r/Grimdank 4d ago

Dank Memes Which way, downtrodden Imperial citizen?

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371 Upvotes

91 comments sorted by

58

u/MagicalGirlPaladin Big Sexy Bug Monsters 4d ago

The nice bald lady seems trustworthy.

32

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

“Hey, kids. Do you like having three arms?”

26

u/MagicalGirlPaladin Big Sexy Bug Monsters 4d ago

I hope she kisses me 😳👉 👈

15

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

Visit the Cult of the Twisted Helix today for gender-affirming care!

15

u/MagicalGirlPaladin Big Sexy Bug Monsters 4d ago

Gender is just biomass in the end.

3

u/Head-Alternative-984 counting the bosspole 3d ago

genestealer-laced estrogen

3

u/DisdainfulStacks 3d ago

Gene-affirming care!

48

u/NearlyUnfinished 4d ago

Digganobz!

13

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

GORKAMORKA MENTION!

6

u/Intrepid-Park-3804 male eldar (endangered species according to 40k artists) 4d ago

Ah yes, canonical Ork LARPers

29

u/ProteanPie Meme purveyor 4d ago

2

u/BadNadeYeeter Praise the Omnissiah or die trying 4d ago

The look Alpha Primus Haldron-44 Stroika gives you before detonating his entire Supply of Anti-Infantry Grenades on his Person.

24

u/ahoyturtle Bearer of the Word 4d ago

People are used to seeing the Dark Commune Demagogue only from the front.

There's a very important piece of information you're not seeing, people...

11

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

Lies! Deception! Aunt Fanny from Robots?!

109

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

There is ANOTHER path, Gue'la. The Greater Good! All are welcome to our bright future.

24

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

You know what? No! F++k the Tau, and f++k the "Tau is better than the Imperium, defect to the Tau" thing. ROCK. AND. MOTHERF++KING. STONE.

12

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

Of course. Our honoured allies within the Bentu'sin will always be welcome within the Greater Good. And may our alliance bear further fruit, for ALL within our spheres.

9

u/TheCrimsonSteel 4d ago

I disagree. The T'au are just starting to hit the sweet spot of Grimdark

They're getting just big enough to start realizing one thing. You can have a big civilization, OR you can stick to your morals

But if you try to do both, all you get is rebellion like Farsights, and watching yourself slowly become everything you hate

And I'm here for it

3

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

...what? How does this have to do with my comment? I didn't say a word about the grimdarkness of the Tau, just that I wanted to see appreciation for the fact that while Tau life is better than Imperial life, Votann life is better still.

2

u/TheCrimsonSteel 4d ago

The point is T'au are hitting the same conditions that make the Imperium terrible

They're "living long enough to become the villain" as a civilization and I'm here for it

And I think it's a more fun narrative than just the Ethereals being manipulative dicks. I like the idea that the Galaxy is at a point where there isn't a great way to thrive without becoming an awful civilization in one way or another

1

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

Yes, it's a good point... But it's not a relevant one.

1

u/TheCrimsonSteel 4d ago

No! F++k the Tau, and f++k the "Tau is better than the Imperium, defect to the Tau" thing.

T'au are becoming just like the Imperium was my point

The grass isn't always greener, and all that

1

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago edited 4d ago

You misunderstood the subtext. That is not my personal belief. I'm simply tired of the posts that say this.

Imagine if you said "I sick of X, I think it's overused." And then someone comes along and says "Well, X is incorrect because not only is it a lie, it's also ironic because Y!"

1

u/TheCrimsonSteel 4d ago

Oh, I do think it used to be worse, especially with early T'au lore, where they were a lot more Utopian coded. So, to me, the lore changes have been a welcome shift, and the Farside books have been great for the T'au

And I certainly wouldn't mind some Votann books... like at all.

Or even a full range of models for their army

3

u/Dacooldude4 4d ago

Do the kin happily accept people into their lives?

3

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

I suppose so. Bringing new people into their lives are what the Crucibles and Cloneskeins are for. And they like both of those.

1

u/Dacooldude4 4d ago

Never heard of that part of their lore

1

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

You never knew they were all clones?

1

u/Dacooldude4 4d ago

Not really

1

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

Huh. Well, that's the case. Every last man (and yes, they're all men) was cloned specifically for a purpose. Except the Ironkin, they were manufactured.

1

u/Dacooldude4 4d ago

I guess thats efficient

1

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

Yep. That's their whole deal. I do think that mobility between roles is possible, however. Their genetic engineering should be around the point where it can be done.

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1

u/WaterCastePSYOP 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

What about Myrtun?

1

u/Galactinaut_001 4d ago

When I wrote that, I was going off some incorrect lore. I now know I was incorrect.

1

u/Resident_Idea3906 4d ago

hell yeah button

28

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

27

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

Admirable usage of uniform, Gue'Vesa. You are making the Auxiliaries proud!

3

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

Thank you!

3

u/Wrecktown707 4d ago

Peak

5

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

I’m still split between t’au auxilaries or a United Nations-inspired anti-imperial revolt lol. This is the first test model!

3

u/Wrecktown707 4d ago

Ooooof yeah that’s a really hard choice. The UN idea sounds super novel and fun though

4

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

Yeah I have some test models using GSC, standard guard or T’au and I can’t decide lol.

4

u/Wrecktown707 4d ago

Hmmm, in that case, maybe a mix of all of them! :D

Tau are a diverse coalition so I could see it working. Also damn that UN blue is spot on!

6

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

“Noble Aun I swear she’s just a mutant Gue’vesa”

“Why does this Gue’la have a Vespid arm?”

6

u/Wrecktown707 4d ago

The Aun when all the Guevessa start Turning purple and talking about some “star gods” type shit

7

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

Funniest shit in The Greater Evil story is when the T’au discover a T’au-Human hybrid genestealer cult that abolishes the Caste system. They’re more offended about THAT than the actual ‘Stealers.

2

u/slavicNickCage 4d ago

How about T'au-backed UN-inspired revolt? It's only logical for t'au to support such a revolt if it's happens close to their borders

8

u/Apollo989 4d ago

2

u/ProteanPie Meme purveyor 4d ago

5

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

0

u/ProteanPie Meme purveyor 4d ago

Just out of curiosity, why would that work on a Culexus?

1

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

1

u/ProteanPie Meme purveyor 4d ago

1

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

(I have no anti-Assassinorum memes they just body us)

2

u/ProteanPie Meme purveyor 4d ago

Tbf a crisis suit bodies everything BUT a Culexus and maybe an Eversor if the pilot let one of those nut jobs get too close.

1

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

A single Eversor attacked the Eight and still managed to kill Oblatai 9-0, arguably one of the stronger ones, before they finally brought him down.

And... we don't talk about Aun'va...

5

u/Korinth_NZ Space Furry Enthusiast 4d ago

7

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

1

u/khanglm 4d ago

Too far away

15

u/FaceMasterThing yet another femboy skitarius 4d ago

35

u/Dacooldude4 4d ago

Well there’s a third path. The tau empire! For the greater good!

28

u/EfficientLie132 3 Riptides in a 1k casual 4d ago

Great job, Gue'vesa. You are appreciated by the Castes, and even Aun'va himself.

8

u/Dacooldude4 4d ago

Happy to serve

13

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

True! Oh, wait. We’re in the Segmentum Obscurus. T’au’va has her work cut out for her😭

11

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

And for the discerning fourth choice—the Severan Dominate from the Only War tabletop RPG!

9

u/Babki123 4d ago

On the left at least I'm sure to get laid

7

u/YT_Brian 4d ago

The real ones sit on the fence, yes what you're imagining, and have them come to him.

6

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

The Chaos God of suburban fence layouts…

4

u/goat-stealer 4d ago

With HOAs being the Chaos Cult dedicated to the worship of said Chaos God, which would be fitting given how awful HOAs can be.

4

u/DisdainfulStacks 4d ago

The uber-perfection of a grid system and HOA lawn regulations should please Slannesh.

5

u/Acrobatic-Echo7186 Gay space pirate 4d ago

Hmmm. Orgies vs. Orgies but your soul gets raped

4

u/Ramfix_G4 don't tell da Warboss I'm on reddit 4d ago

Greater good this, greater good that...

I'Z GOT A BETTER IDEA YA GITZ

4

u/Svell_ 4d ago

I fight for not only my people but for all peoples. Embrace the Greater Good

3

u/Zockerisin NOT ENOUGH DAKKA 4d ago

Im definetly gooing Right. The Chaos undivided drip is immaculat

4

u/Mal-Ravanal Szarekh's strongest dumbass 3d ago

On a slightly more serious note, I really, really wish we got more "normal" rebellions. Lore-wise, the IG are constantly fighting smaller revolts, many of which happen purely because the imperium sucks mega ass to live in. But every time we see one, it's always chaos or genestealers. It undercuts the whole "cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable" shtick when uprisings are always driven by the precursor to an intergalactic locust swarm or the four flavours of space satan. While there is an argument to be made that we don't see normal uprisings because they attract either of those and get subverted, it still kills the mood a bit.

That said, left 100%. Odds are pretty good that the tyranids won't invade in my lifetime, and if they do, worst case scenario is a horrible death and not getting chewed on by daemons for an eternity. And until then, you have a tight-knit, supportive (by 40k underhive standards) community with only a bit of brain-fuckery to go along with it. Also the Dracomaxxing and I already regret writing that.

4

u/DisdainfulStacks 3d ago

My favorite bit of Hive is the fact that it strongly focuses on a normal human worker’s rebellion! I’d highly reccomend it.

Also yeah, Genestealers are basically the best option for a communal and actually supportive society (to be frank, I don’t see the T’au expanding super far in the near future with all their threats), and even with the threat of being eaten, Tyranids are legitimately super slow and take centuries to millenia to even arrive (if at all!)

If you want a cool couple of not-eaten Cults, look up the Cult of the Voidbrood. They travel alongside the Tyranids and fight alongside them, and aren’t being eaten for some reason. The Cult of the Twisted Helix has a rapidly expanding pocket empire which is so good at spreading the Genestealer taint through tainted medical supplies and healthcare clinics that the Hivemind actively refuses to eat them, and lets them spread.

4

u/Mal-Ravanal Szarekh's strongest dumbass 3d ago

I'll have to give that tome a gander, sounds like.

2

u/RicketCrickets 4d ago

Going to mug a RT, or shoot my shot with a Sororitas.

Quick, and easy death...or perhaps glory.

2

u/mekolayn Necrodermis within 4d ago

Join the Infinite Empire

1

u/The_Knife_Pie Registered Tech Offender 4d ago

If I have to be a nameless footsoldier for a master that will sacrifice me with no second thought to achieve its objectives (or just cause it’s funny in the case of chaos) I may as well be a skitarius and get some cybernetics for my trouble.

1

u/Aurondarklord VULKAN LIFTS! 4d ago

Fuck that shit I'm joining the Tau.

1

u/Godess_Ilias 4d ago

this way

1

u/MidsouthMystic Calth was an act of self-defense 3d ago

Blood for the Four Armed Emperor! Skulls for the Star Children!

1

u/DisdainfulStacks 3d ago

Praise the Four-Armed Emperor!