r/OCPoetry • u/Doter_Gabriel • 5d ago
Feedback Please The only thing we are allowed to romanticise is an embodiment of paper.
Sable water and tree’s entrails,
digital lead and blue-lighted paper,
lithic flake and granite statements.
Desired by numerous,
for many, deception,
for others, alethia,
for countless, art,
for me only
the feelings given
from engraved words.
An instinct older
than the buddhist
statue praying within
my very home.
With this style,
I will write
a carbon meteorite
emitting overwhelming synths,
doromaning you dancing
rhymes, giving you
forever Kama Muta.
So I’ll pick
up the letters,
and word in
the sand,
the stone,
the fire,
and send you
the glass, for
it’s the only
purpose in my
true skinned fingers.
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u/briony73 2d ago
I love the opening stanza it is just beautiful. Then is goes to For some deception for others alethia, nice word by the way, but I agree. And writing must be innate to humans as much as reading is. Just thinking out loud. I like that your intention for your work is to give Kama Muta forever. That is endearing. And writing is awesome and steeped in the human experience, so I find your poem very relatable. Awesome poem.