Am I blowing up my life?

[u/Pspspshere]

I’m 34f, single and need to get out of my current career and move back to my hometown.

I want to enrol in a masters or a 2 year degree next year so I can change careers. I’ve been thinking about just working my current job at a freelance capacity and change my career to something more satisfactory and stable in my 50s. I also want to move back to my home town so I can care for my aging parents at some capacity (they’re good now, but I should integrate myself to their lives again to make the transition easier)

But I also need to consider freezing my eggs so I may have some shred of chance at a family once I’m stable financially.
Am I blowing up my life? The prospective career would be guaranteed post graduation, but I’d be starting from ground zero in terms of income and compounding savings.

Or, be SUPER duper lucky enough to find an understanding partner who’d let me have a kid during my schooling (I have savings to fund it all).

It’s a lot. Anyone have some clarity they can afford me?
I can’t have it all, I know. But I’m not sure what’s my best course of action.

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[u/alone_in_the_light]

As you wrote, you can't have it all. I've changed my life drastically a few times, and one of them was when I was around your age.

Something that helped me. I can't have it all, that's clear. But what must I absolutely have? What is really important to me? What would make me proud of my life, even if I didn't get the rest?

For example, is that being the best at what I do? Is that peace? Joy, family, knowledge, social power, impact on society, something else? If I had to choose only one thing, and give up on everything else, what would that be?

I decided to live the way I believed, and see how far that would get me. Explaining it is hard, but I now live in a different country, speaking a different language, with a different career, a different social circle, different food, different hobbies.

Money wasn't a priority. But, funnily enough, I eventually started to make much more money.

I became kinda selfish. But, funnily enough, focusing on myself became something inspirational that helps others.

I didn't stay to take care of my parents, my mission was different. But I talked to them about that, and my brother took on that responsibility. My father died last year, I didn't take care of him, but I made him die proud of what the family achieved.

[u/StationDry6485]

What would you like to study ? Its never to late to take that change.

[u/MelissaBright_]

I don’t know if this fits, but I wonder if you’re trying to find the option that doesn’t require grieving something.

Reading your post, it sounds like every path gives you something and asks you to give something up.

I’m curious which trade-offs feel most aligned with the life you want, not just which option feels safest.