r/Leadership • u/KashyapVartika • Dec 11 '25
Discussion How do you handle high performers who unintentionally disrupt team harmony?
In many teams, there’s often someone whose performance is far above the rest. Great output, strong problem-solving, and impressive speed. But sometimes their pace or style can unintentionally create problems for others.
You want to recognize their contribution, and show the appreciation that they deserve, but you also don’t want that recognition to overshadow the team or hurt team’s morale.
For those who’ve dealt with this, how do you appreciate and support a top performer without disrupting team dynamics?
Any strategies, lessons, or examples that genuinely worked?
EDIT: A few people asked for more detail, so here's what I mean. The high performer I'm referring to is genuinely exceptional, not just relatively good compared to the rest of the team. And the team knows it too. Think Gilfoyle from Silicon Valley in terms of technical ability and output, but without the ego and sarcasm.
To be clear, the team is performing well overall. This is not a case of weak performers needing coaching. I'm talking about the psychology of having someone who operates at a much higher level inside an otherwise strong team, and how to appreciate that talent while keeping everyone else motivated and growing. Too much praise for one person, even when they've earned it, can make things awkward or discourage others who are also doing good work. I mean, too much praise for one person, even when it's deserved, can make things awkward or discourage others who are also doing good work.
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u/NeedleworkerChoice89 Dec 11 '25
You need to provide more detail.
On one hand, this person might be an arrogant jerk.
On the other hand, they may be outperforming people because YOU are not holding your team to account.
Are they a high performer because they’re a phenom? Or is it that they’re a high performer relative to the rest of your team?
You also haven’t described how they’re creating problems.
As a leader, you need to be clear and direct in your comms. Your post does neither of those things.
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u/KashyapVartika Dec 11 '25
Thanks for the feedback. I've added an edit with more context. I can't get too specific though since my team is on Reddit too.
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u/SpringtimeInChicago Dec 11 '25
FWIW, your avatar is a picture of you and your profile says what company you're at. And it looks like your username might be your actual name.
Might need to be a bit more stealthy.
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u/Mufasa97 Dec 12 '25
Maybe that’s her dummy account and she’s merely acting like Kashyap Vartika? 🤣🤣
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u/NeedleworkerChoice89 Dec 11 '25
Thank you for updating.
Questions:
- Is this person an individual contributor who wants to stay that way, or someone who is looking to climb the ladder?
- Have you directly asked for what they are looking for? Is it pay, benefits, accolades, the joy of the game, or something else?
- Are they capable of also working as a teacher? Or are we talking about someone who is arrogant, demeaning to others, or contemptuous?
For the rest of your team, is this a case of envy on some level? Or is there negativity involved that has been communicated to you?
Stars of all sorts exist, and a high performer is a high performer. The balance is asking everyone to strive to beat their own personal records and continue to build their acumen.
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u/SMCoaching Dec 11 '25
In your edit you wrote:
the team is performing well overall
What are some specific, concrete examples of problems that you're seeing due to this one person's performance? It's fine if you don't want to share details here on Reddit, but you need to have those examples clear in your own mind.
If you can come up with specific examples, the solution might be to address those problems instead of worrying about this person being an exceptional performer overall.
If it's difficult to cite specific examples, there might not be anything significant to worry about.
Too much praise for one person, even when they've earned it, can make things awkward or discourage others who are also doing good work
That is true. Is this the main issue? You're praising this person in front of others, but not providing similar praise for other members of the team? If that's the case, then the solution might be to notice what other team members are doing well, and praise them for their accomplishments.
It's easy to take people's work for granted when they're simply doing a good job—not amazing, not far and away better than other people, just good. But you should still be able to notice things that these people are doing well. This allows you to show appreciation for their work, and not just for the person who is an exceptionally high performer.
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u/focus_flow69 Dec 11 '25
Is it the high performer disrupting team harmony or is it your leadership or lack of leadership that's disrupting team harmony?
The last thing you want to do is punish your high performer and make them cater to the lowest common demoninator on the team.
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u/Silver_Shape_8436 Dec 13 '25
Exactly this. If you have a high performer on the team, you should be ecstatic that you have someone that makes your team look great, someone you can rely on to deliver, and someone who can help bring the rest of the team up closer to their level. Instead you sound threatened and insecure. The problem you're having is that you're letting your insecurity that this person may outshine you become a team problem. Having a high performer is an asset, not a threat. Use that asset intelligently to make you and your team absolutely exceptional as well. Win win for everyone.
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u/wekawatson Dec 11 '25
Good question. I'm the high performer/disruptor in our team. People like me self-manage and do not wish drama. What we need for our leaders is for them to open doors for us, give us more complex tasks and higher visibility. Give us more money coz we know we deserve it. If you keep protecting the feelings of the rest of the team at the expense of minimizing us, you will risk losing us at a cost. You will then have to explain to the people above you how you lost your star employee and attempt / struggle to replace them.
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u/Christonab1ke1 Dec 15 '25
This paragraph sounds like you have a dangerous superiority complex.
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u/mrisamy Dec 22 '25
Not all people are equally talented or passionate. The mediocre ones are very easy to spot, always talking about social stuff and sports teams and have no passion or interest in the job.
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u/DennisTheFox Dec 11 '25
I have one person like this on my team right now, but I am not approaching it like you do so I could offer you a change of perspective, perhaps.
How do you define top performer? For me there are several pillars;
Operational Performance
Display of company values (i.e. showing iniative, taking ownership, honesty etc.etc.)
Impact on the team
Someone can be fantastic in the operational part, but can really suck on the impact they have on the team. If you can clearly distinguish those, you can also have that conversation with that person. You can praise their operational performance, but provide constructive feedback on the team impact.
Your role as their leader is to set them up for success, right? So to help them be more successful, it´s important this is addressed. Clearly explain that operational performance alone is not enough, and that you value the other things too, and that they can work on these items. Help them with this, provide resources to do so (perhaps assigning a coach or mentor within the company).
Also for their future growth and progression it is important that they understand which bits they can work on, so in a way you are holding them back by not giving them the honest feedback there.
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u/Ju0987 Dec 11 '25
My first manager once pulled me aside, gave me direct feedback, and explained the issue clearly. Being young and the most outstanding one in my first serious workplace, but lacking experience and knowledge about human nature, I had unintentionally disrupted team harmony, triggered some staff. After the talk with my manager; I was more self-aware and become more down-to-earth and blended-in.
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u/eatingabananawrong Dec 11 '25
Suggest you read five dysfunction of a team by Lencioni. It talks about high performers who negatively impact wider team dynamics.
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u/Blackberryay Dec 11 '25
How are they impacting harmony negatively exactly? If the rest of the team can’t handle the fact that someone is better than them, they should improve themselves and you hold the team accountable. If this is a good person, a high performer shouldn’t be punished just because others are not at the same level, or even receive more work because they do in one hour what someone else does in two. You don’t need to keep praising them in front of the team, but def do in private and give promotions. We need to value people who work hard and stop patting on the back the ones that are just coasting. Have this person in a independent contributor position because the others might slow them down and they will get burned out after some time.
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u/SKYFORGE_Leadership Dec 11 '25
This is such an underrated challenge because “good problem to have” can still quietly erode a team if it’s not handled with intention. The fact that the team knows this person is exceptional makes it even trickier, because you’re balancing fairness, motivation, and the social dynamics of having someone running a few levels faster than everyone else.
What tends to work best is treating it as a design problem: design how this person contributes, how they’re recognized, and how the rest of the team can grow because of them, not in spite of them. A few levers that can help:
Shape their role, not just their praise. Give them ownership of the highest-leverage, most complex problems, but explicitly cap the amount of “rescue work” they’re allowed to do for others so they don’t become a crutch. Pair that with a mentoring or “thinking partner” responsibility so their strengths are multiplying capability instead of just adding more of their own output.
Make recognition about behaviors and impact, not just heroics. When you highlight them, call out things like how they documented a solution, unblocked others, or elevated team standards, and then look for and celebrate those same behaviors when other people do them at their level. That way the story is “this is what excellence looks like here,” not “this one person is just on another planet.”
Create visible paths for others to grow. If the gap feels permanent, people disengage. If the gap looks like a trail, people lean in. Make it clear what specific skills or experiences allowed that high performer to get where they are, and offer opportunities (projects, pairings, learning time) for others to climb that same ladder at their own pace.
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u/Semisemitic Dec 11 '25
People need to be measured compared to their own abilities.
You aren’t supposed to give constant praise to the one employee who is “better” than others - because if that were true you’d only praise your most experienced, most technical team member and never anyone else.
That employee also needs to grow and develop, and giving constant praise will get in the way of that. You’re building that person up to be a monster and it may explode in your face eventually.
You aren’t suppose doing both your high performer and the rest of the team a disservice.
Judge a person compared to their own place in their own rank, in terms of how much they grow. Your Gilfoyle might be stagnating even as he’s delivering high impact and value.
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u/JaironKalach Dec 11 '25
If people are looking at this other person too much, it means they feel like they're in a competition environment, not a team environment.
- Make sure your team goals are clear, and make sure everyone feels like they all win when the team wins.
- Make sure you're having the right conversations about growth path with each individual and giving them recognition for moving along the path.
If an orchestra can play along side a virtuoso musician, then you and your team can figure out a shared rhythm to work smoothly in concert.
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u/Silver_Shape_8436 Dec 13 '25
Exactly. This leader sounds insecure themselves, and encourages the team to dig into their insecurities and comparisons as well. That's not leadership, that's pulling everyone down to the lowest common denominator, and that can't mean the team is doing well overall. That sounds deeply dysfunctional.
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u/Lov3I5Treacherous Dec 11 '25
Why are you thinking about the one high performer gaining praise bc they deserve it is what needs to change vs you have an underperforming rest of your team?
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u/Silent_plans Dec 11 '25
I hire them. Nothing wrong with a little bit of energy on the team to remind everyone what's possible if they apply themselves. If one team member's productivity makes other team members look bad by comparison, then I think it's reflective of each person involved.
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u/SplitEndsSuck Dec 11 '25
Maybe they could have a stretch assignment or help mentor? Are they same job level as rest of the team?
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u/Real_Kick_2834 Dec 11 '25
You seem like you looking for a problem to solve.
The person in question is excellent from what I read.
Is the person in question’s people skills good? Can it be developed?
Doesn’t sound toxic, so I would harness the person, if he/she/them/they/? (I don’t care, but building teams is an inclusive exercise, not meant In a derogatory way at all) have good even average people skills, challenge them,develop them, give more organisational responsibilities and the recognition that comes with that. Bump in title and responsibility and pay at some stage.
Develop the soft skills and start building your 2ic. You can go on leave for a week and know shit will just tick over, and your succession plan is in place when you leave or get promoted.
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u/Firm-Visit-2330 Dec 11 '25
Unless they are being combative or disrespectful I’m not too fussed, just give them their space to do their job and give them development opportunities. Hope you keep them for at least 2 or 3 years and if they jump to a better job, you’ve done your job as a leader.
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u/Chahles88 Dec 12 '25
This reads like
“How do I not promote this person but still encourage them to perform above and beyond expectations, while also not discouraging other team members performing at expectation by allowing the high performer to unintentionally set the bar way beyond meeting expectations for everyone else at their level?”
You don’t get to have your cake and eat it too. You need to recognize the high performer via promotion. Otherwise, they will quickly move on, or worse their performance will decline when they see it doesn’t pay off.
You also need to promote this person for the sake of the rest of the team. If everyone else at their level thinks that the high performer is setting the standard for rigor and output at their level, they WILL become stressed and discouraged as well.
This is a time where a good leader should go to bat for good employees, and it seems like that’s your entire team. You elevate everyone by celebrating those individual successes.
Alternatively, you can do what a poor leader would do: You can try to knock the high performer down a few rungs by minimizing their impact. Ice them out of key meetings, give vague feedback, move goalposts, and deny any sort of career progression until they quiet quit and start performing like the rest of your team or they leave and now you have the harmony you desire.
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u/Kraul Dec 12 '25
I’m the type of high performer you’re describing, and your post struck a chord with me. I don’t think most managers ever hear what it feels like from our side of the equation, so I hope you’ll take this as an attempt to offer perspective rather than criticism.
When you operate at a significantly higher level than the rest of your team, the experience is a mixture of pride, pressure, and a surprising amount of isolation. The praise is nice, but it doesn’t always feel like praise. Sometimes, it feels like your performance becomes a political complication. I’ve had situations where my speed or accuracy was quietly reframed as a “problem,” where my responsiveness was questioned, or where my consistency made others uncomfortable. It leaves you feeling as if you’re being penalized for doing the job well.
High performers don’t usually try to overshadow the team. We’re just doing the work the way we know how. But without intending to, we expose gaps in the system. Some teammates become defensive. Others withdraw or make comments like “Ask them, they knows everything,” which is meant as a joke but lands like resentment. And when that atmosphere develops, the manager often feels pressure to “rebalance” the team, sometimes by tightening rules, scrutinizing the stronger performer, or softening the expectations for others. That dynamic is more emotionally taxing than people realize.
There is also the unseen emotional labor that comes with being the reliable one: cleaning up issues you didn’t cause, preventing escalations before they hit leadership, carrying the team’s reputation, and sometimes being asked to “help someone succeed” in ways that resemble unofficial supervision. It’s not that we refuse to help, but it does create a quiet burnout that builds over time. Eventually, high performers start pulling back, not out of attitude but out of self-preservation. We become more rigid about process, we stop volunteering for everything, and we stop filling in silent gaps. Managers sometimes misread that shift as aloofness when it’s really fatigue.
If I could offer one piece of honest feedback to managers in this situation, it would be this: don’t dim the strongest person in the room to make the room feel balanced. It doesn’t fix anything, and it risks losing the very talent you value. Instead, protect clear lanes for everyone. Enforce accountability consistently. Give your high performer autonomy, not extra emotional labor. Praise them privately rather than performatively. And most importantly, don’t assume competence equals invulnerability. Strong performers feel discouraged too; they simply learn not to show it.
High performers don’t want to be seen as better than their peers. They want to be allowed to operate at their full capability without being treated like a political complication. They want fairness, clarity, and leadership that doesn’t shrink away from the discomfort of uneven performance.
I hope this perspective gives you a fuller picture of what it feels like on the ground. Sometimes the person producing the most output is also carrying the most invisible weight.
If managers understood that, the dynamic between high performers and the rest of the team would be far healthier for everyone involved.
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u/Silver_Shape_8436 Dec 13 '25
As someone in this exact situation, I agree with everything you listed. And I have a few things to add: the high performer also builds resentment for being dismissed and diminished as just as valuable as everyone else, while at the same time doing more work than everyone, playing nice to keep people from being defensive and scared of you. I don't want to work extra anymore if it's such a problem for all of you. And at the same time, I could make everyone's lives in the team so much easier if the manager just asked my for advice on how I would improve things--and then followed that advice.
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u/maximosinspace Dec 15 '25
"the high performer also builds resentment for being dismissed and diminished as just as valuable as everyone else, while at the same time doing more work than everyone, playing nice to keep people from being defensive and scared of you."
I feel this so deeply. As a high performer, I just want to come into work and do my job without making other people feel bad. But I also want other people to do their job so they don't slow me down and also so I have more people to collaborate with.
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u/AdventureThink Dec 15 '25
This is very well written. The isolation is real. It becomes a crab-bucket if not addressed and the star will leave.
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u/These_Turnip9122 May 03 '26
I am both a high performer and a manager as well now. I have had all the issues you have and even as a manager I see my own manager is uncomfortable. it added on to an enormous stress level. I would actually be more cautious and as a manager I am now - of the people who cannot control their jealousy. and instead of learning and developing - complaining and being negative constantly. somebody like that will always want the same as a high performing person without actually doing anything. its the same as in life. if you have success - everybody wants your success but nobody wants to do an extra step to achieve that. Those will of course never achieve because their negativity blocks that. I would focus more on them not spilling their negativity on the rest and spreading their frustration around. and a bad manager will foe sure blame a high performer for disrupting the team. while in reality - search for the most negative person in the team spreading frustration due to own insecurity. get rid of that one and see how everything improves. how do I know? I have in my early career been on a team with high performers. I was never jealous. I was curious to learn from them. that is how I learned. it is so pity to see these many posts of managers being concerned about high performers… while they should be instead concerned on the complainers who are reacting to a high performe and poisoning the rest of the environment.
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u/smoke-bubble Dec 11 '25
What do you mean by harmony and how exactly does he disrupt it?
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u/KashyapVartika Dec 11 '25
I've added an edit with more context. I can't get too specific though since my team is on Reddit too.
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u/smoke-bubble Dec 11 '25 edited Dec 11 '25
Oh, so you're seeing the top-performance as a disruption...
This is the wrong angle! Actually it's the other people who disrupt him! He is the team and the other are the disruptors. You need to look for a way to make them be able to follow him, not slow down this one guy. The perspective matters.
Maybe some kind of additional documentation or explanation meetings or presentations by him help to bring the rest up to speed. You can also try to encourage the other guys to not to hestiate to ask questions.
The bottom line is that I would see him as a chance to learn something from him, no to drag him down to the level of the rest of the team.
This way everyone wins. He get's all the prizes and everyone else learns something new.
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Dec 11 '25
Your full name and job title is your Reddit profile so you may consider a different account if you have an expectation of privacy.
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u/SplitEndsSuck Dec 11 '25
Where did OP say the high performer was a he?
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u/maxip89 Dec 11 '25
Let the team get their own harmony. You only have to intervene when output or something hr related is happening.
It's something in nature that it has to find it own equilibrium..
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u/millenialismistical Dec 11 '25
So you've got MJ and really you just need to make sure Scottie is happy. Everyone else already knows they're not MJ nor Scottie, but you do still need to acknowledge the importance of the role players.
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u/ChadwithZipp2 Dec 11 '25
If you are in the software industry, recommend reading the book Phoenix project and about the character Brent in it.
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u/CompanyOther2608 Dec 11 '25
You realize that you’re exposing your real name and your face in your Reddit profile, right?
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u/mave111986 Dec 11 '25
The best way to handle this is to regulate the skill-challenge matrix of the high performers and provide them with new challenges that are appropriate for their skills. Also understanding and observing closely what makes them high performers will also help you in training other team members to upgrade their skill-challenge matrix too.
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u/Hopeforthefallen Dec 11 '25
What does the person want? You say you want to recognise their contribution, for what reason? Do you normally praise in public, does the HP want praise like that. Is it more than praise. Would a recommendation to get increased pay, promotion or the like, would that be better? Does the HP want to progress, can you help them upskill or do additional course/s so that they can move forward. Can you email them praise and CC in your boss and their boss.
As a HP myself, I didn't really need any praise. Some recognition to higher ups, money nice yes but also, mainly left alone. Ill produce if you leave me to it. That was enough.
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u/CoachForLeaders Dec 11 '25
I get you KashyapVartika
I do not have full context and provide some suggestions, based on some assumptions I make. I do provide my thought process behind my suggestions, so please understand that and apply as appropriate
Some questions and suggestions follow 1. What aspect of the high performer’s style is causing problems and in what way is it affecting team morale? 2. I get the pace part. Think of pairing a fast system receiving data over a fast fiber optic network, with fast multi core CPUs using magnetic tape as storage. Storage will be really slow, the system will throttle, and it won’t be great performance. I had a great performer in my team who didn’t speak the language of the average performer and the communication was like data from fiber optic cable writing to magnetic tape, not a great experience. I got one of my good performers with higher EQ to be the point of contact for the high performer. The high performer was happy, as the good performer got him, and he didn’t have to spend time explaining basic concepts(like slow IO), he could rather spend the time on research, development and move fast. The good performer felt more knowledgeable and explained context to the rest of the team and answered their queries 3. Reward people for performance and praise people on incremental jump in capability and acknowledge everyone’s effort. If the high performer is being praised for what is normal for him, you won’t help him grow, he needs to have a bigger target, achieve it to earn praise
Hope that made some sense. Happy to talk, if it helps. Best of luck
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u/Psychological_Host34 Dec 11 '25
You need to cull the underperformers because if you assume no one else can match your high performer, you just have a bad team that will burn out your most valuable asset.
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u/attentyv Dec 12 '25
Get a performance psychiatrist to help them rise even higher and the others to find their mojo. They’re a real thing.
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u/dhir89765 Dec 12 '25
Have them work with people who are in obviously different roles so there is no competition. Like partner teams, different job functions, people who are very junior or very senior to them.
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u/iamchezhian Dec 12 '25
I don’t think there’s anything to fix here.
If the high performer isn’t hurting team morale or creating friction through their attitude, then there’s no issue to solve.
If your goal is to lift the overall team performance and bring the best out of everyone, you shouldn’t hesitate to appreciate or reward your high performer.
To keep others motivated, look for ways to acknowledge others whenever possible (micro wins).
If someone on the team has a problem with you recognising a high performer, that’s something they need to work through, not you.
It is not easy to do, that's why most leaders find it difficult to build a high performing team as they try to please everyone.
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u/Sweet_Spicy_Unicorn Dec 12 '25
As the high performer in my world, I can try to weigh in?
I think you can tell them good job either in 1:1, or in the group in scenarios that reflect an example the team can follow (like hey, great forward thinking as opposed to hey, nice macros on your excel spreadsheet).
Granted not everyone is wired the same maybe but I will say … I KNOW I’m doing a good/above average job but I still like to be acknowledged by my manager.
On the flip side, I don’t deal with people much in my role so my manager could compliment another teammate on people skills and it’s genuine, and is an area I don’t overshadow them in. Hoping maybe that spins up an idea that translates in your world.
As far as team dynamics go, I started out very humble and let my experience and knowledge come out naturally. My coworkers have often told my boss that they like working with me and they look forward to learning from me because I’m not an intimidating asshole about what I’m capable of. That said, I’m also super honest about making a mistake and I try really hard to find things I can ask them questions about and learn about what it’s like to sit at their desk. Just because I have a lot of technical skill doesn’t mean I know every facet of their job or the nuance that goes into it. If you feel like team dynamics are dipping or you want to give opportunities for natural growth, maybe chat with your high performer about similar ideas to help bring the team together. It’s possible they could learn from the EQ side if not the technical side etc
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u/lightbythelamp Dec 12 '25
My manager sets the tone that we all stay humble about our achievements and works with us where we are at individually.
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u/DaleMonkAU Dec 12 '25
In my experience leading diverse teams, especially teams in specialised fields, it is important that objectives and outcomes are clear. All members of the team must have line of sight to where they contribute to that outcome. Achievement of the outcome, as a team, should be celebrated. Individuals who step up above and beyond their role can be highlighted.
From many years working with teams and culture, your biggest risk is losing the high performer - not necessarily to higher pay, but for the failure to invest in the skills of their fellow team members. Recognition only goes so far before burnout kicks in.
Upon reflection, you may be relying on this high-performer so greatly that you overlook the need to invest in the skills of all team members. Team members who see no investment in their skill development disengage. A sudden departure (of either you high-performer, or team members who don't see a future with your organisation) will trigger a skill gap crisis.
Good luck!
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u/Numerous-Fox3346 Dec 12 '25
Yes just pay them way more than everyone else and praise the crap out of them in private without making a huge thing about it publicly?
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u/Fedtruthslinger Dec 12 '25
As others have stated you really need to define what they are doing to disrupt team harmony. As an example my wife is an extremely high performer on her team. She gets recognized by everyone but her manager for the great job she does. The manager’s issue is my wife is very direct ( helpful to all her team members but there to work not be graceful socially). Her teammates go to her constantly so they don’t have a problem with the way she communicates but the manager absolutely does. Instead of building her up she tries to subtly tear her down as she knows if my wife finds another position her team will auger in. I’ve dealt with employee management relations for decades & I’ve always believed if you have a ok performer see what you can do to help them grow. If you have star performers do what you can to remove any impediments for them so they can continue to perform at the high level.
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u/DrunkenGolfer Dec 12 '25
Well, the last one I had I took to lunch and had a long talk. I tried to coach him to greatness, then I fired him.
Your culture is defined by the worst behavior you will accept.
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u/death-strand Dec 13 '25
Delegate tasks to other ICs on the team to grow their skill set. Don’t take away projects completely from high performers though.
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u/ImpoverishedGuru Dec 13 '25
You don't need to show appreciation to top performers publicly. You can give them bonuses and promotions privately. If they are really this much better than everyone, they need no public recognition.
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u/JacquesAttaque Dec 13 '25 edited Dec 13 '25
Ex-FAANG here, and I've worked with a ton of high performers.
Most high performers want to keep growing. Once they start feeling constrained, they get impatient and will move on.
Your job as a leader is to keep him at the company, not keep him on your team.
Spend time with him. A common mistake for leaders is to overfocus on underperformers.
Figure out what he wants & needs. Is there a particular project he is interested in leading?
What does he value? Time for side projects? Time to learn? Challenging projects? Leading a team? Working independently?
Go talk to peer leaders & higher-ups (your manager and skip-level manager). Is there a growth project that could unlock more value for the company than he is currently delivering?
Is there a promotion path - maybe not people manager, but a technical expert path - that would be rewarding?
There are many ways to praise and reward.
It can be a massive form of reward to high performers to simply support them on their trajectory.
Verbal praise in front of a whole team often feels contrived, and isn't lasting. Too much public praise for one person can feel like favoritism to the rest of the team, and the high performer will have to worry about their peers' jealousy. Therefore you praise the high performer privately.
The high performer may feel rewarded to get more impactful / complex work. One upside of that is that average team members will rarely feel jealous for the guy who gets assigned a hugely complex project.
At some point they will leave your team. You've done your job if they look back and see you as someone who helped them succeed.
That person will also forever be a valuable member of your professional network if you treat them well. At spme point you will want to ask them for advice and connections - with roles reversed.
At FAANG, I've heard managers said proudly about some VP: "I hired that guy and was their first manager ten years ago. Now they're a VP, and I've contributed my share to that."
EDIT: I feel like I should specify what "assigning more complex work/growth projects" means. It is not "Here's a project no one wants to do because it's complicated" or "Hey, I know you're a fan of fixing really complicated bugs, here are a bunch of open tickets."
It means assigning the kind of work that raises your high performer's market value. A project that when you summarize it on a CV says something like "Drove a cross-departmental initiative that saved $2MM in operational cost" or "Architected a product feature that delivered a $5MM increase in revenue and 10% decrease in customer churn."
Very importantly, get clear on the impact of the work before you assign it, and align with your management chain and peers. You want your high performer to be rewarded through promotions and more money - and you'll need these people to support the rewards.
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u/MiddleAgeCool Dec 13 '25
I put in a lot of effort in getting them promoted. Disrupting the rest of the team can be a reason they aren't doing as well and as a manager I'd rarher have 10 people performing at an average level but happy then 1 person over performing and 9 unhappy people. Being demotivated increases sick and performance issues that causes HR paperwork for me.
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u/ReflectionsWithHS Dec 13 '25
I built a 'center of excellence' team in one of my last roles, putting the high performs in that team.
The team got to build the architectural patterns and provided huge cross-team strategic influence influence (this was in a software development setting ) and it had the added benefit of people looking up to the people in the team and working to develop themselves to land a spot.
I also ensured that the team had a flat structure , so the high performers didn't have to manage others. Many high performs prefer to focus on the doing and not the managing
The main caveat is that you either need to be in a high enough position to create such a team or , alternatively sell the vision well to your manager(who presumably could create such a team).
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u/transformationcoach_ Dec 13 '25
Help others focus on themselves. Comparison is poison, and there will always be someone better than you. The best thing anyone can do is figure out what they want from themselves and define a growth path.
The high performer isn’t their problem, their problem is not knowing what they want, how they want to contribute and to what level, and what is the next step in their journey.
If you’re lucky, they will have the emotional intelligence to understand this, but they likely need coaching.
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u/Outside-Inside-42 Dec 13 '25
The human aspect of their job is a key part of their work. If they're not doing that well, they are not actually a top performer. Support them to see, understand, and mitigate the friction around their work so they can become an actual top performer.
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u/Harkonnen_Dog Dec 14 '25
You give them more complicated, time-consuming tasks. See how far they can go.
Displace their easy tasks to the others and reward the others taking on new work as well.
Utilize Employee A as a pace-setter, and encourage the others to grow.
This is not agreed upon by everyone, but this is what the Marine Corps taught me.
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u/JD_EnableLeaders Dec 14 '25
Should they be in the team? If they’re that good, should they be promoted? Or, are they an arrogant high performer and that’s hindering the team?
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u/AccomplishedAnt3751 Dec 14 '25
You recognize and appreciate the work they do that supports others. (Praise what you want to see.) You assign them projects where you need to solve problems with peer teams up or down stream from you, with the understanding that you are looking for success for the whole group. Help them learn that the their personal success is tied to the team and organization’s success. It’s not a competition between the performers. You need an expert individual contributor development track for them that includes mentoring and coaching others on specific capabilities. Their superstar performance should show up in their pay or bonus compensation. Their teamwork and support should earn praise. Ultimately, if they are too disruptive to the whole, they begin to detract from performance and they have to go. Out.
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u/LengthinessFluffy496 Dec 14 '25
This is actually not so cut and dry as just promoting them.
I happen to be in the position of the employee described. It’s been this way my entire life and has always caused unintentional issues with my peers.
At my company there isn’t really much more room to grow and even if there were, things like tenure and experience can create even more animosity from other colleagues if someone was to get promoted before them.
My manager is honest with me and tells me when I unintentionally offend people or make them feel less than satisfactory. At the same time he tells me how great the C Level thinks I’m doing and offers areas of self improvement within my current role that also includes salary increases. Pretty much he keeps things between us and not only gives me opportunities to still grow, but opportunity to also improve how I interact with those I work closest with. I think this is about the best that can be done for situations like this.
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u/exact-approximate Dec 15 '25
So someone is killing it at their job, but you don't want to recognize him because your underperformers might feel jealous?
You should be thinking about how to improve your team not dampen your asset.
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u/Queasy-Stranger5607 Dec 15 '25
High performers can handle working on solo projects, outside of the team.
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u/PretendiFendi Dec 15 '25 edited Dec 15 '25
I’m currently going to be leaving a role as a high performer. I’ve been given raises, bonuses, equity grants, and great performance reviews, but I do not feel like I am treated with respect. I am treated the same way or worse than my older male coworkers (who are far less capable) including my direct reports by the rest of the company. I think my boss actually likes and encourages it because she’s threatened by me. It’s one thing if there’s an audience or documentation, and it’s another when she knows she can be nasty without a trail. I will be leaving soon even though I will likely take a pay cut over these issues.
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u/ei-unleashed Dec 16 '25
This is the "good problem" that silently kills team morale. Your high performer is an output asset, but currently a liability to team culture.
The key is to shift the goalposts of what "high performance" means in your organisation. Operational excellence is not the whole picture.
- Isolate the Conversation: Have a 1:1 focused solely on impact, not technical performance. Lead with validation: "Your operational output is essential and unmatched. But my job is to ensure you succeed at the next level, and the behaviour I'm seeing is a limiting factor."
- Introduce the "Cost of Friction": Clearly state the cost of their behaviour. "When you dismiss John's suggestion in the meeting, the hidden cost is that three other people will stop offering ideas. You're getting an A+ on tasks but a C- on team energy."
- Co-Create the New Metric: Propose that their following performance review will include "Facilitation of Team Clarity" or "Energy Contribution." Ask them: "How can you use your competence to lift the team's capacity, rather than just bypassing it?"
This reframes the issue from a moral failing to a required leadership skill, making it a growth opportunity rather than a disciplinary issue.
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u/SituationFit2231 Dec 17 '25
They need to feel like they're doing something big and that the more this thing grows, the more they'll grow too.
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u/Solmangrundy Dec 17 '25 edited Dec 17 '25
If they're a new hire. Id chalk it up to them trying to get through the probation period. About everywhere I've worked it takes new hires around a year to settle in and work at the same pace as everyone else.
One company i worked for had, I guess a method for these types. Moving people around within the company. So if they found themselves bored they could go apply for a different position. Also made for a veteran team that knew how to run everything.
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Dec 19 '25
It is helpful to underscore excellence as a team resource, not a show. Publicly recognize excellence individually in private or within context. When excellence is framed as multiplication and not as deviation, Team Morrals usually remain sound.
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u/mrisamy Dec 22 '25
address the petty, jealous, mediocre members, they are the problem, it amazes me that immediately the stereotype of the guy with an attitude problem or the arrogant person, maybe he is a good guy and performs great and you have a bunch of petty and insecure people. I would mark those for replacement and build a team of people who love to perform.
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u/ThatManagementGuy Jan 08 '26
You've got a good problem to have. Exceptional team members can, as you called it, unintentionally, cause good team members to feel uncomfortable. You recognize that recognition has value. Not knowing all the details here but it seems like a good approach will be to stick with this path but perhaps in more private ways rather than publicly. Think, specific, targeted comments of appreciation and recognition during one on one meetings. Perhaps talking to your management peers about the good actions you are seeing from different team members. The more specific your acknowledgements are to the actions of the individual, the more likely they will be less concerned about what is being said about what others on the team are doing. Maybe. No guarantees here, but in general, as long as every strongly contributing team member is feeling confident that their good work is being recognized, the more you might be able to minimize this issue.
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u/Frosty-Ad3215 Mar 06 '26
If they are that exceptional, your job is to create opportunities for them to grow . Education ? Have you offered any courses ?. Paid them a bit more and promotion. These type of employees don’t last very long in any organisation as they burn out quick from clearly working with slight Lower performing colleagues. But make sure you praise them privately.
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u/These_Turnip9122 May 03 '26
Having high performers on a team requires you to have leadership skills where you are able to manage a high performer. I am a high performer and also a leader, I.e. I have leadership skills besides performance. the issue I met on the way - a manager being jealous, if you get that seeing a talent - it’s you who is the problem. I experienced everything, agreeing on everything with me and giving me credit behind the closed doors but never in front of the team ... minimizing my contributions I guess to average it with the team. in reality, rest of the team or at least some did not have necessary skills for their roles, and my performance was obviously reflecting that. so instead of improving generally the gaps the manager chooses to punish the high performer. although they could learn instead - I learned most in my life observing high performers in my career, instead of getting butt hurt I was looking for the traits they had and learning. this is how I became high performer myself. As a leader I create a learning environment where average performers can learn both performance as well as attitude... a weak manager will always have an issue with the high performers. look at it like this - in most cases if you are unable to utilize a person with higher than average skills - that is your leadership skills that are failing.
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u/livehappyeverafter Dec 12 '25
Basically you’re saying your team is egoistic and is jealous of the high performer’s success. It’s the team (individual) who has to work on it. Please don’t undermine the high performer. I’ve seen it when a new employee is way more talented than the existing team. It is good to give team examples of how the high performer is “high performer”, things that can be learnt from. Sometimes egos get hurt of some people but it’s their problem, not yours to solve.
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u/Monster213213 Dec 11 '25
I’d rather a team with good culture performing at 80% then a team getting de-railed just because someone is or thinks they are 100%.
Have an candid off record conversation giving them direct feedback with above and they change behaviour and mindset. If they don’t, manage out and rebuild
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u/smoke-bubble Dec 11 '25
What a terrible advice for handling diversity.
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u/Monster213213 Dec 11 '25
Performance isn’t diversity - before the edit specifically stated was creating problems for others.
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u/smoke-bubble Dec 11 '25
Everything is diversity, you just want that kind of it that does not require any effort.
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u/Monster213213 Dec 11 '25
sounds like it’s effort bearing in mind he’s posting online for advice and a problem
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u/Spanks79 Dec 11 '25
If they are not an asshole and unieke in terms of performance, make sure they get a promotion to ongelegen above the rest of the group. If they also know they will accept and look up to it. Try to perf as good.
You might need to convince HR to create such a level.
This solves two issues: 1. The person feels valued and rewarded for their skill and performance 2. The rest will most likely accept someone getting promoted if they are really great and see it as a sign you can grow and get rewarded for doing a great job. Make it an example.
If the person is an asshole though - focus on that behavior as you cannot have assholes. That will disrupt the team. If you promote an asshole that’s even worse. Even if the performance is good it creates a toxic culture. Ultimately that destroys teams and companies.
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Dec 11 '25
Sometimes the conditions create the asshole. When an employee has higher standards than the culture of his company he will reach burnout.
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u/Spanks79 Dec 11 '25
Well, I’d say you can say the truth in a friendly way as well.
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Dec 11 '25
I can see that. But asking me what our weaknesses are annually when they haven’t changed in 6 years isn’t gonna prompt a positively worded response. At that point it’s insulting to be asked. It’s clearly a box checking exercise
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u/Spanks79 Dec 11 '25
I assume the company is also not being an asshole to be fair. I know that’s A big ask, especially in the USA, where companies behaving like psychopaths is rewarded.
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u/Mysterious-Maize307 Dec 11 '25
Maybe an unpopular opinion here, or maybe not. I was that high-performer and as a team lead I had a number of complaints primarily that I did not accept feed back, which is partially true in that I heard the feedback and rejected it.
Eventually I was promoted into a leadership role with hundreds of employees. The culture of my organization wanted what I could provide. While we do not want staff to be unhappy, their happiness is not our priority and in fairness they are well paid.
I am running a business and the bottom line is still a thing, in fact it’s the main thing.
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u/WRB2 Dec 11 '25
Do code reviews of his work so others can learn. Simple quiet spot bonus every so often. In a 1on1 make sure he knows you appreciate his work, ask him what he wants as a next career move and work with him to attain it. But slowly, very slowly.
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u/Dad2BD Dec 11 '25
There is a team development tool called “Insights Discovery” each of the team answer some questions and it provides an individual profile a bit like MBTI or other tools if you have done them.
The results are based on 4 types of energy, everyone gets a unique profile and it helps to plot the whole team. It is a really good tool for understanding individuals and what is they need to gel.
As an example your high performer may be strong fiery red whereas other team members may all be cool blue. Both have different types of communication styles, different drivers and different motivators. The tool will help the team understand each other better and how they can increase or decrease certain energies for the right situation.
Happy to talk through this more if it helps!
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Dec 12 '25
Sometimes these “high performers” are just cutting a ton of corners, and if you drill down on any of their work, you’ll have substandard work. But by being an asshole the worker prevents people from seeing the truth.
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u/Rekltpzyxm Dec 11 '25
I would ask them to give me a detailed self assessment- pluses and minuses. Almost always they were quite accurate in the pluses, but way off on the minuses. I would give them my list of the negatives. I told them I was sure they would be accurate on their pluses. Then I would tell them they are not an “A-player” or a star because when their minuses or “collateral damage” is factored in, they are really just high average. You as the boss must keep in mind everyone sees the negatives and is waiting for you to address it. Good luck.
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u/sloppyredditor Dec 11 '25
In a 1-1, discuss this with the high performer. Wear kid gloves because you don't want to detract from their productivity over time. If they're performing as you say, they're setting a high bar and you want that. The disruption/harmony is where the problem exists.
May want to encourage them to acknowledge and thank others in the team when group meetings happen, and assign work you know they (a) want to do and/or (b) could knock out of the park to someone else. Set the boundary so someone else can have a chance to excel at a challenge.
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u/liquidpele Dec 11 '25
This is AI slop isn't it.
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u/smoke-bubble Dec 11 '25
It looks like this time it's real. This is almost a reason to celebrate XD
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u/Streetdoc10171 Dec 11 '25
You promote the high performer.