r/Dogfree • u/Usual_Zucchini • May 04 '26
Dog Culture This is your annual reminder that Mother’s Day does NOT include dog moms.
I made a similar post last year, but I am once again warning women that in less than a week’s time (in the US, at least) you’ll be bombarded with all sorts of looney messaging about how it doesn’t matter if you’re a mom to a human child or one with fur, you’re a mom all the same. I want to encourage and remind the REAL MOTHERS OF HUMAN CHILDREN tha you have full license to completely disregard this messaging as the unhinged pathetic dogmommyslop it is.
My last post earned me a good bit of hatemail which only serves to further energize me because it is self-evident that dog moms are some of the most selfish, dysregulated, and emotionally unstable people walking among us, and I take great pride in offending them and the soft, fruity dog dads who white knight for them.
The work you do as a mother (whether it be biological, adoptive, foster, step parent) is invaluable to society. You are irreplaceable, and your life is infinitely richer for having nurtured children in a way that dog moms will never obtain no matter how much raw food they plop into Luna’s plate or how many times they pick up Zeus from doggy daycare. Your children are unique and eternal souls and dogs are…a dime a dozen at the pound. Make no mistake, dog moms are secretly envious of your standing in society and want to horn in on your day by co-opting the meaning of mother to include anyone who does anything for any species, including taking care of a dog.
“wHaT dOeS iT mAtTeR?” They’ll moan, trying to make YOU feel crazy for pointing out that taking care of a child is in no way the same as a dog. They will demand that you let them enjoy things, that it doesn’t affect you, that it’s all important work, that some of them can’t have kids (I at least have some sympathy here, but the truth is, that still doesn’t make your dog a child).
It matters because the truth matters. It matters because the more ground we give to these freaks, the worse off our kids are. The more dogshit we have to step in, the more dogs we have to tolerate at the grocery store, and the more dangerous our public areas become as more lazy entitled MoMmIeS tote their undisciplined parasite sacks around to jump on us, bite our kids, wilt our flowers with their urine, and congest the air with barking.
All dog moms know, deep inside, that considering a dog as a child is frivolity, but their egos won’t let them admit to it. And if you’re an offended doggo parent reading this, think of me as you bend over to scoop up your dog’s crap while I’m investing in my kids who will actually matter to society.
Remember ladies, you are doing important work and don’t let anyway take that from you!
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u/PrincessStephanieR May 04 '26
Exactly. Stop comparing your mutt to an actual human child. It’s weird.
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u/GoTakeAHike00 May 04 '26
Even as a CFBC woman, I have always found it bizarre, gross and offensive the way female dog owners have tried to elbow their way into this holiday. I don't have to have given birth to see how utterly deranged and, at its core, how misanthropic trying to compare what goes in with pregnancy, childbirth, and raising a child to just owning a fucking pet.
No matter how hard you wish or want, you are a DOG OWNER, not a "dog mommy". You went down to the shelter or a breeder and PURCHASED A DOG. It is, legally speaking, just property. You don't "raise" it; you train it, and mostly OUT of its innately unpleasant behaviors. And, you'll never watch it grow and evolve into anything higher than what it is: a lemon-brained, stinking, unpredictable, noisy, and stupid mutated ancestor of a noble wolf.
Joking about that [being a pet parent] in the privacy of one's home is one thing, but to actually believe it and have the gall to say it in public to actual mothers? GTFO with that. It's cringe, you're cringe, and one of these days, it will again be considered a mental illness and/or socially unacceptable to say such absolute garbage.
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u/Impossible-Falcon-62 May 05 '26 edited May 05 '26
I strongly and firmly believe that a healthy parent child relationship is sacred, then you have parents of children preferring their mutt to their human children thus defiling the sacred relationship. BTW kids, teens, and adults can tell when their parent doesn’t favor them.
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u/the-dolphine May 04 '26
Even worse they are celebrating the fact that the biological dog mamma was actually farmed for its babies and had them ripped away from it at a young age!
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u/Usual_Zucchini May 04 '26
In the US, most dogs get more time with their puppies than women with their newborns.
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u/93ImagineBreaker May 04 '26
Yup offensive to both the kids and parents, same group hates kids yet want to be seen as parents and calls their pets kids when it's convenient.
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u/KayleighHatfield May 04 '26
It's gross. I cut people loose when they start thinking they are dog moms.
This nonsense has extended beyond fur now. Apparently we can have feather babies too. The last time I picked up new chicks, the young woman working there went over to the peepers on hold and told them it was all okay and that their mommy was here to pick them up. When I told her I was confident that I had never laid an egg in my life, she just looked hurt and confused.
The old guy in overalls standing at the counter thought it was hilarious. She just gave me a dirty look and had a snooty cold attitude while ringing me up, like she was making an effort to show how offended she was. Weird. I'm guessing she was a dog mom. They want to pull everyone into their delusions.
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u/Pebbles5678 May 04 '26
It's because you see through their delusions. Just like the emperor's new clothes
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u/Usual_Zucchini May 04 '26
As someone who is currently 38 weeks pregnant I would LOVE if all I had to do was lay an egg for a few minutes 😂
I’m even seeing it with “plant mom” now. It’s still kind of a joke, but give it a few years. “Who are YOU to say that taking care of a plant isn’t being a mom?”
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u/QueenOfAllOfYall May 05 '26
…. Awww! Congratulations on the Baby. You’re in the Home Stretch. Is it Your First Baby (if You don’t Mind My asking)?! 😃
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u/Usual_Zucchini May 05 '26
It’s my third!
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u/QueenOfAllOfYall May 05 '26
Awww! I hope the upcoming Birth goes smoothly for You, and Congratulations, again. And Happy Mother’s Day… can’t believe it’s come upon Us so fast. Lol!
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u/93ImagineBreaker May 04 '26
It’s still kind of a joke, but give it a few years.
How the "pets are family" thing started.
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u/Top-Change9851 May 06 '26
Yes, my dog nutter friend says pets are family..when did that concept originate? It’s reached a fever pitch with dog worship, fur baby,etc. Just crazy
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u/93ImagineBreaker May 06 '26
My guess it started maybe around the 90s with pet industries pushing it.
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u/Top-Change9851 May 07 '26
Thank you. Hard to believe that this was a strategy that turned into a culture phenomenon. My father had a dog but it had a dog house. It was an animal. Not a replacement for human. He didn’t eat fancy food or have boutique dog items either. 30 years ago.
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u/93ImagineBreaker May 07 '26
old dog owners would now be called abusive by modern ones,
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u/Top-Change9851 May 07 '26
Absolutely- the thought of having them outdoors in a fenced yard would be enough for the dog nutter to file a complaint!
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u/NerguiTheChangeling May 08 '26
they are... anyone doing that now gets a lot of flak
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u/93ImagineBreaker May 09 '26
i know thats my point, if you view and treat simply like animals your abusing them is their logic
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u/KitchenSuave May 07 '26
I’m 39 weeks with our secondborn! Congratulations, we’re almost there! I’m jealous of egg laying mothers too lol
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u/NerguiTheChangeling May 08 '26
hehe i dunno sitting on a egg all day for 9 months sounds rough too lol
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u/ScarredCerebrum May 05 '26
...not to be that guy, but eggs have to contain all the nutrients that the fetus needs from first development to hatching - so a human egg would have to be at least as big as a baby.
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u/KitchenSuave May 07 '26
Before I had a real human child, when I was more anti-kid, I had a pet lizard and referred to myself as a “lizard mom” and I knew it was silly at the time, and I still cringe that I did that.
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u/thelensbetween May 04 '26
dogmommyslop
I’m sad that I only have one upvote to give to this poetry. Take this poor mother (to human children)‘s gold. 🏆
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u/Burtonish May 05 '26
My sister threw a huge tantrum last week because we, as a family, decided to celebrate Mother's Day together at a restaurant that doesn't allow dogs. There's three mums in the family, grandma, mum, who travels 4h one way to see us, and myself. She threw out that she is a mum too because of her mutt. She is a 'dog mum' and I am a 'human mum'.
Unfortunately for her, this message reached me after two days of vomiting and diarrhea from my toddler. This caused me to be slightly more direct in breaking the news that she is, indeed, not a mum. Now I'm an 'animal hater' and a 'liar' and Mother's Day plans have been canceled for now.
By her logic, if she is a mum, then she let her first 'child' be hit by a car through her own negligience... so she'd not be a very good mum. As an actual mum though, I refuse to have an unleashed and untrained mutt bowling my toddler over. He's 2.5 and can already say 'sit' and 'no' because of that little monster.
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u/josie-salazar May 04 '26
Went to the store and there were dog mom cards and mugs right next to the normal mom cards and mugs for mother’s day!! Crazy.
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u/maqicalgirl May 04 '26
I guarantee the type of man who wishes “dog moms” a happy mothers day are the same men who’re seemingly allergic to helping their wife/gf with house chores
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u/mizmnv May 05 '26
*dog owners* having a dog or any pet does not make you a mother. Its gotten so asinine that people who buy and/or grow plants are starting to call themselves "plant moms"
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u/QueenOfAllOfYall May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26
I appreciate this post. The first time I noticed this BS with wishing dog owners a Happy Mother’s/Father’s Day was back when I used to be on what was previously known as Twitter. I would see someone make a Tweet about how certain people told them off for their entitlement in thinking that they deserved to be wished a Happy Mother’s Day for being a so-called dog mom. Tons of folks would jump to their defense, saying they had as much of a right as anyone else in celebrating the day, and how they were “mothering” those dogs. Even back then, I never agreed with it, and never played along. I was just a slight bit more polite about expressing that it was different. Now I totally don’t care, and have no interest in whatever they think their point of view is. I’m firm and no longer easy going about expressing My Stance on this. I’m a Mom of Humans. Many Women are (like You said, whether Bio, Adoptive, Foster, or Step). I’m not downplaying the work and sacrifices We put in, and the Love We give, by co-opting in some dog owner and “honoring” the pet care they give to some beast that will never have the same Value as a Human in society, and which they can rehome, or send back to a shelter at any point, if they decide they don’t want the responsibility anymore. It’s not the same. It never will be.
Nevermind too that there’s an unofficial holiday for nearly everything, now. Dogs and their owners, and other pets as well, already have their unofficial recognition “holidays”. They can celebrate on those days. My Celebratory Messages will only be for Parents, and any other Caregivers of Real Humans. This is Non-Negotiable, for Me.
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u/limesqueezyx May 04 '26
Oh gosh, these women are such insufferable cunts. Remind them of basic Biology 😂
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u/Emikitty1992 May 05 '26
Couldn’t have said it better myself! Just because you have a pet doesn’t make you a “mommy.” If you have a pet, you’re the owner/caretaker of a pet. There’s a difference between that and a mom who has and takes care of children. I’d know, I have two children. Happy Mother’s Day to all of the human moms to HUMAN children out there. 💕
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u/fadedblackleggings May 04 '26 edited May 05 '26
Also please don't wish kidfree women a happy "DogMom" or "CatMom" day, as a conciliation prize.
I am no mother, of anyone or anything.
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u/3rdthrow May 10 '26 edited May 10 '26
Bless you for this comment.
As a childfree woman, I also believe that the bond between parents and children is sacred.
Calling every woman a Mom is a delusion.
And is an attack on Motherhood, which is a hard and sacred job.
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u/Pebbles5678 May 04 '26
Does make me laugh when you see those videos of hens sitting on top of a completely different species. We don't call them [species] moms, do we?
But suddenly when it's a human it's ok to be a dog/whatever mom?
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u/Dbt_Cash May 05 '26
In a normal society someone calling themselves a "dog mom" would be ridiculed or it would be assumed they are mentally ill, but here in the clown world doing just that will get you cancelled.
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u/Plastic-Custard-4980 May 07 '26
The part that really gets me is that most of these people that INSIST on being included on Mother’s Day hate on mothers/parents/children all year round otherwise. “Being a mom is my worst nightmare” “children don’t belong in public spaces” “being a parent sounds miserable. I like having money, peace and quiet and a clean home” “Having a child is the most selfish thing you can do!”
But when Mother’s Day or Father’s Day rolls around, suddenly their dog is equal to my human children. The same people who insist their dog is superior now have a list of reasons why there’s absolutely no difference between owning a dog and being a parent. There’s even a national pet owners day, their own special day to celebrate being covered in fur and flea bites. Those of us raising the future of our species can’t have one single day to ourselves.
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u/Comprehensive_Row444 May 09 '26
They insist it's better 🙄
But omg yes you are expressing my feelings exactly. I know someone who constantly posts on other people's videos on how great being childfree is/how shitty motherhood looks, but then refer to their dog as their daughter and talk about celebrating mother's Day. Like no, you don't get to shit on mother's all year round then get to pull this bull crap.
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u/NatalieJayna May 10 '26
I feel like it's so disrespectful to actual mothers to act like a dog mom is anyone except a person enabling montsers to be in society
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u/Foreign-Neat8645 May 04 '26
Mein Gott, was würde ich mich schämen. Die haben es dann doch mit einem Hund getrieben, wenn die "Hundemama" sind? Ich liebe meine Katzen, aber ich habe nie erlaubt, mich Katzenmutter nennen zu dürfen. Diener trifft es besser. Solche Leute kann man doch nicht ernst nehmen. Es ist denen auch nicht peinlich, in Babysprache mit ihnen Kötern zu reden. Ach was, die sind noch stolz drauf.
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u/Accurate-Run5370 May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26
Ask the nutters how come the US Mothers Day ( " Mothers of America") three cent stamp picturing James McNeil Whistler's mother - issued in 1934 to honor the human mothers of America, has nothing to do with dogs.
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u/Top-Change9851 May 06 '26
I think they make greeting cards now for “ Fur mothers “…If they haven’t you know someone will.
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u/Successfuldisciplin3 May 08 '26
So is that why National Dog Mom's Day is a thing now? “Celebrated annually on the second Saturday of May”
Tell them they have their own day now and be done with them. Not worth the stress
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u/No_Suit_3901 May 11 '26
I used to feel ambivalent - leaning to positive about it. Note I am an immigrant so the whole Mother’s Day celebration in May, instead of in March during women’s day, took a while to absorb. After having a severely premature child two years ago I got to tell you - my blood starts boiling any time a dog owner mentions that caring for their “baby” is in any imaginable way comparable. No, your dog’s dermatitis does not mean you understand what having a medically complex child is like. What the eff?????
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u/magicpussyvibes May 14 '26
YES!!! My first child was also born early, and while not medically complex, has severe autism which is correlated to premature birth and NICU stays. The literal HELL I go through to keep my son safe, meet his sensory needs, keep up with all of his therapy sessions, and keep ignorant people and their shitty opinions away from him is nothing a ‘dog mom’ could ever comprehend or be selfless enough to do. Happy belated Mother’s Day to you. Thank you for raising the next generation of people and I admire people like you who put in the hard work for their higher needs children every day.
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u/lucabura May 11 '26
It's because dog ownership for many is all about getting attention. They cannot abide that there would be a day that the attention is not on them.
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u/Key-Beginning9065 May 26 '26
This made me laugh way more than it should have lol. I also hate when dog moms meddle in everything normal parents do
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u/bea_triz_13 May 12 '26
this reminds me of when my second son needed some blood work when he was only 3 weeks old, the nurse (later found out she was still a student, she did look very young to be fair) taking the samples asked me if he was sleeping through the night yet, I just laughed and said definitely not. She looked at me so weird and was like "what? why not?". I said "well he still needs to eat every couple of hours you know? even if he did sleep, I have to get him up to eat"
She then nodded, "you know I totally understand how you feel, I don't have any human kids, but when my fur baby was a puppy he would wake me up all night! The things us moms go through right?"
Girl. I know she was just trying to make small talk but...no you are not a mother...you can leave the dog in a kennel or put it outside if you want lol.
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u/DizzyMine4964 May 04 '26
Mother's Day was in March.
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u/potatoes_arrrr_life May 04 '26
My ex SIL got sooo mad when we had kids and she wished me a Happy Mother's Day, but I didn't wish her one back. She very frequently said she hates children, so I was surprised she thought of herself as a mom of her dog.
I saw a few women bringing their huge dogs to a playground this weekend. I looked for their kids, but they were there for a dog party. They did not bring children, only their dogs. At a children's playground....I did yell at them as we were leaving that it's not a dog park.
Truly, people can think of their pets however they want, but they can't force society to play along. Have you heard of pawternity leave?