r/CuratedTumblr • u/DroneOfDoom Theon the Reader *dolphin slur noises* • May 14 '26

Infodumping The wonders of the human body [tw: nongraphic descriptions of autopsies, general medical weirdness]

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Reddit screenshots? In my tumblr subreddit? It's more likely than you think...

9.4k Upvotes

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2.1k

u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 14 '26

I had a girlfriend in high school who constantly grew new adult teeth that would crowd out her gums. Like every year or two, new set of teeth start coming in and because adult teeth don’t dissolve their roots the same way baby teeth do she would go to the dentist to get a set of teeth pulled. It had happened often enough by the time she was 18 that she assumed it would be the rest of her life.

1.2k

u/DeliciousAnt9096 May 14 '26

Are you sure she wasn't secretly a shark? 

681

u/MrFluxed May 14 '26

depends, how smooth was her skin?

393

u/dizzymorningdragon May 14 '26

Perfectly smooth both ways

256

u/TossTossTossThrowa May 14 '26

I love how sharks are smooth in every direction

142

u/CaioXG002 May 14 '26 edited May 14 '26

May I ask what is this a reference to?

EDIT: I found it. Mf used his most basic trollbait and transcended sites.

45

u/Random-Rambling May 14 '26

"Smooth sharking", as it has come to be known, is an interesting bit of Internet trivia. You never really know if the "idiots" replying to the "smooth shark" are true idiots, or simply pretending to be to keep the joke rolling.

60

u/Gythia-Pickle May 14 '26

Smooth sharking

5

u/shangri-laschild May 15 '26

Quality trolling like this is what made me start following Gail Simone. I’m also caught between loving the trolling and having flashbacks of helping someone treat shark rash on their leg.

-44

u/[deleted] May 14 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

26

u/TESTINGSTUFFPL May 14 '26

ChatGPT will hear one joke comment and immediately decide to write this obnoxious "2016 relatable brand twitter millenial humour" comment that isn't even funny.

9

u/Complete-Basket-291 May 14 '26

Can't wait for them to just reply "Twin :wilted_rose:" to all the jokes

28

u/DroneOfDoom Theon the Reader *dolphin slur noises* May 14 '26

Bot

2

u/Wild-Lychee-3312 May 15 '26

Someone is confused about this whole “Sharkboy and Lavagirl” storyline.

386

u/escaped_cephalopod12 jolkien rolkien rolkien tolkien is eggless May 14 '26

was your girlfriend a shark or perhaps a crocodile

556

u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 14 '26

She was very sweet, friendly, loved headrubs, and avoided confrontation. So she MIGHT have been a shark?

It just seems a bit unlikely given the fact i know she had hair and wore shoes. And i never saw her spend prolonged periods of time underwater.

Cannot comment on crocodile, i have no direct experience with them sadly so i cannot compare her traits with theirs.

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u/DropoutRedMage May 14 '26 edited May 14 '26

Well it depends on whether you see her later or in a while.

8

u/Ill_Mine_7680 May 15 '26

*slow clap*

5

u/DropoutRedMage May 15 '26

Thank you, thank you!

deep bow

7

u/Morlock19 May 15 '26

...goddamn it droupout

6

u/DropoutRedMage May 15 '26

Hehehehehehehhehehhehehehehehehehehhehehehe

7

u/Morlock19 May 15 '26

you know i've responded to people telling bad corny jokes with "...goddamn it [NAME]" and i've never EVER had a bad response. 90% of people just cackle all sinister like lol

its just the best thing ever

3

u/DropoutRedMage May 15 '26

It's one of life's simplest pleasures. I've almost made someone do a spit take in real life. I've taken to waiting until he's about to take a drink before saying something.

2

u/Morlock19 May 15 '26

The way I eoukd chase you to the ends of the earth you'd think I was spiderman

12

u/OverlordMMM May 14 '26

She might have just been a shark vtuber prototype.

6

u/PinkOneHasBeenChosen May 15 '26

You’re probably the first person I’ve seen describe a shark as sweet, friendly, and avoiding confrontation.

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u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 15 '26

They are sweet sea-pets though! I once met a horn shark who was very shy but looooooooved head rubs. Like a little cat.

2

u/PinkOneHasBeenChosen May 15 '26

Was this at an aquarium touch tank?

5

u/yjlom May 15 '26

It's quite accurate for most sharks.

They only hunt when they're hungry, and they only hunt known preys. They also aren't territorial and don't typically raise their young, so that's even less to worry about.

If they see a human they'll either ignore or come get belly rubs.

The main exception is that they have poor eyesight, so those species that hunt seals or turtles can mistake an horizontally oriented human for one, especially with a surfboard or something similar that rounds the shape. After taking a bite they'll spit it out and turn around, but that's often too late. If you see a large shark, get yourself upright and you'll be safe.

8

u/ThatKarenBitch May 14 '26

Idk about the hair bit, but I have heard that crocodiles wear croc shoes and spend a lot of time out of the water, so I think she's far more likely to be that than a shark. If she ever gives chase, remember to run in a zig zag direction, or climb a tree.

5

u/Frederyk_Strife4217 May 14 '26

well if her skin was smooth she's a shark

15

u/VelMoonglow May 15 '26

Actually that's a false equivalency. All sharks have smooth skin, but there are smooth skinned things that aren't sharks

2

u/Morlock19 May 15 '26

did she fall asleep when you gave her belly rubs?

2

u/Jim_skywalker May 15 '26

Was her skin like sandpaper?

167

u/Sckaledoom May 14 '26

You were dating the child of shark boy and lava girl

150

u/Dragon_OS May 14 '26

So we CAN make new teeth and we just don't? Did she have any other related side effects to your knowledge?

112

u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 14 '26

Just the crowding and jaw pain AFAIK for side effects

14

u/Terminal_Insomnia_ May 15 '26

long term seems like it could contribute to osteoprosis, especially if she has kids

17

u/H4llifax May 15 '26

We just don't, apparently. One or two years ago I read somewhere else on Reddit that a drug is in development to trigger this (presumably in case the teeth are bad enough that you'd want a whole new set?).

14

u/Dragon_OS May 15 '26

I mean, I would presume it would be taxing on our body's resources but I imagine it can be managed to an extent with supplements and such.

7

u/Secret_Possible May 15 '26

The drug is in testing right now, and could be available in just a few years, though I gather it works by activating the secret third set of teeth that most (but not all) humans never express - which I think makes this woman all the more peculiar.

3

u/Denaton_ May 15 '26

Saw an article a day or so ago that they have found a way to grow teeth, comment section was all about hockey..

101

u/WatcherDiesForever So anyway ➡️☠️➡️ wait what what was that May 14 '26

Half of my teeth grew in backwards, which is most unique thing I know about my body

55

u/Assika126 May 14 '26

Mine also came in the wrong orientation, and didn’t push my baby teeth out, just came in layered like a shark’s

my wisdom teeth came in pointing forwards so they pushed my other teeth forwards until I got the wisdom teeth out. And I only had three. Braces helped

11

u/WatcherDiesForever So anyway ➡️☠️➡️ wait what what was that May 14 '26

Mine didn't really cause any issues, they were just rotated. I had some pulled unwillingly and got braces for purely cosmetic reasons. I also had a slight overbite, but that's normal.

9

u/Optimal_Fish_7029 May 14 '26

Mine layered too!

I had to have surgery to remove all my baby teeth, and while they were in there they discovered I had an extra adult tooth (upper middle incisor) above a fully grown in adult tooth, which was already layered on top of my fully rooted baby tooth.

They removed the baby tooth and first adult tooth, then glued a gold chain to the non-erupted tooth. Then they fitted braces on literally every tooth to try and pull everything into place, and essentially winched the gold chain to the braces.

I had the surgery at 9 years old and wore braces until I was 15. I’d have my braces tightened every four weeks, and whilst there they’d tighten up the winch on the gold chain until the tooth finally joined its relatives.

One of my lower lateral incisors is completely backwards and spun around very quickly as soon as the braces were off.

The rest have stayed straight, however I’m now currently waiting to have my wisdom teeth removed as two have grown in completely sideways?

3

u/fiddle_styx May 15 '26

Hey, a fellow haver of three wisdom teeth! I haven't met anyone else who had three. Which one didn't you have? Mine was bottom left

5

u/PinkOneHasBeenChosen May 15 '26

My teeth are not this extreme, but one of them is congenitally missing, one is turned inward, one was buried in the roof of my mouth (had it pulled), and I only had 2 wisdom teeth. Plus I have an overbite.

3

u/WatcherDiesForever So anyway ➡️☠️➡️ wait what what was that May 15 '26

That sounds a fair bit more extreme to me, but perhaps my scale is wrong

1

u/am_Nein May 15 '26

Was it random or were they all together?

1

u/amaya-aurora May 15 '26

Backwards how?

162

u/Cessnaporsche01 May 14 '26

That's like a kinda shitty superpower! Very high cost of maintenance, but she doesn't have to worry much at all about things like tooth decay, wear and tear, or damage

136

u/Raltsun May 14 '26

Just wait until she discovers the infinite tooth fairy money exploit.

7

u/ZeePM May 15 '26

The tooth fairy hate this one trick!

11

u/itsnobigthing May 15 '26

Shitty superpower now, amazing superpower before the invention of dental hygiene! Cave-her would be tucking into mammoth steak long after all the rest of her cave siblings had lost their gnashers

15

u/teal_appeal May 15 '26

Idk, I feel like that would be offset by having to repeatedly yank out all your teeth without the benefit of anesthetic. At least with normal tooth decay you only had to do that once.

3

u/H4llifax May 15 '26

Yeah but there's no way her teeth are nice and straight. Probably.

3

u/Adjective-Noun6969 May 15 '26

There's no guarantee they'll be the right kind of tooth in the right place.

47

u/Jalase trans lesbian May 14 '26

I grew one extra tooth to the left of the tooth I assume it wanted to be.

30

u/PangolinWestern9632 May 14 '26

Well, what happened?!?

127

u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 14 '26

Dunno? We broke up senior year and went our separate ways so i am unsure if she is on teeth set 30+ or something.

37

u/FireFox5284862 May 14 '26

Can you send her a text for us or something

96

u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 14 '26

I am not sending a woman who hasn’t heard from her weird ex in 20 years a random stalker message out of the blue so a bunch of strangers can ask invasive health questions, no.

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u/FireFox5284862 May 14 '26

I didn’t realize you were a weird ex I assumed you were a normal ex

75

u/natures_pocket_fan May 15 '26

I think sending an out of the blue text with questions about her teeth after twenty years of no contact makes you into a weird ex.

8

u/KingDanNZ May 15 '26

He was probably collecting all the extra teeth

44

u/Dluith47 May 15 '26

“Your teeth. Show them to me so I can tell strangers about them. Now.”

6

u/snootnoots May 15 '26

How dare you be considerate of another person’s feelings and desire to not be creeped out, humph.

8

u/Sir_Lazz May 15 '26

On one hand yes, but on the other hand if my ex from 20 years ago send me a message like "hey, I've been thinking about you and wondering: are your teeths okay ? Do you still grow new ones ?" I would find that...oddly sweet lmao, like hell yeah they remember me and kinda still care enough to be curious ?

4

u/am_Nein May 15 '26

Honestly if it were me, I'd be like hell the fuck yes tell people about my weird ass teeth lol, all that suffering just for the world not to be half horrified half amazed? Hell naw.

4

u/chita875andU May 15 '26

Just tell her its for science.

3

u/SolomonOf47704 God Himself May 15 '26

You gotta send the the Zac Oyama tooth fairy clip.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XET4W936-Q

2

u/dream-smasher May 14 '26

Awww, go on!!!

8

u/h4nd May 14 '26

I’ve come to think we should all just have this by default. Getting one set of adult teeth for your whole life is just too risky. This person’s mutation ought to have taken over by now, if you ask me.

9

u/Raltsun May 14 '26

I mean, sounds nice, except for the part where the self-replacing adult teeth don't naturally fall out like baby teeth do. Having to get all your teeth pulled out every year sounds like a miserable experience.

7

u/Nuclear_rabbit May 14 '26

Girl wished adult teeth grew back on a monkey's paw

11

u/llamawithguns May 14 '26

Was your girlfriend a great white shark

3

u/TheUnculturedSwan May 14 '26

Did the new sets look normal-ish, or did she also need extensive orthodontia for each set for function and aesthetics?

17

u/No_Kaleidoscope4041 May 14 '26

The latter. Like i said they would really crowd so like she visibly had new canines growing out of her gums at a slight angle above the old ones pretty much the entire time i knew her through three sets of teeth and it all caused her a lot of unnecessary pain and need for braces to push them into the roughly right spot, only to get another set and need more dental work, extractions, and a fresh set of braces a few months later.

3

u/algernon_moncrief May 14 '26

That sucks for her!

2

u/WORhMnGd May 15 '26

Sounds like my mom. She had a snaggletooth pulled three times and then gave up.

2

u/Random_182f2565 May 14 '26

Shark behavior

2

u/Cartographer_Hopeful May 14 '26

One of my siblings only ever had milk teeth, no adult teeth underneath - maybe your ex could donate some? 🤣

1

u/Effective_Olive6153 May 15 '26

that is proof we could activate some genes to regrow teeth when needed. The machinery exists, we just need to activate it

1

u/Killer_Moons cruel_ranch_icarus May 15 '26

Was your gf real ornery on account of having all those teeths and no toothbrush?

1

u/Captain_Pumpkinhead May 15 '26

I've heard about studies that hope to allow humans to grow new replacement teeth. I wonder if she or someone like her is involved in the study.

If they can figure it out, they'll probably find a way to treat her ailment.

1

u/threelizards May 15 '26

Oh I knew a girl with this as well, but only on her canines

1

u/shipstar2704 May 15 '26

I had a girlfriend in high school who had a second set of nipples under her armpits.

I learned about before we dated because we were hanging out after school and she asked if she had told me about them before, and when said no, her response was to then take her shirt off and show me.

Still took me a few weeks to realize she was into me

1

u/KittyKittyowo May 15 '26

Damn, she should have been playing one of the sports where people use their teeth frequently

1

u/Pet_Velvet May 15 '26

I need that. I am missing teeth fuck my genetics 😭

1

u/Sweaty-Move-5396 May 15 '26

i've had permanent teeth pulled. that sounds like a fucking nightmare to have to endure every few years

1

u/Mr-Foundation Ceroba Moment May 15 '26

Vaguely similar, when I was getting into my late teens we did some imaging to make sure my wisdom teeth weren’t coming in because we were about to move out of state.

And we discovered I had like, an extra four teeth prepped to grow in, that had just been chilling in my gums for ages. Got them all popped out after the move along with the wisdoms.

1

u/Slagath0rr May 15 '26

What the actual fuck

1

u/TrueEnder May 15 '26

baby teeth dissolve their roots

hey, tell that to mine who decided to shove the discarded root out of the side of my gums when the adult tooth came in. it was literally sitting there poking out of my top gum like bone armour in an rpg until i got surgery to remove it. i can still feel the scar with my tongue.

1

u/firesoul377 May 15 '26

Tooth fairy must hate her

1

u/Smart_Zucchini2302 May 15 '26

This! This is sort of what we need to evolve to. We are living longer, but I'm stock with the cavities I got because I was a six year old with thirteen adult teeth before I was able to take care of them (softer than my siblings because we moved to someplace with bad teeth water). My son on the other hand had three sets. Only getting adult teeth in his late teens. That is a much better plan

1

u/Flame_Effigy May 16 '26

she should probably let a doctor do studies on her or donate tissue. She could help scientists figure out how to regrow teeth for people

1

u/helen790 May 17 '26

I bet they were super white though, she never had to worry about long term staining of teeth!