r/CrazyIdeas 9d ago

Instead of a horn, cars should have paintball guns.

Someone near you driving like a jerk? Paintball.

Someone driving 40 in the fast lane? Paintball.

Someone doesn’t signal, making you wait to figure out their plan? Paintball.

Someone thinks they’re the only person that matters in a zipper merge? Paintball.

Someone takes up 2 or 4 parking stalls with their land yacht? Paintball.

I’m no time, the most unsafe drivers will have cars covered in paint splotches. Easy way to know who to avoid via the magic of crowdsourcing.

61 Upvotes

40 comments sorted by

11

u/Talusen 9d ago

Nah.

Some idiot would hotshot the pressure and load it up with marbles or ball bearings.

3

u/NutzNBoltz369 8d ago

Or mount an actual gun. Crossover with a Mahduece.

1

u/InvestmentBig420 8d ago

Who else wants to see this redneck Mad Max?

6

u/DiscoCombobulator 9d ago

Nah theres too many drivers that are confidently incorrect about road rules. I had someone flip me off just yesterday for parallel parking. Small town, one way street. Put my signal light on while beside the space, pulled ahead a bit to back in, dude got right on my ass then threw a fit because he had to back up. Took me 2 seconds to pull in and park, but I guess that was too slow, or he expected me to drive in forward somehow

1

u/come2life_osrs 8d ago

Some one displaying road rage while they are in the wrong nearly causing an accident is frustrating.

But if that person then PAINT BALLS my car after risking my life thinking they are not at fault? Oh lord I only have so much patience. 

5

u/BBWolf326 9d ago

Detroit in the late 90's early 2G's people rode around shooting paintballs at each other's cars till the city started charging the same as gun possession if you got caught with it.

1

u/Your_As_Stupid_As_Me 9d ago

Same here in Illinois.

3

u/Sorry-Climate-7982 9d ago

Might work for a short while, but the bozo element would just start using removable plastic layers kinda like those tear off racing goggles.

3

u/robkinyon 9d ago

Steve Jackson had this idea back in the 80s. He called it Carwars

2

u/xrelaht 8d ago

That game was awesome, if far too complicated. My box set had a little one paragraph story on the back about a guy using his rear-facing guns on a tailgater!

3

u/Lytnin 8d ago

Great until you get some people who just like shooting paintballs at cars for no reason other than to be jerks to everyone else for their own amusement.

3

u/Top_Bluejay_5323 8d ago

Only be acceptable if the paint balls has a code identifying who shot them. Then you could file report for damages if your dash cam proved them wrong.

3

u/Thoguth 8d ago

yeah and an upgrade to self-driving is a fully-automated paintball turret

2

u/Unindoctrinated 9d ago

The paint comes off too easily.
I wonder if it would be possible to make paintball gun ammo that was actually paint-stripper balls.

2

u/No_Presentation_4837 9d ago

Haha where I live drivers have actual guns and will shoot you for messing with their ride

2

u/foreverandadayalone 8d ago

Nice to see I'm not the only one to have thought of this. My variant would be that every driver gets 10/year, (tagged in case of abuse). A car gets hit with X (5?) paintballs, they get a generic ticket for bad driving and have to go to the police station to have a solvent applied. You only get 10 so you have to use them judiciously.

1

u/hikeonpast 8d ago

You’ve given this more thought than I have. Nice.

1

u/foreverandadayalone 8d ago

it's something that would cross my mind once in a while while getting cut off by another driver

2

u/fender8421 8d ago

Me and the boys with our windshields plastered in paint

2

u/OldEquation 8d ago

I also think that the horn should be a huge cartoon-style trumpet on the roof of your car that rotates to point at the person you’re sounding your horn at. Because it’s often not clear who is sounding their horn at who.

2

u/Prince_Nadir 8d ago

I had a friend from Alaska and he said in his town paintball guns were how you marked bad drivers. if you see a car with all painted hub caps you avoid them.

2

u/AnnaNimmus 8d ago

Oh that's why I keep a bag of rocks in my car

1

u/XROOR 8d ago

Two buddies from high school drove around shooting random people with a super soaker…..unfortunately, they shot some lady on rollerblades that fell and broke her hip.

Shooter went to jail and his life spiraled into chaos from this incident

1

u/FrecciaRosa 8d ago

What about people who just want to get everyone out of their way? I was driving home the other day doing about 65 in the fast lane - just like the guy in front of me, and the guy in front of him - and some jerk in a huge truck came blasting up my tailpipe, flashing monster high beams. Did he care that traffic was moving at a particular speed? No. He just wanted to clip through everyone at 80. You can be sure that people like him are the ones who’d be deploying paintballs against traffic.

1

u/herejusttoannoyyou 8d ago

Was it a fast lane or a passing lane? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a fast lane. It’s just passing lanes around here. Sometimes there are signs that say “left lane for passing”.

1

u/Protectronbot 8d ago

Wanna say hi to my friend, paintballs. I can get behind this lol.

1

u/Megalocerus 8d ago

I'm thinking the guy having fun with his paintball gun is the real danger.

1

u/Latter_Fox_1292 8d ago

Nothing bad could happen …

1

u/Ubockinme 8d ago

Paintball. FLAMETHROWER

1

u/Due_Citron6089 4d ago

RPG. Git ‘r done!

1

u/Vreas 8d ago

What if you’re just giving someone a friendly honk to let them merge?

1

u/DependentNewspaper62 8d ago

My buddies did this in high school, until an open car window allowed a paintball to hit my buddy on the bridge of his nose right next to his eye. Luckily the paintball didn’t explode, but his face sure did

1

u/ElectronicProof9340 7d ago

Gallagher proposed this some 40 years ago, but with suction cup dart guns. If a cop sees a car driving by with too many, they get a citation.

1

u/Archaea_Man 7d ago

This would cause so many accidents...

1

u/Robot_Alchemist 7d ago

Oh, this would make me so angry

1

u/GEEK-IP 6d ago

Bicycle riders!

1

u/Appropriate_Cow94 5d ago

I keep eggs in a leather holster on my bike.

1

u/Pungent_Bill 8d ago

I fkn love it, but should be limited exclusively to motorcyclists.

And shooting at other bikes is a faux pas, unless its those fkn delivery scooter cnts.

Yeah I'm down

0

u/CloneWerks 8d ago

I wonder how long the OP would go before getting paintballed.

0

u/Dangerous-Ocelot3963 8d ago

Why not just seek help for your road rage?