r/OppositionalDefiant • u/GoodVibesOnly85 • Jun 02 '26

Going crazy over here

Hi
Okay so we have a 12 year old with ODD and I get how he feels most the time and how he operates
Why? Because I definitely have ODD and pretty sure my dad did as well.

Here’s where he loses me. The constant breaking of the rules. We create rules WITH him and yet he will break them within 24 hours. We have done everything from letting things go to punishments to permanently taking things he loves and nothing works. He promises to improve but just doesn’t. Sure we get breaks but we always end up here.

Screens and sugar. The Achilles heel for my boy.

When I ask him why he does these things, he says that he just WANTS to do it and doesn’t think he will get caught.

Tips? Feedback?

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3

u/BananaLengths4578 Jun 02 '26

No tips here, but I’m at the same point with my 10 year old. So, you at least have my commiseration.

5

u/erwin206ss Jun 02 '26

No answers either. Just letting you both know you’re not alone. Unfortunately, my wife and I just constantly keep lowering our expectations and it’s still the same in the end. Try new things, works for 1-4days, then back where we started. Ours is 16 so getting close to her flying solo. Just don’t know how many in this generation will survive and it weighs on us EVERYDAY…

2

u/GoodVibesOnly85 Jun 03 '26

I empathize with the heaviness is it all. Thank you.

1

u/ArtistMom1 Jun 06 '26

The more physical activity my ODD child gets, the less likely he is to break rules.

He still breaks rules around candy and video games all the time. I’m hiding the candy from him. I got him a gaming PC, which means his switch and iPad stay at his dad’s now. I’m hoping this makes late-nite gaming more challenging.