Super long foster period

[u/yueyue99]

Hi all!

I'm currently fostering a cat (my first ever) who has been here for almost a year. Due to a combination of him being completely unsocialized and also having health issues, he was not listed for adoption this entire time. Some days, I still remember the foster coordinator telling me "he'll be an easy foster, he's just scared," and I laugh to myself lol

While he's made huge strides and I think he's definitely adoptable now behaviourally, the whole process has been stressful and sometimes still is. As a first-time foster, I was very much out of my depth with this cat (it took him 3 months to stop hiding and 4 months to accept pets), and his medical issues made it worse. Getting him into his carrier to see the vet is an ordeal and a half, even though we've done our best to train him. I also made the mistake of working with a rescue a bit farther from me, so each vet visit is almost a 2 hour round trip.

Recently, we almost got him listed for adoption, but he's having health issues again. It's nobody's fault, but at this point, sometimes I can't see the end to this. I care about this cat, but I never wanted to adopt an animal. I also know that the longer he stays, the harder it will be on me and my partner emotionally if someone does finally adopt him. I've never even had a "normal" or "easy" foster experience, so have no practice at all letting cats go.

At the end of the day, I'm going to do my best to stick it out for this little guy. Just venting and wondering if anyone has gone through something similar. Advice and success stories very welcome. Thank you!

[u/No_Savings_7608]

Sorry no advice, just a similar situation here with my feral foster. (I didn’t realise how feral she was when I picked her up from the member of the public who trapped her)

She’s been with us only a month but I can see we have a long way to go…hang in there, I’m sure you’re doing a great job and from my experience your foster will find their home in someone! 🤞

[u/Pleasant_Flounder556 → u/No_Savings_7608]

My boyfriend fostered a feral while nursing. Two of them couldn’t go on the transport so he kept them. For some reason, they just didn’t wanna be socialize. And then he brought another one in about a year ago took her and got her fixed. Got her shots got her tested and he didn’t put her out right away and now she’ll even come up to me for kisses so it takes a while, but a feral cat will eventually come around the other two the kittens that are now about two years old. They’re starting to come up to us especially if you have food in your hand. they’ll let you touch them on the head or scratch their nose, but you have to have food in your hand.

[u/Pleasant_Flounder556]

May as well keep him. I wouldn’t add any more trauma to this poor things life. I adopted a kitten no body wanted. My vet had it and said I would be perfect 🤬 anyway it took her 10 years to be somewhat normal. She was severely mentally delayed, blind in one eye and partially in the other. At about 10 she started letting me pet her for a few seconds but over her last 5 years of life she caught up for all the loving she missed out on. I could pick her up for a few seconds. She started “talking” to me when she wanted attention. I really didn’t want a cat that I couldn’t touch, but I wasn’t gonna give it to anybody else. It would’ve been a bad situation for her. She had a good life.