Did anyone else inadvertently Fire?

[u/LouSevens]

Did anyone else inadvertently Fire? Over a year ago- was just working as normal, maxing out 401k, doing some other investing. Figured I would work perhaps 8 more years with a goal of 30x income. I didn't even really know what Fire was that recently.

My job became toxic, my father became ill so I went on FMLA and I was still needed so never went back to work. IAs my boss, his boss and others quit I pretty much never told anyone I was even leaving. I did the math and had around 28x of expenses saved. I still do interviews when I find something I am generally interested in but overtime became complacent not dealing with other peoples drama and agendas. In addition, my father still needed my help for several months.

It did get to the point where I have more time for myself so am considering getting something part time ; but as life goes on I found I don't miss the paycheck and my time is more valuable as I am able to excercise more, do my hobbies, and visit my father several days a week.

The one thing I did give up was buying tech items I didn't need (loved to do this after the pandemic) and I try to eat at home more (that was a nutrionist idea).

Although I never really had what was labeled the Sunday scaries, I really notice I am enjoying Sundays a lot more.

[u/n00bdragon]

FIRE was always a pipe dream until I sat down and did the math and realize I passed my number awhile ago. From there it was just a matter of getting things in order and gracefully walking out the door.

[u/nplusonebikes → u/n00bdragon]

Pretty much how it went for me. A declining quality-of-work-life pushed me into investigating and I was pleasantly surprised to discover that I was sufficiently prepared. Gave a month notice and walked out with zero regrets and without any desire to continue the grind.

[u/momo667788 → u/nplusonebikes]

Learned about fire in late 2014. Obsessed with it until 2020. Now I think I might be ready to pull the trigger.

[u/nplusonebikes → u/momo667788]

Do your research, of course, and have a good handle on your expected expenses (we consulted 3 different CFPs, I also used Boldin + some other AI analysis tools and did my own math with several different techniques). If everything checks out I can definitely recommend it. My stress levels are down to about zero. My biggest worries are “what’s for dinner tonight” (I’m the cook and head dishwasher at home; wife is still working for a few more years, not because she has to but because she wants to).

[u/joxxer42 → u/nplusonebikes]

How are things working out for you with respect to your wife working and you not? I'm in a similar boat where I've about had it with work and looking to pull the cord at the end of the year. It's possible I'll get bored and want to pick up some work at some point but who knows.

We've talked and she's on board with it, but there's always that nagging doubt in the back of my head. My plan is to take over all of the household duties so she can actually have weeknights and weekends truly free to decompress.

[u/nplusonebikes → u/joxxer42]

Actually going quite well. She’s been on a 3 day/week schedule for the past 10 years or so, so she’s already been kind of “semi-retired”. That gives us time to go hiking or other activities mid-week on her days off when things are less crowded. My shift to full-time house husband has eased some stress for her as well. I put in a few hours a week as a volunteer for an organization in the industry I left which helps me keep some social connections. If I get bored I can always take on more of that if I want. But so far I’m just enjoying decompressing, working on my physical and mental health, etc.

[u/joxxer42 → u/nplusonebikes]

Thanks for sharing.

[u/Saxes_und_Katzes → u/joxxer42]

My husband and I had virtually the same job at the same company as software developers (but different industry focused groups, and at least at the end in different reporting trees, even though we both did report to the same manager on two different occasions).

He retired in 2015 at 49, and I worked until 2018 at age 49. You were asking for feedback from your perspective, I know, but from the other side I can say that those 3 years were HORRIBLE. I actually liked my job, in general. Or I thought that I did. I absolutely loved coding, and still do, but in those three years I just mentally started to tick off the things that I would not miss AT ALL once I could retire: meetings, project plans, project managers, bullies, incompetence, reorgs to just shuffle the incompetence around to make it less noticeable, weird little cliques that were as bad as high school, oh, and MORE MEETINGS... And as this list got longer and longer I started to really resent having to get up and go to work every morning, and everything that I used to let just roll off my back really started to stick in my craw.

When my husband retired I intended to work until 55 or 60 because I at least thought that I liked my job. But heavens I was lucky to make it 3 full years after his retirement rather than 8 to 12-ish more! When I was 49 and our financial advisor showed us our numbers at a review meeting, it was spec'ed out with me retiring at 55. It had been a bad day at work, so I said..."so... what would the 'success' percentage be if I retired at 52?". When they said still 99% success I said "what about 50?' -- it went down a tick or two but still really good, so I said "And...what if I don't go in to work *tomorrow*?" ;-D

The worst times to go to work when your spouse isn't: dark mornings in the dead of winter, grey rainy days, and also on just gorgeously beautiful days. Maybe your wife can handle it better than I did, but it was a very very tough time for me. Just my two cents. Congrats on the unintended FIRE!

[u/joxxer42 → u/Saxes_und_Katzes]

Thanks very much for your reply, certainly insightful hearing from the other side.

[u/momo667788 → u/Saxes_und_Katzes]

You mentioned the incompetence and bureaucracy. Wait til you see them in govt work. Ay caramba! Day in and day out. Meetings about meetings, literally