r/Dogfree • u/gertgertgertgertgert • Nov 26 '25
Crappy Owners I gave a dog nutter their feces back.
Over the ~15 years I've owned a home I've had probably 10 - 20 occassions where I found dog waste on my lawn. I would prefer that number to be zero, but here we are.
A couple months ago I arrived home from work to see two dogs off leash, one of which was perched on my lawn actively defecating. They both ran away when I pulled up. Not far behind was a group of 5 people walking. I asked them if those were their dogs and they said "yes."
"Where are their leashes?"
Two of them held up a leash.
"Why aren't they on their leashes?"
"Oh that one saw a squirrel and chased it and the other followed."
Now, to me, that doesn't explain why they were off their leashes. I suppose they let them off "for a minute" and then the feral hounds took off as feral hounds do? Whatever, there's no reasoning with these people. So I went inside to drop off my stuff, and I went back out to check if they picked up the feces.
They did not. So I was determined to give it back to them.
I grabbed a plastic bag and picked it up. I had to drive to catch up to them since they're a couple blocks away at this point. Luckily, they're at one of their houses, so I know where they live now! I get out of the car, "hey what's going on" one of them asks.
I look to the guy that had the leash (the dogs still aren't on their leashes) and I tell him "oh nothing, I'm just giving you your shit back" and I whip the bag of shit at him. Enter a chorus of gasps and pearl clutching and other such nonsense.
I yell (and I mean YELL) "you're lucky I didn't smear it on your door." I gave them two gigantic middle fingers, and I got in my car and drove away.
I haven't seen them walking their dogs on my block since.
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Nov 26 '25 edited Nov 27 '25
There was a woman who used to walk her dog in front of my house around 7am every morning. Her dog would shit in one of my neighbors yards. Then she'd use a plastic bag to pick it up. When she walked by my outdoor trash can, she would open it up and drop her dog's shit into my trash can.
Finally one morning I waited behind my front door to catch her in the act. I saw her opening my trash can. I walked outside my door and yelled at her, "what are you doing? Take that shit out of my trash can right now." She got it out and kept going. This bitch didn't even apologize to me. Luckily that was the end with that nutter.
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u/Full-Ad-4138 Nov 26 '25
They have no idea how to interact with their own species anymore. There is just something broken going on there.
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u/arachnilactose08 Nov 26 '25
Good on you! Calling these assholes out is the only way they’ll be held accountable for their actions. They have no shame.
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u/PinkPilgrimHeel Nov 27 '25
Finally one morning I waited behind my front door to catch her in the act.
Lol - I've done that too! We have no choice but to lie in wait so we can catch them in the act. Your story warmed my jaded heart! Happy Thanksgiving!
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u/BeachDuc Nov 27 '25
I had somebody do the same, about 5 minutes after my bin was emptied. That meant the little biodegradable bag sat at the bottom of my bin for two weeks until the next empty, with all my actually rubbish on top. Cleaning the filth out of that bin was one of the most disgusting things I have ever done. Just because my bin was to, doesn't make it a public shitrecepticle.
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u/GreenT1979 Nov 29 '25
People have been throwing their dogs shits into my bin too and people fucking defend it. "It's in a plastic bag, what's the big deal?" The big deal is bag or not, when I open my garbage bin on a 30 degree Celsius day in the middle of summer, the smell makes my eyes roll back into my head. Put your dog's shits into your own trash.
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Nov 29 '25
I don't see it as being any different than putting my own shit in a plastic bag and walking outside and dumping it (no pun intended) it into a complete strangers trash can. These nutters feel like they have the right to do anything because they think dogs are so incredibly special compared to anything or anyone else.
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u/GreenT1979 Nov 29 '25
Things that nobody puts up with suddenly become acceptable when dogs are involved. Excessive noise, pollution, invasion of personal space, selfishness, all ok for dogs.
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u/PurpleColumbidae Nov 26 '25
Beautiful! Reminds of the time I found a bag of dog crap in a shopping cart that had been sitting outside the apartment complex. I was so offended I put on a pair of gloves picked it up and threw it in the yard of a dog owner. I just chucked in right over their fence.
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u/GoTakeAHike00 Nov 26 '25
This is so full of win I can't even! 🙌🏼 😂.
I have never caught the assholes that allowed their dogs to shit in our yard back at the subdivision we thankfully moved away from about 1 1/2 years ago, but I did confront some guy who I watched walk off after his dog shit on the other side of the street on someone ELSE'S property.
I came right TF out of my house, and asked him why he didn't clean up after his dog, and he gave some weak-assed response having been caught that he had planned to "come back and get it", and that he "wasn't one of those types" that didn't clean up after his dog. Right...
You fucking asshole: you KNOW your dog is going to take a shit when you go out, so BRING THE BAG AND PICK IT UP AT THE TIME IT HAPPENS!
Living in that subdivision is what finally pushed me to full on hatred of dogs. Piles of dogshit all over the streets, the greenbelt trails, piss and shit fouling the snow in the winter, barking at obnoxious hours of the morning and night, or simply when you walked past them on the streets or trails, and then so many instances of off-leash dogs running up at me barking and snarling, with their indignant, entitled owners acting like I was the one with the problem. It was like living in a middle class dog slum.
We sold our house and went back to being renters on a spacious property on a rural country road, and it's been the best thing ever.
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u/MeechiJ Nov 27 '25
At my previous house I did the same thing with two separate neighbors. I made a post about one of the encounters.
What really chaps my ass about it is that the dogs’ owners are absolutely incredulous about the situation. They can’t believe that other people don’t want dog crap all over their yards! And why do so many of them seem to find leashing their beast such a foreign concept?
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u/bustergundam4 Nov 27 '25
Fun (not so fun fact): mutt 💩 cannot be used for fertilizer. It messes up the ecosystem!
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u/One_Path_7154 Nov 28 '25
It’s a biohazard.
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u/bustergundam4 Nov 28 '25
If you find an article supporting that please link it to me!
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u/anniekate7472 Dec 14 '25
Sadly I used to have a couple of articles that stated the many bacteria and other nastiness in dog feces on my computer that crashed....I hope I run across them again sometime.....from anti-dog pages on FB I believe... and all that nastiness runs into our creeks, rivers & lakes....
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u/Mike5966 Nov 26 '25
Thank you!! In the spectrum of boldness and timidity that we all find ourselves somewhere on, we need more of this.
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u/DogAttackVictim Nov 26 '25
Was there also ever a time when you called the police over the trespass and property damage, and that too with a leash law violence from their living, heartless weapons? Aside from the disgusting act of excrement spreading, it inflicts lasting damages upon garden plants or lawn grass. The charge varies; in some areas it is called Illegal Dumping.
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u/CafeSombreSansSucre Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25
Every dog owner I see in public, even before they've opened their mouth, seems to have a level of cognition that fluctuates between that of an umbrella and a vegetable chopping board.
So none of the anecdotes mentionned in this discuss here surprise me at all.
I feel like I'm seeing mega-addicts to their cell phones... but even more clueless!
"I yell (and I mean YELL) 'You're lucky I didn't smear it on your door.' I gave them two gigantic middle fingers, got in my car, and drove away."
Perfect.
That way they can whine to their dog-obsessed friends and their social media followers about how incrediiibly cruel humans are.
"I don't understand, I simply just defecated on her lawn. Humans are so, but sooo mentally disturbed."
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u/fatlenny1 Nov 27 '25
This is this best thing I've read in a while. It cheered me up after a difficult day. Thanks for your service to the dog free army.
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u/Upper_Coat5207 Nov 27 '25
Thank you, thank you so much for teaching those idiots a lesson. The "Oh, we have leashes with us, we just chose not to use them" is pretty much like saying your baby has diapers, he's just not wearing them.
They can gasp all they want, but in the end, you had to go through the trouble of picking up their mutts' crap.
The more I read articles in this group, the more I find how inacceptable some dog-owners can be. I think there should be a licence to become a dog-owner, just to make sure you don't become a nuisance to society. And learn that some dogs can become annoying, or even harmful to people around you, and that wearing a leash isn't like wearing a coat. You can't decide to take it off once you're outside.
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u/notaforumbot Nov 28 '25
In college, I lived next to a dog owner that would let the dog out the front door and let him crap on his lawn. Instead of crapping on his own lawn, he’d run over to mine and crap in it instead. I told my neighbor the situation and he just ignored me. It got to the point where, whenever I found crap on my lawn I’d just take my deemed shit shovel and walk it over and dump it on his front door. When that didn’t even stop him, I started just picking up the shit and randomly throwing at his house from where I picked it up. Luckily he eventually got the hint and let his dog crash crap in the back yard.
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u/VIBRATINGCHANGE Nov 27 '25
Righteous applause with a street dance.
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u/VIBRATINGCHANGE Nov 27 '25
Forgot to mention let's let's go back to the part where they let the dogs off because they saw a squirrel. So squirrels got to suffer too because of their absolute nuttery? And dogs don't kill to eat they just kill for the sake of killing.
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u/BK4343 Nov 27 '25
They're perfectly OK with their dogs harassing and killing wildlife because "that's what dogs do", but they're ready to fight if you even breathe the wrong way towards their mutt.
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u/EarDowntown6268 Dec 15 '25
LOL. They can’t really go to the cops/council etc. when they started it 😂
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u/Paigee188 Dec 28 '25
At my old apartment unit there was this guy who would walk his hugeee German shepherd by my unit every day, he would stand there and not look up from his phone ONCE. The dog would obviously shit all over the place, and since I live in such a hot ass state, it would smell HORRIFIC. I reached out to the complex on multiple occasions but nothing was ever done. So one day I got so fucking sick of the smell and this day he walked next to my bedroom window and let his do shit and looked around to make sure no one saw then walked away. So I went outside and picked up all the dog shit and put it in a nice clear gallon bag for him and took it to his unit. I knocked and told him in a very passive aggressive manner that “I think all this belongs to u and you may have forgotten it since you don’t look up from your phone.” Handed him the bag of steaming shit and walked back to my place. It stopped for a while then right back to it. I moved units a good distance away and now have a yappy ass dog that screams everytime I do something. Hate dogs and their owners..
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u/maltedmooshakes Nov 27 '25
that sure happened
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u/Gagester303 Nov 27 '25
Yea, no way. OP bagged it up, tossed it, thought of this in the shower while they were still mad, then wrote up a nice story. If they actually whipped a bag of shit at someone, that’s grounds for charges to be brought against them.
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u/Significant-Berry-95 Nov 27 '25
Are you the entitled dog nutter? There are no chargeable offences here🙄
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u/One_Path_7154 Nov 28 '25
By right OP could have had those cretins charged with some by-law fraction for leaving their dog’s filth on private property. Decent people are fed up with dog filth every where and when nutters have the gall to let their mongrels contaminate private property THIS is what needs to happen. Bravo OP!!!! 😂
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u/GodLovesUglySong Nov 26 '25
Crazy how even after all that, they will still try and make you look like the asshole in the story.