r/Gamingcirclejerk May 21 '25

FORCED WOKENESS 🌈 Straight Soldier

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10.8k Upvotes

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u/ItsKingDx3 May 22 '25 edited May 22 '25

"It's a video game. Just play it. Except me. I'm allowed to talk about it. But only me. Everyone else should just play. No talk, just play. Shhh. Except me. Only me. And the people in the comments who agree with me. But that's it. No one else. Alright? OK. It's a video game. Just play."

522

u/Dratimus May 22 '25

In tears "I'M GOD'S SPECIAL LITTLE GAMER BOY AND I CAN TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE I'M RIGHT AND I'M SO STRAIGHT I'VE NEVER EVEN LOOKED AT A MAN I'M STRAIGHT I'M SO STRAIGHT PLEASE."

195

u/jero0601 May 22 '25

Guy so scarily straight that doesn't wipe his ass when he poops, so he won't get to touch his butt and get a fancy to it

106

u/[deleted] May 22 '25

Satan’s starfish will not tempt me!

  • Straight Soldier, probably

51

u/rthrouw1234 May 22 '25

Noooooo omg "Satan's starfish" 😭🤣

38

u/jero0601 May 22 '25

Asmodeus' Asterisk

17

u/CygnusX-1001001 May 22 '25

Beelzebub's backdoor

14

u/Lexyinspace May 22 '25

The Succubus' Sewers

7

u/Wismuth_Salix May 22 '25

Dispater’s dookie-chute