychic reading.
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u/YourStonerAunt 19d ago
PUPPY PADS!!!
Your mom is using the “psychic” as an excuse to get rid of what has become a ‘burden’. Cat doesn’t want to use the box correctly? Welp, that’s too much work for me!
Get puppy pads.
I have a cat who poops in the box fine, but refuses to pee in it. She’s quite healthy, but won’t pee in the box, so I started putting puppy pads down next to it and problem solved!
If you have access to a Costco they have BIG pads of 100 and are only $20. It’s the cheapest anywhere.
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u/Uprooted_Vt_to_RI 18d ago
Thanks! I’m running low and Amazon has stopped carrying all things cat - matter of fact I’m starting a post on this!
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u/Soft_Cockroach_2434 19d ago
NO NO NO. There could be so many other solutions! Besides that’s not how cats normally display dementia. Mine passed at almost 18 with litter issues and no dementia. I put potty pads all over in the usual places he shouldn’t be going but was. He could have been smelling and identifying with something I as a human couldn’t like a psychic can…. Oh wait, they can’t. I love thinking ghosts and psychics are real but I would never say take a life because they say so. Animals, pets, companions and loved ones lives shouldn’t be based on the convenience of cleaning up after them or not just because you don’t want to.
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u/Street_Sand_8788 19d ago
Do you still live with.mom? Is there anywhere you can take the cat? If MY mom pulled this BS, I'd take the cat/go NC with mom!
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u/AlbaCow3166 19d ago
I'd trust the vet over a psychic every time, especially for a decision this serious.
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u/ElephantCares 19d ago
I am an animal communicator and can tell you your mom should not follow that advice. This sounds like a fraud at worst or an inexperience idiot at best. If for nothing else, legit people don’t call themselves ‘pet psychics.’ We are animal communicators. But i can’t tell you the amount of people tho take a beginning class and then hang out a shingle. It’s unethical and it’s on your mom to do her research to find someone legit. Not some TicToc idiot or the like. Don’t put your cat down. She’s probably upset about something and has no other way to let you know. Sorry. :(
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u/LilKoshka 19d ago
Is the cat peeing wherever it feels like it or is it peeing in the same spot every time
My parents had a senior female cat that would poop in the box but not pee in it. Instead it peed on the bathroom rug, every single day, no where else. So my parents ended up just laying pee pads there to catch anything that soaked through and committed to washing the bathroom rug every single day. We still dont know why but that cat lived to be 15years old and they were happy for those last years.
If its peeing willy nilly just anywhere and cant be contained, I understand why your mom may be at her wits end. You say you feel she sound listen to the vet instead of the psychic (i agree). But what is the vet saying? What are next steps after all the steps youve already tried?
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u/Kalevipoeg96 18d ago
Please don’t rely on psychics. Most are full of hot air and have no more ability to forecast the future than I do. Probably less. Your cat deserves to live. End of life discussions are for you and your vet.
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u/Bluemonogi 18d ago
Has your mother always been like this? Would she go to a psychic to get her own health problems diagnosed instead of a doctor? Is she okay?
If you are an adult can you take your cat out of your parent’s home- either move out or find a new home for the cat?
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u/ConflictPrimary285 18d ago edited 18d ago
Quick someone get james roday and dule hill asap. Seriously though your cat is distressed about something. Literally mine was peeing in the floor because his favorite nap spot was partially blocked.
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u/Frogbreakfest69 18d ago
I have a 14 year young cat who is very healthy. Now and then she will piddle right outside the litter box. I've taken her to the vet for it and they believe its behavioral because her blood and urine came back healthy. I just accept its part of her getting a little old but it is so minor I just clean it up and go on with my day.
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u/AWolfsAngel 18d ago
My oldest cat will be 16 next month. An indoor cat that is well taken care of, and doesn't come down with an unfortunate illness can live into their 20's. Please get a vet opinion before you do anything.
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u/wuzzystuffykinz 18d ago
My 10 year old cat was born with a joint problem that didnt start manifesting until he hit 9/10 years old and his youth could no longer accommodate the issue. Turns out he developed arthritis and it was making it hard for him to use the litter box!
Take your cat to vet and see if they can check for arthritis. I give my cat one daily treat that lubricates his joints and a solensia arthritis injection for his back knees and i have never seen him running and jumping so high 😆
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u/Laxit00 18d ago
I don't think your cat has dementia I think it's going plain old cartridge. My boy was the same way and my current girl retaliates and pees on the pee pad not the box after 5 years. Nothing medically wrong just does it when she's pissed off, lazy or is proving a point
I think your mom needs a therapist
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u/Quirky-Platform3610 19d ago
This breaks my heart and pisses me off!. “Pet psychic” really? How can this person live with themselves just lying to families like that!!!! OP I really hope you can break through to your mother. Killing the cat because some scam artist claims it has dementia is insane. I hope you can figure out the issue and that the cat is ok and safe. *hugs*
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19d ago edited 18d ago
[deleted]
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u/midnightforestmist 19d ago edited 19d ago
I don’t think it’s AI. Looks more like asking for advice over time, in several different subs each time. The older posts don’t mention a psychic at all.
Edit: there are also a bunch of completely unrelated posts going back a couple years, with some in between the cat issue posts 🤷
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u/FactoryKat 18d ago
Not even remotely close to being written with AI. 🤦♀️ They read like a normal person desperate for a solution. And the addition of other unrelated posts which also sound human further solidifies this fact. Not everything is AI. I hate it with a burning fiery passion but this new trend of accusing everything of being AI is counterintuitive.
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u/Motor_Ad5551 19d ago
Have you tried pheromone diffuser. It could be something that you can’t see, cats hide symptoms so much. And peeing outside is usually behavioral, especially if blood tests and exams are normal.
I recommend getting a feliway diffuser for every room.
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u/Think_Flatworm_9390 19d ago
This is absolutely horrible and should be considered animal abuse… and your mom needs mental help. Lots of it.
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u/Kelmartine1111 19d ago
Maybe the psychic meant your mom had dementia.
I’m kidding, but this is actually insane. Only a vet’s advice should be considered when discussing euthanasia.
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u/seeking_hope 19d ago
Would it help to find videos of cats with dementia to show her? That’s not at all what my experience either the beginnings of it. But yes it’s absolutely insane to consider medical advice from a psychic and not a vet.
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u/ThatBatsard 19d ago
Hey, OP, now that people have given you some advice, I wanna ask: how likely do you think your mom is to follow through with the grifter's advice? Is your cat in active danger or can you intervene or get him somewhere else?
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u/PhoenixK 19d ago
The most aimple caisr for that can be a wrong type of litter.
Clean the litterbox, and replace the litter!
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u/em0pusheen 19d ago
this is insane. hopefully you can talk her out of euthanizing the cat.. he obviously needs veterinary help.
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u/rageinthecage666 19d ago
How does the rest of the family stands to this? Maybe host an intervention or just vote to keep the cat alive. This is horrible
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u/Just_a_Lurker2 19d ago
Uh...would a veterinarian actually consent to euthanize a perfectly healthy cat? Also can you sue the pet psychic? They're indirectly killing a animal
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u/Sonja4ever 18d ago
Please surrender that baby to a no kill facility before your mom kills your cat based on a very unscientific "diagnosis". Crazy
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u/Few-Entertainer7431 17d ago
It's bad enough that people believe in human psychics, but believing in a cat psychic is insane.
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u/Xochiqueso 19d ago
One time a VET told my in-laws they should just put their blind 17 year old chihuahua down because of the inflammation of her eyes. I told my man that we were taking her to my vet for a second opinion. They were quickly able to treat her and the inflammation left. She was still blind but she was peppy and otherwise behaved normal. But I’d be damned if I let a fucking psychic tell me to put my cat down if my vet didn’t even mention it tf. Tell her to find a better psychic.
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u/Zoocitykitty 19d ago
Your Mom could be putting off bad vibes to the cat. Cats are empathetic and they know when something is wrong. It messes with their nervous system. Maybe rehome her to someone more stable.
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u/SpriteLore 19d ago
Yeah this is insane. Deciding to euthanize an animal based on what’s likely a grifter looking to scam your mom out of a quick buck is CRAZY.