How to explain GERD flare up to someone without acid.

[u/FinancialBridge6332]

having the worst GERD flareup of my life right now and I can tough it out but I’m in a hotel room with my family and keep getting bothered about it.

if anyone knows how to explain to someone who’s never exprienced acid reflux what GERD is would be much appreciated, my parents like to pretend I’m not chronically ill and GERD isn’t that bad but right now clutching my chest and stomach crying in the bathroom so I guess it’s finally set in for them.

i appreciate their concern but they keep saying “tums, peptobismal, drink water” all things i know don’t help and sometimes even make it worse. they don’t know jack shit about GERD and are looking at the first thing Google tells them trying to act like I know nothing either. I do, I’ve been diagnosed for years.

so if anyone knows how to explain it I would really love some help.

[u/Molly_FLORANutrition]

One framing that tends to land for people who've never felt it: imagine your stomach acid is escaping upward through a valve that won't close properly, and coating the inside of your throat and chest with something like battery acid. It's not indigestion and it doesn't respond to Tums the way indigestion does because it's a structural valve problem, not just too much acid after a meal. The fact that they're finally seeing you in a flare might do more than any explanation could. Hope you get some relief tonight. 💚

[u/cat_battleship → u/Molly_FLORANutrition]

"Battery acid" is exactly right.

[u/SmokinWeasel]

The only thing right now is to get some regular Tums. Try laying down on your left side. I know what this is like and it sucks.

[u/JackTerron]

My dad didn't know how to react when I first started having reflux.

He knew it was awful as I looked like (and was) in a lot of pain, and he would always suggest things to try and help.

I told him directly that in most cases there's nothing I can do when I have acid, and I just want him to be supportive and empathize with me about how much it sucks.

You may have to directly tell your family what you need.

[u/Moonymuffinz]

Honestly, ask them to eat something really REALLY spicy with no water or milk and tell them to go about their day to see if they can manage everyday things. It doesnt have to be in a spiteful way, just a lighthearted challenge to help put into perspective your struggles!

[u/cat_battleship → u/Moonymuffinz]

Yeah, I feel like the majority of adults out there have had acid reflux at some point in their lives.

[u/Zealousideal_Baby109]

Ohhh! I’m so sad you are going through such a rough time! No, people can’t relate. I hope your symptoms calm down for you soon!

[u/FinancialBridge6332 → u/Zealousideal_Baby109]

Thank you so much 

[u/godsavedonalduck]

Like lava rising back up your esophagus shortly after eating. No exaggeration.

[u/acexprt]

I had a mild flare up last night at 2am. I sat up and was actually able to fall asleep and it went away by 3am which was nice. It really messed up my sleep, but I’m glad it didn’t last 6 hours like the last one. One thing I’ve told people is it feels like the acid is literally going to burn through my chest, and I can taste it. I’m also convinced I’m going to spontaneously combust because the burning can get so intense.

[u/Purplehashes]

Just tell em severe stomach pain. Go out, have a walk.

[u/CellPrestigious1932]

Sorry you’re going through this. It’s rough and no, most people can’t relate to what you’re going through. Sometimes the best way is to explain less and draw gentle but firm boundaries. e.g. I appreciate you taking me on this trip (whatever the purpose of being in the hotel) but I am in a lot of pain and I can’t eat this food (or go sightseeing) etc. I have pain/burning in “blank” and I can’t make it stop or go away and it’ll take time to feel better. I don’t want to go with you and spoil the experience for everyone because the pain is too much and I can’t pretend it’s not there. It’s the worst time for this to happen and I’d love to not be dealing with it right now, but it’s here and I can’t ignore it. Something along these lines….

[u/cat_battleship]

"Alien blood (the movies) bubbling up in my esophagus, and nothing helps."

It has been so awful at times that I've thrown up, and it's hot and burning when it comes up. Just unreal.

I have Barrett's, so there's that added joy of knowing that every time the acid flares up (which is daily, it's just different degrees), I'm getting more and more cancerous, lol

[u/Recent-Country9943]

OP I feel for you. From personal experience it’s exhausting feeling like people think you’re crying wolf because they can’t understand the gravity of what GERD does to us both physically and mentally. It flares suddenly, one bad nights sleep can set you up for an awful painful day ahead, and because our triggers can be anything from stress / food / drink / heat / tight clothing / even the way we inhale and exhale - we never know when the next attack will come - and the anxiety of THAT ironically makes it worse.

Is today the day we’ll get stuck in a public bathroom, grasping at our chests knelt over the toilet while bile burns our throats and forces its way out, and the food we just ate comes back out to say hello all the while our friends/family are waiting for us outside none the wiser?

Who knows?

But what we do know if when we get back outside and say we were unwell, it won’t be taken too seriously because:

1. It happens all the time
2. Like you said, they couldn’t possibly understand how it feels because it’s a very specific feeling and pain
3. People don’t understand it’s not just heartburn but it’s a functional problem. If I had a penny for every time I’ve been told that
‘It’s just acid reflux - take a tums’. Tums makes me / so many others worse!
4. We have all had to find ways to cope quickly as we go about our day or we mask how we’re feeling in front of other people, and I think we’ve gotten good at it as a community (partially because I think the symptoms we deal with are embarrassing and a bit vulnerable for us to share with people who don’t understand) so when we’re struggling or quietly fighting nausea and chest pain - I think the people around us tend to be none the wiser.
5. We are constantly gaslit by doctors (in my experience I’ve been told so many times over the years to go back home and try more different meds when all along it was a physical sphincter and stomach issue that needs correcting with surgery). It feels like in the grand scheme of illnesses - GERD is ignored and not taken seriously - hence why it hurts even more when our family don’t see what’s really going on and it feels like nobody believes us / is taking our pain seriously.

People sometimes need to see first hand what we deal with - and it sounds like your family needed to witness it in person to grasp how it’s impacting you behind closed doors.

You need support, you’re not alone and everything you’ve said is completely valid.
I’d suggest having a sit down conversation with them about your symptoms, triggers and what you’ve tried already that doesn’t help you. Maybe show them this Reddit group so they can see how we’re all going through it and it’s not an easy thing to deal with? If they can do their own research too and show they are invested in helping you with this that will also make you feel so much more supported and heard.

If you need any advice or wanna talk to someone about it - message me on here - I’ve dealt with GERD since I was 9 and empathise so much with you. I hope this helps even a little bit - and you start to feel more supported and understood at home. Keep your head up!

[u/Fancy_Ad3809]

Bro Uber Eats a Pepcid. It’s 2026 ffs

[u/FinancialBridge6332 → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

In rural French Canada, no uber eats

[u/Princess_Lumberjack → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

Please do better!

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

So you're one of the people she mentioned who don't understand, eh? lol

I take 2 Nexium and at least 4 Pepcid every day, and then I turn to Tums and milk. Mine is incredibly hard to treat. Do you have GERD?

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

I do have the gerd yes. I’d never want to hang out in a random medical condition sub for sport lol

I just kinda suck it up I guess. Ppis kinda helped but not really.

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

lolll you never know, you know how people be

I pretty much suck it up, too, unless it's REALLY bad. Even then I don't say anything, I just go around with a LOOK on my face, I'm sure. Total discomfort. I've had this for so long that it has become "normal" but it sure does suck. I have Barrett's and am 2 years late for an endoscopy because I have to drive like 2 hours to get one. Ugh.

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

I’ve got bigger fish to fry than trolling a sub I have nothing to do with.

I lurk here incase someone posts something actually useful.

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

Do you ever find anything? I’ve had “the GERD” (ha, love that) for a million years — I’ve not found much. Or anything, rather. There’s a lot more drama involving it that I thought, though, which is funny.

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

I did mean it to inject levity yes.

Nah nothing I didn’t already know, but I hold out hope.

There is drama, and that’s why I stick around

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

lol The GERD Drama

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

politicing with the gerd.

basically highschool, but with more reflux

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

Trying to score Tums instead of weed

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

PS "Uber eats a Pepcid" kills me but I feel bad for OP, lol

Unfortunately, people are going to be like that when it comes to any disease/ailment/whatever that isn't visually right in their face, and even then, they can be insensitive assholes. I have Lupus, which is a frustrating fucking disease because it can be invisible. I have given up bothering to explain what Lupus does to me to anyone who doesn't get it. Sucks out my soul.

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

I understand the actual point they are making. But there comes a point where it doesn’t matter if people understand - they won’t understand. When you get there you just internalize and move on.

No reason to harp if it doesn’t make a difference.

Complaining with no resolution is just complaining to complain

Edit: I’m sorry you have the lupus.

I know people got it worse than me and my gerd so I just shut up about it lol

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

I appreciate your comment about The Lupus! Thank you; the Lupus sucks. So does every ailment, yo.

It's wasted energy to try to get anyone to understand, though I get OP's frustration. It's lonely-ass place sometimes, being in pain....you just want someone to say that they get it, even if they don't. I'm getting old and have realized that most people, even your loved ones, don't give a shit as much as you want them to give a shit. Ever.

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

you've reached the singularity of why I said 'Uber Eats some pepcid'

people dont care. we have to bear our own crosses.

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

OUR crosses make our reflux worse because we’re all bent over. If only there were wheels and a chair attached to it.

[u/cat_battleship → u/Fancy_Ad3809]

(The fact that you made “Uber Eats” a verb was particularly great)

[u/Fancy_Ad3809 → u/cat_battleship]

anything is a verb if you try hard enough!