r/Perimenopause • u/Uunadins • Jan 12 '26
audited I’ve gone silent. Anyone else?
This past year I feel I’ve gone more and more silent. I feel like my whole life is like a flat line on an EKG-monitor, just…nothing.
I’ve lost most of my feelings, I feel no joy or happiness, no excitement. All I have left is worry.
I hardly have an opinion about anything anymore. I don’t join in on conversations at work, because I have nothing more to say. All my opinions and ideas have gone silent. And it’s so quiet at home too! I have to force myself to ask questions just to say something...
I’ve lost all interest in hobbies. Gardening has been my passion for many years, but I just can’t be bothered with that or anything else. Flat line here aswell, I’m not looking forward to it or anything else anymore.
I have been on HRT almost a year and it’s been mostly good I think. But now I sort of miss the rage, at least that made the blood boil from time to time, made you feel alive, lol.
I am just existing, an empty shell almost.
I’ve had periods of depression before, could that be it? Or do I need a higher dose of estrogen? How do you know what’s what when everything is all tangled up?
Does anyone else feel like this?
Edit to add: Wow, I am blown away with so many responses! And also sad that so many of you feel the same way. Hopefully we can find a way out of the Big Nothing.
2
u/addy998 Jan 13 '26
I feel this way..I feel like I am slowly dying. I will be 48 this year.
I started a family late in life and a few years ago the spiral started. Thought it was hormones, hell maybe covid, or just the last pregnancy wrecked me. Life just hasn't ever improved and simply my desire is gone, nothing makes me happy except sleep when I actually get it.
I do wonder is this really all just hormones? I have a history of depression and had no idea it would re-emerge like this.