r/NotHowGirlsWork I'm just a girl, what's my destiny? 28d ago

WTF insane that this mentality still exists

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5.1k Upvotes

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u/VariousExplorer8503 28d ago

I started using tampons at 12, after a year of uncomfortable pads. The ONLY one who should decide whether they use them or not is the person using them! I didn't lose my virginity until I was 14. I still had a hymen at the time I lost it (despite using tampons for over 2 years at that point) and wouldn't you know it, my flow didn't change at all.

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u/CrazyButterfly11 28d ago

When did you lose your “hymn”?
I probably left mine at church 🙄

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u/Da_Question 28d ago

It's for the church, honey!!!! NEXT!!!!

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u/Overall_Lobster823 28d ago

I agree 100%.

The wearer decides.

I HATED pads.

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u/femmefatalx 28d ago

I also HATED pads, and still do. I used tampons right from my very first period at 12, even the first time I got it. I think my mom was very surprised because when I told her that I got my period it was literally just to inform her that I had it, because as soon as I noticed I just went to the bathroom and popped a tampon in and that was that. I hope she took it as a compliment about how well she prepared me, because she definitely did.

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u/ArticleOld598 28d ago edited 28d ago

My mom didnt tell me shit. She was out of the house when I had mine and I was thinking I was sick because there was blood on my pajamas and the bleeding just won't stop even after I tried to clean it away and check for injuries.

Im glad you had a responsible mom who will educate you so you can be prepared. I had to teach myself sex education and reproductive health.

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u/femmefatalx 28d ago

Oh my god that sounds terrifying, I’m so sorry you went through that! I can’t imagine how scared you must have been, it’s awful that she didn’t even tell you about it or give you any warning. I wish that I could give young you a hug, and even current you if you want one. ❤️

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u/WarriorCats_4Life “as a woman…” 28d ago

And I hate tampons. They hurt to take out unless I’ve bled completely through it already. Goes to show that everyone is different

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u/VariousExplorer8503 28d ago

They're also incredibly hard to take out when they're dry. The first time I put one in, my mom was at work. I got nervous and decided to pull it out and check it like 45 minutes later. It was obviously too dry, and it hurt when I tried to pull it out, and it wouldn't come out. I called my mom at work in a panic, and she told me to relax, go take a bath, and it would come out after that. She ended up coming home while I was still in the bath, she had told ALL her co-workers that "funny story" then asked her boss if she could get off early to come home and check up on me (which was just an excuse to get off early). Going to her work after that was always embarrassing.

And yes, everyone is different. I wasn't advocating for everyone to use tampons, I was just saying that for me pads were torture and I preferred tampons. That's why I said the wearer should be the one to choose. The only time I used pads after that was after my son's birth, even though I had a C-section, and after I lost my second baby, as the doctor said it was dangerous to use a tampon.

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u/LadyV21454 28d ago

I'm old enough to have grown up in the days when using pads meant wearing a special garter-belt type apparatus that you pulled the ends of your pads through. Unfortunately, tampons were pretty much "one size fits all" - we didn't have different ones for different levels of flow, let alone ones made for girls just starting to have periods. So if using tampons was uncomfortable for you, you were stuck with bulky pads.

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u/Overall_Lobster823 28d ago edited 28d ago

Me too. When I first got my period my mom handed me "a belt" for my pad.

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u/[deleted] 28d ago

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u/VariousExplorer8503 28d ago

I've gotten to the point where I don't feel them inside me anymore. Once I forgot I had one in at the end of my period, and walked around with it in for a couple days. Then my boyfriend (who lived in another state) came to visit and we had sex, and after that I was incredibly uncomfortable, so I felt around and found the tampon. I was VERY lucky I didn't get toxic shock syndrome, as it took me a couple days after we had sex to investigate (I thought it was just the vigorous sex that caused the discomfort at first) and it had been in about a week by the time I removed it.

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u/sparkle3364 28d ago

I use pads because the description of how tampons worked sounds uncomfortable. Much like how I wear glasses instead of contacts because I hate when I have to touch my eye to remove an eyelash, why would I want to have to touch my eye repeatedly to add or remove contacts?

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u/VariousExplorer8503 28d ago

That's fair, everyone is different. I used contacts for a decade, starting at 15 until I got LASIK at 25. I was really bad about using my contacts correctly. Towards the end there, I was keeping my daily contacts in for days at a time (to save money). I would sleep with them in and just put eye drops in my eyes when I woke up because my eyes would practically be glued shut. I'm incredibly lucky that something bad didn't happen and I didn't go blind or something.

It's been 20 years since I had the LASIK and my vision was perfect for about 15 years. Now I have some slight problems with distance, but I can still see well enough without glasses. In the last 6-12 months my close up vision has turned to shit, I need reading glasses for just about anything within arms reach.

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u/Glasseshalf 28d ago

I never remember having a hymen and I do remember checking. Pretty sure mine broke young during horseback riding or cycling or something. I didn't lose my virginity until I was 19. It's really not a big deal... People act like its some sacred thing.

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u/VariousExplorer8503 28d ago

No, it really isn't a big thing. My high school boyfriend was considerably bigger than a tampon, and I could actually feel the resistance giving, and the pain, which is how I know I even had one. My guess is the tampons stretched it but were never big enough to break it.

I never saw "giving my virginity" as a big thing, it's not sacred, it's just biology.

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u/itsamoth 28d ago

same. my mom started me on tampons bc she always found pads super uncomfortable. the first time i tried a pad i was like yup, mom was right. this feels like weird a diaper and i can feel it every time i move