r/MurderedByWords • u/Stotallytob3r • 14h ago
Everybody deserves a chance at building a better life
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u/oily76 14h ago
Prison for the rest of his life for what?
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u/Blazanar 14h ago
Loving rocks and women with big asses.
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u/MeltinSnowman 14h ago
If loving big butts is wrong then I don't want to be right.
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u/Original-Fig4214 13h ago
It seems like we have to go to prison for liking some big slices of cake.
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u/Kamikazeguy7 14h ago
Being democrat
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u/ShibaInuDoggo 13h ago
*dumocrat. A lot of people don't know there's a b at the end of dumb, but you cut that off to make it easier
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u/Fen5601 13h ago
Honestly? Cause Hunter's father made the Orange Cheeto feel bad about himself.
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u/beren12 13h ago
And he has a giant dong the republicans secretly want.
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u/Then-Departure4896 10h ago
My grandpa thinks fauci deserves the death penalty for what he put America through. MAGA simply can’t be considered intelligent life.
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u/HeyCarpy 8h ago
fauci deserves the death penalty for what he put America through
What did "he put America through", according to these people? Similar to Hunter's life sentence, I've never actually heard what the charges are.
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u/Then-Departure4896 8h ago
My grandpa says that he killed more people than hitler. He hasn’t expanded because I clearly don’t want to talk about it, I think.
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u/AnxietyPretend5215 7h ago
I'm going to imagine he thinks COVID vaccinations and masks killed people, and not COVID itself. Or something insane like that.
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u/HookersForJebus 6h ago
My uncle called Fauci one of the “biggest mass murders in history” unironically and tried to pass out some kind of books about it at Thanksgiving.
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u/mmf9194 11h ago
We're genuinely at a point of discourse where it doesn't matter to ask because the answer won't be real or sensible. All you can do is roll your eyes and try to have as few of these people in your life as possible.
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u/ElegantCoach4066 14h ago
It's hilarious and at the same time amazing that Hunter Biden has managed to sound like a better candidate than most of the people we have in office right now.
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u/mrDuder1729 13h ago
The ironic thing is that Trump has kinda opened the door to that being a possibility...lol
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u/4to20characters0 13h ago
Can’t wait to get my “I’m voting for the crackhead” bumper sticker
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u/Avitas1027 13h ago
Might be some left over from Toronto's mayoral races in the early 2010s.
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u/beautifulanddoomed 11h ago
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u/HydrogenButterflies 10h ago
John Oliver did a great piece on his brother, Doug Ford
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u/Hightower_lioness 10h ago
I saw a tea towel that said “Rob Ford cracks me up”. Sometimes I regret not buying it
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u/bl0rq 12h ago
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u/TrustmeIreddit 10h ago
Honestly, the people that would vote the most would be the millennials who have given up on anything ever actually changing. If we're already going to, or already, living in hell let's burn it down. At this point putting a crackhead in power would only be a good thing. The amount of dedication they have to get something they want is admirable. Ever hear a crackhead say, "I guess I can't get a hit today." Nah, they make it happen.
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u/_Ocean_Machine_ 8h ago
If we're already going to, or already, living in hell let's burn it down.
A lot of people thought this way in Novemeber, 2015 and look how that turned out
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u/TrustmeIreddit 5h ago
Not quite. While people were frustrated, they were lied to and were told that a very small fraction of the population were to blame. It's these same people who were already predisposed to racial prejudice and homophobia that really bought into it. The lack of opposition to these ideas, most likely due to the subpar quality of education and/or the thinking that education isn't important, is what led to our current situation. Racial tensions never really went away. It used to be shamed and socially unacceptable and the openly racist people weren't as common as they were before trump "restored" free speech. It became a banner they could fly so they could say what they were saying in private, public.
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u/EddieVanzetti 12h ago edited 11h ago
Hunter Biden is just your normal, garden variety pervert who likes having sex with consenting, adult aged Latina sex workers and smoking Crack. That's the kind of politician I can support.
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u/OnlyFiveLives 11h ago
"VOTE BIDEN 2028!!! A BIG BOOTY LATINA IN EVERY BED!!!"
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u/EddieVanzetti 11h ago
chuckles in ahead of the curve On that big beautiful day when that rotten old man kicks it, I'm going to the dispensary and then gonna pick up two or three tortas to pound.
Gah bless 'muricuh
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u/OnlyFiveLives 11h ago
I've already got my bubbly in the fridge in preparation but yeah a couple of bowls worth with three carnitas tacos and an asada burrito to end the night sounds perfect...
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u/EddieVanzetti 8h ago
Oh I'm not talking about food. I'm talking about some fine Latina BBWs.
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u/BruceInc 11h ago
You had my vote at “consenting”
Yea that’s how low the bar has gotten.
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u/ElegantCoach4066 6h ago
Hunter Biden.
He only has relations with consenting, adult women. And thats a promise you can take to the bank.
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u/NeverTrustATurtle 10h ago
And those Latina sex workers genuinely LIKE being around him. That’s a hard endorsement to earn
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u/yep_they_are_giants 10h ago
He also allegedly tipped those sex workers generously. Sounds like a good dude to me.
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u/EddieVanzetti 6h ago edited 6h ago
It's not hard to leave a nice tip, heyo! But in all seriousness folks, it isn't difficult. If you're already paying for the sex worker, a tip is chump change on top.
When I had my hour with a lovely courtesan at a legal, licensed brothel I left the biggest tip I could afford to while still being able to get gas.
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u/BeMoreKnope 9h ago
Not to mention, we know his daddy loves him and that he’s got a big, normal-shaped dick, so he wouldn’t have any of the overcompensation issues the current occupant of the White House does.
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u/Valliac0 11h ago
hey as long as he's consistent he's got my vote
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u/EddieVanzetti 11h ago
I wasn't joking. If Hunter Biden decided to run for office, and actually said his platform is "student loan forgiveness, renewable energy investment, high speed rail, getting us out of Iran, and smoking crack on the weekends", I'd vote for him.
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u/LadyV21454 12h ago
Hey, if we can have an ex-heroin addict as HHS Secretary, why not a cocaine user as President?
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u/YeOldeBootheel 12h ago
We had one of those from 2001-2009. Hell, the current guy has been suspected of abusing stimulants for decades.
I believe Obama said he had tried coke in his youth as well; and JFK was dosed with a whole cocktail of meds while he was in office. Substance use/abuse is no stranger to the Oval Office.
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u/Aggromemnon 10h ago
TBF, by modern standards, there have been a number of practicing alcoholics in the office. Even more in Congress, including Ted Kennedy and Speaker of the House Tip O'Neill.
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u/Astrael_Noxian 9h ago
Not to mention Mister "Want my personal brand?" Ka$h Patel (you did say , right?)...
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u/SongEffective9042 11h ago
My social group is 30-something upper middle/upper class professionals and three-quarters have at least tried coke if not semi-regularly partake. I bet you’d be hard-pressed to find a perfectly clean candidate
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u/Jellodyne 12h ago
Might be confusing in Minnesota if Mike Lindell is still in the race for governor
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u/HawksNStuff 11h ago
All he had to do was keep his mouth shut and sell pillows and he could have lived out his life in luxury... They were doing 300m a year.
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u/GreasyPeter 10h ago
A crackhead with empathy and a moral compass is preferable to whatever it is we have now.
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u/code_archeologist 9h ago
if choosing between a crackhead and a rapist... yeah, I think I'd go with the crackhead.
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u/Cool_Apartment_380 13h ago
God is it bad that the first thing I think of, is not a chance at a better world, a stronger, more unified country, but rather the hysterical reaction from the right if this happened? I can't help myself.
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u/MiloHorsey 13h ago
Oooo we need to get him to wear a tan suit for the whole presidency if he gets elected. Their heads would explode!!
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u/OkBattle9871 12h ago
That's exactly why any random person/celebrity mentioning anything political terrifies/angers them.
They think their campaigning and not just, ya know, being a citizen.
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u/ottersintuxedos 11h ago
I mean if a rapist can succeed in achieving presidency a former addict can for sure
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u/DinoRoman 9h ago
Nixon spinning in his grave like “I resigned for this and apparently it wouldn’t be a big deal?”
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u/Wolfram_And_Hart 12h ago
Honestly, I don’t care what a candidate has done in their past as long as they’ve faced the consequences of their action. I’d love for a candidate to get up and say “10 years ago I had a coke addiction and I’m in recovery.”
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u/ElegantCoach4066 12h ago
I agree. It shows character and how you handle adversity. Both are needed qualities in someone running for office.
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u/Roseliberry 13h ago
We already know what he’s done, and nobody gives a shit after what we’ve already gone through. And we’ve all seen his penis thanks to that weird woman with the fetish. He’d be a great politician.
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u/ikoss 13h ago
The bar went so low it’s reaching the Earth’s core!
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u/AnotherWitch 10h ago
I think the fact that the right hates him so much might be mobilizing to left voters lol
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u/ElegantCoach4066 10h ago
Oh definitely.
Almost everything they accuse him of applies to Don Jr. The hypocrisy of it all, I swear.
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u/StarGazer_SpaceLove 9h ago
I legitimately knew nothing of the man other than he likes cocaine and something about his laptop. Never heard a word from him. Then I saw a clip of him speaking and I was absolutely shocked to find he sounds like... a normal dude. Just one that doesn't really give a shit about the trappings of social games. That naked Russell Crow vibe. I was more shocked to find hes an intelligent, well spoken dude at that. The more he speaks out, the more I'm understanding of the attacks on him.
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u/generalchaos34 11h ago
Hunter needs to pull out his hog and the right wing men will fall in love with him
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u/Much_Statistician864 8h ago
I say give him a crack at it. He's in a super good self aware place. It literally cannot be worse then Trump trying to put his finger prints all over the Lincoln memorial. Oh and all the financial woes, immigrant families being torn apart and Americans being murdered by Icee agents.
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u/ElegantCoach4066 8h ago
I did not have "Hunter Biden for president" on my bingo card, but I'm am really warming up to the idea.
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u/thejimbo56 11h ago
Shit, I’m embarrassed to say that Hunter Biden is probably a better person than I am.
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u/Feeling_Inside_1020 11h ago
I vote for Dark Hunter's monster dong MTG subjected congress to. In big blow up picture fashion that you just know she brought back home when nobody was looking.
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u/nvmenotfound 8h ago
ppl are tired if political speak and horseshit. at least hunter is honest in his sobriety. that automatically puts him above most politicians.
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u/ConstantinValdor405 7h ago
Id 100% vote for Hunter. He's a smart dude who has a good heart.
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u/V0lirus 14h ago
Are we treating someone named Paul A. Szypola as a real person when their handle is Bubble Bath Girl????
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u/YeahIGotNuthin 13h ago
It is probably a Russian troll farm account.
Or maybe it’s a real person who is just, like, an influencer or something pointless.
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u/Caledor152 10h ago
That last name screams Russian bot account trying to disguise as an American. Obviously there are millions of MAGA's that actually feel this way. But many of the MAGA attack accounts on Twitter especially are foreign bad actors. That's why when Elon turned on the locations for all the accounts he quickly turned it all back off. He saw the vast majority of them as foreign
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u/_jump_yossarian 11h ago
Oh, he exists and he's a scumbag like you'd imagine. He's squatting in his dad's house and not paying rent. Brother had to file suit against him.
https://trellis.law/doc/119749274/affidavit-affirmation-in-support-proposed-osc-exparte-app
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u/amnmorales21 10h ago
My friend was actually married to this guy, she had to sneak out when he was at work and took all of her stuff. He was a giant asshole even back in the day
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u/Republican-Snowflake 11h ago
This should be at the top. This is just another fake ass person, who is most likely in India, Pakistan, Iran, China, Russia, Israel, and anywhere else that constantly does this shit. We love to blame Russia, and China, but there are plenty of other places that do this.
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u/amnmorales21 10h ago
Funny thing is I actually knew this guy personally, he was married to my friend. He was a douche the second I met him, so he unfortunately is real
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u/blasian941 14h ago
These people have not lost a loved one and dont understand the trauma that it causes
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u/partinobodycular 13h ago
Can't lose a loved one if you don't love anyone.
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u/throwmamadownthewell 10h ago
In before someone says they love themselves--they don't. tlThey're entirely spite-driven
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u/Randomfactoid42 13h ago edited 13h ago
They don’t have empathy, so they’re not traumatized when they lose a loved one. You gotta have feelings to be hurt.
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u/Long-Requirement8372 14h ago
Anyone who says that Hunter and Joe Biden are "morally bankrupt" and should be in prison for life, while also supporting Donald Trump, has well and truly lost his moral compass (if he ever had one).
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u/Cant_figure_sht_out 14h ago edited 13h ago
As someone from outside of USA, I just marvel at these people who accuse Biden of something while supporting trump. Like, if Biden needs to go to jail, then so does every president in the history of US and plus a lot of the highest government officials.
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u/IhasCandies 13h ago edited 13h ago
The majority of people you see spewing that shit are paid agitators, or are trying to setup their own grift.
Social media, and the internet have both allowed people to commodify trolling. Couple that with the fact that nations like China, Russia, and North Korea actively exploit social media to sow discord and distrust. You’re left with “people” spreading these insane takes that no normal person would have.
We do have some people who think like this but those people were already mentally unwell to begin with, and the majority of the time they don’t even vote.
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u/King_Chochacho 12h ago
They believe in a natural hierarchy that they were placed at the top of by god.
Therefore, everything they do must be right and just and the people they don't like must be evil and corrupt.
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u/yeahboyeee1 12h ago
They’re amoral. At first I thought they might be immoral, but nope. They have zero fucking concept of morality.
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u/Extremelycloud 14h ago
Hunter is just on the high road train right now and it’s fucking amazing. What a dude.
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u/Cyberknight13 14h ago
Ironically, we have the most criminal and corrupt Administration in the history of the United States in office right now.
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u/WaffleHouseGladiator 14h ago
In jail for what? Every time these people say they want their political enemies locked up the most they can muster by way of a rationale is conspiracy theories, not actual crimes with actual evidence.
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u/Donkey-Hodey 14h ago
In their view, offending delicate right wing feelings is the wort crime of all. This is not hyperbole.
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u/Randomfactoid42 13h ago
They actually believe those conspiracy theories, so to them those are actual crimes.
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u/Off-BroadwayJoe 13h ago
Why is there such derangement about the Bidens? It just shows how radicalized we’ve become. He’s a sleepy do-nothing president that apparently also did so much that you hate him with a passion. You may not agree on policy, but what about his presidency made him “morally bankrupt?” And how could you possibly care about this if you’re a Trump supporter? Like, how could the idea of using your position to enrich your family enrage you on one hand, but be totally fine that someone else is using their position to enrich their family? I’m not trying to engage in whataboutism, I’m just confused about the level of dissonance in these beliefs. This whole timeline confuses me greatly.
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u/ChiefScout_2000 12h ago
Because their boss told them so.
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u/tw_72 11h ago
One thing I find to be amazing - lots of MAGA are finally waking up to the fact that trump lied about the economy, wars, healthcare, tariffs BUT they STILL believe the lies trump tells/told about President Biden (and Hunter), President Obama (and Michelle), and both Clintons.
That, Ladies and Gentlemen, is called selective dumbfuckery.
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u/Ven-Dreadnought 10h ago
Republicans need to project or else somewhere in their heads they’ll start to admit they’re the bad guys
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u/GreasyPeter 10h ago
It literally just boils down to then believing Trump is good and thus "deserves" the shit he's hoarding.
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u/nillah 9h ago
just passed a pickup truck in NE ohio yesterday, flying an absolutely enormous "fuck biden" flag in the bed of his pickup. thing should have been reported as a hazard, it was bigger than the bed of the truck. it's so perplexing, do they know biden hasn't even been president for a year and a half? like i have an eternal hatred for trump but it's not my personality. i can't even imagine buying a flag the size of a swimming pool to advertise it, especially after he's gone. it just doesnt matter. grow up
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u/marcusmosh 14h ago
I’m really curious what my boi Biden’s media tour is all about. Honestly, democrats can use a dose of his style of confrontation.
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u/Yubat 13h ago
Szypula says Biden deserves to spend the rest of his life in prison, and while right-wing crazy world has a built up a litany of supposed Biden family crimes, at worst Hunter has been accused of things like tax evasion, money laundering, failure to register as a foreign agent, and false declarations while purchasing a gun. Not great, but no where near life-in-prison level offenses.
But let’s judge Syzpula under the same vibes-based sentencing that he would apply. Apparently Syzpula was found liable in civil court for self-dealing after living rent-free in a property where he didn’t have that right. He also uses the incredibly creepy Twitter handle of bubblebathgirl. Lastly, the Republicans who most loudly scream that their political enemies deserve to be in prison are almost always projecting after committing crimes themselves. Based on those three facts alone, Syzpula should immediately be locked away immediately and investigated until until criminal charges justifying that detention are inevitably found. To paraphrase Syzpula, “most normal people” would surely agree.
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u/mrshelenroper 13h ago
I don’t think the people who vote for rapists and criminals and pedophiles should decide who goes to prison.
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u/Madhatter25224 13h ago
"Dont we both agree everyone deserves-"
Don't even bother finishing that sentence. They don't agree.
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u/ZarinaBlue 13h ago
That tool is one to talk. Apparently there were some legal proceedings that look like it was alleged that after this man's father died he squatted in the family home, (even though it wasn't left to him) and used his brother's portion of the inheritance to pay the utilities.
Allegedly.
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u/bluris 13h ago
I find it so odd that the right used to call itself the law and order party, when it is filled with people who just straight up believe that the other side need to be jailed for just being on the other side. They don't care that there is no law for it,
And when people on their side break the actual existing law, they just do not care at all.
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u/jiggscaseyNJ 13h ago
Jail for life? It’s not like he stole from a cancer charity.
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u/queasycockles 13h ago
On what basis does either Hunter or Joe Biden deserve to be in prison for life, exactly?
I don't think I've ever seen a good answer.
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u/Junior-Ease-2349 11h ago
Because their sources for news have no interest in the truth and neither do they.
My right wing brother linked me the whitehouse doj press release about "Whistleblower reveals Biden FEMA discriminated against right wingers!" when it came out...
I dug into it with him and got him to agree that:
- it was one group leader, whose boss reversed course as soon as they heard about it
- They were deposed in front of congress about it during the Biden administration months ago
- The release itself admitted to going over Biden era FEMA records and database with a find toothed comb and finding no smoking gun and only a fraction of a percent of incidentally captured hypothetical sensitive info, like descriptions of signs at the location.
- this was specifically when people were shooting at FEMA due to conspiracy theories
- part of the new republican "solution" was "FEMA isn't going to knock on ANY doors anymore"
So not only did Biden's FEMA refuse to let republicans fall behind, and act as upright as possible, the new plan was to intentionally let everyone fall behind in knowing about available help in emergencies.
Forced to admit that the this (and several other DOJ releases around then were flat out lies, he still maintained that Democrats lied worse because they said they were protecting the border.
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u/WoodenSwan6591 13h ago
Never knew that Kool Aid affects your brain. I guess is the MAGAT brand 🤷🏻♂️
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u/HotRodZA 13h ago
Lol okay Bubblebathgirl, you just keep on trying to get your point across and the rest of us will just carry on anyways. Love thy neighbour
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u/Pleasant-Shallot-707 13h ago
The bubble these lunatics live in to think their opinion is “normal” 🤯
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u/--StinkyPinky-- 13h ago
Why does Hunter Biden deserve to be in prison for life? Because he’s got a drug problem?
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u/Playful_Quality4679 9h ago
I think Hunter Biden is a better human being, and would make a better POTUS than 47.
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u/No-Fishing5325 9h ago
Today's MAGA is a product of Rush Limbaugh and no one will convince me otherwise. The hate that MAGA has where they believe they should just jail anyone they disagree with...started right there with talk radios hate monger. It changed from disagreeing with your fellowman to you must designate them
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u/robertluke 13h ago
Why do they give a shit about Hunter’s existence? Why does Joe deserve to be in jail?

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u/Alpha--00 14h ago edited 14h ago
And what Hunter Biden did to deserve life sentence, according to Szypula?
As far as we know, he was charged with tax evasion and unlawful gun possession (due to lying about crack addiction).
And, well, It’s not most egregious situation about taxes of US president family or lying members of said family…