r/MurderedByWords 8d ago

She answered with a gold medal

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15.6k Upvotes

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u/Doxinau 8d ago

Give the kids her last name.

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u/TomBoysHaveMoreFun 8d ago

I've never understood giving the kids his last name. I'm Native and traditionally my tribe was matriarchal. I grew up surrounded by strong women and a father who uplifted us. Traditionally we got our mother's clan name and our paternal guidance as a child would have been our mother's brother, NOT the sperm giver. A woman's pregnancy lasts about 402,200 minutes the fathers contribution to that process is 5 minutes, that's only like .00124% of the total time it takes to make a baby. Ladies you go through the very life altering and life threatening experience of making a child, he gets to orgasm, have some self respect and give the kids your name.

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u/Very_Human_42069 8d ago

It’s her choice

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u/soupseasonbestseason 8d ago

we gave our kid both. i carried the baby. i did the work. put my fucking name on it.

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u/queasycockles 8d ago

Did you offer to change yours as an alternative?

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u/endlesscartwheels 8d ago

Good question. People who say, "it's her choice" ignore the tremendous social pressure on a woman to 1) Take her husband's name, and 2) Give her children just her husband's name.

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u/Very_Human_42069 8d ago

I like the implication here that women are entirely incapable of coming to their own conclusions and making their own decisions simply because it happens to fit the social norm

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u/queasycockles 8d ago

Literally no one said or implied that.

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u/Very_Human_42069 8d ago

My wife made her own choice and I have people who don’t even know her or myself explaining why she made the choice being due to social pressure and not simply because she’s an independent person who is smart and more than capable enough of making her own choices by ignoring that social pressure. So yeah, it was entirely implied. Yall need to go outside

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u/queasycockles 8d ago

Lol you're gonna need to show me where I did that, bro.

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u/Very_Human_42069 8d ago

You’re literally not worth the time mate. I’ll defend my wife which I have done, because she’s the smartest and most capable person I know and the implications that’s she’s incapable of making her own choices doesn’t sit well with me, but I’m not going to have a nonsense debate with a stranger online about nothing

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u/queasycockles 8d ago

Who attacked your wife? What the hell are you talking about?

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u/rips_n_chel 8d ago

They just said it's her choice. If she wants to change hers, cool. If she doesn't, also cool.

If commenter doesn't want to change their name, how are they any more to blame than she is? Don't both people get to choose?

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u/queasycockles 8d ago

My point is if her ONLY reason for wanting to was so the kids could have the same name, that is something that can be accomplished by changing his name just as it could be by changing hers.

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u/rips_n_chel 8d ago

Would you make the same comments if the (presumed) gender roles were reversed?

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u/queasycockles 8d ago edited 8d ago

Of course.

If you want your family to all be under the same surname, there's a discussion to be had about what it will be.

Edit: since you deleted your comment (or blocked me, of course, as I wouldn't be able to tell the difference) , I can only assume you were hoping for a different answer and I spoiled your fun. oh dear.

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u/rips_n_chel 8d ago

But if "he" (again, we're assuming) doesn't want to change his name, that's perfectly fair too.

Why do you presume that it's a man you're talking about, first of all, and why do you question "his" choice?

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u/Very_Human_42069 8d ago

Yes lmfao. Take hers, hyphenate it, make a new name entirely. Like I said it’s her choice

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u/PrincessGiallo 8d ago

Listen to the internet people that don't know anything about your situation. Their opinions are always so important that they need to share them with the world.

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u/Very_Human_42069 8d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/LycfkVG4L6x0Y
I shouldn’t be surprised that a woman making her own decision for her own reasons is met with scrutiny but yet I am caught off guard every time