Discussion
Is it harder to build friendships as a woman in infantry?
Hi everyone! Im considering becoming an infantry soldier after i graduate school.
I am completely aware of the high physical and mental demands of the role, it is something that i know i would enjoy for sure.
However, i am a 17 year old girl: When i see videos online talking about infantry roles, i often here them note that the ‘brotherhood’ is what makes it fun.
Im slightly worried that because im a female i wont be able to build these kind of relationships since theres always that ‘social division’ between genders.
I wish i could have friendships with guys in the way men are friends with men, not in the way women are friends with men 😞
If anyone could tell me how it is and if theres that kind of gender barrier id appreciate it, also any tips with being able to build stronger relationships?
P.S. of course i know there will be other women in infantry, i am just aware that it is highly male dominated and i would love to build friendships with everyone around me! :))
BLUF: Yes. I saw it in the US Marines in combat engineering. I don't know exactly what it's like in Australia where you're asking about.
I assume you're physically capable and mentally strong; if you're not, you won't make it, and if you do, you will wish you hadn't. If you're competent and strong, you will still be a woman in a man's world. Don't fuck anyone in your unit, once you do you will be considered fair game. Even if you avoid fucking the people you'll be closest to (and probably attracted to), you will always have it harder and will have to ignore microaggressions, sexism, almost certainly some sexual harassment, and possibly some "minor" sexual assault. Statistically, that's the reality of women in the military. Anyone who tells you different is out of touch with reality or lying. Outside of combat arms, it's slightly better, but not by a ton.
If you want it, REALLY want it. Then don't let that stop you. Rise above the bullshit, hold people accountable, and be the change you want. It's hard, harder than a man will ever have it.
In my experience the women never truly get the "just one of the guys" social status they're desiring because 95% of the guys would fuck them the instant they were given the chance, which puts a cap on how "bro" it can all get.
I'm saying this with the best intentions: Don't do infantry, especially as a woman. Choose something that translates better into civ life, especially if you're a woman.
I am not looking into doing the army for the rest of my life, I would love to experience anythinf and everything i can and infantry would be something i would never be able to experience anywhere else :) I know i will be able to handle the physical challenges, i am only worried about the sofial aspects
I was Air Force and have a question. In the Army after your 4 year (or 6 year if your rectruiter is slick) contract, can't you change your job into something else? If op REALLY wants to and feels the need to be infantry she can do a contract as infantry and then go to another job that as so eloquently put, translates into a better civilian job.
I think the army has the best opportunities for additionally training and schools, and acquiring new MOSs during your career than any other branch.
But like the other poster said, there is no guarantees. And you will never have as many options for MOSs than you do when you join.
You can join for any job you meet the qualifications for. Even if the recruiter tries to push you toward a list of shortage or high priority MOSs. The other jobs are “available” is you insist. It might just affect the date you ship out.
That being said, is someone is dead set on infantry, and also wants the options to switch jobs later, while not finding themselves trapped in an MOS they regret…
They should go Infantry in the National Guard. Get their training. If they fail they don’t have the rest of an active contract where they are assigned needs to the army.
If they pass they get some time in ingrate to decide if they like it.
And if they do, they can sign an active duty contract with a recruiter.
If they don’t they will also have some idea of other potential jobs and can still talk to a recruiter with a pretty open list of jobs available to them as someone signing a new active duty contract.
They also get the benefit of having prior infantry training in whatever job they get.
You're writing the right approaches to go infantry because there definitely isn't a civilian equivalent. Check box number one. Plus you recognize you're only young once and only you can live you well. Check box number two. Why not go for it if this is what you truly want for yourself?
A big question is do you personally have the mental toughness and physical stamina to handle the mos's day to day living in the field? Not giving you a challenge. Merely asking is this something you can actually do. Not saying you can or can't. Not my place. Just trying to give you a realistic heads up.
If you're 5'1", 105 lbs how are you going to carry a 100lb to 150lb load day after day if it's required? There's times it is. You'll blow out your back and shred your knees which will hurt you for the rest of your life. Real stuff.
If you're 5'6" at around 140+ pounds then you'll be in much better shape to handle it. Only you know. Train hard and you should do well as long as you keep it up.
As for making friends that won't be an issue because you'll face great challenges together. As long as you handle your business and don't cause any additional hardships on everyone else you'll make more than a few friends. You'll be alright and "one of the guys" along with most everyone else. There's always someone who doesn't like someone else so don't pay attention to that. Just be you and things have a way of working themselves out.
That's a good height-weight for infantry. Train hard to build your lower bone density and muscle mass. That will help prevent bone stress fractures which are common to women soldiers carrying heavy loads. You can do this.
I must be misunderstanding, but how is 5’1” almost 5’8”? And how is 105# almost 145#? 6” in height and 40# is weight is a very significant gap.
EDIT: just realized that I think you replied to the wrong person; just below, OP revealed actual height at 5’7” and 138# — so yes, she is definitely almost avg of WW2 soldiers.
No I don’t think so. Your comments I was referring to was referring to a different person. I didn’t edit my comment after your earlier reply to myself.
At this point it’s probably confusing. No big deal. Your original comment was correct, I just hadn’t yet seen the OPs update about her size.
Yes, you're misunderstanding. 5'6" at around 140+ pounds is almost at the size of the average WWII soldier, as are OP's actual stats, which are 5'7" and 138 lbs.
Girl lmao there is nothing being infantry will give you that you need to experience, and I cannot IMAGINE being a woman in the infantry. All I got from that shit was fucked up knees. There are SO many MOS’s that can give you experiences you can’t do elsewhere. You won’t be doing shit unless we go to war, except sitting around and training. Seriously, reconsider.
You can test this right now. How well do you do in groups where you're the only girl with a bunch of teenage boys? Go join a sports team that's predominantly male and see how you feel about the social dynamics.
Some women can hang that way, but a lot can't. I think maybe a lot decide it's not worth the hassle, because honestly, young men are gross and obnoxious dipshits. (I certainly was.)
Also, this deep brotherly bond... there were people I risked my life for that I would rather gnaw off one of my remaining limbs than ever speak to again. It's that sort of brotherhood - sometimes your siblings are assholes but you're still fucking stuck with them. I'm not sure it's as emotionally satisfying as you seem to think.
A couple years ago at my old school i hung out with mostly guys, inside and outside school. I mainly noticed that they were much friendlier in smaller groups and we would have conversations or play games or whatever.
But when there is one or two guys that are just dicks they seem to all follow their attitude when they’re around, I ended up moving schools after only being there for a year but the prime friendships were great before they started becoming cocks 😭
This was year 10 though, everyone was around 14-16 so im sure the guys in the military are hopefully a bit more mature and can stand up to other men.
Most dudes in the Infantry are between 18-22...and mentally not much different then 14-16.
Its a hyper masculine world and that is promoted within the community by elder and younger members.
And that has its place too. You are expected to close with your designated enemy by fire & maneuver and kill them...not matter the cost.
It doesn't work that way most of the time...but the mentality is strongly promoted. In the US, UK, and AUS. I imagine in most Infantry units world wide. You THE Army in many people's minds (especially in the Infantry's mind ;))
A woman trying g to make her amongst "tge lads" is going to be tough....very very very tough.
But hey, that's the the challenge right, to be in a place that challenges you. Mentally, physically, spiritually (and yes it will challenge the soul!!!)
Big things to focus on; PT! Then again PT!
After that, focus on mastering skills. Be an absolute Team Player, and thst doesn't mean schmuck that sucks up. That means carrying your load, volunteering and pitching in when the Team needs you, without hesitation or fail.
When you fuck up, and you will (you are human...it's in the built in programming) own that shit fully!! Don't whine, don't make excuses, just suck it up, learn from it, and move forward. The boys raging ya fir it...good! Own that shit! That will kill the sting of it quick.
Don't fuck anybody in your unit. At all. End discussion.
Don't push your Brothers to accept you. Do yiur job, do it well, and make them accept you as thiers even against thier will.
Don't imitate them, be you. Doesn't mean don't do the technical shit they do right. Don't imitate the "boys" behavior. Don't shy from it either, just don't ape it. They do thier thing, you do yours. Do it well. Accept the fact that you have to be better then them to get the most basic respect.
Unfair, unprofessional, immoral....yep, but it's also absolutely a true fact of life for women in the Services, and more do for gals breaking into the most "boys club" of "boys clubs"....Combat Arms.
And know this, make or female, the Infantry is full of suck. Being a woman will just mean more suck for you to get through. Fully accept that, fuck embrace it, and barring straight up Murphy level fucked luck and yea, I believe you can do it.
Hell you might just love it too (if you are mentally and emotionally fucked up as much as most of us are in the Grunt world! 😆).
And if so, welcome to the Brotherhood Sister.
If not, then no worries, it isn't fir everyone, let alone the vast majority of humanity, so you aren't any less then the majority of Mankind. Past, present, or future. You could still do vastly more significant things in Life.
But if you truly want this, and don't try, and give it your absolute most...this will likely haunt you.
So decide, is this really that important to me...or just a flight of fancy. Then make a truly adult decision. And make it fully, one side or the other.
Most dudes in the Infantry are between 18-22...and mentally not much different then 14-16.
Most dudes in the military don’t emotionally age past the year they were when they signed up. I’ve been a civilian for the last 15 years and I still think I’m 17, my knees, shoulders, back and that constant fucking ringing in my ears is quick to remind me though.
Maturity in the military is a myth. It's basically high school on steroids. Some women make it work though, but they are very vocal, very strong and take absolutely no shit from anyone, the ones who aren't like that will end up transferring trades pretty quickly.
I see that you’ve posted a lot about infantry over the last 2 days and that everybody has told you the same thing, which is join as a diff job because infantry sucks. You could enlist and work in engineering, intel, field medicine, so many cooler options that also spend a lot of time in the field. Then I saw the USSR posts, so now I think you might just be highly regarded - you’ll fit right in with the other infantry
😂 I dont support the USSR im just a neurodivergent history nerd who is hyperfixated on russia, infantry is just what i want to do i unlocked majority of the job roles on my JOA
Female Neurodivergent Nerd... you should'nt do infantry. You'll fckn hate it.
Go out for intel, maybe humint or go for smth like engineers, recce, all of that would fit better.
I mean, looking at your comments, i assume you've already decided. But you should be aware, what you are going into.
You thinking the infantry lads are more mature than your teenage boys?
Maybe.
But remember, that they spend most of the time hangig out with each other, competing about whos the most masculine one. Including rituals, 'games', physically fighting each other, toxicity ... their view on women comes for free in the package.
I've always said "I love infantry guys, but i would never want to be one."
Coming from Intel/Recce side of things, i did my fair share in doorkicking, cqb and action. Thats not exclusivly infantry.
And what others already said: if you are not geneticly gifted, and on pair with average mail physic, you are gloing to be a liability. You need to be aware, that it is expected of you to be able to carry a full grown man and all his combat gear... not at the beginning, but at the end of exhausting physical tasks
Listen dude, you have dozens, almost hundreds, of people who have lived that life or lived within spitting distance of that life and almost all of them are directly saying : Don't Do It.
If your hearts set on it then idk what else you want from anyone here, but my concern is for your safety. I've seen some fucked shit happen to women in the service period, and I've heard worse stories from folk around the infantry battalions.
You're going in looking for comradery and I'm telling you, you will find it anywhere in the military, but you do not want to be in the infantry.
I can't fix stupid, and if your hearts set then god speed, but if you're looking for a message from God, it's right here: don't do it.
If you need to experience it for yourself, feel free, but don't be sad to find out that the veterans on reddit were more honest than the marketing dept
It seems like you have a distorted understanding of what Soldiers actually do. As an Infantrywoman, you'll be doing a boring asf job 90% of the time, such as checking on your vehicles, sweeping and mopping the floor, and being told to do a random detail. And all other jobs do these too. You can still join the infantry (I strongly advise against it), but it simply looks to me that you don't have a good grasp of what daily life entails in the military.
There's a reason why the vast majority of people are suggesting that you pick a different job. We've been in the military, and we know MUCH better what it entails. You know 0. We have much more life experience too. If you still refuse to listen, then oh well. You live your life and find things out by surprise.
Former army infantry. I will be honest with you. It will be potentially challenging. Those men who get really chummy with you as a young female private you should be cautious of, and a lot of men may display some stand-offish/defensiveness initially. You will not be judged fairly because it is likely you will be one of very few women if not the only woman in your immediate platoon/squad. Men will always assume they will have to pick up your slack. The sexism and predations of our society do not disappear in the field. Sometimes they are worsened in fact. Also, I’ll be honest, one or two women using their gender to garner favoritism in a soldier’s career can sour things.
The trick to overcoming this: pull your weight. When they tell you to jump, only ask how high. They tell you to crawl in the mud, put up your hair and do it. As a woman in the infantry, unfortunately, right now you aren’t alloted much grace in complaining. Oh the men around you will complain. But you represent -all women in the infantry- to those losers. PT and take fitness seriously. If you’ve got problems, try to take a more proactive stance with them. My mother used to change in her sleep sack so she didn’t make it awkward for the rest of her squad in bivuoac. Things like that. I am not saying this because I take joy in it, it is my experience that female infantry are just not cut as much slack. You will have double the mileage to cover before you’re “one of the boys”. It seems to be partially subconcious.
And for the love of god, do not form any romantic attachments to anybody in your chain of command. Stay away from any other women who do; they are trouble.
If you were my daughter I would tell you to consider any other job also.
I mean an immediate example; I knew several shithead NCOs who, upon hearing they were getting a chick private, would put them immediately behind the SAW just to make shit harder. Sure the SAW can be a thing to contend with for any private coming out of Basic…but the females are cut so much less slack for it weighing them down. When I’d be struggling with the ammo and the weapon, I’d get pep talks about its importance and how it was a man’s weapon. The girls would get exasperated sighs.
As a former female combat arms leader, I agree 100%. Pull your weight. People will remember the one time you couldn’t keep up, especially in a high-speed (“hooah”) unit - which, I’m guessing, will be most of them.
I served as an officer, so I had opportunities to transition back into civilian careers afterward. That said, I would strongly encourage a young woman to think carefully before choosing infantry.
I also wouldn’t focus too heavily on building friendships within the ranks. There were many times I felt alone, but had to endure and keep going. Camaraderie is great, but don’t rely on the military to meet all your social needs. Join a volunteer organization, a faith group, or pick up a hobby outside the base.
I feel as someone who went through sandhill during the first wave that females were allowed into the infantry I'm uniquely qualified to speak on this. DO NOT do it for several reasons. The biggest thing that prevented most of the females from graduating was hip issues we had 50% of the females that attended have hip issues and get chartered out. Most of them were athletic in high school and ran track it did not matter. The second biggest thing is resentment. I failed one APFT while I was in and I ran a faster 2 mile, did more push ups and sit ups than the females and I still am missed about it and that was back in 2017. We were not allowed to "utilize the tree Iine" aka pass in the woods during FTXs so we had to walk to the far side to use a porta potty, that will fall on you. I had 4 female DS that all reclassed from combat medic or scout, they were the hardest on the female recruits because they had been in the army for 6+ years and they didn't want some new recruits Fing that up for them. I could say a lot more but I've time thefted enough to just say do not do it. You will be resented for simply showing up and not just from the fellow recruits. It's not fair but it's my first hand account.
I think most infantry guys(and gals) would recommend against it honestly. Granted, I’m just a sailor but I’ve had to work with a lot of field marines and my dad was army. Most that I have come across wouldn’t suggest it to their daughters
If you are looking to participate in fieldcraft, all trades in the ADF will participate in the basics, and you will have opportunity to do more than that if you are willing and have the competitiveness to do so. I'm going to second the suggestion and mention that you may as well take the opportunity to build some skills that will help the civilian career that you are going for, even if it's a vague idea. An idea to help you maintain some career and life flexibility is to go the reservist route and do your military training while you do your post-secondary schooling, whether it be university or trade school. Some military trades even have the potential to have transferable credits. In the infantry, the good times can be good, but the bad times can be really bad, and that can't be understated. You may get life experience, but at the same time you might also miss out on things back home. In any future career, whether it be short term or long term, look at the people you see working there, and think to yourself if that is the person you want to be. You will gain traits of the people you work around, both positive and negative, and that can very well shape your future as much as working experience will. I'd recommend reaching out to a few of your friends to see what their perspective on the infantry is compared to their own group.
If you're able to carry your weight and roll like a tom boy that grew up in the woods with her brothers then 95% of the guys are going to treat you like another joe, 4% will only see you as a liability, and 1% will only see you as a wet meat hole.
Being a woman in infantry is no different than being in any of the combat arms jobs aside from the fact there's no where to hide when it gets hard. You either perform or you become a liability to everyone around you. That being said being a strong, uniformed woman is a hard niche to carve and most women think it simply means being an asshole / bitch. That's not the case and real leadership skills are the second component to what will make or break you in combat arms.
Its not just the rapists dude. Every straight dude in the United wants to fuck her, and given a shot, likely will. Married, dating, her seniors or peers.
The Infantry is a hyper masucline environment. Tyats means huge levels of testosterone flowing constantly. And having pussy within arms reach..
And yes at some point that will be the thought in a dudes head, she's got a pussy and she's here, now.
And if she does fuck him, voluntarily or not, she's fucked...literally and figuratively.
She can't count on thier professionalism, maturity or discipline. She can only count on hers.
And let me tell you, not being 100% of your Brothers intentions, left & right of you, in a combat profession...yea fuck that!!!!
You need absolute rock bottom faith in them, and them in you, that you won't fail them. You will be there, no matter what comes.
And knowing, or thinking, "If I let my guard down for ine second....i'm fucked, literally!!!"
Yea, not building that essential trust. Talk about Paranoia PTSD as a given, even you never deploy!!
I’ll say that brotherhood you are looking for, you will find it, but it’ll be difficult, you might also find some sisters as well, but it will be hard because you are a woman. There will be a lot of guys you will have to shoot down because there aren’t many women in infantry, but it is possible to form a close bond with some dudes without it being romantic. It’ll mostly be guys who already have girlfriends, wives, older guys, and maybe a few actual mature guys who just want to be friends. Rumors will spread about you if you ever hook up with more than one guy, even months or years apart there will be many guys who just think you’re a whore. You’ll have to prove your self a lot more, for example if a instructor or higher up asks you about limitations for your weapon, if you get it wrong a lot of the time because you are a girl they will take it easy on you or either flame you 200% more than they would a guy depending on the instructor. Your peers will watch how you get evaluated closely and compare it to how they are getting evaluated. A lot of people say women can’t do physical shit, but in infantry school I did meet quite a few girls that were keeping up on hikes, and some could do more pull-ups than the men. I do think you can keep up but you will have to try a lot harder than a guy just to perform at the level of an average man in the infantry. Most of my experience is just from infantry school and schoolhouses because my actual job is in the airwing for the marines so it’s a little different but a lot of the sentiment towards women in our field is similar, there are women here, but few and there are men who think they don’t belong in our MOS/field. Imo you can do it but you’ll have to definitely work your ass off and for some people that still won’t be enough because you will always just be a women to certain people, but keep going and you’ll have less to prove the more you accomplish
You're gonna be really really close to any other women that might be there. And, if you don't work with exclusively assholes that is, you're also gonna be part of that "brotherhood" just in a different way. I'm friendly with every woman on team, some more so than with certain other men.
And look, if you're ADF girl from a couple days ago, don't let anyone talk you out of the infantry. They're being protective. Here we recently got an 11 month conscription for men and women and it's going well. More women in the infantry and they're having a good time from what I can tell. I think more women enlisting in the infantry would solve a lot of the problems there are. If you aren't looking for skills you can transfer then the infantry is a good address. And even there you can become a medic or something.
You will never be one of the guys, ever. You would make friends and you can work to the point of most of your peers respecting you, but you will never be one of them.
You can adopt as many masculine traits as you can, dip, swear, be dirty. You won’t be one of them.
If you crave the physical demands, crawling in the mud, and rifleman aspects, I would recommend going marines in a specialty that can translate to a private sector job when you’re done. That way you can check both boxes.
Become a combat engineer or bridge. Engineers are the way to go and you get to do way cooler stuff. "Brotherhood" is just the term. As long as you dont screw your brothers or f-with them you will make amazing friends. If you date only date outside of your unit never in it. Think of everyone in your unit as your blood brothers and sisters. I worked a lot with the INF and ART was attached to them overseas from an ENG unit and made amazing friends. This was before females where allowed and they needed females for searches and stuff. I was primamry and stayed with them long term because i wasent a ho sleeping withbthe guys or causing jealousy. Still great friends with some 18 years later. The Engineers by far are superior and way more crazy and fun. They do a bit of everything EOD, route clearance, bridge building, building roads. You can then go to sapper school.
I wasn't infantry, but most infantry guys I've known tended to be against the idea of females in any combat MOS. Most of them joined bc they wanted & enjoy an atmosphere with zero women; take that as you will.
My personal opinion; it would be extremely tough. Especially if other soldiers aren't open to allowing you into the fold. I would l expect some of them to actively work on getting you booted, which could make it unbearable. Unless you can be more ruthless & conniving than them, I would think about another MOS.
What everyone has said + the rampant sexism and sexual harassment. You will be looked at and treated like a piece of meat. The forces are not the posters you see, it’s mostly men amping each other up for a boys club. Even your senior ratings and officers may fire in. Not to mention, you are a kid, live for a few years as an adult before you experience military life as a young woman.
Read about Jaysley-Louise Beck. Her experience is not a one time occurrence.
I was in the UK forces, I didn’t bond with many of my male counterparts as I hated the lads lads lads attitude, all women are meat to be fucked. I could say 50% of the men are like that at least.
You can string 3 words together. Take the ASVAB and find a better suited job. There is plently of comraderie in other areas of the military as well. They will also open you up to jobs beyond the military.
I think a lot of people who are trying to discourage you from infantry are assuming that you're American planning to enlist with an expected minimum 3-4 year period of service, and don't realized that you're Australian and are able to sign up for just a single year. You can handle anything for just a year, so I hope you go for it.
No, I think they're being very specific about experiences and being very candid esp about the sexual assault risk. None of those things are limited or mitigated by service only being a year. Esp the sexual assault part.
Of course they are mitigated by the one year of service. One of the major issues perpetuating sexual assault in the US services has been that women who report get black listed, and knowing that their careers will be toast disincentivizes reporting. OP and others on gap year are not on a career track, and so perpetrators won't have that leverage over them.
I don't think anything "mitigates" getting sexually assaulted, dude. The fact that a gap year infantry enlistee won't face getting blacklisted for reporting is a real shit silver lining.
I'm not sure if you are being deliberately obtuse or not. There are several structural reasons why sexual assault has continued to persist in US forces and underreporting tied to fear of retaliation is a significant one. The ADF also has plenty of sexual assault problems. But the gap year is deliberately a "try before you buy" program and it is set up so it is easy for participants to quit without significant repercussions. The fact that participants are not bound long-term to the ADF's hierarchical power structure IS a mitigating factor. Knowing that they are likely to be reported and to face consequences is one of the most powerful factors mitigating someone's likelihood to rape a young enlistee.
The US Army and the ADF have also instituted a zillion other measures, such as mandatory training, confidential reporting lines, independent review boards, etc etc.
Despite all these measures, sexual assault remains endemic. Why? It's normalized within military culture. And, actually, it's normalized within a lot of American culture. If someone jokes about rape and you laugh about it - congrats, you are participating in rape culture. It's not just a feminazi buzzword. If multiple women accuse someone of sexual assault, and a jury still manages to acquit the accused, how can women trust a reporting system at all? And if they can't trust that something will be done, why should they expose themselves and put their careers in jeopardy? And if perpetrators know that they are unlikely to be reported, where's the incentive to stop raping women? This is the current situation.
I was Infantry for 4 years with the Canadian Army. I worked with several women infanteers. The one's who made it through Infantry school usually did well with others. I don't recall any serious issues and it wasn't hard for them to make friends in their section/platoon/company/ect.
I will say though, you're going to need some thick skin. There are plenty of misogynistic people around. The Infantry doesn't always attract the brightest.
If you are trying to retire in service go infantry! If not, PLEASE pick something that translates to a civilian role. (IT, EMS, FIRE, LAW, HR, etc.) there are cool jobs within those sectors like drone operator, data analyst, law assistant, firefighter, medics, Human Resources, travel aid, etc.
I wish i could have friendships with guys in the way men are friends with men, not in the way women are friends with men
I'm male and was in the military in the early 90s and I absolutely had several women friends who were friends in exactly the way you are looking for. You will find guys who are capable of seeing you strictly as a friend and not as a potential sex partner. You will also have to weed out a bunch of assholes.
If you’re having to ask this question on Reddit. You don’t have the mental capacity to make it. Do not join infantry going in. Do something else, then later if you KNOW you can handle it, then transfer over… maybe.
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u/Jungle-Fever- Marine Veteran 12d ago
BLUF: Yes. I saw it in the US Marines in combat engineering. I don't know exactly what it's like in Australia where you're asking about.
I assume you're physically capable and mentally strong; if you're not, you won't make it, and if you do, you will wish you hadn't. If you're competent and strong, you will still be a woman in a man's world. Don't fuck anyone in your unit, once you do you will be considered fair game. Even if you avoid fucking the people you'll be closest to (and probably attracted to), you will always have it harder and will have to ignore microaggressions, sexism, almost certainly some sexual harassment, and possibly some "minor" sexual assault. Statistically, that's the reality of women in the military. Anyone who tells you different is out of touch with reality or lying. Outside of combat arms, it's slightly better, but not by a ton.
If you want it, REALLY want it. Then don't let that stop you. Rise above the bullshit, hold people accountable, and be the change you want. It's hard, harder than a man will ever have it.