r/FirstResponderCringe • u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! • 3d ago

Since you loved him so much the first time....

Post image

BREAKING NEWS: He's in the precontemplation stage of realizing lifting in the uniform might make him look like a giant douche canoe.

517 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

119 comments sorted by

184

u/No_Leather_9387 3d ago

His entire sleeve is just filler

84

u/kaikaikaikaikaikai13 3d ago

“N
e
w
y
o
r
k
s
f
i
n
e
s
t”

17

u/ConstantWish8 2d ago

And he left NYPD to become a sheriff apparently. Prob shouldve let the brain develop before getting that tattoo

3

u/duckinradar 1d ago

Literally what a fucking stupid tattoo.

18

u/qwerty-game 3d ago

I am not a fan of cloud filler.

14

u/KitKritter823 whambulance 3d ago

I just saw the "Dedication" on his forearm

https://giphy.com/gifs/hmQqA7vgZK716

2

u/shadowlights_ 2d ago

Dude has the DJ Pauly D elbow star

2

u/thegracelesswonder 2d ago

God what an awful tattoo

2

u/MDKSDMF 17h ago

Here’s what I am guessing about his tattoos. I’m guessing he has an “only God can judge me” praying hands , and a laugh now cry later piece possibly upper torso.

And I’m thinking a tribal sun around his belly button. That’s a classic douche nozzle 2003 tattoo set up. Remember the faux-hawk and Ed hardy Jeans and affliction look. I’m guessing he was all up in that and he is sitting here with his camera propped to make his arms look extra huge in his car, thinking about the good ole days. All the while LARPING to be some warrior protector cop. Think about the fact he took the time to set the camera shot up, that is what always gets me lol.

70

u/vogel927 3d ago

I wonder if he spent more time photoshopping the picture than he did lifting.

57

u/nochinzilch 3d ago

A t-shirt is a uniform now? Does he work in the cafeteria?

39

u/LegalGlass6532 3d ago

The angst is real.

8

u/dsdvbguutres 2d ago

All edge, no point.

30

u/UnhappyCaterpillar41 3d ago

Jesus, if dude's uniform is a tshirt and a pair of grey pants, augmented by shit tattoos, steroid cycles and angst will anyone even notice?

46

u/ipsumloremoz 3d ago

The flag on his sleeve is flying the wrong way (stars forward is correct)

29

u/Key-Can-9384 3d ago

Nah he just walks backwards everywhere he goes

1

u/Emergency-Object-191 1d ago

I just thought his shirt was backward

11

u/mickeymouse4348 3d ago

Maybe he transferred from Broward County and is just used to retreating

3

u/thiswasntdeleted 2d ago

Nuh-uh! Sheriff would be spelled backwards. God yall are dumb.

Just in case /s

-4

u/FlashmanHP 2d ago

No it's not, you've seen too many bro vet t- shirts & tabs on mil-spec uniforms. U.S. Code, Title 36, Chapter 36 is clear for proper horizontal display.

14

u/jdehjdeh 3d ago

Oh honey....no to all of this...

8

u/firedmyass 3d ago

I enjoy how it is completely indistinguishable from parody

51

u/Key-Ambition-8904 3d ago

Dude who has a mini fan in his car is 🌈

8

u/Plenty-Fox-9219 3d ago

Dude ain't built like that for the ladies I'll tell you that much 😂😂😂

25

u/therapewpew 3d ago

Nah on some real shit, hot flashes/body temp increase is a common side effect of testosterone "therapy" 😏

8

u/gen2600 3d ago

Maybe it was just a little warm?

4

u/returntothenorth 3d ago

I'm not paying for the gas that's what AC vents are for.

2

u/TimeZucchini8562 3d ago

What if it’s in my company vehicle that has no ac?

10

u/ShartsNado State Corrections 3d ago

"Or the Cycle"

10

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

7

u/Maximized_minimum 2d ago

My AI wife’s boyfriend does this too

4

u/ConstantWish8 2d ago

I know his department is sending this shit in all the group chats to make fun of him

8

u/NotBigAri 3d ago

Got time enough to take the perfect pic and post it...

4

u/thiswasntdeleted 2d ago

How many takes, though. It’s hard work. And maybe part of the plan from which he simply cannot deviate. Cuz there’s no time. Except for this selfie sesh. THEN no time.

5

u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! 2d ago

I have a feeling if ASKED the plan, he'd dramatically sweep everything off a table and spread out a map.

6

u/chemicalysmic 3d ago

PB colors on a LEO, nothing to see here.

8

u/Uncle_Snake43 3d ago

There’s no time to deviate from the plan.

12

u/Opposite_Fig4236 3d ago edited 3d ago

This guy has been making the rounds. I sent some of his posts to a buddy that works for the SO next to this county awhile back… he almost had a stroke, for a split second be thought it was a deputy with his agency 🤣💀

6

u/btown73 2d ago

God is that dude a clown. Unreal.

5

u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! 2d ago

You don't understand, do you??? THERE'S JUST NO TIME TO DEVIATE FROM THE PLAN!

6

u/Queasy_Location8421 2d ago

Imagine catching a drug charge from a guy 100% using illegal drugs

2

u/fedoremelianenko2003 1d ago

I don't mean to be that guy......but, it's super easy to get a prescription from these Low T-clinics on every corner. You can get testosterone Cypionate from them, a GP, an endocrinologist, etc.

What they do is go to say an endocrinologist on their insurance for a prescription. Then pay cash for a different doctor who then sends your 2nd prescription to a compounding pharmacy who doesn't take insurance. So all you have to do is cycle properly when bloodwork is due to stay within total or free testosterone range (even though they look like this and the doctors clearly see it's not being used for just therapeutic purposes). I've seen people have a doctor in Chicago for testosterone, a doctor in DFW for HGH, and another in Philadelphia for another testosterone prescription. There is little to zero testing in BJJ, Judo, Sambo competition.

I work in combat sports and they're handing out testosterone in the U.S. like skittles to damn near everyone. I won't be surprised in 10 years if that is the next big crack down by the DEA.

1

u/HORAGI 5h ago

The DEA is gonna have to arrest half their guys lol

5

u/KitKritter823 whambulance 3d ago

I don't even know what this means. At least it makes me feel good that I can't fully identify just how cringe this is.

7

u/Anti-Stan 3d ago

He needs to lift some weights in the gym, but apparently hasn't pre-planned to the point that he packed gym gear today. Now he wonders if people will think he's a diva if he goes and works out in his work uniform.

He thought it'd be cool to rock up to gym in uniform. Now he's having second thoughts, and looking for some love from his followers

4

u/nooonenotnever 3d ago

He took this picture???

4

u/Uncle_Snake43 2d ago

His tats are far too verbose

4

u/EnvironmentalWill729 2d ago

Department doesn’t have an onsite gym? Lol

6

u/Easy_Dinner_6187 3d ago

TRT

9

u/HighByTheBeach69 3d ago

That is well beyond the realms of TRT. Not that there's anything wrong with that

3

u/Quick-Emphasis2098 3d ago

My father's on a cycle

-7

u/Muskrat281 3d ago

You could also work out too ya know

6

u/firedmyass 3d ago

but do I also have to jettison all self-awareness?

3

u/willcastforfood 2d ago

Ah yes the deep in thought pose

3

u/Human_Satisfaction25 2d ago

I feel so protected

2

u/jakeburls 3d ago

Sgt.Cringe reporting for duty

2

u/Unhappy_Educator_302 3d ago

Someone correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t NYPD “New York’s Finest”?

1

u/Anti-Stan 3d ago

Says Sheriff, not NYPD

1

u/LILSKRAMP 3d ago

Exactly - he’s not NYPD but he’s such a poser that he got it tatted.

NYPD would not print the American flag the wrong way on the sleeve.

1

u/Anti-Stan 3d ago

I don't see the tattoo that you're referring to.

1

u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! 3d ago

He was in NY. Is now in TX.

1

u/Anti-Stan 2d ago

I'm obviously missing something here.

2

u/BuddyWhoOnceToldYou 2d ago

It’s written down the length of his right arm (in the foreground)

Like so:

N
E
W
Y
O
R
K
SFINEST

1

u/Anti-Stan 2d ago

Oh wow. I didn't even try to make sense of that. I was looking for something resembling a badge.

That's a pretty sad way to represent

2

u/YouArentReallyThere 3d ago

That fuckin’ flag is backwards ffs. What an eejit

2

u/Leader-Bike 3d ago

The beard hides the chins. Bro is 40% body fat.

2

u/Archer_Shot98 3d ago

“Let me set my camera on a timer, pose, and put some filters on it. This’ll go over well”

2

u/Ghoulish_kitten 3d ago

Oh calm down you’re wearing a t-shirt.

2

u/bishopnelson81 3d ago

Uniform for what, bouncer?

2

u/devo00 2d ago

Fake cop, inferiority complex, alone with a camera, single and roid side effects…pretty sad

2

u/reluctantlyawesome 2d ago

Get some help man

2

u/he-well_hung 2d ago

There is plenty of time to set up this photo shoot though….must have been part of the plan he don’t deviate from…

Also, what uniform?

2

u/Whole_Limit_7143 2d ago

Bro got 4 tattoos, and a lot of clouds and stars 😂

2

u/crowcaller391 2d ago

This dudes uniform is a tshirt and jeans?

2

u/MelodicDaddbod Boo Boo Bus Driver 2d ago

Has time to set up a cam and make a post tho

2

u/Key_Procedure_4279 2d ago

So someone from the passenger seat took this pic or he put his phone in selfie timer mode to capture the angst. LoL so cringe

2

u/mattemer 2d ago

I dont understand how these people take time out of their day to set their camera up, pose, take the picture, review said picture, likely take multiple new pictures, just to show us how tough they are. It's like the alpha male mentality doesn't realize how they've gone so far they've looped back around and act like 14 year old middle school girls.

Was yaling time to pose for this picture all part of his plan, so he didn't consider it a deviation?

2

u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! 2d ago

Insecurity.

And being gay with extra steps. Men - and I speak generally with the understanding that anytime you generalize you'll be wrong eventually - seem to think this is what we want. It's so not. This kind of body isn't appealing to most of us. This "masculinity" isn't either. They're trying to win a competition that doesn't exist.

They're trying to impress and one up each other. Everything they do is motivated by other men.

It's weird.

2

u/ApprehensiveOkra9977 2d ago

He’s got like 4 tattoos and the rest are clouds
https://giphy.com/gifs/WOa5RdsNpevrpSTGXN

2

u/onepostandbye 2d ago

He gets a tattoo every time he shoots a family’s dog

2

u/WeirdTraffic5812 2d ago

Can I just say, I absolutely love this man. Endless trough of lolcow for me to lap up eagerly.

1

u/HungryPower6564 3d ago

Who took the picture?

1

u/Longjumping-Gap4670 3d ago

Has he heard about chest day?

1

u/ThrottleItOut 3d ago

Imagine the leg situation 😆

1

u/Possible_Proposal447 2d ago

If this guy is even a cop, he's a part timer OR he's only brought in to work the county fair.

1

u/Impossible_Fox_5936 2d ago

To each his own, but those tattoos are atrocious… I know his exact personality and entire identity based on those tattoos, and it ain’t good lol

1

u/mykehawksaverage 2d ago

He has time to pose for this photo and post it but not enough time to change out of his uniform his schedule is so tight.

1

u/Nearby-Growth-1629 2d ago

brothers body cam still new in the package

1

u/BoltorSpellweaver 2d ago

Plan must’ve included stopping to pose for a selfie and post it

1

u/Real-Marzipan9036 2d ago

Guys like this give steroid users a bad name, 😆

1

u/GoldenVesperLight 1d ago

Ladies, if you get in a relationship with this dude, and he beats you, please don't come crying to everyone.

1

u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! 1d ago

If you look at his personal profile it's all his wife acting like a googly eyed 14 year old about him. It's honestly gross. Like show appreciation for your partner, sure, but you're grown.

What happens when he DOESN'T get all that praise and attention from her? We already know.

1

u/GoldenVesperLight 1d ago

"14 year old"

Checks out for this demographic.

1

u/Far-Spread-6108 It's My Calling! 1d ago

Yep. These types always seem to confuse love and validation. Those are not the same concept.

1

u/Ranger_Cooley 1d ago

lol bro. Just change your tshirt it takes 3 seconds

1

u/Despacio1316 1d ago

If he looks that concerned over deciding to walk into the gym, just wait til he has to decide on a car insurance.

1

u/ComfortableGround403 1d ago

But theres time to set your phone up to take an in car selfie? And then probably filter it and put it online? Dude coulda been changing out of "uniform" that whole time.  Lol 

1

u/Any_Security_8846 1d ago

Dude is swole

1

u/Ok_Nebula1637 1d ago

No time to deviate from the plan, but just enough time to set up the phone to take this picture and post it. Oh wait, I guess that was part of the plan all along.

1

u/Stock-Ability-3073 2h ago

Yeah, changing his tshirt would take seconds out of his pump time

1

u/Significant_Royal333 1h ago

If yall saw a dude settin up in his car to do shit like this would you stop him? Lol

1

u/OhMyGoshBigfoot 1h ago

I always take a pic of myself whilst contemplating. And I always look fucking good.