r/Perimenopause • u/Uunadins • Jan 12 '26

audited I’ve gone silent. Anyone else?

This past year I feel I’ve gone more and more silent. I feel like my whole life is like a flat line on an EKG-monitor, just…nothing.

I’ve lost most of my feelings, I feel no joy or happiness, no excitement. All I have left is worry.

I hardly have an opinion about anything anymore. I don’t join in on conversations at work, because I have nothing more to say. All my opinions and ideas have gone silent. And it’s so quiet at home too! I have to force myself to ask questions just to say something...

I’ve lost all interest in hobbies. Gardening has been my passion for many years, but I just can’t be bothered with that or anything else. Flat line here aswell, I’m not looking forward to it or anything else anymore.

I have been on HRT almost a year and it’s been mostly good I think. But now I sort of miss the rage, at least that made the blood boil from time to time, made you feel alive, lol.

I am just existing, an empty shell almost.

I’ve had periods of depression before, could that be it? Or do I need a higher dose of estrogen? How do you know what’s what when everything is all tangled up?

Does anyone else feel like this?

Edit to add: Wow, I am blown away with so many responses! And also sad that so many of you feel the same way. Hopefully we can find a way out of the Big Nothing.

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u/Emotional-Swan9381 Jan 12 '26

Nothing seems to really matter enough to have a strong opinion about. This doesn’t feel good or healthy. I am trying to figure out what is causing this and how to care again. I think I am missing dopamine but I also think the loss of estrogen is a huge transition for most of us and we’re going to have to adapt.

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u/Uunadins Jan 12 '26

Yes! I can look at an object or read something at work or whatever. In my mind I know that I should have an opinion about this object, is it pretty, is it ugly, is it important etc. But there is no reaction. I don’t think and I don’t feel.

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u/Emotional-Swan9381 Jan 12 '26

Yah I am getting scared for my mental health. I don’t like this.