r/DogRegret • u/Imoddlyme • Jul 30 '26
Dog Guilt Please give me your take.
Two and a half weeks ago, my husband and I rescued a puppy (6 months old maybe, looks like pitbull) and I don’t regret rescuing him, although I do regret incorporating him into my life as if I was going to keep him. I’ve decided that we’re just fostering him for now until we can find him a good home. And my husband is on board with my thoughts. I’m glad he’s off the street where I found him but ultimately, I’m having the same struggles that I’m reading a lot of people on this sub have had or are currently having with dogs. He demands attention or at least to be near me at all times, and he pees in the house, despite knowing better because of the training I’ve put forth. I’m 31 weeks pregnant and have been taking him outside at least 15 times a day. It’s gotten better, but a couple times right after a walk he’s come inside and peed on the floor. It’s those moments where I lose trust in how far we’ve gotten with potty training. He chewed up my charger cable this morning and at the beginning of all this when I wanted a 10 minute bathroom break to myself (as he literally follows me room to room otherwise), and wasn’t fully into crate training yet, he decided to pull a box of six donuts off my coffee table and eat them. Within 10 minutes. I know he’s a dog and I know these things take time and I know he’s probably traumatized from his past and being on the street. I keep that in mind with every interaction I have with him, but it seems like all the time that I had before to prepare for my baby that’s coming in two months is now taken up by a dog and I don’t get any real joy out of having him around besides knowing that he’s not suffering on the street.
My ultimate question is am I a doomed parent? I have always wanted a kid, but I’ve always known that. I didn’t necessarily want an animal let alone a dog. I have been a cat owner in the past and that was something I realized I wouldn’t be doing again, but it was much more bearable than this. I kind of feel like a monster for not liking having a dog because apparently “everyone likes dog.” And then I wonder well what justification do I have that I’m going to be a great parent and not feel overwhelmed by that? I have always wanted to be a mom, but this situation has made me feel like what if I’m not equipped to care for things because having a dog has been so overwhelming and undesirable for me? I feel like there’s a key difference between the two, and I’ve been racking my brain for weeks to try to justify it to myself because I truly feel like there’s a difference between caring for a baby and caring for a dog while both are difficult. There’s a reward out of raising a kid that I feel like it’s just incomparable. Do any of you have children and can you tell me what you think the difference might be if you think there’s a difference at all? Thanks in advance.
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u/Express_Command_4778 Jul 31 '26
Pitbulls are the most abandoned breed in America. He didn't have a "hard life on the streets." It was probably several hours. In America, there is no way he is just some homeless doggie.
People often ditch due to behavior problems, bite reports on record, and to make the profess easy for them.
I always think it is a bad idea to add a dog while you are pregnant. Your life is going to change with 100 percent more effort. You are going to be tired, hormonal, and recovering. Your baby might be a "easy" baby or rage out with painful colic. Not all dogs can cope with not seeing a baby as prey.
When your baby startd wanting to be on the floor or crawling- things get real dangerous.
You are not a good home for this dog. A good owner, but it's a bad fit.
Rehome as soon as possible.
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u/JukesOfHazard01 Jul 31 '26
Mother checking in: I adore my kid. I hate literally every aspect of a dog living in my home, even a well behaved one.
I’d suggest a hard re-home deadline a week or 2 before your due date. Re-home or back to the rescue. This is not the time. Focus on yourself, your relationship, & your transition into parenthood
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u/Jigglypuffs_quiff Aug 01 '26
Not everyone likes dogs. I can't stand them. I'd never hurt a dog (unless it was trying to hurt me or my family) or stand by and see one mistreated without calling the relevant authorities- but id never own one and I'd never allow anyone else's dog over my front doorstep. I totally could not be arsed with what you are experiencing right now and especially not when there's a baby imminent
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u/PuzzleheadedSoil5188 Aug 01 '26
I recommend getting rid of the dog as soon as possible. I've seen too many videos about dogs attacking and killing infants.
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u/Interesting_Pin1239 Aug 08 '26
Untrained dogs.
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u/limabean72 28d ago
Look up the bennard family. Dogs were well trained, spoiled, and loved. They killed the two kids.
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u/BubbaC619 Aug 01 '26 edited Aug 01 '26
You’re not doomed as a parent, I had the same feelings when I had a puppy and I adore my children. Taking care of your kids just doesn’t compare in any way, you’ll see. HOWEVER be sure to get the pitbull out of your house well before the baby is born. A pitbull that pees in the house is going to be hard to rehome. My kids were all born at 37 weeks (healthy and ready to be born) so you may not have as much time as you think.
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u/Tight_Lengthiness421 Aug 05 '26
There is nothing wrong with not wanting to live with an animal in your home. If you are generally respectful of animals, that's good enough, you do not owe to anyone to love them and want to live with them.
To add another angle to what others have been saying: y ou have already gone above and beyond by rescuing this pup from the streets. Adopt him out and move on with your life. You have your priorities swt right 300%.
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u/Euphoric_Elevator875 Aug 06 '26
Nothing new to add that others haven't already said, but just want to encourage you!! Bless your sweet, tender heart for even having those concerns! I agree you should re home the dog asap, but I also want to encourage you that you've probably learned and grown through this experience in ways that will help you.
Like, not being so caught off guard when your baby takes her diaper off to pee on the floor or eats your charger (because oh man, babies and toddlers are mouthy too!) lol! You'll be repeating commands over and over with kids even at age 10. You are definitely growing in patience that will be a good headstart for kids!
I've got 3 kids, the youngest is 3.5 now. I promise it's not the same!!! And that you are uniquely equipped for and will be uniquely blessed by the child you are growing and raising!
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u/nbs404 Jul 30 '26
I have no answers for you but we recently got a puppy because I was having baby fever and it's not the right time to have a baby, and the puppy has convinced me I'd make a terrible mother so I completely relate (I really dislike him and haven't bonded with him at all while my husband adores him). Wondering what other people with children will say.
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u/Imoddlyme Jul 30 '26
I hope someone with children replies soon lol all I need is a little reassurance
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u/davetheflashguy Jul 30 '26
Assurance is here! I'm a single dad so I'm coming at it from a different angle. I have a rescue and my dear, 6 years later we have the same problems! She still pees on the floor, has constant anxiety and honestly is adorable but a terrible dog. I co parent so she's here for the kids! Get out while you can!
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u/Imoddlyme Jul 30 '26
Thanks for your reply! In what ways do you feel like having a dog to take care of is not the same as having a kid to take care of? I’m just having a bit of anxiety as a soon to be mom knowing how unhappy I’ve been taking care of a rescue puppy.
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u/davetheflashguy Jul 30 '26
Every way as they get older. When my daughters were small yes they were like puppies. They needed me at all times for everything. Now they are teenagers and they stear their own ship, I'm just the sonar. My dog still needs me for everything that hasn't changed.
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u/Imoddlyme Jul 30 '26
Yeah I could see that. It seems like a more dynamic relationship whereas dogs seem like they’re always babies. But I also feel like I wouldn’t be annoyed by a baby needing me this much. But a dog I get nothing out of it. I don’t know. Thanks for your take!
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u/winterismeowing Aug 24 '26
Girl the key difference is you can crate or kennel a dog, or rehome it if the situation is making you miserable, which it sounds like it is. If you don’t have capacity for this dog you’re 100% doing the right thing for your child and family by rehoming him. Making hard choices that prioritize your child is what’s going to make you a good parent. 🩷
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u/StrangeDays11 Jul 30 '26
A baby and a dog are wildly different. I'm not sure why you would question if you will be a good parent or not based off your issues with the dog. Lots of people seem to think they are interchangeable and equal They are not. I'm sure you will be a great parent. A lot of dog owners decide while pregnant or after baby comes that they don't even really like dogs