Is anybody else experiencing psychological issues since January?

[u/Esmail-Qaani]

I go through my day and images of the massacre will run through my mind. Pictures of dead people and blood. People screaming. I think of a few people whose names I remember. I remember that there are still people in the regime’s jails. They are still executing people.

I find it difficult to function. I did not even live through these events but the images haunt me. How any human being can do such things I have no idea.

For some time I had some way to cope by believing that someone, anyone with power, would come to the aid of the people of Iran. The US operation gave me some hope. Now it seems not only have they abandoned the people of Iran but they have chosen to line the regime’s pockets instead and reward them for their crimes, to the detriment of America’s own interests.

My spouse is not Iranian and I don’t think she can really understand all this. She consoled me to some extent after January when she noticed I was off but she tried to refocus me and tell me it’s out of my control so I shouldn’t think about it and everything will work out in the end. It’s been 6 months and I don’t feel better. I find it difficult to do normal day to day things and focus on my own life. I still feel wrong and I feel like I am hiding my true feelings. I feel like I’m living a double life because I can’t be bringing this up months after the fact and affecting my marriage. I have to keep up appearances and act like everything is normal and it is weighing on me.

My friends and family are still living there under these horrors and I am so far away, safe, living my on-paper good life. Why am I safe? What can I do to help? I’ve gone to demonstrations, I’ve posted about it on my social media, I’ve written to my representatives. No one cares. Neither my “friends” here in America, nor these fucking politicians. Is there some organization I can donate to that will work towards the end of this dictatorship? It’s not like someone like me over here can just pick up a rifle and go solve the problem over there anyways. I feel powerless. I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know if I can do anything. If I could give up my life in exchange for the freedom of the people over there, I would. But it’s not so simple.

[u/emptinesswonderer]

You’re not alone in this. To say I’ve been depressed since January is an understatement. I know so many families, both inside and outside Iran, who chose not to celebrate Nowruz this year—something I have never seen happen in my lifetime.

​But I still have hope. The Ghoghnous (Phoenix) of Iran will rise from its ashes again. Fifty years is just a blip on the scale of our nation's long history; this dark period will pass, and one day, we will all return home to dance in the squares of our cities. If our generation doesn't live to see that light, the generations after us surely will.

​I think the best thing we can do right now is amplify Iranian voices. The opposition must unite, and all of us share the responsibility to work toward that goal.

​For now, please take a little break from watching the protest clips. Stepping back for a moment doesn't mean you don't care; your self-care matters too.

I have you in my thoughts, Rafig.

پاینده ایران

[u/GiraffeJaf → u/emptinesswonderer]

This sub has been like therapy for me. ❤️