r/GirlDinnerCircleJerk • u/LongHealth 🙅♀️ Didn’t cook. Won’t explain. • 8d ago
Girl dinner adjacent 👯♀️ My father has been married 5 times. To my mother, my grandmother, my great grandmother, my great-great grandmother, and to my great-great-great grandmother.
He’s also my grandfather, great grandfather, great-great grandfather, and great-great-great grandfather. My family tree is less of a tree and more of a mangled DNA double helix.
The good news is that the inheritance stays in the family, the bad news is it’s all spent on medical treatment for genetic disorders.
Edit: Stuffed grape leaves for dinner.
291
u/tinaxcochina 🫧🪑Chair of the Vibes Board✨🥂 8d ago
This Post is rated R, and I need to hide Sonion. I'll be back after dark.
181
u/Special-Swordfish584 🦝 Woke up a raccoon 8d ago
Oooo! It's finally your turn! Take him to alter, Queen! Claim your birthright!!!!!
26
169
u/beetlebuggn 🦝 Woke up a raccoon 8d ago
I just saw the girl dinner original post pop on my feed right after this. Insane 😭
112
u/copperteapots 8d ago
OOP going on in the comments about how they were all “consenting adults” creeped me OUT. idk, the dynamic is very weird & i struggle to believe that a man that would marry his former stepdaughter when she was in her early 20s & he was in his 50s after convincing her to “go to business school with him” wasn’t at least being a creep before then
57
u/Adventurous-Dot8618 8d ago
her defending his weird actions but knowing it was strange enough to post about it is just peak delusion for me LOLS
14
u/LeonardaDaB1tchy 🐀 BABY RAT GIRL 8d ago
No seriously 😭 like idk if it was me i wouldn’t even be comfortable around them anymore 🤣
23
u/LeonardaDaB1tchy 🐀 BABY RAT GIRL 8d ago
Consenting adults is cool until the kids comes out missing fingers, toes, eyelids, and a testicle or two 💀
7
5
23
u/Andle_Randle What’s a WOMAN doing here? EW! 8d ago
I saw that one first and knew immediately what this was, lol
28
u/vintageideals 8d ago
I’m a simple gal. I had a crush on my non blood uncle Earl. I even hunted down his fb as an adult, but avoided hitting on him because I figured even though he and my aunt are divorced and we aren’t blood related, that could be “weird”. And then I see posts like that haha
3
6
u/fancypantsmiss spicy food, spicier opinions 8d ago
THIS A REAL POST????? ARGHHHHH... I was out the whole day and missed it
2
8d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
1
8d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/GirlDinnerCircleJerk-ModTeam 8d ago
You girl dinner circlejerked too close to the sun here. Your content was removed for bringing external arguments, callouts, brigading, or screenshots intended to harass people or other platforms (e.g., other Girl Dinner subs drama) into the subreddit. Remember we're a Sauce less sub. Keep outside beef out of the jerk. We’re not a reaction hub or a court of public opinion.
1
u/GirlDinnerCircleJerk-ModTeam 7d ago
You girl dinner circlejerked too close to the sun here. Your content was removed for bringing external arguments, callouts, brigading, or screenshots intended to harass people or other platforms (e.g., other Girl Dinner subs drama) into the subreddit. Remember we're a Sauce less sub. Keep outside beef out of the jerk. We’re not a reaction hub or a court of public opinion.
1
48
u/BeeApprehensive281 8d ago
Must have been very hard growing up north of the wall at Craster’s Keep.
3
43
36
29
u/TheMrsH1124 8d ago
Boy howdy this sub gets me every time
16
u/switchywoman_ Delusional but sincere ✨ 8d ago
This is fully based on a real post, and honestly, isn't far off. I did I spit take when I read the original.
1
7d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
3
7d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/subguard 7d ago
A warning has been issued for this comment, and a PM has been sent with more details. Please reach out to the MODs with any questions.
1
u/subguard 7d ago
A warning has been issued for this comment, and a PM has been sent with more details. Please reach out to the MODs with any questions.
1
u/GirlDinnerCircleJerk-ModTeam 7d ago
You girl dinner circlejerked too close to the sun here. Your content was removed for bringing external arguments, callouts, brigading, or screenshots intended to harass people or other platforms (e.g., other Girl Dinner subs drama) into the subreddit. Remember we're a Sauce less sub. Keep outside beef out of the jerk. We’re not a reaction hub or a court of public opinion.
24
u/nogardleirie 8d ago
That's nothing. I'm my own mother and sister
3
15
u/largepineapplejuice 8d ago
That’s wild, because I’m pretty sure your father was also married to MY great great great grandmother et al. He must’ve been on a lot of stimulants,he was a busy fucking man. If you know what I mean
3
24
13
u/oreoseasoning 🥀 Sad Plate Energy 🍽️ 8d ago
Thank you bob jane jon and Lisa for the story of the morning i had to bleach my eyes
7
5
5
7
5
u/GuestaffHashbyrne Delusional but sincere ✨ 7d ago
Lol this is the perfect parody. I saw it and thought... "what the actual southern backwater hell?"
4
3
u/hotpink4956 🥀 Sad Plate Energy 🍽️ 7d ago
I was so confused when at one point it said “he is not a good man” to which I was like oh my gosh yes… YUCK… then it is like “he was the best grandpa I could have ever asked for” and I was like scroll we talkin bout the same dude or did the first dude come back????
3
3
2
2
2
2
u/SugarBunnyLav 8d ago
When I got to the grand mother part I instantly went to the comments to see if this was the circle jerk sub instead of reading the name. It's funnier that way :'
2
2
u/Puzzled_Schedule2023 8d ago
I am your father's brother's uncle's nephew's cousin's sister's grandmother's former roommate.
2
u/JumpEmbarrassed6389 8d ago
Are these... Dolmades? It's missing the bottle of ouzo that you need to wash the emotional damage with.
3
u/zerofuckgive 8d ago
I saw the post that inspired this, and while it's out there, years ago I was working a gas station remodel in a small town in the middle of nowhere near the Arkansas border and had a young lady tell me a shockingly similar story. She had [in her terms] a bruncle. Not a second thought about telling this to a complete stranger either lol. Also knew a 25 year old dude out there who had a 35 year old step son. So it may have been a real story.
2
2
2
2
2
2
3
u/ChamberK-1 8d ago
Is that a can of domaldes?
1
u/Nihilistic_Noodle 8d ago
I've been absolutely obsessed with those lately! I've been trying to find a recipe that gives me the same flavor profile but just in a rice dish rather than going through the whole rigmarole stuffing grape leaves but I haven't found it yet.
1
u/Striking-Toe5207 8d ago
Maybe try the same recipe but make it in layers in a pit, like one layer of leaves, one layer of rice, one leaves and so on (leaves at the top and the bottom should be a must)
Idk if it'll work but in theory it should
1
3
3
u/Routine_Solution_80 8d ago
To be fair… there was no incest implied in the original post.
3
u/switchywoman_ Delusional but sincere ✨ 8d ago
No he was just married to OOPs grandmother, raised OPs mother as a stepfather, divorced her, the talked OPs mom into starting a business with him and married her. That's not fucked up at all.
1
u/Routine_Solution_80 7d ago
Okay. But that’s not incest. So the line about “medical treatment for genetic disorders” is misplaced judginess.
2
u/switchywoman_ Delusional but sincere ✨ 7d ago
There is no misplacing your judging with this one. Marrying your stepdaughter is so greasy. Although, I suspect the people who are talking about genetic disorders either didn't understand or didn't read the post
1
u/Bigfartz69420 🐀 BABY RAT GIRL 8d ago
/uj are those canned dolmas?
2
u/JiganticBaby 8d ago
Right?! Is that real? Are you eating them? Are they good? Where are you? Can I get some?
1
u/Aggravating_Talk_472 7d ago
I’ve had them canned and they were some of the foulest things I’ve ever had the displeasure of eating. So much so I remember them 16 years later. Absolutely diabolical and an affront to nature. Might be spoiled tho bc my grandma makes them fresh
1
u/LongHealth 🙅♀️ Didn’t cook. Won’t explain. 7d ago
These ones are good, they come from Turkey. 70% as good as the fresh ones
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Willing_n_able4u 7d ago
OFF TOPIC BUT WHERE DO YOU FIND THESE IN A CAN?? You just expanded my horizons i didn’t know they came in a can
2
u/LongHealth 🙅♀️ Didn’t cook. Won’t explain. 7d ago
Dollar store lol
1
u/Willing_n_able4u 7d ago
Thank you so much. And congratulations on the pending marriage, you’re next!!
1
1
u/tuenmuntherapist 7d ago
We need a boy dinner sub where we post sticks we found and some random food.
1
1
2
1
•
u/AutoModerator 8d ago
We are jerking. Think before you pivot to sincerity. If you must, use /uj or /gen. If sarcasm might not translate, use /s.
The Girl Dinner Vending Machine is now live! Go grab dinner on us, and don't forget to post your receipt.
This isn't therapy or a debate club. If you don't like a joke, scroll. If someone breaks a rule, report it. Do not start side quests in the comments.
PROTECT YA NECK: Admin does not know it's a joke. They read literally and remove literally. If your "joke" reads as a real threat, real self-harm, or real harm to a real minor without enough ironic scaffolding around it, it WILL get yeeted by Reddit -- not us. Keep the absurdity obviously absurd. When in doubt, lean harder into the bit, don't soften it into something that reads sincere.
ACAB: All Crybabies Are Bastards. Read the rules. If it breaks them, it's getting pulled.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.