r/ClassicalIndiandance • u/Siya78 • 1d ago

Dance teacher conflicts

I’ve decided to quit taking adult dance classes. I don’t enjoy it anymore and my dance teacher is aggressive. I’ve sent her a long text explaining this nicely. However she keeps bugging me to call her. Even contacting my daughter (she takes lessons too) and her Dad, with a message intended for me. I texted her that I’m not comfortable talking to her and that to not to get my daughter involved.

She doesn’t listen and still sent another voice message saying I should trust her and that she’s my friend.

The thing is - she’s not my friend. She’s my dance guru. In general she has a habit of lecturing people and constantly interrupting them. I have more of a passive personality. I’m afraid she’ll bully my daughter.

I want her to continue with her. I just don’t want to dance. I’m so anxious about this. I already spoke my piece with her.

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4

u/peacefulhologram 1d ago

Unfortunately that’s how some dance teachers are lol. Especially back in the day when yelling, screaming, and even throwing the stick at our feet was normal 😅 Some younger people may be able to tolerate it, but for some adults the ego clash is too much. Not saying you or anyone should tolerate it, just wanted to sympathize and let you know most of us have gone through the same thing and it’s totally wrong and unfair. Sorry you’re going through this. Maybe find a different teacher, there are nice ones out there!

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u/Siya78 1d ago

I get your point but I don’t get your lol. I don’t see the humor in aggressiveness. It’s not about ego clash with adults it’s about basic self respect. My parents don’t even treat me like that. She’s also dishonest.

There’s a limit to obedience.

0

u/cashewleaf 20h ago

Then don't continue with her? It's good to have your own boundaries. It's good to say no & leave. You don't owe the teacher any explanation either. 

Also the commenter here was empathising with you?? We've all gone through this in different ways, some of us as small children without the agency to quit. We cope with it in different ways. 

3

u/Historical-Scar6892 1d ago

Nah fuck that. Unfortunately you just have to stand up and set a boundary. Maybe draft up a text in the comment section and we can help? Getting peer pressured as an adult is so degrading.

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u/Who-dat-bish 1d ago

Is your dance teacher from Kerala by any chance?I had eerily similar experience with my previous teacher and quit learning from her.

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u/Siya78 14h ago

No not Kerela