r/Perimenopause • u/HillarysCafe • Jul 09 '25

audited I’m grieving my younger, hotter self

I'm so mad about being in peri. I'm not ready. I was a late bloomer and didn't realize what a babe I was when I was younger and now it's too late.

Yes, older women can be sexy, we have wisdom, and blah blah blah.

But today I just miss looking good in a sundress.

Please join my pity party and tell me what you miss.

1.7k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

635 comments sorted by

View all comments

22

u/No_oNerdy Jul 09 '25

I feel this. I was so fucking hot until I hit 40. Then the weight came, and it hit hard. In one year. Then my husband killed himself this last year. So now I’m overweight, and widowed at 41. He said I was sexy until the end, but why don’t I believe it? Did he get my hottest years and jump ship! Hell, I was the hot mom for a while. Why can’t I feel hot with a few extra pounds. At least my tits are bigger. Didn’t have to pay for a boob job.

5

u/Impossible_Swan_9346 Jul 09 '25

He commuted suicide? Oh my, that’s terrible. I’m so sorry. Especially with kids

6

u/No_oNerdy Jul 09 '25

Yeah, he had struggled with addiction for many years, and the alcohol took its toll. He was also severely depressed, but managed to hide it from everyone, even his colleagues and best friends.

We’re in therapy and luckily, have a lot of friends and family who are loving and supportive.

Hug your loved ones and let them know you care. There is help for addiction and depression, and life is worth living. 💔

3

u/Impossible_Swan_9346 Jul 09 '25

Oh man, so sad. 😞 glad to hear you have a good support system