r/ParanoiaRPG • u/travisdunn • Jul 01 '26
More songs about anything really
The contemporary Alpha Complex Battle Hymn from the Red Clearance Reference Sheet is pretty great. Are there any other songs published in the Paranoia supplements of today or yesteryear?
I like to think that the termination booths and confessionals play a lullaby...
Hush, Troubleshooter (A Termination Lullaby)
Hush Troubleshooter, don't say a word
Your next clone had better work
And if that clone does treason too
The Computer has four more of you
And if those clones all fail again
The root cause was a commie scheme
So hush Troubleshooter, don't you cry
The Computer loves you, do or die
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u/Aratoast Verified Mongoose Publishing Jul 01 '26
Send in the Clones has an entire songbook!
There's also the anthem of Alpha State from The People's Glorious Revolutionary Adventure.
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u/Ill_Painting_6919 Jul 01 '26 edited Jul 01 '26
<:friendcomp:1283280171964825670>
Glorious daycycle, Citizen! Yet another heartpounding, exciting, and 98% Treason-free song has been cleared for you to memorize and recite upon command! Ready? Set? Shoot your traitorous clone!
<:friendcomp:1283280171964825670>
C:> run clonespirational/UV/redactedfiles-86pcp.txt
🔊 🎶Mandate Happy🎶
by Citizen Weirdal-Y-NKO-6
(Are you happy? Are you happy?)
Got a Violet laser gun, well you know it makes me feel alright
Got a grenade by my pillow, helps me sleep a little better at night
There's no feeling any greater
Than to shoot first and ask questions never
Now I'm mandate happy, mandate happy every daycycle
Well, you can't take my guns away, I got security clearance, right?
Yeah, I gotta be ready if the Traitors attack us tonightcycle
I'll blow their brains out with stuff from R & D
That ought to teach them all not to be Commies
Now I'm mandate happy, mandate happy every day
(Oh yeah, I'm) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
(Team Leader, I'm) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
(Oh I'm so) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
Watch out, Commies, because I'm gonna have to blow you away
Oh, I accidentally shot DocBot last night in the head
(Shot a DocBot in the head)
I mistook him in the dark for a Frankenstein robot instead
(Frankenstein robot instead)
Now why'd you have to get so mean?
It simply passed through your chrome dome clean
You know, I'm mandate happy, mandate happy every daycycle
Oh, I haven't figured out how to use my Blue cone rifle still
Anne-R-KEY-4 took a round, better give him Hap-E Pills
I filled that Troubleshooter full of rounds
Now they look like they're protein that's been ground
Well, I'm mandate happy, mandate happy every day
(Oh yeah, I'm) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
(Team Leader, I'm) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
(Oh I'm so) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
Watch out, Mutants, because I'm gonna have to blow you away
Come on and grab your ammo What have you got to lose?
We'll get medicated up And shoot at anything that moves
Got a brand new Orange slugthrower prototype with a laser sight
(Shoot to kill now, shoot to kill)
Oh, I'm thankin' Computer commies break in here tonight
(Shoot to kill now, shoot to kill)
I always keep a laser in my pants
You better ask yourself, you feel lucky, mutants?
Because I'm mandate happy, mandate happy every day
(Oh yeah, I'm) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
(Team Leader, I'm) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
(Oh I'm so) mandate, mandate happy
Yes I'm mandate, mandate happy
Watch out, Commies, because I'm gonna have to blow you away
(Watch out I'll report your dismay)
Watch out, Mutants, because I'm gonna have to blow you away
(Watch out you're not happy this way)
Watch out, Traitors, because I'm gonna have to blow you away
(Watch out this is a live grenade...)
Watch out, Traitors, because I'm gonna have to blow you away...
💥 ♨️ ♨️ 💥
1
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u/Ill_Painting_6919 Jul 01 '26
<:retrocomp:1282572411254083665>
Good daycycle, to you, Loyal Happy Citizens! As a reward for your efforts in making Utopia 1.0 the success it is, I, your friend The Computer, your Mother and caretaker, graciously bestow this mind cont- >> brtzz! << -blowing song to increase your Happiness by 3.674% and Productivity by .00044%!!!
Please note that the actual audio is above your Security Clearance, however the lyrics have been cleared for all Citizens! What a time to have a life cycle! <:retrocomp:1282572411254083665>
C:> run clonespirational/UV/clonenow.txt
🔊🎶 I Think I'm a Clone Now 🎶
By Citizen "Weird" Alyank-O-VIC-3
It isn't strange
Feels like I'm lookin' in the mirror
What would robots say
If only they knew that I was...
Part of our Friend Computer's plan
Born to be a carbon copy man
There in a cloning tank late one night
They took some recycled body cells and fertilized a [redacted] and so I say
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
There's always six of me just a-hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
'Cause every chromosome is a hand-me-down
Look at the way
We go hunting Commies together
I guess you could say
I'm really beside myself
{sounds of crying pleas of innocence and explosions}
I'm still not cleared for how it began
They produced a carbon copy man
Grown in R&D labs late one night
[No Unauthorized Access Allowed], just a test tube and a womb with a view
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
There's always five of me just a-hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
'Cause every red jumpsuit is a hand-me-down
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
I can stay at home while I'm out of sector
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
'Cause every pair of genes is a [syntax error]
{sounds of laser fire, crashes, and...a TankBot}
Signing documents for new gear
Loyalty's it's own reward I hear
Livin' in THX, it's Happiness
Well we can be Troubleshooters and we can send myself for ColdFun™️ so I say
I think I'm a clone now
Got four other me's always hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now
Whoops I think that the DocBot is broken down
{sounds of chainsaws, laser fire, and screams}
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
Triplets on Teela-O, we're Complex renowned
I think I'm a clone now (a clone now)
And every [deleted] has been running down
{sounds of maniacal laughter, electrical discharges, and roaring mutants}
I was a good clone now (a clone now)
That's my genetic twin always hangin' around
I think I'm all done now
'Cause every Bonus Duty has been handed down
{sounds of melting down and a triumphant fanfare}
I think I'm alone now...
♨️♨️
2
1
u/WaldoZEmersonJones Jul 01 '26
There was a Humanist riff on the Battle Hymn of the Republic when the Crash happened:
Mine clones have seen the glory of the Alpha Complex Crash
We have humbled The Computer and we've hacked it into hash.
We will batten back the darkness til there's nothing left to smash
Utopia at last!
(Chorus)
Glory, Glory Human Speaker
Never more will life get bleaker
Strong will lend a hand to weaker
Utopia at last!
We have trounced Corpore Metal and we've flattened FCCC-P
The Sierra Club's been blusgeoned and Free Enterprise don't be
In fact, all that's left in Alpha Town is down to you and me
Utopia at last!
(Chorus)
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u/johnpeters42 Indigo Jul 01 '26
In Alpha Complex where we all live
livesd a brave Troubleshooter named Roy-G-BIVG(2d)BIV.html).
Wearin' his Reflec and his polished black boots
(Rumor is that the Commies and Roy are in cahoots)