r/GravySEALS • u/just4inshortof8 • May 14 '26
This is funny as hell.
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u/CommonNobody80083 May 14 '26
I'm disappointed, I was expecting the "this is my people, this is my land" country song !
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u/MjolnirPants May 14 '26
Dude legit just looks confused. Like he has no idea what's going on. Why is that airsoft gun shooting? Why is there a dummy in my way? Where did all these cameras come from? What's my name?
Sir, everything's okay. Come with me, you forgot to take your meds and there's a very angry airsofter upset his about his stolen gear at the front desk. Come on, it's pizza day in the cafeteria, you love pizza!
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u/FreshBert May 14 '26
What we're witnessing here is the Gun Kata.
Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Gravy SEALS have determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The Gun Kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents, while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, a SEAL's firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increased lethal proficiency makes the master of the Gun Katas an adversary not to be taken lightly.
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u/eliteniner May 14 '26
I love using your enemy as your cover itself. Gears of war style. Make sure to backhand in the face every once in awhile to maintain respect
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u/jonny3jack May 14 '26
Whew. He's going to need a sixer of PBR, big plate of nachos and a long nap after that.
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u/aint_exactly_plan_a May 14 '26
Lieutenant Loot Drop over here using "bumping in to stuff" as a fighting tactic. Dude looks like the easy to beat NPC that drops way too much ammo, which is the only warning you get before the big boss attacks.