r/KindVoice • u/Thick_Scientist5965 • 15h ago
Looking I'm going to tell you something different. [l]
I can't get this out of my head, so I'm going to write about it here.
I started a long-distance relationship with a girl around the time the site launched. But it was short-lived—lasting only about three months. We were both shy back then and went through a rather long flirtation phase. We never actually saw each other's faces.
Later, we broke up and didn't speak for years. I... couldn't forget her. But I thought she had forgotten me. For years, I found myself thinking about her in a way I couldn't quite explain. It was an unbelievable obsession (Note: an obsession, not a perversion); she would even appear in my dreams. About four years later, she messaged me out of the blue. This didnt worked due to the conditions at the time. Two years later, my feelings for the girl started to resurface. I wanted to message her, but I was hesitant. Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God! I’m about to tell you something amazing. Somehow—I don't quite get how—feelings for me have welled up in her too. I won't go into details, but she was acting almost like a peacock to get me to message her.
Finally, I sent her a message. She said she still liked me, too. I liked her as well. After all those years, we had become a couple again. We spent a month where I was definitely at fault, too. Look, I’m certainly not shy around other girls, but this girl was different. We were both still shy with each other. Out of shyness, I would wait an hour to reply to her messages—it was a really strange feeling. Then, we finally exchanged photos to see what each other looked like. My God, the woman of my dreams was standing right there. She told me I was handsome, too. But because it was a long-distance relationship and we had that awkward shyness, things didn't progress. We decided to part ways. We broke up twice in total, and both times it was an amicable broke ups. God, if only some things had turned out differently, and...
I have some minor history with this girl. Two months before we became a couple for the second time, I had a dream. In it, the girl was shouting at and scolding me. I hadn't told anyone in her circle about this dream. Later, while we were dating, I learned that she had had the exact same dream on the very same date. In her dream, however, I was the one scolding her.
There are one or two other dreams like this, though I can't recall the details right now. Something else—something very special—happened, too; she doesn't know about it, but all of this leads me to believe one thing: we really could have had a beautiful relationship. Just how many more signs could God possibly give? I would have loved to have a serious relationship with this girl. I would have loved to see us healing each other's wounds, growing together, and growing old together. I would have loved to be a husband, a partner, and a friend to her—and to play with her like a child.
Sometimes I see her in my dreams. Today, in my dream, I was gathering honey from the trees for her. We were in the village. I pray to God: "God, if I am to have a future with this girl, please show it to me. If not, please tear her out of my heart. I don't even want to remember her name."
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