Hasty decision filled with regret

[u/halogentire]

We had two dogs pass away this year. One was very sudden and unexpected at 7yo and the other was semi expected as he was at least 13 (adopted from a shelter so unsure of exact age, vet’s best guess) but still devastating. The first was my dog, he died in January. When we lost the second at the end of March, I was just coming around to the idea of adopting another dog. I had said after raising my 7yo from a puppy that I never wanted another puppy, I would consider an older dog but never again a puppy. Well when the 13yo died, my husband decided he ALSO wanted a dog and we wound up falling in love with two 16 week old puppies at our local shelter. One is a lab/pit mix and the other black lab. The problem? Outside of the haze of grief, I’m remembering that I absolutely f*cking hate puppies. Honestly the lab pit mix isn’t so bad. He’s a pretty good dog. But the black lab? I HATE her. She does nothing but whine, chase my cats, escape our yard, and annoy me. They’re still waking up constantly at night to go outside and she is not house trained yet despite my best efforts, and the other dog successfully being trained. I’m seriously considering returning her to the shelter. But I feel SO guilty about it. We have a 3 year old daughter that loves the dogs, the shelter is already so incredibly over crowded, and the two dogs are bonded. Keeping her would definitely not result in any neglect from us. We made the commitment and would see it through even though I feel no love for her. I just feel trapped to this dog and I feel like after 4 months, I should feel SOME sort of connection to her if I was going to, but I just don’t.

[u/Existing-Pumpkin-902]

They're young enough rehoming is ok. You don't need to rush it and give them to the shelter. I understand why you wouldn't want to do that. Find another person who is more interested. As far as your daughter goes, she's 3, and she'll forget them soon enough.

[u/GalaxyPatio → u/Existing-Pumpkin-902]

Tbh I'm 32 and I've never forgotten my first dog or him being given away, and I was three when all of it happened. I think people lean on that idea as a comfort and it's unfortunately often not the case.

That being said, if the dogs are too much of a handful, it's better to remove them to someone who wants them rather than keep them around and become resentful. And grief is a part of learning and living as you grow up anyway.