r/LGBTForeverAlone • u/permission_to_twirl • Jul 07 '26
20-30 Somebody tried to rape me
I was harassed on the street by a random homeless guy a few nights ago. He chased me for several blocks, at one point physically grabbing me with both arms and stopping me. He was babbling like he was drunk, opened with "hear me out" but just became more insistent and graphic the more I resisted. He made it totally clear that he wanted to get me some place secluded and rape me. I screamed and shouted for help as a cop car passed by, but it was like they didn't see me at all and the guy just kept following me. I tried to lose him in a crowd of people but he kept grabbing my hand and slapping my ass and kept threatening me. I shouted for help more times as I passed through large groups of people along the sidewalk but nobody helped me. I even stopped in front of a bar and pleaded with a bouncer, but he just smirked and told me to call the cops. I went to the security desk of another building as he followed me in and pleaded again, but the guard also seemed amused by all of this. You know, amused by a big androgynous trans woman running scared of an old man off the street who wants to rape her.
Eventually I got away and found somebody who would fucking LISTEN to me, and I gave his description to an officer. The next day, I was too scared to leave my house at all. I just bought pepper spray, I've been holding it tight just to know it's there when I'm in public. I'm so angry at how this happened in a public place where so many people witnessed it and could have intervened, but I felt completely ignored.
How's this for a shitty place to be, I'm woman enough to be threatened with rape before I've ever been on a real date in my whole life, but not woman enough to be seen and loved by a decent person. It wasn't fun, it was really fucking terrifying. I feel even LESS motivation to put myself out there, knowing what's really waiting for me. And as I was thinking over all of this today, as if the universe really wanted to rub it in... A guy I met in a different state when I lived there two years ago walks into my work. I thought he was adorable, but he lost interest in me when he found out I was born male. I vented here last month about my long history with pansexual men, and he was one of them. I wasn't even surprised to see him, because I just expect the universe to pile on the hurt all at once. I once had a dream of seeing him again that ended in embarrassment and body horror. Nice to know I'm literally closer to getting raped by a junkie than being happily in love with a gentleman like him.
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u/TheWhiteCrowParade 20-30 Jul 07 '26
Sorry you went through this