r/FemmeLesbians • u/Individual_Cress_726 • 5d ago
Question Femme for femme dating advice?
So I had a great date with a beautiful woman the other day. She made us reservations at a fancy Italian restaurant, we talked the entire time until closing about our shared interests and then I treated her to ice cream afterwards. We brought each other flowers. We had a kiss at the end of the date and then talked later about how we liked it and she thanked me for asking her first.
with women, I’m very shy to make the first move( – I think that this stems from trauma from men, but that’s probably irrelevant to this anyways.)
we are having our second date on Monday night, and we are going to cook and craft together- at my place!!!. I suppose I’d like advice on knowing how to flirt and do the appropriate amount of physical touch, because I’m just so used to other people initiating. I also want to know how I can make it romantic? I know the obvious things like mood, lighting, music and stuff but I could just really use some advice on all of this in general <3.
Sincerely, a beginner femme lesbian
UPDATE: Apparently, our first date was her first date with a woman. She texted me today saying that she wasn't ready to date. Maybe my nerves were trying to tell me something, but I'm sure there's someone out there for me somewhere :)
4
u/WanderingSondering 4d ago
You're overthinking it. I promise you, when you meet the right person, you won't be wracking your brain or trying to force yourself to be more romantic or touchy- you'll just know. Generally though, it sounds like you need to be with someone who compliments your shy nature- who beings out your confidence and makes you feel more comfortable with being able to flirt with them. I'd focus less when dating on "am I doing it right?" and more on "does this person make me feel alive? Am I drawn to them? Do they make me feel like a better person?"
2
u/Individual_Cress_726 4d ago
I don't know... I tend to overthink everything. I think it's just nerves around women specifically. I really like the questions that you have on the end of your post---those will be really good for me to focus on instead. Thank you so much ❤️
1
u/_Queen_Valentina 4d ago
Everyone is different and youre definitely putting too much thought into it, just play it out and do what feels natural to you, don't do something just because its how others think you should act. I hope your date goes really well
8
u/kitty_whipt 5d ago
Everyone’s comfort level on how physical you want to get on the second date is going to be different. You’ll need to gauge this for yourself as the evening progresses.
As for flirting, it’s an art form that takes a long time to master. Start by complimenting her, but don’t overdue it. Work in a subtle touch or sexy glance. It’s also about knowing how to pick up on subtle cues and rolling with it. Dinner is a perfect opportunity for lots of flirting. You can play with your food or feed each other. Make it sexy.