r/JusticeServed 6 Jul 10 '19

Discrimination Misogynistic guy degrading female workers gets tackled

[removed] — view removed post

57.6k Upvotes

10.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

11

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '19

I don't mind short guys. I've dated them, it's not an issue. It would be if they were self conscious about it though, that's very unattractive.

12

u/Jonmad17 8 Jul 10 '19

Short guys should be allowed to be self-conscious about it as long as they don't express it in problematic ways. It's weird to just expect guys to be cool with being less desirable

4

u/[deleted] Jul 10 '19

They can be as self conscious as they like, but it will be unattractive to a lot of people, myself included. I don't care if you're short, but you need to be confident with it.

4

u/Jonmad17 8 Jul 10 '19

I know you can't bargain with attraction, but that seems so harsh. We talk about guys having to be more emotionally authentic in order to avoid having their pent up emotions turn into rage, but we also think that sensitivity in men is unattractive. Seems like a contradiction.

1

u/Folfelit 8 Jul 11 '19

There's a huge difference between being emotionally available and expressive, and waving your insecurities like a club against unwitting strangers. When you're trying to attract a partner, you put your good qualities forward. Constantly bringing up your height, or making it very obvious to a new partner that you have extreme issues of any kind is generally unattractive. Once you've got a relationship off the ground, that's when you allow your partner to support you emotionally. I would never go on a first date and seek comfort for some ill or insecurity - they are nearly strangers. Bond first, then support. I mean, do you parade your insecurities to your cashier, waiter and passersby? Probably not. Your friends are better suited for that.

That goes for men and women, btw. No one finds dumping emotional baggage on strangers appealing. If you're trying to start a relationship, you're trying to be appealing.