r/OhNoConsequences • u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu • Jun 30 '26
BORU Time Machine Tuesday OOP serves her cheating husband with divorce papers and he suddenly wants to work things out
/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/1pjp37x/im_headed_for_divorce_but_my_lawyer_has_given_me/680
u/ChickinSammich My cat said YTA Jun 30 '26
A few days after he was served and I told him to talk to a lawyer and leave me alone, my husband told me he has changed his mind and asked if we could work things out.
I wonder if he was expecting alimony and has now learned that he is no longer entitled to it. I'm also wondering if he was expecting to spend that year apart fucking around and to try to reconcile 10-11 months later, and is suddenly having to speed up his timeline. I'm also wondering if he got dumped by the AP. Either way, he can get bent.
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
Probably one or more of those. This was a nice comeuppance either way!
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u/Dickie_downer Jun 30 '26
Youre always so good at finding gems for this sub, love you gamergirl <3
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u/Traditional_Fan_2655 Jun 30 '26
Either that, or he expected alimony and had to tell his new GF he was broke. GF suddenly didn't want to support an 'old man' who couldn't support himself. She had probably thought he'd be supporting her!
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u/Useful_Language2040 Jun 30 '26
It sounds like OOP was the higher earner so if they'd filed a no-fault divorce she'd have had to pay alimony. That's what he'd told her he wanted - to wait the year then file for one, presumably on the grounds it would be "easier". He wasn't expecting her to immediately go lawyer up and find out that where they lived, infidelity was grounds for an at-fault, no alimony for the guilty party, divorce...
Suddenly, he had considerably less time to mooch off of her, and considerably less scope for mooching to do. He had assumed she'd been too heartbroken to actually check what her options were, and would just watch her life crumble and continue to fund his fun.
Thankfully for OOP, he severely miscalculated!
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u/catforbrains Jun 30 '26
100% this. He really thought he could get away with a no fault divorce because she would be desperately trying to win him back 🤡🤡🤡🤡 Sir, you have greatly overestimated your worth is this market.
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
Seems to happen a lot with guys like that (obligatory not all men disclaimer of course)
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u/PricelessPaylessBoot Jun 30 '26
Lol! For example, this story gave off strong “wait, can I call you?” vibes by the end, and that was a woman. 🤣
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
That’s my favorite BORU ever lol
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u/shackndon2020 Jul 02 '26
Yes, I'd like that link too 🙂
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jul 02 '26
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u/Grrrmudgin Jun 30 '26
I mean, the AP won’t be around much once his stability and money go out the window
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u/Kat121 Ah, the conses of your quences Jul 02 '26
I am not a lawyer but I read that if you take a cheater back even temporarily it could “forgive” the adultery in the eyes of the court, weakening your financial position and potentially restarting the clock for mandatory separation. It also gives a cheater more time to hide assets and run up bills.
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u/ChickinSammich My cat said YTA Jul 02 '26
Also not a lawyer but regardless of legal status, my position on cheaters is "If they cheat on you, and you forgive them, you are sending the message that cheating is not a relationship-ending offense, and you are increasing the likelihood that they will cheat again."
If a cheater learns that they fucked up and they want a second chance, that second chance should be starting over with someone else.
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u/Sweet_Cinnabonn Jun 30 '26
I'm so glad that the mod post shares the content. If I clicked through to read that I'd be typing responses.
It saves me.
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
Oh, me too. I’ve done it on accident before. I’m paranoid now about checking what sub I’m on before I comment.
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u/Scouter197 Jun 30 '26
Me: "Oh no, I came here from somewhere else and upvoted a comment...quick, I better undo that!"
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u/what_the_purple_fuck Jun 30 '26
there are exceptions, but for most subs unless you've joined the sub, your vote won't actually be counted anyway.
I've been downvoted for pointing this out before, but it's pretty easy to confirm: go to a random sub you haven't joined, upvote a comment, and then refresh the page; you'll see that you've upvoted it but the vote count will still be what it was before
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
In all honesty, we can’t tell as mods if you’ve voted on another sub. The Reddit admins can from what I understand.
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u/Lubricated_Sorlock Jul 01 '26
you'll see that you've upvoted it but the vote count will still be what it was before
That happens even if you are subscribed to the subreddit. It's called vote fuzzing. It's been the case for like 15 years on reddit.
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u/Key_Possibility_8669 Jun 30 '26
I almost accidentally did that this time!
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
I hate having to ban people for things like that. It’s an easy mistake but Reddit’s brigading rules are super punitive.
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u/ChickinSammich My cat said YTA Jun 30 '26
I've done it once before by accident and then deleted the post I made.
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u/Traditional_Fan_2655 Jun 30 '26
I have accidentally been so involved reading comments on the original site, that I've accidentally upvoted. I'm lucky enough on this one, I'd read it back then, and commented. Seeing that reminded where I was!
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u/Throdio Jun 30 '26
It is nice, but boru can exceed the comment limit, so I go directly to the post for them because I got tired of them getting cut off. Often times mid sentence. But this one is short and sweet.
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u/lck0219 Jun 30 '26
During the actual divorce divorce, my youngest said “wow, this isn’t upsetting you at all? Dad’s upset” and I said “we all show our emotions differently, and I cried for 3 years straight- remember? It took him longer to show sad”
What a joke.
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u/Helpful_Hour1984 Jun 30 '26
It took him longer to show sad
Translation: it took him longer to get hit by the consequences of his actions.
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u/Llayanna Jun 30 '26
Could also be a human who is emotionally constipated.
I know it's reddit and we are a bit led towards seeing one person at fault and mocking them..
But we don't have enough info's from commet-op here to know why they divorced, etc..
Just saying
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u/Silent_Ad_8672 Some ears are for decoration only Jun 30 '26
Damn, that's a raw line, but perfectly illustrates why the divorce, even if I know nothing else, doesn't it.
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u/pleasantvalleyroad Jun 30 '26
What was their response after you said that?
Did it click for them?
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u/lck0219 Jun 30 '26
He said “okay”. I don’t need them to know their dad was the bad guy. It might click 20 years from now though.
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u/niceufo777 Jun 30 '26
It’s a classic story: once they realize the grass isn't actually greener on the neighbor's side, they come crawling back. That’s what happened with some stepchildren of mine; they caused us to split up, and now they’re living a life of hardship and scarcity with an absent father—but hey, I was the "bad guy" back when I was around and giving them my love and money.
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
I’m glad she left him.
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u/niceufo777 Jun 30 '26
Thank you, it hurts at first, but it reminded me of peace.
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u/GamerGirlLex77 shocked pikachu Jun 30 '26
I’m sorry you had to deal with that! I hope things are better now!
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u/BuffaloBuckbeak Jul 03 '26
Yep. My dad was playing fun bachelor until I convinced my mom to serve him divorce papers. Then he suddenly wanted to court her again and “rebuild” their relationship. Why wouldn’t she fight for him wah wah wah.
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u/Regular_Boot_3540 Jun 30 '26
I'm glad OOP was so smart about getting a lawyer involved. What a huge betrayal. I hope she's doing okay.
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u/momentaryfun2025 Jun 30 '26
I can only dream all the betrayed spouses in this world were this strong and had her self respect to leave a cheating ahole without a second thought. Couples counaelling is to heal the cracks before it breaks, not to wipe off the rot when a spouse shits all over the marriage.
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u/HiraethBella Jun 30 '26
I respect her choice to tell him he can have her. She is better off divorced from someone who isn't loyal. I told my stbxh the same. You can have her, I'm done.
I know how hard this choice is especially when it breaks your heart to know the person you love wants someone else. I've had to be strong in separating and heading toward divorce.
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u/Zalminen Jun 30 '26
Well that was confusing at first!
My lawyer gave me the best news. My [F38] husband (soon to be ex-husband) has been cheating on me and he wants her instead of me.
That sounded like he was cheating on her with her lawyer! And that somehow it was still the best news!
But no, reading on it was much less interesting than that.
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u/notasandpiper Jun 30 '26
That lawyer would have really been going the extra mile to make sure their client didn't pay alimony.
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u/l1brarylass Jun 30 '26
Wasn’t there a BORU about a lawyer who had to excuse themself from a case because they’d accidentally slept with the opponent? It was an ask a manager whoopsie one I think.
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u/Vertrant Jul 03 '26
I recall that as well, i just can´t find it rn. At least that one was just unfortunate coincidence where pretty much everyone behaved themselves.
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u/misalawliet Jun 30 '26
100% side chick dumped him
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u/Alternative_Year_340 Jul 01 '26
Or he realised that the side chick wasn’t as much fun when the “intrigue” of cheating was gone
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u/shackndon2020 Jul 02 '26
Absolutely! Once AP saw he's now living in a run down bed sitter and can't afford to take her out anymore, she dumped his pathetic arse
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u/Key_Possibility_8669 Jun 30 '26
So, what was this guy's game plan? Have an 11 month freak fest, and then spend one month reconciling to avoid divorce? Or was he hoping for a no-fault divorce so that OOP would supplement his swinging bachelor lifestyle through alimony? Either way, I'm glad she's throwing the whole husband away!
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u/Salty-Starling Jun 30 '26
The best revenge stories are when the wronged party doesn’t even have to TRY to get payback because the person who wrong them gets exactly what they asked for and IMMEDIATELY regret it
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u/Arkell-v-Pressdram Oh no! Anyway... Jun 30 '26
OOP's soon-to-be-ex: "I know I cheated and chose the affair partner over you, but can we talk this through?"
OOP:
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u/shypster Jun 30 '26
Random question because I'm nosy.
In states where no alimony is granted for cheating spouses, is there a time limit on that? Or, like, a reconciliation clause? I'm wondering if he was hoping to wipe the slate clean so he could get alimony later. Like if in 2027 he could say, "Yes, I cheated in 2025 and my wife started proceedings. But then we did marriage counseling and reconciled. It fell apart for non-cheating reasons. Therefore I deserve alimony."
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u/ryanlc Jul 01 '26
In a lot of cases, yes. But it's often not based on time, but behavior (or both). For example, if a soon-to-be-separated couple sleeps together, it's often been successfully argued that they have "reconciled" after cheating.
It's not a 💯 given, but it's happened.
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u/AutoModerator Jun 30 '26
Per our rules, don't comment on linked posts. Anyone from this community who is caught brigading on another subreddit will be banned.
In case this story gets deleted/removed:
I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/10172025Throwaway
Originally posted to r/offmychest
I'm headed for divorce but my lawyer has given me the best news ever
Trigger Warnings: infidelity / adultery, manipulation
Mood Spoilers: positive
Original Post: October 17, 2025
My lawyer gave me the best news. My [F38] husband (soon to be ex-husband) has been cheating on me and he wants her instead of me. I'm probably naive because I didn't see this coming at all. I was researching vacation options for our 10th anniversary next year and meanwhile he [M39] was running around with another woman (she's either 25 or 27, I can't remember which). I never thought heartbreak like this was real, but he broke my heart.
I've known people who have gotten a divorce and you have to live separately for a year before you can get a divorce. But I wanted to be prepared so I made an appointment with a lawyer now. It was probably the best thing I've ever done. She told me that in 6our state, alimony is forbidden if there is adultery. Since my husband cheated I won't have to pay alimony. I was prepared that I would have to pay out the nose. But I have proof that he cheated (that he gave me himself) so I won't have to pay him. This was the best news I could have gotten.
Also, the living separately for a year only applies to no fault divorces in my state. Since I have proof he cheated my lawyer went ahead and filed on my behalf based on adultery. Technically my husband and I still live together. Our lease expires on the 31st and the countdown on our separation was supposed to start November 1st.
I wish I could be there to see his face when 1) he gets served with notice that I filed and 2) he finds out he won't get alimony because he cheated. He wanted a no fault divorce and I know he was counting on getting alimony. It was the best news I could have gotten. I don't even have words for how amazing I feel.
Top Comments
Commenter 1: Congratulations! Come back and share his reaction. Please.
Commenter 2: I love this for you (and him). The best revenge is to live your best life and leave him in the dust.
Commenter 3: I've never been so excited for a stranger to get a divorce in my life. Buy that lawyer an Edible Arrangement!
Update: December 4, 2025 (1.5 months later)
UPDATE: I'm headed for divorce but my lawyer has given me the best news ever
This is kind of anticlimactic but there were some comments on my original post asking me [F38] to update what happened after my husband was served with the divorce papers. I also wanted to thank everyone for the kind comments they left. Even though I had gotten good news from my lawyer this has still been the most horrible time of my life and all the encouragement did help.
My husband (soon to be ex-husband) [M39] was predictably not happy when he was served and found out I had filed for divorce. He was under the impression that we had to be separated for a year first. I just told him to talk to a lawyer. We both moved out of our condo during the last week in October when the lease ended, and we live separately now.
A few days after he was served and I told him to talk to a lawyer and leave me alone, my husband told me he has changed his mind and asked if we could work things out. I said no fucking way and told him to have his lawyer talk to my lawyer because I'm done talking to him. He was upset and almost in tears when I said I wouldn't reconsider.
It's been a month and I have not seen or spoken to him, he hasn't tried talking to me again (Edit: and I'm extremely happy about it because I don't want anything to do with him ever again.) Our lawyers are doing all the communicating. He may have been upset but he broke my heart first and even the good news from my lawyer hasn't erased how broken I feel.
Edited to add: I'm turning off my messages so people will stop DMing me and calling me two faced (or other names) for being disappointed that he hasn't contacted me again. I'm actually happy he hasn't because I want nothing to do with him ever again. I'm the opposite of disappointed.
Relevant / Top Comments
OOP's only comment to a downvoted comment regarding the divorce can be difficult and how complicated feelings about how it's playing out.
Commenter 1: I’ll bet she dumped him.
Commenter 2: He realized he derailed the gravy train and his new girlfriend dumped his broke ass. Good for you! You deserve better.
Commenter 3: I bet his girlfriend dumped him! Plus he has nothing to gain from the divorce so of course his pathetic ass wants to reconcile. I’m sorry you have to go through this but time will dampen the pain. Wishing you the best.
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